So I had this amazing revelation last night. Although my skin is still far from perfect, and who knows if it ever will be besides the Good Lord... I realized that the way I am seeing myself and others is starting to change now that my face is clearing more and this is just due to my own perception of myself.
I find myself looking people in the eye when I speak to them up close without thinking... They are SO thinking about that massive ZIT on my face... or... Her face is One massive zit!!I i find myself letting people in more, almost like I trust others more now that I feel better about myself? I find myself putting myself out there more... getting involved more in activities where i would usually want to hide away, especially DAYTIME activities where every little or NOT SO little bump would be all that was on my mind when i was with people.
Its amazing what we are prepared to do to ourselves, its like we abuse ourselves by wanting to hide away and miss out on life because this thing called acne stands in our way... or does it? is it not just our own perception or us standing in our way to a greater life? are we not just holding ourselves back because we FEEL ugly and inferior?
wow deeeep i tell u,Yup im shocking myself too with this deeeep stuff!!
So back to my little story... I realized yesterday that when my husband looks at me now without makeup, I dont mind. I remember just 6 weeks ago when my face was in a red raging bumpy mess that not only did i want to hide away but i also didnt want him to look at me, it made me feel worse, i felt uglier... how sad i know he loves me and doesnt care about red marks but it was all meeee and my silly perception, anyway bottom line is that Its so cool to feel like hey he is állowed'to look at me now without me feeling super duper ugly.
I have also found myself spending more time in gods word just seeing what He has to say about us little humans and how much he loves us ( no matter what we look like) this too has helped me gain better perspective on what this lifes about and I can tell you one thing - Its not about meeeeee
So try enjoy life regardless of acne because you are beautiful and prized by the King, lets try focus more on this inside and less on outward appearances which are fleeting anyways