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I'm a nice guy. I help people, give money to strangers, neat, quiet and polite, socially responsible. In almost every common social interaction I get bad service, ignored, frustrated looks, all without even opening my mouth. The conclusion is inescapable; I'm physically unattractive (a.k.a. creepy, a.k.a. ugly). Studies have shown that unattractive people get worse service, tend to be ignored and are associated with negative traits.

I don't have "social anxiety" or "bad" acne, rather over years of negative reactions to my physical appearance has taught me to avoid that which is hurtful and unpleasant. There's no syndrome with me, I'm creepy looking, therefore people treat me bad, therefore I don't like to be around people.

Short of plastic surgery, this is unchangeable. So, finding ways to avoid people is more a survival and quality of life thing than an illness or anything else. Yes, I'd rather be attractive and acceptable, but that simply isn't an option. Taking drugs to be oblivious to my status seems counterproductive as well. Reality.

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Guest ilovepancakes

if it is possible you could try a be less creepy. maybe smile more or dress nicer. make eye contact and remember not to zone out (i do this alot and people think im on drugs).

try and keep cheerful. but definately dont become bitter towards others, it will only make you angery and people will treat you worse.

also dont give up on yourself ever.

:ninja:

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I don't think people care as much as you think they do.

I've been ill for the past few years, and I look VERY sick, very "creepy" as you would put it. But I don't let it affect my personality. I am the nicest person to everyone I meet, I smile when talked to (even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass) I do not avoid people, because if I did then people would REALLY think I am creepy.

I find that a strong personality is what people are attracted to. The only time people cared was in high school, and that's long over for me. I meet people everyday, and I don't give a crap about what they look like, I don't even think twice about whether they are unattractive or not. So if I don't care, why should anyone else care? Maybe those statistics are right, people associate negative things with people who are unnattractive, but if you believe that is happening with you, don't let it. Show people who you are, not what you look like. There are more important things in life than looks, a LOT more important things, and if you are oblivious to life and people, you will never find them.

-Sarah

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if it is possible you could try a be less creepy. maybe smile more or dress nicer. make eye contact and remember not to zone out (i do this alot and people think im on drugs).

try and keep cheerful. but definately dont become bitter towards others, it will only make you angery and people will treat you worse.

also dont give up on yourself ever.

:ninja:

If there is any advice you take out of this, its to do this (dress nicer). By dressing nicer you show a social class of elite status (even though you might not be rich, you can dress like it). But I guarantee you will get better service in restaurants, help at stores, and more looks from people. Despite what your face might look like, dressed individuals are few and far between, and are often seen as good looking well-kempt people who are successful.

I dress up a lot regardless of where I go and you see from my avatar how I look.

:surprised:

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I don't think it matters what the average person thinks. They don't know you. Care about the friendships you have with people that understand you as a person, not a shell. Get through it knowing there are people who know your real story.

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i agree, when i go to the bank i get the most dirtiest looks ever. They think im so unclean ithink. Damn it sucks i know how you feel.

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It all comes down to looking and being just a bit confident. This will make your aura (in lack of a better word), glow, apperance and personal magnetism seem much better and you'll become interresting for the ladies and random people on the street and so on. With a bit of cofindence and YOUR personal charm you'll get further than you can imagine... Don't be afraid of who you are, or at least try not to. Éverybody feels a bit off sometimes, it's just natural...

I know a guy who, I would say, haven't been the luckiest guy on the planet when it comes to looks. BUT he is just a bit confident( not overly confindent) and he still get's alot of attention because he is always smiling, looking people in the eyes and so on.... Try that! But it won't work unless you are feeling, somewhat, okay about yourself. So cheer up, this will work for you at some point i'm sure!

Best of Luck, T.

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I second what everyone else said, if you make yourself out too look nice and have confidence in yourself then other people will too. If you go out thinking man I look like shit and I am so creepy what do you expect other people to think? You gotta improve your view of yourself before others will improve their views of you. :)

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I agree with others who say work on your appearance. Dress Nicer.. Get a New Haircut..

But also, work on your body language. I've noticed that people react to your more politely when you have such powerful, confident body language.

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yea.. and the member name "cereal killer" aint helpin your image either lol

perfect timing !!!!!!! f'n hilarious!!! i didnt even look at his name!!!

but man do i feel your pain homey.

havent been with a lady in a long time and i was SO confident when i was younger didnt care how hot a girl was i would just straight up start talking to her and ask her out, Then id try again the next day and the next till i got a yes, i was not afraid and the no's never even phased me.

But now things are quite different, its not that i get turned down alot its that i dont think of myself well enough to even talk to a girl anymore. its really hard to go from such a transition.

not even trying to say i am that good looking. BACK THEN i thought i did and that made quite a difference.

girls still try to check in with me it seems to see how im lookin, even years after high school.

Ive become so lame that even all of who i thought were my best friends dont even talk to me anymore cause im a nobody. at least in their eyes.

i got like one friend that i still talk to. and its real hard to make new friends it seems like i think someone likes me and then it seems like they are just trying to be nice and its like fuck off!!! dont be fake to me man. well my life is hilarious man!!!!!good times

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I don't think it matters what the average person thinks. They don't know you. Care about the friendships you have with people that understand you as a person, not a shell. Get through it knowing there are people who know your real story.

This website wouldn't exist if it didn't matter what the average person thinks. Friendships? Ha. Nobody knows me, therefore nobody knows my "real story."

