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Nov 30



Okay so it's been almost 3 weeks since I last posted. I'm still doing good. I broke out a little on the left cheek, but it healed rapidly. I'm not so worried about breakout anymore as they are so minor.

To be honest, I've be slacking a little with applying the atralin gel. I guess because I'm not worring so much I just get lazy and forget to apply it. i saw a recent pic and my face looks so smooth and young, I just can't believe it. I get a little depressed when I look in the mirror and see the scars. I'd just wish that they would go away faster, uhhhhhhhhhhh. Yeah Yeah I know, I need to use the atralin.

Yesterday I saw a young man and noticed he had indented scars on the side of his face. But I noticed them for about a second and got lost noticiing how handsome he really was as a whole. The scars just added a little something more applealing, plus his musical talent and good looks made his scars disappear.

I wish I could look at myself that way. Is it because I haven't learne to accept me for who I am because in'm still waiting for my scars to disappear physically. Why do I have to notice every detail flaw that I have? Why am I so hard on myself. Do I need to fall in love with who I am. Am I superficial? Why am I always looking for perfection when I know it doesnt' exist. Not just in my apppearance, but with everthing.

Dont get me wrong, I'm happy with my results. i thank God that I live worry free of acne. But I always fee that I could be better...."only if"

One thing I know for sure is that if it' wern't for acne, I'd probably be an arrogant person self centered person.


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