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PhishDMBguy

Why wont it all just go away?

so recently i've felt like my face has been improving a bit, but i still have a few pimples near my mouth that i hate. but for the last week or so i've felt good and felt maybe it was coming to an end

until i had a horrible moment today...

i was with my voice teacher and she wanted to show me something in my throat as part of a lesson she was giving. so she gave me a cosmetic mirror to hold up so i could see down my mouth. of course this made me insecure because i barely ever look at myself in the mirror because i hate looking at my acne. yes, i know, it's a problem and a major insecurity, but at least i acknowledge it. i'm really trying to work on that part of my life because i'm generally not an insecure person at all, so i'll grow out of it eventually.

anyways, this is when i noticed that my face looks terrible! i mean, i dont have a TON of acne, but the pimples i have seem so DEFINED and BUMPY that i can't bear to look at it. i went home and looked in the mirror again and noticed that on my cheeks i have a lot of skin colored acne. i had no clue i had this before.

how the hell do you get rid of that?! it looks like a bunch of little bumps below the surface of my skin that haven't come up yet. if you look at me in normal light you probably couldn't see them, but then if you look in direct light you can see my skin has a bunch of bumps below the surface.

i've been on the regimen for about 3 months now and these things dont seem to be going away. wtf do i do?! please help i'm so tired of this shit it's not even funny. it depresses me beyond belief that i can barely look myself in the mirror unless i'm in my bathroom and i have the red light on so i can't see my acne. i've also never admitted any of this stuff to anyone so please realize it was pretty hard for me to post this on the internet. acne depresses me beyond belief and pretty much ruined my vacation last week so any help you guys can give me would be great. i'm ready to give up.

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