You can tell me to change my hair or buy new clothes (I hate mall. It's a monument to everything that is superificial), but it will all be for nothing because it's the contour of my face that is ugly and creepy. I won't fool anyone. Reality.

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I don't think it matters what the average person thinks. They don't know you. Care about the friendships you have with people that understand you as a person, not a shell. Get through it knowing there are people who know your real story.

This website wouldn't exist if it didn't matter what the average person thinks. Friendships? Ha. Nobody knows me, therefore nobody knows my "real story."

You can tell me to change my hair or buy new clothes (I hate mall. It's a monument to everything that is superificial), but it will all be for nothing because it's the contour of my face that is ugly and creepy. I won't fool anyone. Reality.

Well you're fucked then!

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SAd ruth is people judge and treat people based on their looks and they do it without even knowing it. Its like a naturual thing. A tall muscular man with a handsome face is going to be taken more seriously, and treated better by people, than the guy whos five six built like a woman and has a pot belly and an ugly mug. And yet thay don't even realize their doing it. People judge you based on your looks without even knowing that their doing it.

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SAd ruth is people judge and treat people based on their looks and they do it without even knowing it. Its like a naturual thing. A tall muscular man with a handsome face is going to be taken more seriously, and treated better by people, than the guy whos five six built like a woman and has a pot belly and an ugly mug. And yet thay don't even realize their doing it. People judge you based on your looks without even knowing that their doing it.

Which is why the advice in thread is so contradictive to what the original poster should and shouldn't do.

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Man this thread went way off. It started with sound advice.

Really, the best things you can do to get with more people or have more friends, is to open up and join a club or a society. Seriously.

Go do something you want to do, and you'll find others like you. This forum is great cuz it links those who want to find out more about acne, with others that do the same.

My advice is get confidence, meet new people, and be open and genuine (have self-deprecating sense of humor). THE BEST WAY TO DO THIS is join a dojo or club.

SERIOUSLY: Do kick-boxing, Jujitsu, even gay stuff like Karate. It will boost your self confidence, which will make you more attractive all the while meeting you with new people that you share something with.

OR. you could join the army like me and have fun with a gun.

Seriously tho- DO Brazilian Jujitsu. Its alot of fun and it can lead to a career in MMA.

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Man this thread went way off. It started with sound advice.

Really, the best things you can do to get with more people or have more friends, is to open up and join a club or a society. Seriously.

Go do something you want to do, and you'll find others like you. This forum is great cuz it links those who want to find out more about acne, with others that do the same.

My advice is get confidence, meet new people, and be open and genuine (have self-deprecating sense of humor). THE BEST WAY TO DO THIS is join a dojo or club.

SERIOUSLY: Do kick-boxing, Jujitsu, even gay stuff like Karate. It will boost your self confidence, which will make you more attractive all the while meeting you with new people that you share something with.

OR. you could join the army like me and have fun with a gun.

Seriously tho- DO Brazilian Jujitsu. Its alot of fun and it can lead to a career in MMA.

Yeah, I've heard martial arts really is good for self esteem and gaining self confidence. I'd LOVE to do brazilian jujitsu, but I am unsure where I could go to learn it.

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SAd ruth is people judge and treat people based on their looks and they do it without even knowing it. Its like a naturual thing. A tall muscular man with a handsome face is going to be taken more seriously, and treated better by people, than the guy whos five six built like a woman and has a pot belly and an ugly mug. And yet thay don't even realize their doing it. People judge you based on your looks without even knowing that their doing it.

Exactly. I guess I'll just have to accept the fact that I will be amongst the shunned in society.

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Guest Michael Jackson

Man this thread went way off. It started with sound advice.

Really, the best things you can do to get with more people or have more friends, is to open up and join a club or a society. Seriously.

Go do something you want to do, and you'll find others like you. This forum is great cuz it links those who want to find out more about acne, with others that do the same.

My advice is get confidence, meet new people, and be open and genuine (have self-deprecating sense of humor). THE BEST WAY TO DO THIS is join a dojo or club.

SERIOUSLY: Do kick-boxing, Jujitsu, even gay stuff like Karate. It will boost your self confidence, which will make you more attractive all the while meeting you with new people that you share something with.

OR. you could join the army like me and have fun with a gun.

Seriously tho- DO Brazilian Jujitsu. Its alot of fun and it can lead to a career in MMA.

A fellow brazilian jiu jitsu man at the org?

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Man this thread went way off. It started with sound advice.

Really, the best things you can do to get with more people or have more friends, is to open up and join a club or a society. Seriously.

Go do something you want to do, and you'll find others like you. This forum is great cuz it links those who want to find out more about acne, with others that do the same.

My advice is get confidence, meet new people, and be open and genuine (have self-deprecating sense of humor). THE BEST WAY TO DO THIS is join a dojo or club.

SERIOUSLY: Do kick-boxing, Jujitsu, even gay stuff like Karate. It will boost your self confidence, which will make you more attractive all the while meeting you with new people that you share something with.

OR. you could join the army like me and have fun with a gun.

Seriously tho- DO Brazilian Jujitsu. Its alot of fun and it can lead to a career in MMA.

Yeah, I've heard martial arts really is good for self esteem and gaining self confidence. I'd LOVE to do brazilian jujitsu, but I am unsure where I could go to learn it.

You can learn it anywhere really, its become widely popularized. OR You could just come over and ill teach you.

OR if your like this badass fighter we have around here, you can learn it from instruction videos and end up kicking my ass.

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