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Lets face it people we live in a very superficial world. It used to be survival of the strongest. Now its survival of the prettiest. I have bad skin thanks to six years of acne and acne meds. If God came to me and said Alright you can have your face back the way it was before you got this shit but at the cost of your immediate family. Im sorry to say that i probably would sacrafice my family to have my face back. Thats how deeply this disease has affected me. Its completely ruined my life. And id give anything to be the normal happy sociable kid that I used to be. Not some 20 year old smuck with 2 friends a shitty job and basically no hope.

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no but it was enough to change me both on the outside and on the inside. When i was a little kid (0-16) I thought i was one of the happiest people on the planet. There was nothing particularly great about my life i wasnt rich (im still not) I wasnt particularly popular or athletic or anything. I was just an average kid but i was pefectly content being that way. Ever since I got acne things have just been downhill. I hardly have any friends anymore i rarely go out, I havent gottent any in almost four years. I work at shitty job. And I can say that truthfully im not disfigured or anything. But this just wasnt for me. Never in a million years would i have expected to get acne. I never had any health problems, both sides of my family everyone has tremendous skin, I never in a million years thought my life was gonna be reduced to this. I hate going out in public thinking people are giving me looks. I hate not feeling comfortable talking face to face with someone. I hate not wanting to go out in the daylight because we all know how unforgiving sunlight is. I hate thinking that prospective employers are more likely to hire a nicer looking person. I hate looking 10 years older than I actually am. Am i being weak yea sure. Something i can deal with though and deal with much better than other people. This wasnt one of those things. In summary acne sucked the life outta me.

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Guest save_me

Damn it actually feels like im reading my own thoughts. Whats happened to me, i still cant come to terms with. man i miss my old life so much (until 16). I was so at peace, just a happy kid. Not too sound conceited (like it fukin matters noiw) but i was attractive fukin guy. My present is so shitty. man o man. All i can do i look back on a past i had and try to make that past in my mind, like its 'my present' However crazy that sounds. But then i get out of reality and find out this is who i am and ive changed.

Whenver i look back at my past and think of the couple of hot gfs i had (like it fukin mattered having them at 13), the attention i got and then compare to the sad state of a human being ive turned into now, it sends me to near tears.

It hurts. 4 years of hell its been. I never thought during that time, that id become this. How did this happen?! I just want to get out of here. This place im stuck in. This prison. Prisoner of my own body.

Like you i hold onto hope though, that maybe id get rid of this disfiguring disease. That was it it. A disfigurement. Im disfigured. People stare at me like 'what the fuk'. Ah how i hate all those stares. And how those starres used to be for different reasons. I strongly though do belive i can make it and reach the light. Im only 20 and still can sort whats happened to me.

You know watch a movie called Vanilla Sky. I feel like that movie is made for me. Im a slightly different story and a younger victim.

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Damn it actually feels like im reading my own thoughts. Whats happened to me, i still cant come to terms with. man i miss my old life so much (until 16). I was so at peace, just a happy kid. Not too sound conceited (like it fukin matters noiw) but i was attractive fukin guy. My present is so shitty. man o man. All i can do i look back on a past i had and try to make that past in my mind, like its 'my present' However crazy that sounds. But then i get out of reality and find out this is who i am and ive changed.

Whenver i look back at my past and think of the couple of hot gfs i had (like it fukin mattered having them at 13), the attention i got and then compare to the sad state of a human being ive turned into now, it sends me to near tears.

It hurts. 4 years of hell its been. I never thought during that time, that id become this. How did this happen?! I just want to get out of here. This place im stuck in. This prison. Prisoner of my own body.

Like you i hold onto hope though, that maybe id get rid of this disfiguring disease. That was it it. A disfigurement. Im disfigured. People stare at me like 'what the fuk'. Ah how i hate all those stares. And how those starres used to be for different reasons. I strongly though do belive i can make it and reach the light. Im only 20 and still can sort whats happened to me.

You know watch a movie called Vanilla Sky. I feel like that movie is made for me. Im a slightly different story and a younger victim.

Yeah, but I think Tom Cruise still looked better than me...lol.

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mannn, do i kno how both of you feel. never have i ever really had acne before this year. yes, i would obsess over ONE pimple here or there, but that was the extent of my acne since i was mainly clear. Then, when college started and i got this sudden god-knows-what acne attack, i felt like my life was turned upside down. i realize how much i took for granted with my clear skin. im not sure exactly what i had, perhaps it was acne congloblata, but its was BEYOND deforming at the time. Now even tho the acne is long gone, im slowly realizing that my skin may never quite be the same again. i still have marks that have to heal and fade, and i dont kno how the final result will look, but all in all its such a depressing mind game to realize ur skin may be permanently altered . i kno there r treatments available, and so far the scars i can see r rather shallow, but it still fucking sucks when u think back to a time when u never had to deal with any of it. sometimes i wonder if i've made out my skin to be worse than it actually is, or to the contrary, if i havent accepted the reality of how cruddy my skin has really come to be! like maybe im in denial, and i dont even know it!

