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Not Myself Anymore. Giving Up

Liam Foster

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So i was prescribed 100mg of doxy capsules about a month ago now and i have done the first month, ive also been washing my face with clean and clear advantage wash and bee applying BP. Now the first couple of weeks of doing this the big red pimples started to slowly fade away and i thought my dream had come true, i was wrong. First my face started to peel and go crazy red! And to this present day my face is just simply awful. My forehead i feel like just ripping off, nothing i do will make the acne go on there!! I have not only got red lines going across my forehead but acne pimples and peeling and major redness! And now i dont know why but my cheeks are getting more red! I dont know if its scarring or pigmentation or both but i can run my fingers across my cheek and its so smooth but they are patches of pigmentation and scarring all over them and it is so noticable! I am honestly beginning to give up now, acne has finally changed me as a person, i didnt think it was possible but it has. I admire people's encouragement on here telling me to hang in there etc but i honestly can't. Every single morning i wake up and nothing changes! No matter what i eat, or apply! It's weird how certain smells can bring back up old memories and last night i went out my house and caught this really summery freshly mown grass smell that took me back to when i was younger and played football in the fields with my friends. I used to love being outgoing! I used to everywhere with my grandad. But now, your lucky to see me with my curtains open, i just sit in darkness. I hate the light because it shines on my face and reveals all of my pain. My hair is so fucking long because i just cant bear going to hairdressers!! It would be my worst nightmare!! FUCKING HATE LIVING LIKE THIS!!!! And to make matters worse, my grandma who i cant tel you how close i am to her, has been took into hospital, so thats fucking with me as well. Iv'e never been lucky in my life, and i honestly can't see my acne getting better. Yes i only have about 4 active pimples atm, most on my forehead but the scarring redness peeling and other shit on my cheeks etc just wont go! I honestly look like iv'e been in a house fire or something. Feel like taking a long walk, get lost and never come back.



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Not overly sure what to suggest to be honest mate - it's almost impossible to gauge it without seeing it. Might be worth cutting back on the BP though if your skin's getting really red. It may not be a bad thing is it's peeling though, if the new skin underneath in good them in time your scarring will go down.

Do try and keep your head up, don't let acne win. Certainly don't let it get in the way of visiting your grandma or things like that. It's important to spend time with the people we care about, regardless of how we may be feeling ourselves. My granddad passed away just over a year ago and he was one of the few people I felt close to so I've got an idea of what it's like when someone you care about so much isn't doing very well. So here's hoping that your grandma's on the road to recovery very soon.

:)

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You sound a lot like me, hey, We would probably make great friends..

"your lucky to see me with my curtains open, i just sit in darkness. I hate the light because it shines on my face and reveals all of my pain." I do this and I also shower and bathe in darkness, I hate the lights in bathrooms. Makes my face look as though I've been attacked with a lawnmower.

I like you bud, You sound like a cool guy, Don't let acne win, I'm definitely not. I just fucking rage all the time, I have my moments.

"Feel like taking a long walk, get lost and never come back." I feel as though I've took my long walk and have become attacked by swarms of bees and fucking horrible insects and shit, But fuckkk.

Chin up mate, I should too...

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Yeah i'm definitely not going to let it get in the way of seeing my grandma Paul mate, and tbh my cheeks dont have any active pimples, its just post acne marks! Like blotches and stains underneath my skin. And Novo i respect you man, it's not just a physical pain but a much more in depth mental pain. Not being able to live your life the way you want to is one of the hardest things ever, if not thee. If i could get rid of the acne on my forehead i'd be a a lot happier but that just will not budge! And my social life has gone to shit now, but because i've been like this for so long, it doesn't bother me and i prefer doing everything alone! Some people get lucky i suppose mate, we just gotta stick at it!

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I know exactly how you feel, well maybe not EXACTLy, but I know that acne may seem like a curse (and for the most part its hell), but that acne has made me who I am in a way. I went from being an outgoing, loud person to a shy, quiet girl, but I know that acne is not going to ruin my life and that's why i'm on accutane. Doxycycline never worked for me, I didn't have bad side-effects like you, but it just did NOTHING for me. I suggest going to a dermatologist telling them you're fed up with your acne and want to know what's your're next course of action. That's what I did & I got accutane!

Sorry if I was just rambling and this didn't help!

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