Ever since a blemish or two would leave my face, a scar or two would decide to stay. I noticed all types of scaring on my face as my acne would clear up, but as the acne would come back again, the scars weren't as visible. Just the biggo bumps. Now after a long journey my skin is a little over 90% clear.. or more like I have been keeping some acne under control.. and when I have a new zit, I know exactly why he's there.. and then of course a new scar decides to hang out with the rest. AHH!!
Picking my acne when I was in high school seemed almost normal. And as I did hear it could leave you marks, I NEVER though I would be one with pitted scars as my acne wasn't severe back in the day. Now after having experienced what severe adult acne was (is), I regret popping all those pimples as I am now left with pitted scars.
Most of my acne scars are on my cheeks, and one side of my temples. I am currently doing gentle peels at my skin clinic which have dramatically helped at reducing hyperpigmentation, but not so much the indented texture.
There are days in where I look at my skin and say, "Wow" skin looks good! Scars don't seem too bad... but others I'm just like AHHH!! Scars look horrible! But I know that that depends on where I am looking at my skin. For example in my bathroom mirror at 7:30 in the morning as i get ready for work, or looking at my reflexion in a car window at 3pm when the sun is shinning. The deal here though, is that the scars are there. They are not cute. I dislike them much. And I wish i had never picked at my skin, though I also know some were just gonna stay even if i didn't... sigh...
Wish my skin was a little smother. No need to be perfect.. just not have pitted scars. Ever..
Fraxel laser? No thanks.. done some research.. what if my skin hates it! I know someone so sensitive to it that tried it and i mean.. idk.. : (
Microderms? I've tried them. And they helped! but that when my acne wasn't at its craziest. Could possibly consider again.. not sure.
Chemical peels? Currently doing some like 1 every 1-2 months. But they are very light with not so harsh stuff in it. More like a 'Raspberry peach one' from my acne clinic hehe.. I don't peel like a snake though. No crazy peelings. Perhaps i may need a deeper one? once again i don't know..
Micro-needling? Currently doing that once to twice per month depending how my skin is doing, but honeslty I don't know if that even would ever work for me.. doing the 0.5 mm from banish acne scars..
The question here is... what now? Accept them on my face for life? Try something different? Spend thousands of dollars which i don't have to try to fix it, yet still be prone to break outs? Guess only time would give me the answers...
In the mean time, I'm alive, I am healthy, I am loved, and I am aware that all this is something i see more than others even care.. #SIGH