Everything is in point form; I'm not done loathing myself.
- got home
- looked into the mirror and LOST IT
- Can't explain it, just got into a head space and nothing I did could wrench me out of it
- FUCKED up my face.
- And cried, and cried, and cried, and cried, and cried.
- I disappointed everyone, including myself.
- I OBLITERATED any progress I made as well as my self-esteem toward body image
- I feel ugly, and so ashamed of myself.
- the elastic snapping no longer works
- and I have no idea how to make the inflammation go away quickly
I'm crawling under my covers and not leaving.
I'M SO TIRED OF FUCKING UP!! I DON'T WANT TO PICK ANYMORE!!! WHY CAN'T IT JUST CLEAR UP??
AND WHY CAN'T I STOP!?!?