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My Plan B: 1 Month & 19 Days... What If?



So... my skin is breaking out again. There wasn't a drastic progress in the past month or so and now I am experiencing another round of break out. I am not sure if it's because it is still purging or what. But I have been thinking lately that.. what if I am going to suffer from acne for the rest of my life? I feel like I have been controlled by acne in the past several years. It seriously dictates my mood and I don't like it. I really want to be able to love myself for who I am. So I have been thinking that, maybe it's time for me to accept this truth. I have been trying so hard to get rid of acne. But in the end, I am just not that girl with flawless skin. I have flaws and the acne problem is my biggest insecurity in life. Maybe it's time for me to love myself, with or without acne.

Anyways, having said that, let me just summarize my progress so far. I have been breaking out with ACTUAL pimples. I guess that's just because I haven't been popping my whiteheads. After a while they sorta inflamed. So anyways, I have another new one on my left cheek along with a small one on my upper lip and another one on my right cheek. I popped a HUGE one on my chin but I think it is still a bit inflamed. I'll see how it goes in the next couple of days. The big huge cyst on my brow hurts a lot and it is quite inflamed. Good that it's on my brow area and I could hide it with my hair. In terms of scar, there are scars but not too problematic because I haven't been getting rid of my whiteheads like I used to. My blackheads actually improved a lot. There are almost NO blackheads on my nose. There are still SO MANY whiteheads around my chin and my upper lip. They just won't go away. And I realized I am starting to get whiteheads on my cheek here and there. I don't know what's wrong with me and I am not sure if this regimen will ever work. If it doesn't, the worst case is for me to accept and move on.