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InRepair

After so many years...

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Its amazing to me that so many people can feel the same way about having acne, and about how it can effect there life. I didn’t realize how many people were just feeling the same till I came here, I knew there had to be other people who felt the same as me but to read it, its much different. I don’t even know what its like to have self confident in myself and about how to talk to people without feeling like they are looking at me and thinking “my god her face looks bad�.

I think at I’m at the point in my life, where I just turned 21 and I’m just tired, plain tired of everyday waking up and the first time I think of is, I can’t go to work cause I don’t want to look at anyone. After a while your mine is just so dead, and it shuts off with having any real emotional connections with anyone cause you feel like you can’t say anything or do anything without in the back of your head being all paranoid that people are judging you.

I’ve suffered from acne since I was in middle school, and never got treatment till I got into college 3 years ago and I started using proactiv. It worked for a year or two but now its not working anymore and for awhile earlier in this year I was majorly depressed and didn’t want to leave my room. Every time I looked at someone who had nice skin I just wanted to die, all I wish is that these breakouts would stop and my scares would go away. I’m sick of my entire day of living, is focus on just some stupid breakouts, that my entire life is controlled by what’s on my face. In recent years I’ve really come out of myself and I’m not as shy as I use to be, but I’m still not happy with myself and how I look. Its sucks even more I have a huge thing with people taking pictures of me, you honestly have to force me to get into a picture cause I am so terrified of how I look, a friend of mine tried taking a picture of me with her camera, that didn’t go over so well, to not be a afraid of having my picture taken would be the greatest thing ever(beside not breaking out) to enjoy being in pictures would be a gift.

There would be some days were I was so mad at myself for everything I am, I wonder do I have low self esteem and confident cause of my acne? Or is it something else, and I realize that maybe if I had gotten help when I was younger maybe it wouldn’t have been so bad, but I can’t focus on the past only the future.

I’ve never had real relationships with people, it wasn’t till this year that I started to actually have a real social life, going out with friends..etc which is why now I wanna do something about my face. Its not HORRIBLE but come on, breaking out everyday, and having those scares, its only a matter of time till you just say ok that’s enough I have to do something NOW.

I dunno there is a million things more I could say but reading most of the threads in this section, most of you guys have said the things, its nice to know that more people feel as bad as me about it, and to know I’m not the only person who should feel ashamed.

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Agreed, and you're DEFINATELY not alone on alot of the points you braught up. Don't worry bro, just keep fighting it! Remember, acne has to be 'controlled' ... it wont' go away on it's onw

anyways, best of luck to you, and hopefully everything falls in place for you.

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