Jump to content
Acne.org
Search In
Find results that contain...
Find results in...
Weedman

wtf's with all these i hate life threads?

Rubern, what you are saying sounds like what every single family member says who knows that acne bothers me. They say "stop obsessing over it", "just stop!", "it's not a big deal", and on and on and on. It's not like a lightswitch where I can turn my feelings on and off. You say to stop worrying, but it's not like I'm choosing to worry! If I had the choice, I'd have stopped obsessing years ago, but I don't have a choice and that's why I'm here.

Agreed. And since I don't feel attracted to people with acne(other than maybe mild) I don't see how I could be comfortable with it.

Well there are tons of ppl that wouldent care less if you have acne or not if they are considering going out with you.

you cant base a relationship on if a person has acne or not.

what if you get married with a person that has clear skin and then they develop servere acne afterwards, your gonna divorce??

I can't base a relation on acne which is true, but it would make it hell of a lot easier if I could approach girls without having to worry about how I look and being placed on the friends ladder instantly. If I ever get married I'm sure it will be with someone I love and no I wouldn't leave that person over acne. But when I meet random girls it's not like I'm planning on being with them for the rest of my life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can't base a relation on acne which is true, but it would make it hell of a lot easier if I could approach girls without having to worry about how I look and being placed on the friends ladder instantly. If I ever get married I'm sure it will be with someone I love and no I wouldn't leave that person over acne. But when I meet random girls it's not like I'm planning on being with them for the rest of my life.

If a girl puts me on the friends ladder instantly cause of my acne than she's not a person i would want to go out with.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can't base a relation on acne which is true, but it would make it hell of a lot easier if I could approach girls without having to worry about how I look and being placed on the friends ladder instantly. If I ever get married I'm sure it will be with someone I love and no I wouldn't leave that person over acne. But when I meet random girls it's not like I'm planning on being with them for the rest of my life.

If a girl puts me on the friends ladder instantly cause of my acne than she's not a person i would want to go out with.

Why not? What's the point in being together if you are not attracted to the other person? Might as well be friends if there is no physical attraction.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

what i meant is that if a person instantly decides that im not worth being with cause of my acne then that say a lot about the kind of person that person is and even if she is the most attractive person in the world i dont want to be with someone like that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

what i meant is that if a person instantly decides that im not worth being with cause of my acne then that say a lot about the kind of person that person is and even if she is the most attractive person in the world i dont want to be with someone like that.

So friends are not worth being with in your opinion?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Rubern, what you are saying sounds like what every single family member says who knows that acne bothers me. They say "stop obsessing over it", "just stop!", "it's not a big deal", and on and on and on. It's not like a lightswitch where I can turn my feelings on and off. You say to stop worrying, but it's not like I'm choosing to worry! If I had the choice, I'd have stopped obsessing years ago, but I don't have a choice and that's why I'm here.

my psychiatrist showed me a poem when I was really down that ended with the words " do you think I would choose to feel this way if I could?"

He told me it was the best way to some up how I was feeling if someone said the dreaded 'get over it' line. you didnt write the poem did ya??

rubern the point of this forum is for people to vent when they've no one to talk to,writing down how ya feel can be a huge release and make people feel better. I love that this forum is here, its an excellent idea

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest

Let's clarify. This board is called the emotional and psychological affects of ACNE. If there are people coming to this board, especially those between the ages of 12-19, who have mild acne or the same amount of acne any pre-pubescent or teenage person and are finding a safe haven in obsessing, worrying and complaining about "how bad it is" on here, that is not healthy. They need to seek help for something else on a different board or with a professional, perhaps for Body Dysmorphic Disorder or depression, anxiety etc etc. Or hey, maybe they just need to build a little self-confidence and figure out for themselves that it's not such a fuckin big deal...

Everyone, you must stop turning this into an "everyone has a right to be here! Regardless of the amount of acne!" argument, it is ludacrous. Like it or not this board is beneficial but it is also potentially damaging and dangerous. Some 15 year old kid worried about his skin googles acne and comes to this board, and after reading six or seven "GOD MY LIFE IS SHIT" posts - what once was a mild annoyance is now cause for a serious amount of mental anguish. That's the internet.

We don't know people's situations. Some people could just come here to vent and actually be ok in their day to day life. I will stick by my opinion that a lot of people who use this board are in highschool, and another majority of people simply have it in their, be it from the media or shitty friends, that acne makes them ugly and unnattractive.

