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Trying to Buy Happiness and Other Problems

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Im very depressed due to acne and feeling like my life is going nowhere. I have this problem where I will go shopping for like four hours. Half the time is looking at shoes and contemplating if I should buy a pair and the rest of the time is sitting in a restaurant by myself eating a meal. I will sit in a store for like two hours just trying to decide if I should buy a pair. Sometimes, I will sit there comparing between two or more pairs and it takes me two hours to decide sometimes! 98% of the time I end up buying a pair. Yesterday, I was comparing a pair of Asic running shoes, Puma running shoes, and a pair of Puma casua shoesl. I ended up buying the Puma running shoes, but I sat in the store for two hours trying to decided between three pairs of shoes! Something is seriously wrong here. I know that trying to buy happiness never works, but yet I still do it anyway. I dont know why it is shoes in particular. I have like fourty pairs of shoes and Im only almost 23 years old. I have absolutely no idea how to resolve this problem. I feel like my life is going nowhere. I work in a nursing home not making very much money, I shop all the time, I sleep more than eight hours a day on my days off, I binge eat a lot, I sit in front of the computer for hours at a time, and I will even do it in the middle of the night like I am doing right now and will sit here for about two hours and then go back to bed. I do this even when Im sleeping well :boohoo: Does anyone have these problems or has had these problems in the past and can give me some advice on how to stop?

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Get a hobby.

I collect stamps, do bird watching and am an admirer of antique coins.

Never a dull moment in my life, i tell ya :|

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I occasionally have the same problem - it's atually common, trying to make yourself feel better by buying things. What helps me find other ways of making myself feel better is remembering that I have to save money for bills. Sometimes that works, sometimes it doesn't. But overall, it's what I try to remember.

And Molly, forgive my not answering in this earlier. I've been up all night with a cat teetering on the edge of dying. I'm a little tired.

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I occasionally have the same problem - it's atually common, trying to make yourself feel better by buying things. What helps me find other ways of making myself feel better is remembering that I have to save money for bills. Sometimes that works, sometimes it doesn't. But overall, it's what I try to remember.

And Molly, forgive my not answering in this earlier. I've been up all night with a cat teetering on the edge of dying. I'm a little tired.

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I am tired, though I don't feel like dying. My cat is the one who is in immediate danger of dying, so I spent the night out on the living room floor with her. Tried to sleep, but couldn't. Spent most of the night with my ear on her chest, making sure her heart was still beating.

about the shopping - yeah, paying your bills first IS the way to go! I just find that I get caught up in the whole "oh, I can pay that bill NEXT payday...." until next payday comes around and I've got tons of new clothes, but not enough money to pay the electric bill. This doesn't happen so often nowadays, but on occasion, it does.

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I know what its like to lose cats. I have had four cats and I watched four of them die. One only lived to be three and we had to put him to sleep because he was obese and after we bought our other cat he got territorial and started peeing in corners all over my parents house. The other two lived to be 12 and they both died of cancer :boohoo:

I always say Im gonna leave but then I dont. I am going to finally keep that promise and leave now lol I find this sleep incredibly addictive

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That's alot of pets to lose so close to each other! I'm sorry that happened. We had to put a cat down in Sept. last year - first time I'd ever lost a pet. It was hard, I still cry. And this cat is displaying all of the characterics of the kitty we had to put down, so I'm pretty scared. But I'm just trying to remember that whatever comes, I can handle it. Always have, always will.

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I am very sorry to hear that. :(

I agree with the above post. Try to take up a hobby or an activity to keep busy and this may stop your mind from wandering so much.

Broaden your horizons and do something different perhaps? A new job or people who you wouldn't usually don't talk too. It might open up a door you never knew existed. good luck sweetie. =)

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Guest T-Virus
Get a hobby.

I collect stamps, do bird watching and am an admirer of antique coins.

Never a dull moment in my life, i tell ya :|

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Maybe you could start taking classes of some kind, like an art class? That would take your mind off of shopping.

and Elsewhere, I'm so sorry to hear about your cat :( I hope it makes it

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Guest Aloetta

Sorry to hear that... - And sorry about Kitty ^ .. Hope he/she makes it through :(...

