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DAY 30 & 31- Getting Worse

Yesterday was the worst day I've had on the tablet and in the past year actually 

I had a family event with my boyfriend yesterday and I was not really in the mood to go in the first place. The way my head is at right now is that I'm being nice to people (because I have to) but inside I really couldn't care less what people are talking about and small things that people say annoy me so much and I feel like people are talking about me and giving me dirty looks etc. 

So I went to the event and got through it okay, I was feeling quite down but I put on a happy face. Driving home from it I got really upset (I think all the stress came out) and I cried the whole way home. I pulled myself together going into my house but the minute I sat down beside my mam I was sobbing :( I haven't cried like I did in a long long time and the most frustrating part is I don't know why I'm upset and feeling so down.. 
It was really inconsolable crying so I was happy i had held It together until I was home with my family. 

I I had a good chat with my mam and dad and told them the exact feelings and frustrations I'm having.  
I know that if this gets worse I'm going to have to stop taking Roaccutane but right now I'm really trying not to get to that point. 

Today I'm in a good mood. Maybe a good cry is what I needed. I know that my mental health is priority but for now I want to try fight how I'm feeling. 

Ive been feeling so lucky that my skin hasn't dried out and I haven't had any bad breakouts but my head is all over the place which is really scary. I feel like I could definitely deal with some dryness over how I am right now. 

trying to stay positive though for now :)
I'm very lucky to have my family with me going through this 


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