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Week 11

tanna23

Entry posted by tanna23 ·

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I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle with the BP. My skin doesn't seem to be improving anymore. It's oily again. I guess it was just a matter of time before I adjusted and started making more oil. I like not having skin that hurts when I smile but at the same time I hate being shiny.

I hate that when my friends want to make plans with me a week in advance all I can think about is what my skin will look like in a week because I never really know. I had couple horrible pimples that left two horrible marks on my face recently and it seems like I just can't help but stare at them in the mirror. I broke down one day last week and cried because of some asshole I met. I'm sick of people speaking to me like they see me drinking buckets of sugar and oil. I'm sick of people's "advice." I live in the kind of place where people feel like they have a right to point out your flaws... and it really gets to me. It's depressing.

I collected some antibiotics last week. I know I said in my review that you shouldn't try them, and you really shouldn't but I just wanted to have a few good months. I didn't start drinking them yet though. I know that I'll have to stop and that I'll break out when I stop, and since I don't have a plan for what to do after that... i haven't taken them. I just felt so frustrated and when I used them the last time they worked so fast.

When I close my eyes I imagine myself as someone else, someone who isn't covered with ugly pimples and marks. Someone who's happy, who can wear anything. It just isn't fair to me that I spend so much time on my skin, I work so hard on keeping acne triggers out of my diet, I spend so much damn money on products and I just can't have skin that people don't feel the need to comment about.


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hope27

im a waitress I get comments a lot even when my skin is getting better .. like im glad ur face is getting better

you must be finally doing something to it . its like really is that a compliment ... people suck. I hate how they think they have a right to comment my skin .. I feel like im being judge on my skin not on my work.

people are so rude.. I sometimes wish they also had acne so they can know how hard it is .. that is not as simple as washing ur face like they think..

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hope27

I actually believe in antibiotics anything to make ur self feel better. hating ur looks is not healthy for ur self esteem of ur health . u get depression , anxiety , lack of sleep . so many other things.

I only wish I could take them.. I am allergic to antibiotics . made this whole acne thing more depressing for me. one derm told me I would have been cleared along time ago if I was not allergic to antibiotics ...

creams only helped but never made my skin cleared..

so I think you should just take them if they can help you be happy with your looks . lets face it if we all had cleared skin we would all be 100% more happy and out going . not spending money and time on our skins.

or having to deal with peoples stupid comments about how we look .

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tanna23

It's amazing how many people think it's a simple as just washing your face, and how condescending they can be with their "advice"

I'm scared of what happened last time I came off the antibiotics happening again. I broke out in places i never did before when I stopped. I still have them in my house and everyday I keep wondering if I should. I also feel sick when I use them, but mentally I feel better. so I might. I have a 6 month supply, i'm hoping that's enough time to find a doctor to put me on something that can stop that breakout that happens after and I could stay on the pills for about a year.

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