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NeverGiveUpOnADream

In Love With A Girl/ Love Struck.

I've gotta be honest.

I've never felt this strong for somebody. Ever.

Before the summer began, we had something incredible. An amazing connection.

Summer began, and a few bumps in the roads made things awkward. She use to call me everyday, and for the entire summer, I never heard from her. I missed her, but I waited for things to settle when school started again in September and take it from there.

September comes and goes, and I find out that she's in love with a new person.

She is emotionally/physically attached to this new guy, and I just feel hopeless.

I've gotta be honest. This new guy, is pretty hard to compete with. He's got looks, wits, passion, and is adored by pretty much every girl that he comes in contact with.

I just feel hopeless. That feeling that what i once had with her, has been given away without her even letting me know. What makes things worse is i'm in that state of mind where i am comparing myself head to toe with this guy and coming up short in every way.

I can't let go of this feeling. I know it's real. But, as lovers sometimes go, sometimes one person holds onto the feelings they once shared and another moves on. But it's so hard because I know that i was at my best when i was with her. I was the happiest i had ever been my entire life. And i can't stop thinking about it.

I'm reaching the point where I am struggling, but will eventually come to the acceptance, that i am chasing the ghost of a good thing.

How do you guys get over things like this?

And yes, I've come across other girls in the past month, but that's just what they are, "other girls." Nothing compares.

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Guest No Pride

The sage says, "When one is in love with someone that holds another attachment, one must get ten numbers from other women, and you will be healed." Nothing compares? Thats because you arent giving any other women a chance. The bonus to this is, if she breaks up with her BF and sees you with other women, she'll come onto you. Its a matter of competition.

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You have to keep your mind on other things. Do things you like. Be with your friends. I know the exact feeling, I sometimes still think of "her". But you just gotto keep focused on other things.

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if a whole summer passed without you hearing from her.....doesnt that sound like writing on the wall? still, that sucks. it sounds like there is not much you can do (since she is in a serious relationship now), except try getting over her and getting on with life.

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i know exactly how it feels, im exactly where you are as well. I've made the same desicion though and hopefully i'll have the strength to pull through, which is to move on, cause ive considered in sleepless nights who i am to her now and what i am to myself, which is vague i know, but its the most solid answer i can achieve through alot of pain believe me.

"eventually come to the acceptance, that i am chasing the ghost of a good thing."

really hit what i was thinking, sorry i guess im no help, im looking for the same answer.

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You could always try joining the scientologists and getting them to kidnap/brainwash her like they did for Tom Cruise. When I was young I was romantically obsessed with cartoon characters. So yeah I'm pretty fucked up in the head... not the guy to ask for mental advice. Still you could always save up about ten grand, and buy a realdoll made to look exactly like her... then dress it up in a catholic schoolgirl outfit and arrange it so she will "accidentally" find it while it is posed in a "compromising" position... while you stand in the corner of the room whispering her name and flaggelating yourself.

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if a whole summer passed without you hearing from her.....doesnt that sound like writing on the wall? still, that sucks. it sounds like there is not much you can do (since she is in a serious relationship now), except try getting over her and getting on with life.

I have to agree.

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if a whole summer passed without you hearing from her.....doesnt that sound like writing on the wall? still, that sucks. it sounds like there is not much you can do (since she is in a serious relationship now), except try getting over her and getting on with life.

i agree, you'll find the right one.

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he'll dump her (horribly and break her heart) and she'll come back to you. sometimes girls need that to know what they really have.

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I've gotta be honest.

I've never felt this strong for somebody. Ever.

Before the summer began, we had something incredible. An amazing connection.

Summer began, and a few bumps in the roads made things awkward. She use to call me everyday, and for the entire summer, I never heard from her. I missed her, but I waited for things to settle when school started again in September and take it from there.

September comes and goes, and I find out that she's in love with a new person.

She is emotionally/physically attached to this new guy, and I just feel hopeless.

I've gotta be honest. This new guy, is pretty hard to compete with. He's got looks, wits, passion, and is adored by pretty much every girl that he comes in contact with.

I just feel hopeless. That feeling that what i once had with her, has been given away without her even letting me know. What makes things worse is i'm in that state of mind where i am comparing myself head to toe with this guy and coming up short in every way.

