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MichaelCH

I feel like crap all the time, I can't help it :(

HI

I'm so depressed again...this was probably the worst year of my life. And the really bad thing is that no'one understands it! My parents always tell me that I have beautiful skin etc. etc. but they just don't get it! This morning my mother yelled at me and thought I should see a psychiatristbecause I have another problem than my acne...yeah she might be right but I don't want to hear: "Oh your skin looks beautiful...try to smile and enjoy life a bit more and don't care about something that isn't a real problem" .... I'm sick of thinking about accutane, vitamin e, dry and flaky skin, oily noise and all that shit! In my eyes my skin is damaged, red, dry like shit and I still get little pimples especially after microdermabrasion. Like now it's horrible! Today I didn't go to university, I didn't go to work and told them I was sick...I just can't stand it anymore!! How are you guys able to handle this? I mean I always look for a person with a similar problem in university to feel better..but all my friends look awesome, are self-confident and have beautiful skin. I feel like the most disgusting person and I wonder why they even talk to me. Furthermore I'm completely down because I've been single for 2 years now and I don't think I'll find anyone ever again especially because I look horrible and I have zero (or rather below zero) self confidence.

I've never really believed in god...just that they're must be some "good" power surrounding us...but hell no! Why would anyone or anything let us suffer like this. My life is worthless...I hate it from the time I get up until I go to bed. It's just an ordeal. I really wish I just don't wake up tomorrow :wall:

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It's just an ordeal.

i know, it is an ordeal sometimes. just waking up some days and getting energy to do things can be hard. you just have to get through the bad times... i know this doesn't sound very helpful, but you could always see a derm for better treatment OR seeing someone like a counselor to help you with your problems might be a good idea. nothing wrong with that! that is what they are there for. good luck!

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hey

same thing with me. I skipped class today because my face is aboslutely terrible today...My mom basically screamed similar things at me (ie. it's not a real problem etc etc). sorry to hear about your situation, it does indeed suck.

stay strong as best as you can.

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I have been in hiding since Friday, I know how you feel. My skin is generally clear how, except for the scars, but I always have one cyst. One leaves, another pops up. They are hideous, the most awful cysts I have ever seen. I don't want anyone to see me. I even refused to answer the door to the postman, I mean he doesn't know me but still he is a human being and I am in 100% hiding. I just pray for the day when my skin is good again. I hope I am not like this over Christmas and new year, I won't be able to hide but I won't want to face anyone either. :ninja:

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Guest max_powers585

i hear you man , i have felt like this way too many times. fucken acne...

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HI

I'm so depressed again...this was probably the worst year of my life. And the really bad thing is that no'one understands it! My parents always tell me that I have beautiful skin etc. etc. but they just don't get it! This morning my mother yelled at me and thought I should see a psychiatristbecause I have another problem than my acne...yeah she might be right but I don't want to hear: "Oh your skin looks beautiful...try to smile and enjoy life a bit more and don't care about something that isn't a real problem" .... I'm sick of thinking about accutane, vitamin e, dry and flaky skin, oily noise and all that shit! In my eyes my skin is damaged, red, dry like shit and I still get little pimples especially after microdermabrasion. Like now it's horrible! Today I didn't go to university, I didn't go to work and told them I was sick...I just can't stand it anymore!! How are you guys able to handle this? I mean I always look for a person with a similar problem in university to feel better..but all my friends look awesome, are self-confident and have beautiful skin. I feel like the most disgusting person and I wonder why they even talk to me. Furthermore I'm completely down because I've been single for 2 years now and I don't think I'll find anyone ever again especially because I look horrible and I have zero (or rather below zero) self confidence.

I've never really believed in god...just that they're must be some "good" power surrounding us...but hell no! Why would anyone or anything let us suffer like this. My life is worthless...I hate it from the time I get up until I go to bed. It's just an ordeal. I really wish I just don't wake up tomorrow :wall:

i hear ya man!! i feel like that too!! .. it sucks some serious sh*t!!! .. i wish i could live my life without always worrying about my skin!! that would be AMAZING!!... i just hope one day i won't hafta deal with this anymore.. and just think how sweet our lives will be when all this is over!! .. i know i''ll definatly appreciate the little things in life a lot more, then i would have, had i not gone thru all this!!

try to stay strong!! .. one day things will be better .. i hope :pray:

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HI

I'm so depressed again...this was probably the worst year of my life. And the really bad thing is that no'one understands it! My parents always tell me that I have beautiful skin etc. etc. but they just don't get it! This morning my mother yelled at me and thought I should see a psychiatristbecause I have another problem than my acne...yeah she might be right but I don't want to hear: "Oh your skin looks beautiful...try to smile and enjoy life a bit more and don't care about something that isn't a real problem" .... I'm sick of thinking about accutane, vitamin e, dry and flaky skin, oily noise and all that shit! In my eyes my skin is damaged, red, dry like shit and I still get little pimples especially after microdermabrasion. Like now it's horrible! Today I didn't go to university, I didn't go to work and told them I was sick...I just can't stand it anymore!! How are you guys able to handle this? I mean I always look for a person with a similar problem in university to feel better..but all my friends look awesome, are self-confident and have beautiful skin. I feel like the most disgusting person and I wonder why they even talk to me. Furthermore I'm completely down because I've been single for 2 years now and I don't think I'll find anyone ever again especially because I look horrible and I have zero (or rather below zero) self confidence.

I've never really believed in god...just that they're must be some "good" power surrounding us...but hell no! Why would anyone or anything let us suffer like this. My life is worthless...I hate it from the time I get up until I go to bed. It's just an ordeal. I really wish I just don't wake up tomorrow :wall:

I feel the same way...It feel good to hear from someone whose feeling the same way I'm feeling..cause noone understand..cause the bastards have nice skin.....I know your hurting man...and I'm so sorry you have to feel that way.....its just I know and you probably know tooo...that you'll never be happy untill you heal your heart..or should I say.... our skin...it so hard :cry: everyone always tell me to get over it...but how do you get over yourself? I feel your pain man!! I hope things get better for you

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Guest Molly Jean

HI

I'm so depressed again...this was probably the worst year of my life. And the really bad thing is that no'one understands it! My parents always tell me that I have beautiful skin etc. etc. but they just don't get it! This morning my mother yelled at me and thought I should see a psychiatristbecause I have another problem than my acne...yeah she might be right but I don't want to hear: "Oh your skin looks beautiful...try to smile and enjoy life a bit more and don't care about something that isn't a real problem" .... I'm sick of thinking about accutane, vitamin e, dry and flaky skin, oily noise and all that shit! In my eyes my skin is damaged, red, dry like shit and I still get little pimples especially after microdermabrasion. Like now it's horrible! Today I didn't go to university, I didn't go to work and told them I was sick...I just can't stand it anymore!! How are you guys able to handle this? I mean I always look for a person with a similar problem in university to feel better..but all my friends look awesome, are self-confident and have beautiful skin. I feel like the most disgusting person and I wonder why they even talk to me. Furthermore I'm completely down because I've been single for 2 years now and I don't think I'll find anyone ever again especially because I look horrible and I have zero (or rather below zero) self confidence.

I've never really believed in god...just that they're must be some "good" power surrounding us...but hell no! Why would anyone or anything let us suffer like this. My life is worthless...I hate it from the time I get up until I go to bed. It's just an ordeal. I really wish I just don't wake up tomorrow :wall:

We are the same age! Im just a few months younger than you. My birthday is in late April, the 26th. We sound very similar. I dont really believe in God either. I freaking hate the concept of God. If God really existed why would people be depressed all the time and why would they suffer, why would he bring people in the world that dont want to be alive. I mean we didnt ask to be born. Even if I did believe in God, I wouldnt think of God as a human being! Lots of people take God and the bible too literally. Im sorry if this offends anyone here but this is just my opinion.

I do have some advice for you. I suggest you talk to me about it, honestly and I suggest you see your dermatologist as frequently as you can. If you have to, call him and if he is seeing a patient leave a messege with the receptionist with any comments or questions you may have. Thats what I do and it does help. Another suggestion I have is that you buy a contour pillow from macys. I just recently bought one. Its a therapeutic pillow which is thirty bucks. I know that is expensive but the pillow cover is really soft and you dont have to put a pillow case on it. It will help not irritate your skin as much. It also helps with neck problems. I can show you a picture of it below.

I hope this helps and now Im gonna tell you my story :)

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We are the same age! Im just a few months younger than you. My birthday is in late April, the 26th. We sound very similar. I dont really believe in God either. I freaking hate the concept of God. If God really existed why would people be depressed all the time and why would they suffer, why would he bring people in the world that dont want to be alive. I mean we didnt ask to be born. Even if I did believe in God, I wouldnt think of God as a human being! Lots of people take God and the bible too literally. Im sorry if this offends anyone here but this is just my opinion.