I guess the worst thing about this board when it comes right down to it is there is there is too much of an opportunity to spend hours and hours on here whining about how acne holds you back in life, how you can't find a significant other because of it, when you could be out there living live proving yourself wrong...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Let's clarify. This board is called the emotional and psychological affects of ACNE. If there are people coming to this board, especially those between the ages of 12-19, who have mild acne or the same amount of acne any pre-pubescent or teenage person and are finding a safe haven in obsessing, worrying and complaining about "how bad it is" on here, that is not healthy. They need to seek help for something else on a different board or with a professional, perhaps for Body Dysmorphic Disorder or depression, anxiety etc etc. Or hey, maybe they just need to build a little self-confidence and figure out for themselves that it's not such a fuckin big deal...

Everyone, you must stop turning this into an "everyone has a right to be here! Regardless of the amount of acne!" argument, it is ludacrous. Like it or not this board is beneficial but it is also potentially damaging and dangerous. Some 15 year old kid worried about his skin googles acne and comes to this board, and after reading six or seven "GOD MY LIFE IS SHIT" posts - what once was a mild annoyance is now cause for a serious amount of mental anguish. That's the internet.

We don't know people's situations. Some people could just come here to vent and actually be ok in their day to day life. I will stick by my opinion that a lot of people who use this board are in highschool, and another majority of people simply have it in their, be it from the media or shitty friends, that acne makes them ugly and unnattractive.

I guess the worst thing about this board when it comes right down to it is there is there is too much of an opportunity to spend hours and hours on here whining about how acne holds you back in life, how you can't find a significant other because of it, when you could be out there living live proving yourself wrong...

Really? We don't know people's situations? And still you seem to have a very clear picture of the people here? Fyi I'm 21 and I don't have body dysmorphia my acne is mild/moderate and still I come here. It's so easy to say what others should do still you don't really know much about other situations.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There are so many threads in this forum about people saying how much they hate their life and how acne has ruined everything for them and that they cannot go on any longer this way. I dont want to sound mean or anything but c'mon guys, a lot of ya are obsessing over nothing!!

Seriosly the ammount of threads here about people being depressed over their acne is amazing and the thing is that there are so many that are just unfounded.

I just find it hard to understand how a person can say that they have no life cause of acne and then after cheching out the person's gallery pics there skin looks great, almost perfect except for maybe a few pimples here n there or a few red marks. This is just an obsession guys, seriosly get a grip a lot of you are depressed over nothing.

Its useless to seek perfection cause you'll never achieve it, no one has and no one will ever, so just STOP OBSESSING :hand:

I know that there are also a lot of ppl who have bad acne and i can relate to that and how depressing it is at times, but i just cant get how a person with really mild acne or a few bearly noticable scars can post such depressing things on these boards.

Point of this thread: PEOPLE GET A GRIP, YOU LIVE ONCE SO SORRY IF I'M HARSH BUT CUT THE CRAP STOP WHINING AND START LIVING.

there now you can all start hating me :wacko:

this is the emotional board. People arent here to read posts about people saying "get over yourselves." theyre here for support because they feel like they cant get it anywhere else, and they dont have anyone to talk to about it. A lot of times people do hate life every now and then, whats wrong with that? Absolutely nothing. Everyone can get majorly depressed every now and then, its a part of life. Coming into a board where theyre supposed to get support for this and telling them to stop obessing is a little unnecessary. They will learn on their own time, but no ones seeking for perfection. People are seeking for acceptance, and here they can get it, so why ruin that? Just because they make one thread doesnt mean they hate their lives all the time, so just let them go, and receive the words of encouragement from these boardmates. it helps.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest

I said a lot of the people are in high school because I read a lot of posts with high school situations in it and people stating their age...not very hard to deduce. The second opinion is my own because I agree with rubern in many regards.

I said we don't know a lot of people's situations because regardless of age and what I have mentioned, we don't know who these people are after they get off this board. Yes, you're 21 and still come to this board, that's exactly why I said we don't know people's situations. I'm 20 and I come to this board and I joined in 04, but notice the important difference. I have less than 400 posts and you have over 1500 and you joined later than I did. My interests do not lie in defending this board, it serves its purpose when it's used correctly. You probably have a much more vested interest in defending this board regardless of what it's doing to people, seeing as you use this site so often. That's just my opinion, once again. We don't know everyone's situation.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I said a lot of the people are in high school because I read a lot of posts with high school situations in it and people stating their age...not very hard to deduce. The second opinion is my own because I agree with rubern in many regards.