I can't let go of this feeling. I know it's real. But, as lovers sometimes go, sometimes one person holds onto the feelings they once shared and another moves on. But it's so hard because I know that i was at my best when i was with her. I was the happiest i had ever been my entire life. And i can't stop thinking about it.

I'm reaching the point where I am struggling, but will eventually come to the acceptance, that i am chasing the ghost of a good thing.

How do you guys get over things like this?

And yes, I've come across other girls in the past month, but that's just what they are, "other girls." Nothing compares.

Thats so sad! i feel so sad just reading it... :( you realise that by comparing yourself to the other guy will never do cuz ur view of ur self is so totally warped...also i know this is probably not what u want to hear atm but i think that there are so many people out there that are *right* for us. I dont believe in one soul mate...i used to but as i grew up i realised it is unlikely...i'm sure u are a great guy and there are so many other girls out there that u will be just as happy with. I know how hard it is to let go and how much it hurts when u love someone and they dont love u back but u have to get over that stage of ur life and not let it hold u down because u will find someone else that you'll cherish forever :D

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it just wasnt meant to be. you can't pour your heart into someone who dosent like you the same way. i'm going through the same thing. i like this girl a lot but i dont think she likes me the same way. it sucks but you got to move on.

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That sucks man. Unfortunately that's life and alot of us had to deal with the same thing, that being unrequited love. There's definitely no sure-proof advice that'll make you feel better. For me, it just took time and focusing on other things.

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its a simple case of you getting more attached than your other half, when this happens you will always be in for some pain.

i think i have like so many girls in my life, i never get over them in a sense that i still like each of them them very much. but time takes some of the sharpness out of that pain you got there.

what to do? no nothing, forget her, cuz nothing is gonna come of it. go do something else.

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i've been obsessing about a girl for 3 weeks now. i constantly think about her. we are going to do something together this week but its for "fun" and not a date. it sucks but i guess i'll just be nice to her without seeming to aggressive in my pursuit of her. maybe then we could develop a friendship which may in the future lead to romance :D. or maybe i'm just dreaming. im not sure what to do.

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i've been obsessing about a girl for 3 weeks now. i constantly think about her. we are going to do something together this week but its for "fun" and not a date. it sucks but i guess i'll just be nice to her without seeming to aggressive in my pursuit of her. maybe then we could develop a friendship which may in the future lead to romance :D. or maybe i'm just dreaming. im not sure what to do.

Back when I was taking psych I learned that there are actual "rules of attraction".

someone will fall deep in infatuation with you if...

1. the obvious one, there is physical attraction

2. proximity

3. you can make them laugh

4. you can make them feel good about themself

5. they know they make you feel good about yourself

fill the 5 requirements and you're in.

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Guest No Pride

i've been obsessing about a girl for 3 weeks now. i constantly think about her. we are going to do something together this week but its for "fun" and not a date. it sucks but i guess i'll just be nice to her without seeming to aggressive in my pursuit of her. maybe then we could develop a friendship which may in the future lead to romance :D. or maybe i'm just dreaming. im not sure what to do.

Back when I was taking psych I learned that there are actual "rules of attraction".

someone will fall deep in infatuation with you if...

1. the obvious one, there is physical attraction

2. proximity

3. you can make them laugh

4. you can make them feel good about themself

5. they know they make you feel good about yourself

fill the 5 requirements and you're in.

Kitty, I like ya, but that is the worst advice and I'm surprised a psychology book would print falsehoods. Lets leave this to biology.

Guys listen up. In the animal kingdom there are songs, movements and communication that can trigger chemicals inside the females body that lead to her wanting to mate. Alpha males make up 85% of matings in most animal groups. Acting like an alpha male triggers those chemicals. Its that way for all animals. And its the same for humans. Powerful attraction in humans comes from deep confidence and good humor as well as chivalry since I think we all want to be nice guys. Confidence and humor mixed will make her literally get wet with emotion. Thats if she plays along and is having a good time. Each woman is different but the premise is the same. You wont get her if you play nice. You wont get her if you ask her boring questions about her life to try and get in her pants. You wont get her by playing the victim. Women will test you by sometimes throwing fits to see how you react. If you bust her balls, you are in. If you act sorry and worried, you are a friend. Shes trying to see if you really are confident or if you are faking it. She wants a real man, after all.

