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Square One, We Meet Again




so, i haven't posted on here for a long time. if anyone is reading this is bothered about catching up on my other posts, you'll see that i wanted to move to london by the end of september last year. i did.

it's been okay, nothing great.

my skin has improved greatly from when i was last posting and it seems to have been under control if anything. there have been times where i've had nothing to worry about for weeks and weeks, and times where my face has been a mess and i've been a hermit hiding away from the world.

i've been unemployed for just over a month and a half or so. i have a job waiting, but they're doing security checks and stuff so it's taking a while. i've realised i need a routine because for some reason it keeps my skin clear.

i've been largely doing nothing while i've been unemployed, sitting at home on my laptop or playing my ps3. my sleeping pattern is messed up where i see myself going to bed at like 2am and getting up at midday. my skin has been pretty crap for a few weeks now and it's really getting me down. like, really getting me down. it's not been very helpful that i've not been doing much with my time either.

i know it'll improve when i get back into a routine but for now i'm in a rut and can't see the light. i've booked an appointment with a doctor for thursday. i've been taking lymecycline on and off for 4 years now and while i've had things largely under control this year when i've had a routine and stuff, it's not been perfect. recently it's been far from it.

i'm gonna see if i can get something stronger and try make a case of accutane. i dunno if i'm a candidate for that as it's not as bad as people who usually get that prescribed, but the condition of my skin is a major contributing factor to my moods and overall outlook on life.

i've had an eating disorder for over 3 years now because of my skin and i take too much ibuprofen to reduce inflammation which i'm pretty sure isn't good for me. well, i know it's not. you're told not to take more than 3 a day of 400mg ibuprofen and i've been taking 8 a day quite consistently. this can't be good and i've not told anyone this. my doctor needs to know so i can finally sort all this crap out.

'til again.


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