I'm back. Again.
I had a blog here before, however my picking has not gotten better, in fact, it has gotten worse, and now I have done so much damage to my face that it is starting scar.
I fairly good skin, though I do get break outs from time to time, but that's not really the issue. It doesn't really matter what my skin is like because I will ATTACK it anyways.
I have to say that it has definitely gotten worse since my accident in last august (2013). I cut my toes off with a lawnmower. (message if you want more details.) and while I was struggling with mild PTSD before I thought I was doing better, but since moving back into my apartment, and since the new year, things have only gotten worse.
I have always used my fingers for picking, but recently I went through a phase where I used bobby pins (I had to find and throw out every. single. one. before I stopped using them, they were very damaging.) Then I saw a video where a woman was using a pair of tweezers, and since then I have been using my fingers in conjunction with tweezers. At the end of a picking session, lasting anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 1/2 hours, when I am angry, and despairing and feeling like complete I will usually chuck the tweezers across the room in hopes that I'll lose it and not be able to use to pick anymore. I always manage to find it.
I take 27mg of Concerta a day to deal with ADD, and if I don't take these meds then I become a raging, INCREDIBLY angry, and aggressive person, but these also make my picking worse. It's like picking the lesser of two evils. And for the sake of my patient, and saintly boyfriend, I choose to take my meds daily. Which I know I should do anyways.
Anyway, it's come to the point where my father literally got down on his knees and begged me to stop. But I just can't seem to. He even asked if I could just pick somewhere else, anywhere else, just not my face.
I am waiting for a referral to go through to a psychiatrist to see if they can prescribe me SSRI's which are beneficial for obsessive compulsive disorders, and I have spoken to my GP about this.
I picked yesterday and today, but before that I managed to go for almost a week without picking and my face was just beginning to heal.
Help me. I need support, guidance, and methods of stopping this.
I use a raw honey mask a couple times a week, and Melaleuca to try and stop the redness and help heal the scabs. I wash my face with neutragena cleanser and use the matching moisturizer daily.