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Rant .

elleohelle

408 views

Hello.

This is my first post. And I thought I'd just like to create a huge rant of how this ruthless little skin issue has impacted my life. So here's a bulleted list of reasons why I hate acne so much.

-I'm beyond insecure. Insecure doesn't define how self conscious I am.

-I can't look people in the eye anymore.

-I constantly hide my face with my hands. If I'm at school, I lean against my fist just under my eye (so I don't touch my skin) so people won't look at that side of my face.

-I hate taking showers because when I get out of them and see how red and disgusting my face is, I freak out.

-I don't have as many friends. I don't talk to people as much because of it, I don't remember the last time I went to the movies or bowling. I reject every sleepover or hang out.

-If I do sleepover someone's house, I have to put on makeup to sleep, and then it generally gets worse after because I clog my pores.

-My friends think I don't want to hang out with them but they don't know how insecure I am.

-I have to wear makeup everywhere I go.

-I have panic attacks, depression, anxiety, and sometimes suicidal thoughts.

-I'm embarassed to show my face in front of my family.

-I compare myself to all my friends, or actresses on TV.

-When walking in hallways in school, I have to hide my face.

-I use my hair to hide my face.

-I cry about 3-6 times a week.

-I have a habit of picking and popping my pimples.

-I feel like makeup makes me look fake and gross.

-I hate how the girl in school who like never takes a shower has CLEAR skin, but me with perfect hygiene, has disgusting acne.

-I feel like people judge me every single time they look at me.

-I hate now going to soccer and sports. Wearing my hair up makes me feel gross. not to mention, I have to wear makeup to soccer -_-

-I hate when someone makes a comment about using a certain product or washing my face. I wash my face, thank you very much.

-I'm on medication right now. Minocycline. I'm approaching my second week. And I feel more insecure then ever to be honest.

-I'm depressed all the time.

-I hate going on front view camera on my iPhone because I see every fucking flaw.

-I feel like I have no hope for clear skin.

-I notice pimples on people who have very clear skin. I search for the flaws on people. And it makes me wonder how much people see when they look at my stupid face.

-I've self harmed over it.

-My father always blames my diet and tries to do stuff to get rid of my acne. It's so upsetting to me. I eat healthily now and quite honestly I eat a lot less. I think it's because I feel anything I eat that's unhealthy will break me out, so now I literally starve myself and just drink water.

-I think I have a pretty face, and body, but not the acne.

-I would be so much happier with clear skin. I could wake up and not worry about being this way. I could go downstairs and be comfortable around my family. I could go to school happy and confident. I'd talk to people. I'd smile. I'd be me.

-I don't know who I've become. I'm upset constantly.



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Thank you for sharing your experiences. Talking about the emotional impact of acne is very important and cathartic.

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Every single thing you said I can relate to. I've been dealing with bad skin for over 40 yrs! I had bad acne that started in the 6th grade. The acne still comes and goes but it's the indented scars that make me sick. I had a resurfacing done that left me with more scars, actually worse than the ones I went in for along with a dent from the heat of the laser melting my skin.

I lost over 30 lbs from the stress. I don't go anywhere, I shake when I get up each day thinking I have to look in the mirror. I don't like my own family seeing me or being in my own house unless the shades are drawn. If it's acne that's getting you down it will get better. You sound young since your still going to school & you will grow out of it or at least 80% to 90% of it. I was put on meds but now I'm weaning myself off because they didn't do anything for me. I stopped sleeping the last 2 yrs because it finally got to me after dealing with this for 7 yrs when I had the resurfacing done. Bad skin doesn't let you be you. It kills your spirit. I also blame the media with their perfect picture of how we should look & they airbursh everything. I see very few actors or people on tv with bad skin because no one wants to be seen with their face not looking perfect. There is a girl on youtube called diamondsandheels14 who has acne yet she's a model & shows how to cover any acne. She makes her skin look perfect. You would never believe her skin is bad. For me I wish I could cover my problems like she does but make up makes scars look worse. You will get better Hon. I know the feeling & a lot of others do too. I wish people weren't like the way they are sometimes. They can be very mean, people with good skin have no idea what it's like for us to wake up each day & not just have to worry about what we're wearing when you don't feel you look good in anything with bad skin. Many think of ending it. I think about my friends who passed and they would give anything, even scars & acne to come back. You will find something that works. Try not to go on meds because their just hiding your problems & usually don't work if your having a bad skin day so don't go on anything if you can help it. Hang in there Hon, your acne will get better. Just don't pick at them like my mother did to get scars. There's also a quite a few others that have bad skin on youtube. There were 2 girls that I couldn't believe how bad their skin was but they went on Accutane & look much better. But try to stay away from that stuff too if your not really, really bad. I know it's hard but you have to go on & you will see a difference in time.

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Chin up babe, i feel exactly the same way!

I am on my 3rd week of Oratane (accutane australian version) and things are getting worse for me! But it is expected.

Ive tried everything on the market, orally and topically and never permanent results and had enough so i asked the doctor for oratane.

This is the last resort for me because i have spent sooooooo much money, time, effort, energy and tears on acne and want to be done with it!

Hopefully your medication will work!!! But everyone is different.

AND we are own worse critics!!! Try not to be so hard on yourself.

I hope we all clear up soon!!!!

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Dont worry man you sound kinda like me. I have lost contact with my friends because i dont want them to see my face. I cry every week, hide myself when relatives come around. I always look down at the ground and walk and totally avoid mirrors.

I dont eat much in fear of a breakout and I have lost a stone. My sister thinks i have an eating disorder when really i 'm just scared of getting new cysts, papules, pustules every day. My back face arms are covered in acne and hyperpigmentation marks. I now leave my hair outbecause i look een uglier iwith it tied up but that makes my backne even worse.

I dont know what to do with myself I am now sixteen I am worrying constantly on my acne that my grades have fallen and i know that i will definetly not go through to y13 this year. I also need a job but with a face like mine and a shallow society that is not going to happen.

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Guest GetMeTheResults

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just go on accutane, that's what in planning on doing

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