I feel exactly the same.NO ONE deserves to suffer like most of us do with this disease :naughty:

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thanks for all your replies...it's nice to hear I'm not the only one suffering from this disease...you know I even sometimes understand why my parents just don't understand me. I really don't have (m)any pimples anymore..but all the sideeffects of accutane, the redness and the constant fear another pimple might show up just freaks me out. Or whats worse: That I have to think about this stuff. I would so much enjoy going out, meet girls etc. etc. but I'm a wreck I'm telling you!

The worst thing is that this acne had an effect on my complete self-esteem. I hate my whole body, everything! I even uploaded two pictures to hot or not to see if I'm wrong...but even though both pictures were taken on very good days, from good angles, in good light I've only got a 6.5 and 7.5...this depresses me even more. I just want to like me..I just want to enjoy life because we only have one of it...but how could we do this unless we have a clear skin!

I know 2 people in my class who have worse acne than me...but I'm impressed because they're completely self-confident..I don't know how they do it. If I see a mirror outside my flat, I can't look at it because I only look into some "good" mirrors where I know I don't look too bad.

I'm quite a psycho am I not :( Maybe I should really see someone for help as molly jean suggested :(

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thanks for all your replies...it's nice to hear I'm not the only one suffering from this disease...you know I even sometimes understand why my parents just don't understand me. I really don't have (m)any pimples anymore..but all the sideeffects of accutane, the redness and the constant fear another pimple might show up just freaks me out. Or whats worse: That I have to think about this stuff. I would so much enjoy going out, meet girls etc. etc. but I'm a wreck I'm telling you!

The worst thing is that this acne had an effect on my complete self-esteem. I hate my whole body, everything! I even uploaded two pictures to hot or not to see if I'm wrong...but even though both pictures were taken on very good days, from good angles, in good light I've only got a 6.5 and 7.5...this depresses me even more. I just want to like me..I just want to enjoy life because we only have one of it...but how could we do this unless we have a clear skin!

I know 2 people in my class who have worse acne than me...but I'm impressed because they're completely self-confident..I don't know how they do it. If I see a mirror outside my flat, I can't look at it because I only look into some "good" mirrors where I know I don't look too bad.

I'm quite a psycho am I not :( Maybe I should really see someone for help as molly jean suggested :(

Hm, it was pretty hard for me to read both of your posts as it's basically like reading how I was a year ago. I slipped into serious depression over it. My acne situation hasn't changed, but I've come to terms with the fact that I have it. I haven't shrugged my shoulders of it and accepted it.. I've just come to terms with it.

My parents - my mother especially will always say to me "You're skin is fine." When it's quite clear to see.. that it's not lol. I think they do it to just boost you're confidence. It is so so SO difficult to get people to understand the inner feelings and what acne truly does to you. It's not the physical effects - which is what I think most people regard it as. It goes so much deeper than that, and it's difficult. People who have never had acne will never really understand.

Please don't put yourself in a position that people will be in any way negative towards you - i.e Hot or Not.. it does absolutely nothing for you're self esteem. If that's you in your DP, you look pretty cute ^^; and I feel for you so much, I really do. Don't let acne win. Just take at least a little encouragement that there are lots of people on here willing to help.

Hope everything gets a little brighter, keep you're head up! :]

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wow i didnt realise the reactions of parents were so similar. my mum always says similar stuff to me "its not a real problem" "if your not going out just coz of your skin you need to see a psychiatrist, not a dermatologist"

man, i know your feeling alot of pain... just try to gun through life and get through this bad stage, coz eventually things will improve. focus on things you can control, like your studies, and try not to let it take over your life. but i understand how hard this can be. good luck mate

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Awww Michael : ))

You are a really good looking guy! trust me, I am of the female gender --- we females know!! : ))

C'mon -- blue eyes, blond hair.. those are the rarest and most desirable traits in a person, in North America at least. In Switzerland, your blond hair is just average then : D

People will flood toward you if you act unconcerned about your skin, loosen up.. at least pretend that you are bursting with ego and self esteem.

Think *I AM SO COOL!!! HOLY FRIKKIN' MAN!! WOW!! I AM SO HOT!!!* .. do it !!!

: ))

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I'm sorry-to all of you who have parents that try to trivialize your acne problems.

I guess the good thing about me having to deal with it is that if wither of my girls ever have a problem with it I will be totally sympathetic to their problem.

Things will look up eventually Michael..you are a handsome guy..you just need to surround yourself with people who don't give a flip that you're having problems with your skin.

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Thanks for all your support..today I think my mother really realised how bad I'm actually feeling. However she still tells me that I'm obsessed and she's really worried about me because she thinks I rubbed my face on purpose too hard to wound myself...well maybe she's right..I don't know anymore.

