Jump to content
Acne.org
Search In
Find results that contain...
Find results in...
A sadness I can't erase

Popularity is highly dependent on looks

Think back to high school or college. Did you ever see anybody that hung with the "cool" crowd and was butt ugly? Rarely. It's socially unacceptable to be associated with ugly people unless you are ugly yourself. And have you ever noticed how good-looking people tend to only socialize with other good-looking people? It's true. Water likes to seek it's own level. They are also more approachable, perceived as amiable and smarter, and well-respected. Good-looks are your foot-in-the-door to many things, like work, friends, and relationships. It is possible to still be considered attractive with acne, but that just means you have to be good-looking to start off with. If you're ugly and have acne, hah, you are a leper... like me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Unless of course you're confident and funny and likeable anyway! Then people like you regardless.

But I think this is just one of those "I need to whine" posts, and I'm definitely guilty of posting a few so carry on. :cool:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Think back to high school or college. Did you ever see anybody that hung with the "cool" crowd and was butt ugly? Rarely. It's socially unacceptable to be associated with ugly people unless you are ugly yourself. And have you ever noticed how good-looking people tend to only socialize with other good-looking people? It's true. Water likes to seek it's own level. They are also more approachable, perceived as amiable and smarter, and well-respected. Good-looks are your foot-in-the-door to many things, like work, friends, and relationships. It is possible to still be considered attractive with acne, but that just means you have to be good-looking to start off with. If you're ugly and have acne, hah, you are a leper... like me.

yes good looks does play a big part-actually it plays an enormous role in popularity but i've seen a few people who weren't all that great looking become popluar because they posessed great personalities or humor. Most of them were popluar because they were funny and outgoing. I think those qualities are valued more than looks.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Depends on who you hang with, where you are hanging, and why you are hanging together.

Let's face it - high school is the rat race of all rat races. It's hell. It sucks, plain and simple. No one knows who the hell they are and no one CAN - not until they get some life experience in. Just the way it goes.

So of course the good looking kids are all going to band together and heckle the less "good looking" ones. It's what happens.

In the real world (and by this I mean outside of Hollywood), it doesn't quite work like that. At least, I haven't found it to work like that. Once people graduate high school and get busy living thier lives, they generally have less time for the lives of others.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

But lepers have colonies. Who else has colonies?!

:)

Colonials.....and ants.....

High school might have been like that, but that's just hormones. Everyone is obsessed with hotness at that age.... College wasn't like that at all for me....I was Miss Gothy Galore and had friends in all different social circles.... Looks might play a factor in who you date, but shouldn't determine how you pick your friends....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

yes good looks does play a big part-actually it plays an enormous role in popularity but i've seen a few people who weren't all that great looking become popluar because they posessed great personalities or humor. Most of them were popluar because they were funny and outgoing. I think those qualities are valued more than looks.

I'm a good example for this. It's true in highschool I only hanged out with a few girls, who were somewhat popular. But now in college I get to hang around with both guys and girls that have the looks and the great personality and the whole package. They realize I have acne and I have a far from perfect face because of that, but they still like me as I am. And it IS because of my personality, which I think should be the most important when to comes to human interaction / relationships.

So of course shallow people could just look at you and say "Hey you're ugly, I don't wanna hang out with you", but these people aren't even worth the "title" of friend in my opinion. They may be cool and popular but just judging someone by their looks and not trying to put themselves in that person's shoes is just a proof that they can't be true friends and that's why one should not feel bad if one of these persons doesn't even look at him/her.

[Hope this hasn't got too long, so as to bore someone....]

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At the end of the day, people who are shallow are the ones that miss out. Not the rest of the world. Because if the chances are they're not havign much fun if they only want super-good looking friends.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

One of my mates isn't the best looking of blokes but he scores A LOT of girls because he just has such a larger than life personality. Girls always say that he just oozes sexual magnetism!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Think back to high school or college. Did you ever see anybody that hung with the "cool" crowd and was butt ugly? Rarely. It's socially unacceptable to be associated with ugly people unless you are ugly yourself. And have you ever noticed how good-looking people tend to only socialize with other good-looking people? It's true. Water likes to seek it's own level. They are also more approachable, perceived as amiable and smarter, and well-respected. Good-looks are your foot-in-the-door to many things, like work, friends, and relationships. It is possible to still be considered attractive with acne, but that just means you have to be good-looking to start off with. If you're ugly and have acne, hah, you are a leper... like me.

ok 2 things. Im not gonna bullshit you and say looks dont mean anything because they are important, alot of people judge you, i learned that the hard way, i mean i had 2 take a hardcore drug that gave me all these side effects and pretty much broke down my body alil bit for the sake of my looks, and other people take this drug as well, so what does that say about looks?