its so crazy when something like this happens so suddenly, and completely messes up ur life. in my case, my first year at college, which i almost failed by the way, and many friendships which i have sabotaged because of my insecurity with my skin. and basically how i dont like going out or have much of a life nemore. that's why i feel for tom cruise in vanilla sky too haha. AHH i cant even think about it.. like sometimes life now feels so unreal, like a dream., or nightmare rather haha. like how the hell did this happen to me?? when i see friends from highskool who havent seen me since last year, i KNO they are thinking, "omg.. what happend to her face.. that is so sad, how does she live looking like that" and it really just pisses me off, bc i hate feeling like some kind of pity case. like, now my close friends finally decide to tell me how jealous they all were of my looks bla bla.. its like now that my skin is whack, they can finally confess to me what they actaully thought.. and im like whattttt.. you thought i was that beautiful? why didnt i notice it before?? and it pisses me off even more because i wonder if i'll ever look that good again and be able to finally enjoy it.. not that itll make me any happier, but i dunno, it just sucks to think abt "what could've been" or how i coulve looked if my skin were better.. i mean, i dont have unrealistic expectations nemore, i just want my skin to look DECENt.. and hopefully not disfigured. because i kno ultimately, ill appreciate decent looking skin much more than i have ever appreciated flawless skin..

ok soryyyyyyy for rambling.. but i want to end this by saying. even tho whatever we r going thru mite seem like a big deal to us rite now, im sure that in time we'll realize its not as catastrophic as it may seem? i mean, life does go on, we've survived things before, why shouldn't this be any different?

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Right with you guys.

When I had bad acne at 15 or so, I figured I'd grow out of it cuz my older brother's did. . . So I always held onto hope. (it started in 5th grade, btw)

I figured when I was 18 it'd go away. . . It didn't.

Then I thought, well, at least by 20. . . it didn't.

I'm 22 now, and I do believe I'm finally getting clear. So hang in there guys, most of us are growing (or, hormonally imbalanced) until the age of 23-25. . . don't let it get you so down that you miss out on learning and growing in other ways.

You'll get through it. You WILL. Don't lose yourself to it.

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Kat i fear as time goes on we might come to the realization that it was MORE catostaphic than we thought it would be. Im fearing that I may never meet anyone that i might be alone one day. That im gonna be stuck working some shit job because I cant FACE going to college. Not to be vain but i was a wicked cute looking kid durring my early teen years. When I was fifteen id go places and id be getting attention from girls aged 12-19 not that i was interested in twelve year old girls but i must say it was an ego booster. Now i don't get shit. The thinking about what could have been is waht really drove me nuts for a while. Ive learned to block those thoughts outta my head. I do this by thinking about the really bad times that I had been through. I think to myself considering how bad it axctually was at one point I should perhaps consider myself lucky that its not worse. And about the whole Am I in denial or Am I blowing things out of proportion comment I know exactly what you mean. Im almost 21 now and im still not 100% sure of what It actually is. Cuz if you think about it we cant actually see ourselves the way other people see us. All we have is reflections that look different at every angle and every lighting. Sometimes ill look in the mirror and see someone that looks like a movie star looking back at me. Then Ill also look in another mirror and think jesus christ how do I even leave the house every day. I just want to reach my maximium healing. I think when i reach this point that then ill be able to finally know who I am..

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You would sacrifice your family for clean skin? Fucking retards like you need to live in somewhere like Lebanon to find real values in life.

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You would sacrifice your family for clean skin? Fucking retards like you need to live in somewhere like Lebanon to find real values in life.

Agreed. Or go to a medical clinic in Iraq and see what "fucked up" is really like when you see people with limbs lost, skin burned off, and wounds all over their body.

:naughty:

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You would sacrifice your family for clean skin? Fucking retards like you need to live in somewhere like Lebanon to find real values in life.

Like Islamic terrorism that plagues every corner of the middle east? Even though it's wrong I can imagine wanting to sacrifice other people to cure my acne if it ever got really bad..

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veb jeb,

"i fear as time goes on we might come to the realization that it was MORE catostaphic than we thought it would be." now THAT is a sCARY thought.. and i strongly hope that is NOT the case.. i am willing to go to great lengths to ensure that that does not happen.

rest assured, i really do not believe that you will end up alone! what sort of nonsense is that? if you are as cute as u sound, then im sure ur attractiveness is still shining through regardless of the condition of your skin. and neway, ur skin has to get better eventually, acne is only temporary. worst case scenario: u will b left with scars, but so what? guys can get away with it, trustttttt meeee. therefore, its only a matter of time until u find someone, and not some life-long curse as u make it out to be.