I said we don't know a lot of people's situations because regardless of age and what I have mentioned, we don't know who these people are after they get off this board. Yes, you're 21 and still come to this board, that's exactly why I said we don't know people's situations. I'm 20 and I come to this board and I joined in 04, but notice the important difference. I have less than 400 posts and you have over 1500 and you joined later than I did. My interests do not lie in defending this board, it serves its purpose when it's used correctly. You probably have a much more vested interest in defending this board regardless of what it's doing to people, seeing as you use this site so often. That's just my opinion, once again. We don't know everyone's situation.

Umm how exactly has the amount of posts I've made on this board compared to you any relevance to my opinion on your efforts on convincing people that acne isn't a real problem? The amount of posts I have compared to you isn't exactly relevant in this discussion since there is no proof that the amount of posts have any relevance to what I think about people here. If you are insuniating that I don't have any interests other than this board then that is just ridicolous. Defending this board has nothing to do with the amount of posts, it has more to do with that I think this is a good place to vent.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest

You don't really read my posts, do you? I only have one thing to say.

My effort is not to make people see that acne is not the problem. My effort is to make people see that they could be better helped by either seeking the help of a professional or doing something that desensitizes them to their fears (eg if you are afraid of girls make a concerted effort to talk to more of them).

In so many words, there is a basic opposition going on here that has to be balanced. On the one hand, a lot of people say they get no sympathy from parents or other people who simply tell them to "get over it". On the other, there are many people who wake up everyday and let how they look determine how they will feel and then come to the board and write about how life is shit when there are an infinte number of things that could make it better, but they will miss all of those things because they already have it in their head that they "just can't do it" or "aren't good enough."

In conclusion, to get better people need to make an effort to get better. The problem with acne is that there is always hope, always the chance that "I will be clear tomorrow" or that "This new drug/topical/etc will clear me up" and people can go on saying that stuff without doing a single goddamn thing otherwise to make themselves happy or actually try to cope with the situation they're in. Not good, and repeated sympathy for this kind of behavior only solidifies this "I'm no good with my acne" mentality. So, in the end, the balance needs to be struck between this parental kick in the ass "Stop bitching and get on with it" and this soppy "Ohh honey it's ok, we all feel for you"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You don't really read my posts, do you? I only have one thing to say.

My effort is not to make people see that acne is not the problem. My effort is to make people see that they could be better helped by either seeking the help of a professional or doing something that desensitizes them to their fears (eg if you are afraid of girls make a concerted effort to talk to more of them).

In so many words, there is a basic opposition going on here that has to be balanced. On the one hand, a lot of people say they get no sympathy from parents or other people who simply tell them to "get over it". On the other, there are many people who wake up everyday and let how they look determine how they will feel and then come to the board and write about how life is shit when there are an infinte number of things that could make it better, but they will miss all of those things because they already have it in their head that they "just can't do it" or "aren't good enough."

In conclusion, to get better people need to make an effort to get better. The problem with acne is that there is always hope, always the chance that "I will be clear tomorrow" or that "This new drug/topical/etc will clear me up" and people can go on saying that stuff without doing a single goddamn thing otherwise to make themselves happy or actually try to cope with the situation they're in. Not good, and repeated sympathy for this kind of behavior only solidifies this "I'm no good with my acne" mentality. So, in the end, the balance needs to be struck between this parental kick in the ass "Stop bitching and get on with it" and this soppy "Ohh honey it's ok, we all feel for you"

Well that's your opinion, but:

1. Most people don't need to see a psychologist, they just want to share their feelings with people who share the same problems.

2. Where have you seen people discouraging guys from talking to girls?

3. Hope is probably the best thing we have. Without hope I sure as hell wouldn't accomplish much.

4. Sometimes people need to be comforted thus sentences like "Ohh honey it's ok, we all feel for you." might be a very good sentence when someone has been insulted because they have acne, dumped because of it or been treated badly because they have acne. When people come here with problems like "I have nothing to do because of acne please help me" I'm sure you'll find that people will try and help and not only say it's ok.

