Jump to content
Acne.org
Search In
Find results that contain...
Find results in...

I barely ever go out and experience the "nightlife" in my city, mostly due to my acne but also because I'm usually studying my butt off. So my friend invites me to go out Saturday night and for some crazy reason I agree to go :wacko: . I mean, I still have quite a few active cysts right now but my acne is a lot more under control than it has been... So I figure I could just put on a little makeup and go out and have fun without letting my acne get me down for once in my life...Big mistake :doh:

So we end up at a small club/bar by the beach that's pretty crowded and eventually manage to get some drinks...My friend points out that there's a guy standing nearby who is staring at me/checking me out. :rolleyes: I roll my eyes and say whatever, but it still does feel kinda good to think someone might actually be checking me out :dance: . Well after a while my friend suggests we should go to a different bar so we get up to leave. Out of the corner of my eye I see the guy that was staring walking towards us. :shifty: He walks right up in my face smiling, and then his expression suddenly changes.... and he says "Oh hell no!" and turns around and walks away laughing :evil: ...My friend asks me "what the hell was that about" and I say "I don't know, whatever, let's get out of here." :redface: But of course I knew exactly what that was all about, and it confirmed something that I know deep down but don't want to admit to myself -- that people think I'm good looking from far away, but up close my attractiveness level goes down to a -2 because of my acne. :cry:

So my night was pretty much ruined after that.. :( And what pisses me off the most is that this guy wasn't even that good looking, just average at best. But I always notice that a lot of people think just because they gave good skin, it means they're as hot as freakin Brad Pitt and have the right to insult someone else on their looks. :rolleyes: Has anyone had an experience like this where you went out thinking you actually look decent and had someone basically crush your self-esteem with one simple remark? (Sigh) let's just say it'll be back to Friday and Saturday nights on the couch for me for a while.. :wall:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dam that really sucks, shouldnt let piece of shit put you down like that anyway, you shouldn’t be upset after all you went out to go have some fun with your mates not to pick up so.. dont worry your self confidence will come back with vengeance.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Not exactly the same as your experience, but one day I went out with my friends to the cinema, and one of my friends brought along her digital camera. I thought my spots wouldn't be visible because I had quite a good foundation on, which usually hides all my red marks.

Then later, when she sent me the pictures on MSN, it was horrible because I could see every little spot clearly and all I could think was "I've been walking around like that all day!"

Don't worry about what the guy said, he obviously doesn't deserve you if he couldn't appreciate your real beauty behind the acne.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

so basically he had no good intentions, to become good friends or anything like that, he just wanted mmm yeah that :) glad acne keeps certain ppl away. you are way better w/o company like that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

life sucks then you die. Thats my advice sweetie

Guys can be such pricks, but you can expect that at clubs where most guys are after one thing and one thing only. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I dont mean to be rude but you have to sometimes understand and see from their perspective as well.If you had flawless skin and saw people with skin problems you wouldnt prob also go out with him and feel pity for him etc.. they would also understand they way we all do here if only those clear skin people would have problems like us

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I barely ever go out and experience the "nightlife" in my city, mostly due to my acne but also because I'm usually studying my butt off. So my friend invites me to go out Saturday night and for some crazy reason I agree to go :wacko: . I mean, I still have quite a few active cysts right now but my acne is a lot more under control than it has been... So I figure I could just put on a little makeup and go out and have fun without letting my acne get me down for once in my life...Big mistake :doh:

So we end up at a small club/bar by the beach that's pretty crowded and eventually manage to get some drinks...My friend points out that there's a guy standing nearby who is staring at me/checking me out. :rolleyes: I roll my eyes and say whatever, but it still does feel kinda good to think someone might actually be checking me out :dance: . Well after a while my friend suggests we should go to a different bar so we get up to leave. Out of the corner of my eye I see the guy that was staring walking towards us. :shifty: He walks right up in my face smiling, and then his expression suddenly changes.... and he says "Oh hell no!" and turns around and walks away laughing :evil: ...My friend asks me "what the hell was that about" and I say "I don't know, whatever, let's get out of here." :redface: But of course I knew exactly what that was all about, and it confirmed something that I know deep down but don't want to admit to myself -- that people think I'm good looking from far away, but up close my attractiveness level goes down to a -2 because of my acne. :cry:

I COMPLETELY know what you mean.

100% same with me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I barely ever go out and experience the "nightlife" in my city, mostly due to my acne but also because I'm usually studying my butt off. So my friend invites me to go out Saturday night and for some crazy reason I agree to go :wacko: . I mean, I still have quite a few active cysts right now but my acne is a lot more under control than it has been... So I figure I could just put on a little makeup and go out and have fun without letting my acne get me down for once in my life...Big mistake :doh:

So we end up at a small club/bar by the beach that's pretty crowded and eventually manage to get some drinks...My friend points out that there's a guy standing nearby who is staring at me/checking me out. :rolleyes: I roll my eyes and say whatever, but it still does feel kinda good to think someone might actually be checking me out :dance: . Well after a while my friend suggests we should go to a different bar so we get up to leave. Out of the corner of my eye I see the guy that was staring walking towards us. :shifty: He walks right up in my face smiling, and then his expression suddenly changes.... and he says "Oh hell no!" and turns around and walks away laughing :evil: ...My friend asks me "what the hell was that about" and I say "I don't know, whatever, let's get out of here." :redface: But of course I knew exactly what that was all about, and it confirmed something that I know deep down but don't want to admit to myself -- that people think I'm good looking from far away, but up close my attractiveness level goes down to a -2 because of my acne. :cry:

Just think about this: nothing about you will be considered pretty by 100% of people

We think of beauty as objective and yet you will never find someone who is considered beuaitufl/handsome by 100% of people. You mentioned Brad Pitt and I know girls who consider him ugly and don't like him at all ... it's their right. I know people who are ridicules for how they look by some and complimented on how beautiful they are by others. Just like there are guys who may not like your acne and may be brainless assholes it doesn't meant that you face is ugly if you have acne.

