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Week 3, Day 1

hotglue01

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Welp, two full weeks now.

Current status: some more of the blackheads on my chin are coming to the surface in the form of tiny red and/or yellow pimples, while the other ones have flattened out into red marks that will probably not linger for very long (yay!). My temples remain more or less clear, of active acne save for the left side where a long-incubating whitehead has turned into a full-blown zit. My forehead has a few tiny red pimples and most of the blackheads from before (leaving tiny reddish pink marks in their wake), although some of them fell (/were scraped…) out.

My chest is generally fine, and the one giant cyst I had right in the middle (which has prevented me from wearing v-neck shirts) has almost flattened out. It was big, MAROON, and developed TWO yellow heads before sort of bursting on its own when I poked it, and since then the yellow stuff has been drained and the scab that formed on it more or less fell off this morning (again, minor prodding on my part…). I hope it heals up soon...

My back is generally clearing up, with most of the bigger zits continuing to flatten out – it’s a long road for them!  – and a few more bigger things coming to the surface. The good news is that the newer zits/cysts that are coming to the surface go away in about a week, not really leaving any significant marks in their wake. The other red marks remain, as do some stubborn blackheads that don’t seem to be responding quickly to BP. I wish they’d either turn into a zit and go away forever, or just dry up and fall out (much preferred!).

Sigh. I’m frustrated that things aren’t moving along faster… my chin is actually seeing pretty big changes, with the parts that have broken out and cleared up actually looking smooth and soft. This past week I went through a big dry spell with my face first looking red and irritated and then flaking off in sheets, so I’ve toned down the BP a bit which helps with that terrible cycle. I’m afraid to use jojoba on my face, but I have been dabbing a very mild safflower oil onto my chin/area under my mouth before BP, which also seems to be helping the redness. The thing is, once my skin gets super irritated I’m just afraid that it’ll break out more once the dryness lets up – plus there’s the added irritation from slathering lotion on it several times a day so that my face isn’t flaking in public or at my job -- but then I’m also afraid that if I don’t use enough BP, the Regimen isn’t going to work as well. Arg! This is why I wanted to go off DKR in the first place… but it’s the only thing that has ever worked for me.

My forehead, as well as these blackhead thatches on my back, doesn’t necessarily look BAD, but I’m just confused why they’re not clearing up with all the BP I’ve been slathering on. On the other hand, although I’m wont to see any progress given the attitude I have about my skin right now, I looked at some pictures of myself from two weeks ago and things definitely look a lot better. Like, noticeably. My chin doesn’t look on the verge of sprouting up new zits, and my forehead doesn’t look as unstable, either. Most of the little mysterious zits I have there have shrunk significantly, although again… this is some stubborn acne we’re talking about.

Generally, I’m feeling alternating waves of frustration and hope. While I’m upset with myself for letting my skin get this bad, for trying Differin (which made a mess of things), and for not healing faster, what good is that going to do? Things ARE starting to look better, slowly but surely, and it’s not like I got clear after two weeks the first time I started the Regimen (even though my skin was much more inflamed in those days). My skin is what it is, and I just have to remember to stay focused. In the places where I’m breaking out on my face and back – that said, I have a few tiny zits near my smile lines, and in the area between my eyebrows – it’s mostly stuff clearing up and coming to the surface on its own, and if it IS new, it’s places where my skin is irritated either by me touching it or from a heavy backpack that I lug around because I decided to get a fucking PhD. Ugh. Plus, I already have noticed that I’m spending less time on the Regimen at night, and could stand to be lighter with my touch.

So… hoping for some more clearing this week. Maybe I’ll post some pics!



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