I'll give ya a hint.

I dated a girl a few months ago. I called her and told her we should go get some coffee or tea and chat at a local coffee shop. She said, where are we going afterwards? I said "Afterwards? You're just trying to get into my pants arent you?" "Look, we can go back to my place afterwards, but no touching, ok?"

Beautiful women never hear these things, but it gets those chemicals going. Turns out we didnt have much in common though.

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Kitty, I like ya, but that is the worst advice and I'm surprised a psychology book would print falsehoods. Lets leave this to biology.

Guys listen up. In the animal kingdom there are songs, movements and communication that can trigger chemicals inside the females body that lead to her wanting to mate. Alpha males make up 85% of matings in most animal groups. Acting like an alpha male triggers those chemicals. Its that way for all animals. And its the same for humans. Powerful attraction in humans comes from deep confidence and good humor as well as chivalry since I think we all want to be nice guys. Confidence and humor mixed will make her literally get wet with emotion. Thats if she plays along and is having a good time. Each woman is different but the premise is the same. You wont get her if you play nice. You wont get her if you ask her boring questions about her life to try and get in her pants. You wont get her by playing the victim. Women will test you by sometimes throwing fits to see how you react. If you bust her balls, you are in. If you act sorry and worried, you are a friend. Shes trying to see if you really are confident or if you are faking it. She wants a real man, after all.

I'll give ya a hint.

I dated a girl a few months ago. I called her and told her we should go get some coffee or tea and chat at a local coffee shop. She said, where are we going afterwards? I said "Afterwards? You're just trying to get into my pants arent you?" "Look, we can go back to my place afterwards, but no touching, ok?"

Beautiful women never hear these things, but it gets those chemicals going. Turns out we didnt have much in common though.

Giant chunks of science become outdated. Pluto is no longer a planet. I think the rules of attraction are actually kind of accurate, though. It's obvious stuff. Though, I will admit women (like men) generally like a challenge. Which probably explains why so many girls are such suckers for musicians. And "busting her balls" could also get you stuck in friendship land. Ladies like to be treated as such, especially from an unexpected source. I dated this one guy for a while. He had a reputation for being kind of arrogant and a womanizer. I had my doubts but he always treated me respectfully. That ended because I discovered he had that reputation for a reason.

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Guest No Pride

Kitty, I like ya, but that is the worst advice and I'm surprised a psychology book would print falsehoods. Lets leave this to biology.

Guys listen up. In the animal kingdom there are songs, movements and communication that can trigger chemicals inside the females body that lead to her wanting to mate. Alpha males make up 85% of matings in most animal groups. Acting like an alpha male triggers those chemicals. Its that way for all animals. And its the same for humans. Powerful attraction in humans comes from deep confidence and good humor as well as chivalry since I think we all want to be nice guys. Confidence and humor mixed will make her literally get wet with emotion. Thats if she plays along and is having a good time. Each woman is different but the premise is the same. You wont get her if you play nice. You wont get her if you ask her boring questions about her life to try and get in her pants. You wont get her by playing the victim. Women will test you by sometimes throwing fits to see how you react. If you bust her balls, you are in. If you act sorry and worried, you are a friend. Shes trying to see if you really are confident or if you are faking it. She wants a real man, after all.

I'll give ya a hint.

I dated a girl a few months ago. I called her and told her we should go get some coffee or tea and chat at a local coffee shop. She said, where are we going afterwards? I said "Afterwards? You're just trying to get into my pants arent you?" "Look, we can go back to my place afterwards, but no touching, ok?"

Beautiful women never hear these things, but it gets those chemicals going. Turns out we didnt have much in common though.

Giant chunks of science become outdated. Pluto is no longer a planet. I think the rules of attraction are actually kind of accurate, though. It's obvious stuff. Though, I will admit women (like men) generally like a challenge. Which probably explains why so many girls are such suckers for musicians. And "busting her balls" could also get you stuck in friendship land. Ladies like to be treated as such, especially from an unexpected source. I dated this one guy for a while. He had a reputation for being kind of arrogant and a womanizer. I had my doubts but he always treated me respectfully. That ended because I discovered he had that reputation for a reason.