5. Acne might not be the only problem but is a problem and for many it means that they look ugly and being ugly has effect on self esteem.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest

santacruz let me at this point say that I have no interest in making people feel unwanted or giving them the cold shoulder, but there is a point my friend when people have to man up and say "Ok, I have acne - but it will not stop me from living the life I want"

And hope might be a pretty word but it is NOT ALWAYS A GOOD THING. If you didn't get that from what I wrote above...I don't know. Read Waiting for the Miracle by Leonard Cohen. Waiting for the miracle can be a terrible thing, think of how much time you waste doing it. Waiting for your skin to clear up before you decide to start acting on life is a terrible thing. Period

I don't know where you got #2 from, I was just using it as an example. But to put it in context, for anyone who has ever said "I will never have a girlfriend because of acne" on this board - talking to as many girls as possible is probably the best advice you can give these people and it sure as fuck is better than moping about it. So what stops people from doing it? Fear. How do we stop being afraid? By repeatedly putting ourselves in the situations that scare us.

You're right, not everyone needs a psychologist, but if you are experiencing severe mental duress, why not? Find someone you like just to talk to, you don't have to agree with what they say. But if you find someone who will listen and work with you very closely, it is a very good thing, trust me.

But you do understand the basic premise of what I'm saying right? The best thing a community like this can do is promote self-worth in the people who are suffering, so that the next time someone makes a comment about them, they don't take it to the bank and repeatedly come here saying how their day/life was wrecked by some asshole's talk. If this community is engendering a sense of victimization or "Woe is me, poor acne afflicted soul!" then it is a terrible place for people with the problem to be.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Correct, depression is ultimately a chemical imbalance in the brain caused by certain triggers of the past such as acne for instance. Although the physical condition of acne may have gone or be very minor that imbalance still remains. Its very similar to post-natal depression. I know of a mother who was all full of life before giving birth to twins. She was very well supported financially and emotionally by her family and husband and from the outside it looks like a dream family environment, yet PND still hit her. And its all down to chemical reactions to giving birth, not so much her Will as is common perception.

ummm you didn't take science very far in school did you? because you're wrong.

you can't have a chemical imbalance from a "trigger" the imblance is genetic and you're born with it and the trigger just exasperbates the situation.

Post natal depression is again due to the sudden hormonal change which is biological and NOT under someone's control.

Talk thereapy and behaviour modification can help in minor cases but it is NOT just a matter of flicking the switch.

for someone who seems so educated how did you miss that?? :think::naughty:

Ignorance is bliss. Find me a solid article which states that Chemical imbalances are always 100% due to the gentic makeup of a person. Which is what your implying. Don't try because you won't.

To destroy your reply in one sweep : Hormones are chemical messengers passed between cells in the body. you said ""Post natal depression is again due to the sudden hormonal change which is biological and NOT under someone's control."" (at what point did i suggest it was under someones control). What do we get when theres hormonal change? chemical imbalance. Yes it can be triggered. It can also be changed. Many drugs work by balancing the chemicals.

(This next bit is not fact, only my personal view) Also if one was to apply logic and reason they would also realise that the depression caused and/or elevated by acne can also be connected to in a way to the hormonal changes experienced during puberty. Depression is arguably caused by chemical imbalance, and so is acne. Depression has risen over the last 100 years by a large percentage, as has acne. Ultimately it is what we eat which is to blame and it isnt due to fat and sugar. It is due to the chemically processed and hormone altered food we eat today. Again id like to stress that that is my personal view and not of mainstream thought, the dermatologist/skin care folk would want you to think differently. Pick this part out to argue if you wish, but we could argue on it a long time and to be honest

Back onto subject. Yes, people are born with that imbalance and theres a larger tendancy for a person to develop depression if it runs in the family.

But it isnt as clear cut as that. Theres many different causes and up to now there has never been a specific cause identified for Depression.

you said ""Talk thereapy and behaviour modification can help in minor cases but it is NOT just a matter of flicking the switch.

for someone who seems so educated how did you miss that?? :think::naughty: ""

Perhaps i didn't explain it very well first time round, i was merely acting as support for the many people on this board and wasnt trying to provoke nit picking. The original poster was in fact the person who thinks its as easy as flicking a switch, my position is the exact opposite.

Also one more thing, don't beleive everything you were taught in science. Science class has been known to teach theory's as if fact.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hey, then stay out of the emo board. where else will people get a chance to vent? leave them alone.