"Im almost 21 now and im still not 100% sure of what It actually is. Cuz if you think about it we cant actually see ourselves the way other people see us. All we have is reflections that look different at every angle and every lighting. Sometimes ill look in the mirror and see someone that looks like a movie star looking back at me. Then Ill also look in another mirror and think jesus christ how do I even leave the house every day. "

^^i feel the SAME way!!!!! AHHHHH sucks doesnt it.. i guess one of the only ways to truly kno how u look is to video tape urself in diff lighting? to be honest, id rather not kno as of rite now.. like they say ignorance is bliss.. however, eventually id love to know FOR SURE that my skin looks decent from ANY angle..

about knowing who you are.. thats not gonna change once ur skin improves..it doesnt work that way.. its not like "POOF your skin is clear, and now you are finally free to become yourself" if nething, i feel like i kno more about who i am now, than before when i had a nearly perfect complexion and that is no lie

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I dont even care about gettin my old face back.. Cause my old face back wouldn't even do shit for me. Its pretty ironic that on top of everything else i can't even get a decent shave anymore lol. I dont know how'd you'd give up your immediate family for a clear face though, thats pretty sad. I'd rather take a gamble wit my life to get a clear face then give up my family (even though they really suck alot of times)

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as someone who has acne i have to say stop feeling so sorry for yourself. there are wrose things out there and you have nothing to gain by wallowing in self pity. not everyone cares about acne, if people don't like you it's probably because you're so miserable & not because of your skin.

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Guest No Pride

as someone who has acne i have to say stop feeling so sorry for yourself. there are wrose things out there and you have nothing to gain by wallowing in self pity. not everyone cares about acne, if people don't like you it's probably because you're so miserable & not because of your skin.

I agree. In America and the west its survival of the prettiest/sexiest but in most of the rest of the world its survival of who can stay alive. Ive seen things, pictures and IRL, that are worse then anything you would ever see on an acne 'victim'. Even in America there are women and girls who have alopecia that takes all the hair off their head and face. Would they sacrifice their families to have hair back? Its difficult to accept going out because most of who we see out are regular people with no problems and I know that. Mainly because people like us stay home most of the time. Fight it. If you dont like your genetics then dont reproduce but accept you life and move on. Do what you want to do and have fun. Dont waste probably the only life you will have on wallowing in self pity.

You arent the average guy. Im not the average guy. You say it sucks looking 10 years older then you are. I get humiliated all the time because I look 6 years younger than I really am. I get jaw drops whenever I go to a bar with friends. So what? We are living the good life and there are really good people out there. Smile and push yourself, you'll be amazed.

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Lets face it people we live in a very superficial world. It used to be survival of the strongest. Now its survival of the prettiest. I have bad skin thanks to six years of acne and acne meds. If God came to me and said Alright you can have your face back the way it was before you got this shit but at the cost of your immediate family. Im sorry to say that i probably would sacrafice my family to have my face back. Thats how deeply this disease has affected me. Its completely ruined my life. And id give anything to be the normal happy sociable kid that I used to be. Not some 20 year old smuck with 2 friends a shitty job and basically no hope.

Tell me something I don't already know.

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If you dont like your genetics then dont reproduce but accept you life and move on.

Hahaha Don't reproduce. That was funny. :D

Anyways, I also feel like Tom cruise character(David) in Vanilla Sky. Funny how many of us identify w/ that. The good old days when our face was either acne or scar free. Anyways, one of the best movies ever. :thumbsup:

Also If we are all so self councious about our scars maybe we should consider dating people w/ scars/acne. I don't know just a thougtht. Maybe I can set up www.scarmatch.com or www.acnematch.com

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You would sacrifice your family for clean skin? Fucking retards like you need to live in somewhere like Lebanon to find real values in life.

Like Islamic terrorism that plagues every corner of the middle east? Even though it's wrong I can imagine wanting to sacrifice other people to cure my acne if it ever got really bad..

Every corner? I doubt you even know where the Middle East is. Educate yourself.

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If you dont like your genetics then dont reproduce but accept you life and move on.

Hahaha Don't reproduce. That was funny. :D

Anyways, I also feel like Tom cruise character(David) in Vanilla Sky. Funny how many of us identify w/ that. The good old days when our face was either acne or scar free. Anyways, one of the best movies ever. :thumbsup:

Also If we are all so self councious about our scars maybe we should consider dating people w/ scars/acne. I don't know just a thougtht. Maybe I can set up www.scarmatch.com or www.acnematch.com

Uglydating.com would be a great site name

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Lets face it people we live in a very superficial world. It used to be survival of the strongest. Now its survival of the prettiest. I have bad skin thanks to six years of acne and acne meds. If God came to me and said Alright you can have your face back the way it was before you got this shit but at the cost of your immediate family. Im sorry to say that i probably would sacrafice my family to have my face back. Thats how deeply this disease has affected me. Its completely ruined my life. And id give anything to be the normal happy sociable kid that I used to be. Not some 20 year old smuck with 2 friends a shitty job and basically no hope.

You only say shit like that because you know it can't happen.

People have a lot worse problems than acne and family would support you if your face fell off in a battery acid accident.

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