Oh yes, ladies deserve to be treated like ladies. Men should be nice in their actions, but have to be able to not put up with bad behavior and that requires ball-busting.

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i've been obsessing about a girl for 3 weeks now. i constantly think about her. we are going to do something together this week but its for "fun" and not a date. it sucks but i guess i'll just be nice to her without seeming to aggressive in my pursuit of her. maybe then we could develop a friendship which may in the future lead to romance :D. or maybe i'm just dreaming. im not sure what to do.

Back when I was taking psych I learned that there are actual "rules of attraction".

someone will fall deep in infatuation with you if...

1. the obvious one, there is physical attraction

2. proximity

3. you can make them laugh

4. you can make them feel good about themself

5. they know they make you feel good about yourself

fill the 5 requirements and you're in.

Nah this how it works, at least for women:

Womens rating system:

50% Money/power

10% Things women say they care about but don't (intelligence, sense of humor, honesty, sensitivity etc)

40% Attraction

Those 40% of attraction is:

50% physical attraction

20% competition

20% novelty

10% other

http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html

:)

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Nah this how it works, at least for women:

Womens rating system:

50% Money/power

10% Things women say they care about but don't (intelligence, sense of humor, honesty, sensitivity etc)

40% Attraction

Those 40% of attraction is:

50% physical attraction

20% competition

20% novelty

10% other

http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html

:)

I guess I'm in the minority. I almost always date musicians, who generally have no power and even less money. Physical attraction does count for something, but not much. The last guy I was really into I met at a bar (surprise surprise, right?), I was with a couple. Which is not something I'd normally do, especially if it's a new couple, that's just boring. Being bored, I went outside sat down just anywhere, which happened to be next to this rather unassuming looking guy and his group of friends. One of them said something amusing so I smiled and the guy that said it asked me a question. I went back inside to check on my friends. Still boring. Went back outside. "She's back!" they said. Which made it pretty clear to me that they aren't used to cute girls not ignoring them. Something like an hour later my friends came out because they wanted to leave (we were seeing a band later that night). I gave my number to the guy next to me. Why? Because he was sweet and funny and I was immediately at ease with him. My friend's boyfriend whispered to my friend "she could have any guy in here, what's she doing with that?" So judging from his reaction, I think you could say this guy I was interested in isn't your typical "hot guy". But I thought he was adorable. See what I'm saying?

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Nah this how it works, at least for women:

Womens rating system:

50% Money/power

10% Things women say they care about but don't (intelligence, sense of humor, honesty, sensitivity etc)

40% Attraction

Those 40% of attraction is:

50% physical attraction

20% competition

20% novelty

10% other

http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html

:)

I guess I'm in the minority. I almost always date musicians, who generally have no power and even less money. Physical attraction does count for something, but not much. The last guy I was really into I met at a bar (surprise surprise, right?), I was with a couple. Which is not something I'd normally do, especially if it's a new couple, that's just boring. Being bored, I went outside sat down just anywhere, which happened to be next to this rather unassuming looking guy and his group of friends. One of them said something amusing so I smiled and the guy that said it asked me a question. I went back inside to check on my friends. Still boring. Went back outside. "She's back!" they said. Which made it pretty clear to me that they aren't used to cute girls not ignoring them. Something like an hour later my friends came out because they wanted to leave (we were seeing a band later that night). I gave my number to the guy next to me. Why? Because he was sweet and funny and I was immediately at ease with him. My friend's boyfriend whispered to my friend "she could have any guy in here, what's she doing with that?" So judging from his reaction, I think you could say this guy I was interested in isn't your typical "hot guy". But I thought he was adorable. See what I'm saying?

Well... musicians have novelty and if they are attractive it's possible there is other girls competing for them, at least you have filled in much of the attraction part. Money/power is related to age, younger girls have diffrent definitions of what a 30 year old woman would consider alot money. But I'm probably too scared of girls for my own good anyhow :)

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