:lol::badgrin::P EMO BOARD...

OMG this is hilarious... seriously Depression is combined with Acne causing people extreme distress and unhappiness. Either they're going to find a solution to the problem or they're going to grow their hair over one side of their face and wear really bad stage make up and listen to EMO. Life's a bitch sometimes and they wanna rant let them. Often discussing issues with others will help and give you the sense of a community issue rather than you're facing it alone. I have Depression and deal with it through the combination of Zoloft(that little happy rock/egg, which by the way makes me laugh even more) and therapy. Given some peoples circumstances they might not be able to afford Depression medication or it's gone undiagnosed. Which is sad. So the boards are a type of theraputic venting station for them.

I'm still just laughing about the EMO board. :lol::lol::lol:

rofl

thats funny i can't stop laughing at YOU cause you a fucking joke :P

Let's clarify. This board is called the emotional and psychological affects of ACNE. If there are people coming to this board, especially those between the ages of 12-19, who have mild acne or the same amount of acne any pre-pubescent or teenage person and are finding a safe haven in obsessing, worrying and complaining about "how bad it is" on here, that is not healthy. They need to seek help for something else on a different board or with a professional, perhaps for Body Dysmorphic Disorder or depression, anxiety etc etc. Or hey, maybe they just need to build a little self-confidence and figure out for themselves that it's not such a fuckin big deal...

Everyone, you must stop turning this into an "everyone has a right to be here! Regardless of the amount of acne!" argument, it is ludacrous. Like it or not this board is beneficial but it is also potentially damaging and dangerous. Some 15 year old kid worried about his skin googles acne and comes to this board, and after reading six or seven "GOD MY LIFE IS SHIT" posts - what once was a mild annoyance is now cause for a serious amount of mental anguish. That's the internet.

We don't know people's situations. Some people could just come here to vent and actually be ok in their day to day life. I will stick by my opinion that a lot of people who use this board are in highschool, and another majority of people simply have it in their, be it from the media or shitty friends, that acne makes them ugly and unnattractive.

I guess the worst thing about this board when it comes right down to it is there is there is too much of an opportunity to spend hours and hours on here whining about how acne holds you back in life, how you can't find a significant other because of it, when you could be out there living live proving yourself wrong...

Really? We don't know people's situations? And still you seem to have a very clear picture of the people here? Fyi I'm 21 and I don't have body dysmorphia my acne is mild/moderate and still I come here. It's so easy to say what others should do still you don't really know much about other situations.

here here! :clap::clap:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest ilovepancakes

Emotional and psycholocial---- vent about the world :mad: let it all out

Lounge---- forget your troubles and play around :)

:popcorn:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thinking positive is hard sometimes, and some people have it harder than others, i'm not gonna argue with you on that, i do respect the journey cause i'v been through it and to so extent i am still going through it. But as you said yourself, its very important to put things into perspective.

Depression is a such a cruel condition and acne on top of depression can really amplify the effects. But if a persons depression is a direct result of acne then its in a way somewhat different.

There are too many people here that say they there lives are really depressing cause of their acne, people that want to quit their job, drop out of school, end realtionships cause of their acne. You cant put your life on hold cause of acne ESPECIALLY IF YOUR ACNE IS MILD :naughty: , that what i used to do, well it doesnt work that way i wish it did but it doesnt. Maybe by reading my previous post you all think that im Mr. Confidence but im not, far from it.

There's this guy at my school who has really bad acne, much worst that bout 85% of the pics i see on here but he doesnt let it get to him, he's a cool guy, very outgoing and has loads of friends. He's a much stronger person(mentally) than i am and i really respect him for that.

I understand that if someone's acne is more severe than all this is really hard, and maybe it seems impossible. As i said before i read a lot of the posts here and you people seem like really nice people, and having clear skin doesnt make anyone a better person, clear skin isnt the holy grail of life, everyone has defects, my m8 has really clear skin but i'm a killer guitarist :P, even if i say so myself, point being we all got our good and bad aspects and all the poeple worth being with and making friends with see this aswell and they see beyond exterior things, things we cant really control.

I haven't read the whole of this thread - infact I've read only the first page.

People react differently to things like this. You can't click you're fingers and stop someone from being depressed. I know you're post is trying to be somewhat positive, but as far as I can see I thought this part of the forum was to give people support not kick them while they're down? I'm sure this was not you're intention but that's how I read it and interpreted it.

