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Anyone else have people who gloat over your acne?

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My sister, I love her, she's about 300lbs. Me, I'm not thin by any means, nor slender, or even slim or trim, but I'm not obsese...anyway, she turns to me, and she was like, "Ya know, I've always been fat, but I can lose this weight...I'm glad I'm not like you, and have acne." Then she made that "OMG, I can't believe I said that" face, but honestly, she's thrilled that I look like this.

And for the record, what's the use of a good body when you have an ugly face to top it off? (I don't mean to imply any of you are ugly, but I FEEL ugly with this face. Cystic. Hurts. u.u) My body is no prize, but I keep feeling like meh, what's the point?

Anyone else in this boat?

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That's so mean.

You know, your sister can lose the weight, but being fat doesn't just affect the way you look. She's doing so much damage to her body by being obese. Acne might not look so hot, but at least it won't cut your life short.

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well if she thinks she can lose the weight so easily why doesnt she get of her fat ass and do it. id much rather date a chic with bad acne than an obese pig.

and to answer your question no im kinda the opposite everytime im feeling down about my skin i want to hit the gym so hard and get into awesome shape, i dont though because for some reason working out hard always makes my acne worse

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That's so mean.

You know, your sister can lose the weight, but being fat doesn't just affect the way you look. She's doing so much damage to her body by being obese. Acne might not look so hot, but at least it won't cut your life short.

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I somehow managed to develop a resentment toward overwieght people - which is horrible of me, sure - but when I think of how full and bloated I am, with my sluggish metabolism, and how I STILL can maintain my weight...it kinda grosses me out to see how much a person must eat to be large (granted, there are those with actual issues, like their thyroid or whathaveyou).

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After suffering with something like acne that is so hard to combat, it's natural to develop one towards people with appearance issues that they could actually change with effort. I've changed my diet many times to try and combat acne. If eating actual human shit for 90 minutes straight while full out sprinting on a treadmill cured acne, guess what I'd be doing right now?

Many obese people just don't seem to care, and because of that, I too have a somewhat negative view of them.

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My sister, I love her, she's about 300lbs. Me, I'm not thin by any means, nor slender, or even slim or trim, but I'm not obsese...anyway, she turns to me, and she was like, "Ya know, I've always been fat, but I can lose this weight...I'm glad I'm not like you, and have acne." Then she made that "OMG, I can't believe I said that" face, but honestly, she's thrilled that I look like this.

And for the record, what's the use of a good body when you have an ugly face to top it off? (I don't mean to imply any of you are ugly, but I FEEL ugly with this face. Cystic. Hurts. u.u) My body is no prize, but I keep feeling like meh, what's the point?

Anyone else in this boat?

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You know what you can tell her? If or when she does lose weight, she will have all that extra saggy stretched marked skin hanging around and only surgery could get rid of it.

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I've also received those kinds of comments from a certain family member, e.g. 'Well, I can lose this weight and be fine underneath but you've just got crappy genes that can't ever be fixed' (she'll refer a lot to my structure, looks in general rather than just the skin side of things).. it does hurt.. a lot when you're already feeling crap about yourself but personally, I try to brush it off and pick myself up as best I can because I can be fairly sure that, in my specific case at least, these comments were said as a result of low self-esteem on her part for having the weight problem - she feels the need to put me down to boost herself up a bit, which is wrong..but I can understand how it happens.

I'll never bring up her issue of weight, however easy or tempting it may be to use as something to get my own back on her with.. because in many ways, I think there's a lot of resemblance between how we as acne sufferers might feel, and how someone with a weight problem is also probably feeling in regards to their self esteem and confidence levels. I know you could argue that many of them have effectively made themselves that way through their actions, or lack of whereas we haven't done anything through fault of our own to be suffering from this skin disease.. but myself being around someone who is overweight, I'm educated enough to know that it's not nearly as simple as just 'do some exercise or eat less'. It goes much deeper than that a lot of the time, and has come about due to emotional problems and difficulties in life that have caused them to end up how they are. And so many of these people could do with support and help, encouragement to lose the weight rather than simply being classified as greedy scum or such.. I'm going a bit off track here, but there's been a lot of posts lately from people who seem to view it in such a black+white way i.e. 'fat people are greedy, they should do some exercise'..without actually looking deeper than that and realising it's not as easy is it sounds.