2nd off, who gives a shit about being popular? You really think anybody cares or remember who was popular 5 years after highschool? In my highschool the popular kids were the kids who were dumb and had no chance of becoming successful in life. and i dont think popularity is all based on looks, some of it is just meant to be. You ever notice some people, just make alot of friends anywhere they go? Like no matter where they go everybody likes them, everybody thinks they are funny and cooll, then theres other people, that for no reason, aren't well liked, like their not hated, just there not the type of person every1 is gona run to be friends with, even though they look and are perfectly normal.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2nd off, who gives a shit about being popular? You really think anybody cares or remember who was popular 5 years after highschool? In my highschool the popular kids were the kids who were dumb and had no chance of becoming successful in life. and i dont think popularity is all based on looks, some of it is just meant to be. You ever notice some people, just make alot of friends anywhere they go? Like no matter where they go everybody likes them, everybody thinks they are funny and cooll, then theres other people, that for no reason, aren't well liked, like their not hated, just there not the type of person every1 is gona run to be friends with, even though they look and are perfectly normal.

I agree :clap:

But also, it's that hard to think that beauty comes from being the kind of people matt's talking about

Think about it for a moment, you get used to the physical aspect of a friend of a person who is friendly and self-confident and his/her attitude will influence the way you find this person physically attractive

Beauty doesn't exist on itself, it needs a mental concept of any sort to be based upon ... we find people attractive because they act, they talk, they ideas and dreams and are friendly or full of vitality

The physical features must be mentally associated to the characteristics and behaviors of a person and it doesn't mean if you are aware of this, that's the kind of subconscious link you're making

I've seen people who were considered ugly or clumsy suddenly being considered beautiful and hot and nothing changed in their body, they just became more confident and acted differently and were more confortable around people

Even just learning to stand tall with your head straight improves the attractiveness of person, the ugly one usually is hunching while walking

The proof if that there are lot of actors/actress who are considered hot by their class mates but they weren't before and were considered the ugly nerds even if they have just the same face and body

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

But also, it's that hard to think that beauty comes from being the kind of people matt's talking about

Think about it for a moment, you get used to the physical aspect of a friend of a person who is friendly and self-confident and his/her attitude will influence the way you find this person physically attractive

Beauty doesn't exist on itself, it needs a mental concept of any sort to be based upon ... we find people attractive because they act, they talk, they ideas and dreams and are friendly or full of vitality

The physical features must be mentally associated to the characteristics and behaviors of a person and it doesn't mean if you are aware of this, that's the kind of subconscious link you're making

Hmmm....what high school did you go to? In my high school the only real prerequisite for being a popular girl was having big boobs. That's it.....boobs....being big.... Being easy to allow for quick access to aformentioned big boobs also helped.... I'm sure that contributed to 'vitality' of some sort, but probably not the kind you are talking about...

Not that I disagree with what you are saying....I just think that the appreciation for other aspects of beauty develops a little later in life for many people.....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

smile man you can't help what you look like, but you can get super rich later on in life and get a mega hot wife while all the "popular" kids are working at BK and the chicks are getting lipo for their fat asses

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

But also, it's that hard to think that beauty comes from being the kind of people matt's talking about

Think about it for a moment, you get used to the physical aspect of a friend of a person who is friendly and self-confident and his/her attitude will influence the way you find this person physically attractive

Beauty doesn't exist on itself, it needs a mental concept of any sort to be based upon ... we find people attractive because they act, they talk, they ideas and dreams and are friendly or full of vitality

The physical features must be mentally associated to the characteristics and behaviors of a person and it doesn't mean if you are aware of this, that's the kind of subconscious link you're making

Not that I disagree with what you are saying....I just think that the appreciation for other aspects of beauty develops a little later in life for many people.....