I'm pleased that you don't let acne get you down, I really am. But others need support as they don't find it quite so easy to just "get on with life." It's all about individuality I guess.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You're right in the fact that some of us do have very mild acne, and as such, "should" not be affected as much as those who have moderate or severe acne. Unfortunatly, human pain, insecurity, fear, and upset isn't limited to what others think we "should" or "shouldn't" feel. I'm sure you've run into this in your own life and have been frustrated with it.

But I also think there is a way to be supportive and get the information across without minimizing anothers pain. A simple "Hey, it's not so bad, get out there and see the world! You can do it!" is going to be alot better (and piss off fewer members) than "You pussy. You're complaigning about nothing."

This is board that provides support for acne sufferers. All acne sufferers. I did not see a sign on the front page that says "ONLY FOR THOSE WITH REAL ACNE."

It simply says "ACNE.ORG."

You can respect that, your own experience, and everyone else's at the same time. Certaintly at least in the forum that is specifically for the support of such.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

:hand: We are loosing the whole point of the thread here, of course no one has the right to judge how other people feel and of course that everone here is welcome weather they have mild acne or sever, that wasnt what i was trying to say in the first place.

What i wanted to point out in my first post was that there is an overwhelming ammount of people here that have VERY MILD ACNE and because of this they are living unhappy and depressed lives. In my opinion that just isnt right and sorry again if im being harsh with my words but i dunno of anyother way to put it rather than an obsession.

Who am i to judge others??

Absolutly no one, just some guy on the internet, but when i read a thread about a person that has such mild acne that its not even noticable and the person says they want to quit school or quit their job or dump their partner or stay indoors cause of it, it just isnt right and its blowing it out of proportion.

And say whatever you want but the Fact is that ruining your own life over acne that is so mild its barely noticable isnt right and even though being simpathetic with such people is nice and will make them feel better someone has to step up and say:

'You are creating your own problems, Stop obsessing and Stop making something extremly minor seem like the end of the world and yes Get a grip, If your depressed over acne that is barely existant then the problem isnt the acne at all but its something your creating yourself.'

I agree with you RightOK.

Let's clarify. This board is called the emotional and psychological affects of ACNE. If there are people coming to this board, especially those between the ages of 12-19, who have mild acne or the same amount of acne any pre-pubescent or teenage person and are finding a safe haven in obsessing, worrying and complaining about "how bad it is" on here, that is not healthy. They need to seek help for something else on a different board or with a professional, perhaps for Body Dysmorphic Disorder or depression, anxiety etc etc. Or hey, maybe they just need to build a little self-confidence and figure out for themselves that it's not such a fuckin big deal...

Everyone, you must stop turning this into an "everyone has a right to be here! Regardless of the amount of acne!" argument, it is ludacrous. Like it or not this board is beneficial but it is also potentially damaging and dangerous. Some 15 year old kid worried about his skin googles acne and comes to this board, and after reading six or seven "GOD MY LIFE IS SHIT" posts - what once was a mild annoyance is now cause for a serious amount of mental anguish. That's the internet.

We don't know people's situations. Some people could just come here to vent and actually be ok in their day to day life. I will stick by my opinion that a lot of people who use this board are in highschool, and another majority of people simply have it in their, be it from the media or shitty friends, that acne makes them ugly and unnattractive.

I guess the worst thing about this board when it comes right down to it is there is there is too much of an opportunity to spend hours and hours on here whining about how acne holds you back in life, how you can't find a significant other because of it, when you could be out there living live proving yourself wrong...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