Anyway, basically I mean to say that no doubt she said those things to you because she needed to boost her own self-esteem up a bit? Unfortunately as we know, for a lot of people that inevitably means putting others down in the process. . people feed off other's insecurities to make themselves feel better about their own situation.

..But at least she realises that what she said was wrong and out of line, that's a start. So maybe you could have a quiet word with her and just explain again how hurtful it is to hear those things.. it may or may not make a difference as they tend to happen on spur of the moment anyway, but maybe she'll think twice about saying it again..

Remind her that your acne will go away, just like her weight can.. that way she could possibly feel better about herself by looking towards the future, just like you can too.. instead of having to resort to putting you down in exchange for her own benefit. Maybe you two could even use the fact that you each have an insecurity to support the other, you could remind her that you love her for the person she is under her skin and she could do vice versa. Just a thought

You know what you can tell her? If or when she does lose weight, she will have all that extra saggy stretched marked skin hanging around

and only surgery could get rid of it.

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I would have gone off on her if she spoke with that tone. If she was kidding I'd be semi-okay with it but when you give a nasty rude comment liek that your ASKING for an arguement.

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My sister, I love her, she's about 300lbs. Me, I'm not thin by any means, nor slender, or even slim or trim, but I'm not obsese...anyway, she turns to me, and she was like, "Ya know, I've always been fat, but I can lose this weight...I'm glad I'm not like you, and have acne." Then she made that "OMG, I can't believe I said that" face, but honestly, she's thrilled that I look like this.

And for the record, what's the use of a good body when you have an ugly face to top it off? (I don't mean to imply any of you are ugly, but I FEEL ugly with this face. Cystic. Hurts. u.u) My body is no prize, but I keep feeling like meh, what's the point?

Anyone else in this boat?

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What a thing to say especially coming from your sister! Im sorry Neko. That was a really shitty thing for her to say to you. I feel ugly to with my face. I havent been getting new pimples since I started my new regiman but I have very deep scars all over my chin.

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No but I can think of so many comebacks to that it's ridicolous. I would have told her something along "Then why don't you lose all that fat? If you can do it so easily there is no need to be so obese and discusting." All this I could but aren't is just hilarious.

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If you dont like my hair i can wear a hat, but you're just fat there aint no hat for that.

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Your sister is just trying to make you feel as bad as her. I had a friend who was much heavier than me and she would always say mean things like that to me. After awhile, I realized that she was just doing that because I was skinnier than her and she hated me for that. She was just trying to point out my flaws to make me forget about hers. People who feel really, reeeeally down about themselves just want to drag others down with them.

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"Comebacks" or replying with insults in this situation is something a grade school child would do. Adults/educated people know that doing this does result in a vicious cycle with counter-attacks from both parties, or two people hurting one another and accomplishing nothing.

A better way to understand the situation is with compassion for the overweight sister. Understand that she is hurting about her weight problem and may not know any other way to try and make herself feel better. I'm sure she ended up feeling worse, when she really needed closeness to someone, it probably just drove you away.

I wouldn't immediately criticize her for doing it, but I would approach her at a later time and remind her specifically of the comment she made. I would tell her how it made you feel, and I'm assuming she would apologize. Maybe she will be more cautious in the future. Definitely do not make fun of an overweight person, that is the last thing they need. No one wants to be overweight. It is probably more painful than having acne, weight problems are often a LOT harder to resolve(because of the emotional reasons behind the weight), there is no nightly cream for obesity. Weight problems bring more shame as well.

In her mind, she was probably trying to "pretend" that she thought acne would be worse to have than obesity. Sounds like she was saying this out loud, to deceive herself further....to make it more believable. The "Oh-my-gosh, did I just say that?" look probably reveals her intentions. I don't think she meant to hurt you, I think she was attempting to believe what she was saying to feel some relief from the distress over her obesity condition.

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loosing weight is not as easy as she thinks, especially at 300lbs! i mean if you she was like 130 and wanted to be 120 then that would be a piece of cake, but she's gonna have to make a LIFE change in her life. so she's full of it.

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"Hey Hendrick go see a derm, you're really ugly"

*Hendrick examines his cousin's face thoroughly* "yeah too bad it runs in the family :P"

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