What I just can't stand is the point of no hope! And that's the whole problem at the moment! Before I started accutane I always thought that as soon as I start my low dose treatment life will become great again. Well this was true for 5 months or so. Then I had to increase from 10 to 20mg and it still isn't any better. The skin is much drier and more red but they're are still some 3-5 tiny pimples visibles...maybe others don't see them but I do! I hate them and moreover my oily (at the moment only oily because of the moisterizer) face. I'm 22 and instead of going out, get drunk and enjoy life I don't go to uni anymore, called sick at work the whole last 2 weeks, missed some appointments with friends and am most of the time quite rude with everyone that cares about me because I'm just no happy anymore and I've lost my smile. I hope I'll get to the state of hope again...but at the moment I just think "Well I'm in month 9 of my low dose accutane treatment and I still don't like it..how will it be as soon as I stop in 3 months? I should probably already quit my job to hide forever..."

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Hey Michael,

I think a lot of people on this board know exactly how you feel. Some days my skin can look like complete crap and I just dont care, some days it can look fine and i'll freak out over the tiniest smallest pimple. Completley obssessive, erratic behaviour. The whole ordeal of breaking out again is scary - especially when it takes so long to clear up.

The thing you must remember is that no one else really notices pimples that much on others. If they do see them - they just see it once and forget about it. People with acne tend to obsess over others and check out everyone's skin just to try and be comforted that the is someone else worse off them then. I know because i do it myself!

I dont think professional help is really going to work - unless that person also has acne. It's hard for anyone else who has never experienced it to understand just how hard it is. Even after you have mostly cleared up, it doesnt take away the battering that your self-esteem took during the periods you did have acne. I guess these things take time.

Personally, as a female, I dont really care if a guy has a couple of pimples on his face. It makes no difference to me. I think people who have suffered from acne are far less conceted and have a better understanding of emotions (therefore probably able to relate to women better :) ). The only thing that sucks about people with acne is they have no confidence whatsoever so I guess they always give off the vibe to stay away from them because they dont want people to look at their face - therefore no confidence = no girlfriend/boyfriend!

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I know how you feel , iam dealing with the same problem since forever , and now that iam in college it sucks even more , i see alot of pretty girls with clear skin ofcourse and cute guys and they are all sitting outside enjoying the good weather and knowing each other , when iam like running to class then go straight back home because of my skin , i hate it and specialy for me as a girl its even harder because guys wouldnt really notice me unless i put make up and cover it really well and that takes sometime in the morning which at times i dont feel like doing it

But it sucks more because people dont really understand how we feel and how it would feel to have a shitty face like this and how waking up every morning just to see more pimples on your face and getting to worry more about your whole day and how your going to meet people

I try as much to ignore it and all i can do is try to treat it and just hold on , my skin got alot better than how it used to be a year ago , iam happy with it but still iam sutffering from acne and this is like my tenth year...which pisses me off , even though make up do help alot but i mean..cant i just wake up and put nothing on my face and go out? thats what i want...like everyone else in this world..who doesnt even think about their skin at all , i want to not worry at all about it !

I understand what your going through , sadly others cant because they dont go through it and its horrible , like my sister who is younger than me in few years , she has alot of friends , great social life and she is like out of the house 24/7 or most of the day and night at times , she has mild acne , very mild which it isnt that noticble...few small pimples and big ones at times but it doesnt really look bad at all or even can be called "acne" and she doesnt even cover it up , she doesnt care that much..., she comes to me most of the time telling me how i should get a "life" and go out and meet people....which hurts me alot because of my skin it isnt easy to go out , and even though one time i asked her if her skin was like mine..what would she be feeling like , she said completely depressed ! yet she bitch and tell me to get a life...(but anyways iam the one who is in college studying and working and having money and doing things that will make life easier for me now and later , unlike her she is failing highschool and she doesnt work and she doesnt care much about work or school...so yeah)

But...yeah....i can relate to you story and i think everyone here goes through the same thing...

About going on dates , i havent been on one for God knows when..., its been a long time because my acne used to be even worse than now..so i feel very lonely recently more than ever because iam getting tired of being alone...and not having someone who loves me and cares for me

Anyways...about God , i dont think that because life is like hell or seems like it and us having bad luck with skin , means God isnt really caring about us or helping us , those are small issues that even God can do heal us , and help us pretty much but i cant really tell you why he isnt doing so , but about why our lives are like hell or the world...well just look at it as how most people blame God on how our world is f*cked up , is what making our world like this

I thank God that i dont have bigger problems than acne , like being blind or having a really dangerous disease or illness that there isnt cure for....etc, at least acne isnt a huge issue...comparing to those other ones .

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