But I think the problem is that even if a person has extremely mild acne they can't always just say to themselves 'I need to get a grip' and just snap out of feeling the way they do about it. I don't think people are ultimately deciding to be depressed about something just because. Why would they actually want to do that? I totally agree that it isn't right that their lives are being taking over and consumed by their skin, but what can they do about it? they can't just stop thinking negatively about it if it genuinely bothers them. You can't just snap out of it easy peasey. It sucks you in. I agree with you when you say that sometimes people need to be reminded that it isn't actually all that bad but it usually won't make a difference to how they're feeling. And there are better ways of saying it rather than more or less telling them to 'get a grip', that's not constructive advice so it's pointless in telling them. It's all about how your acne, however mild it may be, affects you. I'm sure we all know that staying inside because of a new breakout or whatever is wrong and we shouldn't let it affect us to that degree but yet we do it sometimes because when something gets to you that much, you don't think logically. You can't always think 'I shouldn't let it get to me this much' and just carry on with your life because sometimes you just can't help it, no matter how ridiculous it is, the way you feel about it can be out of your control. Getting over the fact your skin isn't all that bad or could be much worse is easier said than done. I do understand where you're coming from though, and like I said, I agree with you when you say it's wrong that people can let their skin take over their lives, but if you're going to be harsh on them about it, just make sure that you give them some constructive advice too, like encouragement to go and see a professional if needs be, otherwise it's useless simply telling them to get a grip and stop being so ridiculous, I'm sure they're well aware of that themselves but just need help in breaking out of that cycle, even if they have it really mild they still need to be able to share their feelings and receive some understanding support from others. I think it really comes down to the fact that they wouldn't be feeling the way they do about their skin if they knew how to stop feeling thay way, that goes for all of us really.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I haven't read the whole of this thread - infact I've read only the first page.

People react differently to things like this. You can't click you're fingers and stop someone from being depressed. I know you're post is trying to be somewhat positive, but as far as I can see I thought this part of the forum was to give people support not kick them while they're down? I'm sure this was not you're intention but that's how I read it and interpreted it.

I'm pleased that you don't let acne get you down, I really am. But others need support as they don't find it quite so easy to just "get on with life." It's all about individuality I guess.

Im not clicking my fingers at anyone, all i'm trying to do is show them a different point of view to their problem.

If your a mild acne sufferer then acne might truly seem like the end of the world to you and your feelings may be just as bad as a person that has severe acne.

But we still cant change the fact that the point of view in which such people are viewing their situation is wrong even though to them it might seem like the correct one, it isnt.

If a person that has really mild acne comes here and posts a thread about how acne is ruining their lifes and that there gonna start hiding away ect.. we all could offer support and throw hugs and cuddels at them and it would probably make them feel better for a short ammount of time but doing that is avoiding the real problem, and its offering a cycle of self-pity. Saying that is saying what they WANT to hear but its not what they NEED to hear, and the quicker they realise that a couple of pimples and red marks arent worth hiding away over the better for them.

Again i know it isnt easy but the way i see it is there are 2 options:

1) The easy way out, hiding away and over exagerating the condition, coming here for support and becoming obsessed over something minimal

2) The hard way, rationally asking yourself: is it really worth it to wast my life away over a couple of zits?

yea, sure there a pain in the ass as is all acne, thats true, but you gotta face your problem head on and realise that mild acne isnt worth wasting your life away over.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree that a lot of people here really do over exaggerate the state of their acne. I think that everybody has the right to feel bad about their acne but I think that it can also make the people here who have pretty bad acne feel even worse about themselves. My skin is getting a lot better because of roaccuntane but when it was really bad and I mean really, really bad and I read posts from people complaining about their 'terrible acne' then seeing a photo of them with pretty much flawless skin it made me feel awful.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok this is actually my second official account here on acne.org.

I joined here sometime last summer. I was looking around for something to help my skin and i bumped across this site.

Rubern and Rightok do you ever get that feeling like you wanna kill yourself or this feels like the end of the world?

Well sometimes when I look at how my life is and how my skin is I feel like that. I've had depression ever since i was around 14 when i started having an eating disorder. I'm always trying to get my body to a certain size and try every way to make my skin look better. Till this day I'm 22 I still can't eat correctly and stop being insecure about myself.

Sometimes I wanna cry and tell someone about my problems, but i have noone else to tell.

Rightok you said that all these threads about "i hate my life" etc can affect kids going thru puberty etc... but doesn't alot of things on the internet affect kids/teens?

I have this choice of either going under my covers and crying or typing this out to the board so I can share with ppl with similar problems like me.

This board has helped me alot.. my skin is finally getting at least to where I can be like ok with it...

but my point is.. this is the only place that I say these things too.. I don't tell anyone about this problem I have.

Ppl may say you should get help etc.. but how many ppl actually go get help?

And if u guys don't like hearing ppl post those kind of threads.. its your choice to click in and read.. usually the title says it all

I think i've posted about 5 threads total about how i hate acne and my life

yea i wish i had a higher self esteem and be able to look straight and be happy about my life..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Personalized Advice Quiz - All of Acne.org in just a few minutes


×