I'm saying that the appreciation for other aspects of beauty is subconscious and related to what we call beauty

There can't be beauty without something subconsiously correlated to that

Noses, mouths, boobs, legs, hair everything would be just neutral if there wasn't a subconscious mental association ... there's nothing beauty in these things per se, it comes from what our subconscious associate them to

I don't believe in your school girls who were considered "ugly" would have been labelled as hot only if they had "big boobs" ... so clearly it was just one of the aspect ... but what I'm saying is that everything in physical beauty is related to attitude and that's how people who are considered ugly nerds can turn into confident hot people just by changing their attitude (which may also include choose different clothes, use lenses instead of eyeglasses, choose a different hair cut and other things)

But the point is beauty and confidence are strictly correlated even when we're not aware of this link because it's subonscious

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

it depends how shallow you are. i wouldn't just hang about with good looking people or just ugly people it depends who i get on with

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm saying that the appreciation for other aspects of beauty is subconscious and related to what we call beauty

There can't be beauty without something subconsiously correlated to that

Noses, mouths, boobs, legs, hair everything would be just neutral if there wasn't a subconscious mental association ... there's nothing beauty in these things per se, it comes from what our subconscious associate them to

I don't believe in your school girls who were considered "ugly" would have been labelled as hot only if they had "big boobs" ... so clearly it was just one of the aspect ... but what I'm saying is that everything in physical beauty is related to attitude and that's how people who are considered ugly nerds can turn into confident hot people just by changing their attitude (which may also include choose different clothes, use lenses instead of eyeglasses, choose a different hair cut and other things)

But the point is beauty and confidence are strictly correlated even when we're not aware of this link because it's subonscious

Nope, I'm fairly certain it was only the big boobs. And the being easy part. In fact, there was one girl in particular who they called 'hacksaw' because the guys said she's be perfect if you could just hacksaw off her head. Clever...high school boys are oh so full of wit.... But hey, she was popular....

You just said that "physical beauty is related to attitude and that's how people who are considered ugly nerds can turn into confident hot people just by changing their attitude (which may also include choose different clothes, use lenses instead of eyeglasses, choose a different hair cut and other things)."

Um...if you change your clothes, eyewear and hairstyle, those are physical things, not attitude. That's like saying that an overweight person can become a hot, skinny person by losing a bunch of weight. No kidding...of course your attitude is going to change. As a direct result of the physical changes.

Again, I'm not disagreeing with you per se, I'm just saying that the appreciation for a person's less obvious beauty usually comes after high school. It might always be in our subconscious, but during high school I think it's obscured by a swirling cloud of raging hormones.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

heres examples of how youre wrong:

thom york

adam carolla

brian posehn

if youve got a commodity you can sell like, like musical talent or humor, you can be popular.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest Michael Jackson

How to be popular

1. Have access to booze.

2. Have access to weed.

3. know good party spots.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

2nd off, who gives a shit about being popular? You really think anybody cares or remember who was popular 5 years after highschool?

I give a shit, and so do a lot of people. And yes, people do remember who was popular 5 years after high school because they're still all friends! I just saw an episode of Everyone Loves Raymond where he went to his high school reunion. He ran into the guy (along with his sidekick) who used to throw him in the girl's bathroom, along with a really hot and popular girl that him and his friends used to like. There's just some stuff you don't forget.

Being popular is good for networking. Networking can take you far in life. Being alone and a loser with acne won't.

How to be popular

1. Have access to booze.

2. Have access to weed.

3. know good party spots.

Agreed.

heres examples of how youre wrong:

thom york

adam carolla

brian posehn

if youve got a commodity you can sell like, like musical talent or humor, you can be popular.

True. But what are the chances of that ever happening? Get real.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

get real?!!!!!!!

theyre a million times better than youre chances of being beautiful, which is zero!

theyre popular because they worked for it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

2nd off, who gives a shit about being popular? You really think anybody cares or remember who was popular 5 years after highschool?

I give a shit, and so do a lot of people. And yes, people do remember who was popular 5 years after high school because they're still all friends! I just saw an episode of Everyone Loves Raymond where he went to his high school reunion. He ran into the guy (along with his sidekick) who used to throw him in the girl's bathroom, along with a really hot and popular girl that him and his friends used to like. There's just some stuff you don't forget.

Being popular is good for networking. Networking can take you far in life. Being alone and a loser with acne won't.

Bullshit go watch A Bronx Tale maybe you'll undersand this better. Fuck everyone and being popular, inever wanted to be popular, and im glad I never was popular.. Im gonna make it in life with or without people.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

being popular is a real ego boost, something all us depressed acne sufferers need...

Though being pretty helps, it isn't the definitive thing is it?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Personalized Advice Quiz - All of Acne.org in just a few minutes


×