I used to have a slight same issue.. I was also known as a Shoe Princess. :shock: .. ( guess cause I was bored, but I wanted to fit my fashion outfits)... There is a name to this....

But also because it can turn out to be IMPULSIVE BEHAVIOR, due to Boredom or an Escape to release the greif, pain or loneliness...( i don't know which)..?

Don't you have many friends to go out w/ (?)... 20's should & could be GOOD years to ENJOY LIFE... VACATION together ( try to save some monies) look forward to some beautiful tropical place...(?)

Or yes,, Try YOGA... CHI KUNG (qi QUONG) is GREAT... or tape those YOGA shows from the TUBE (T.V).

Great way to RELAX and realease TENSION and I suppose get toner...

*** :think: Please just get out there in other form other than SHOPPING for shoes... that is just Monotonous Stress calling OUT!!

And if your a SEVERE ACNE issue (?) - it will FRUSTRATE your MOOD's...

perhaps depress you more.. :wacko: Which dosn't help ACNE... :doh:

Trust ME... BEEN THERE done that.... Next will be PURSES... or JEANS... or WHATEVER!.

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Sorry to hear that... - And sorry about Kitty ^ .. Hope he/she makes it through :(...

I used to have a slight same issue.. I was also known as a Shoe Princess. :shock: .. ( guess cause I was bored, but I wanted to fit my fashion outfits)... There is a name to this....

But also because it can turn out to be IMPULSIVE BEHAVIOR, due to Boredom or an Escape to release the greif, pain or loneliness...( i don't know which)..?

Don't you have many friends to go out w/ (?)... 20's should & could be GOOD years to ENJOY LIFE... VACATION together ( try to save some monies) look forward to some beautiful tropical place...(?)

Or yes,, Try YOGA... CHI KUNG (qi QUONG) is GREAT... or tape those YOGA shows from the TUBE (T.V).

Great way to RELAX and realease TENSION and I suppose get toner...

*** :think: Please just get out there in other form other than SHOPPING for shoes... that is just Monotonous Stress calling OUT!!

And if your a SEVERE ACNE issue (?) - it will FRUSTRATE your MOOD's...

perhaps depress you more.. :wacko: Which dosn't help ACNE... :doh:

Trust ME... BEEN THERE done that.... Next will be PURSES... or JEANS... or WHATEVER!.

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Guest Aloetta

OHNO.. I'm so sorry :confused: Guess it can be distressfull/painfull..

Please do try Qi Qong (CHI KUNG)...YOGA...

I had to apply it for HEALTH ISSUES... so in the long run.... it will CIRCULATE your BLOOD... and perhaps make you feel better..

you can chk all the Benefits CHI KUNG offers -google it...

I have Two Video Tapes and at times I apply the TECHNIQUE... alothough it's advised to YOGA outside as opposed to indoors...

But really how many ppl apply OUTDOORS?

---- ---- -----

I do hope you find some hobby though... :think:

BEST OF LUCK to you.. :angel:

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I think yoga might help you, i notice you stress over small things

I stress over small things?! I have a learning disability and I barely have any friends. That is a true reason to be depressed

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Im glad you understand that depression isnt a small thing but how is looking at shoes for two hours a small thing? I get panicky when I lose things especially important things. If I hadnt found those keys I wouldve had to pay $75 per key

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OhNo, at least it sounds like you're not spending an excessive amount of $. Some women may have bought all 3 pairs of shoes. You need to take the advice above. Yoga is awesome and you may meet a friend to hang with and get involved in other interests besides shopping. But stay away from stamps, birds and coins....as they'll make your butt big.

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A hobby buying shoes is nothing new to me. Working at Saks I'd see girls who would come in and spend over an hour and a half in just the shoe department. Some try on like 10 pairs others just get 2 and sit there forever deciding. To me...this is perfectly normal. Other than that you just need some friends.

Lets look at what you said:

1. You buy shoes alone.

2. Eat alone.

3. Binge eat.

4. Sleep a ton on your days off.

5. Stay at the computer for extended amounts of time.

6. Didn't mention friends/people.

I'd reccomend anything. Pick up a sport (ie. golf/tennis). Start working out (you will meet people if you join a class or two). Try to go to bars/clubs/cafes (don't know where you live but you are still young and can enjoy yourself). There is a bunch of other things but those are just a few.

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