There are many people in this world that will find you acceptable with acne, others that will not see a single flaw because because they love the person you are too much and others again that may find you attractive with acne. Whatever applies to your body usually applies to your body with acne: you can't generalize about your look because of a guy and a guy alone, you're gorgeous the way you are right now to many ... and even when you'll have conquered acne ... you won't be liked by 100% of people because that never happens to everyone even to those stars who get 100.000 letters every day

Also do you really care for the opinion or company of such shallow and idiotic individual?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Also do you really care for the opinion or company of such shallow and idiotic individual?

She shouldn't care, but it is normal to be hurt by what this guy said. I remember when my friend's white trash, unemployed, cocaine addict boyfriend called me gross when I experienced a break-out. I had zero respect for this guy, but it still hurt.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Also do you really care for the opinion or company of such shallow and idiotic individual?

She shouldn't care, but it is normal to be hurt by what this guy said. I remember when my friend's white trash, unemployed, cocaine addict boyfriend called me gross when I experienced a break-out. I had zero respect for this guy, but it still hurt.

Yes the instinctive reaction is feeling hurt ... that's how I feel too when I'm insulted by people I don't care for

But then, when the first reaction is over, we can rationalize what happened and we must realize that that insult is absolutely irrelevant and can't kill our self-confidence of playing havoc with our life ... no one can allow a strange people he/she will never see anymore to ruin your confidence and mood

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I completely understand how you feel. I've had some similar experiences myself.

Not to long ago I was walking to work and these two guys behind me were whistling at me. They eventually caught up to me while I was waiting for the light to change and they actually said "ew" when they saw me up close. That hurt.

Then another time I was walking past this group of guys and they said "damn" when they say me (I'm assuming in a negative way).

And this one's the kicker: I was serving lunch at a homeless shelter and this homeless guy was smiling at me as I walked up to the table. He said something to the woman sitting beside him and when I walked up to serve them their meals she said "ewww her face is all pimply." Geeeez and there I was volunteering...that one really sucked

These experiences hurt a lot because they too confirm my fears. I wish I could say how bad I look was all in my head but clearly that is not the case.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

when i was about 18 when i had SEVERE acne i was working at the checkouts at the supermarket and well here were a few things that happened.

1) I had some old lady (she was mentalling disabled i think) shout out "YOUR THE UGLIEST MAN I EVER SEEN" the woman with her said dont be rude. I felt so crap, especially since there were loads of people around when she said it. I just smiled and continued.

2) two people in the same day spoke to me about my acne, one said to goto a dermatologist but they said it in a nice way (apparently someone they knew had acne still at 28... only a couple years away from me now..) and this other guy just started speaking that he had it when he was younger or something. It was weird cos no one really even said anything to me about it before. Still, this is what made me goto a derm.

3) I had a huge cyst on my cheak i didnt think it was that bad but i went to work and this group of lads came through the checkout "i bet you get all the ladies" and crap like that. Again i just laughed but pissed me off.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Aw, poor dear, i totally sympathise with you. I hate it when people just crush your confidence like that.

I know it's nothing absolutely reassuring, but at least he thought you were pretty/hot without coming really really close to you to see your skin. I mean, no offence, but people who are ugly, nomatter how perfect their skin is, will still be ugly. You are you... just let your personality shine...!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

recently i was at a concert in a park(outdoors and stuff) and there was a band playing and it was getting late and stuff. some drunk man kept coming up to me and shouting out i was beautiful especially when i smile(i was like hey, he's pissed as, but at least its a compliment) and then a boy my age turns round from behind me. grabs my arm and looks into my face and then grins and pats me on my arm and walks off. i tried to shake it off cos id seen him earlier on and he'd been dancing like a prat and had nearly got beaten up by some womens husband for bumping into her, he looked stoned or drunk or something. but it still bothered me. cos i cud tell he'd patted me on the arm and grinned cos when he looked close up i was an ugly spoty face :(

however u just got to rise above it. acne filters out real jerks u wudnt wanna get with anyway. u'll be laffing in his face one day

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

dude I totally get what ur going through, my whole school looekd at me when my acne finally went to the worst possible level(LAST YEAR) when I was 16/17 my acne became horrible due to me using some cream a believe and everyone just kept saying what happened to my skin =/ and then people give me a nasty looking face. stare at me laugh gah it's not funny. and yeah it does hurt. especially when people tell me that i have a lot of acne and ask if I ever tried using acne lotions or something and that REALLY hurt. ah well. it's odd though I actually didn't care about going out(it was the people LOOKING at me that got me all paranoid)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Personalized Advice Quiz - All of Acne.org in just a few minutes


×