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Blah!

overcomingshame

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Day 1 of my blog thingy!

Hello all. :dance: Today is the first entry of my blog about my acne and skin picking problems. I'm 23 and have been dealing with acne since I was 15. It has ruined my self-esteem and affected my ability to be who I want to be. :( I have tried everything under the sun to combat my acne, including accutane in high school. It really cleared me up, but then I became super depressed so I stopped taking it.

A few weeks ago I went to a dermatologist to figure out what to do. I was getting super oily and breaking out in little clear bumps all over my forehead and my whiteheads were getting out of control. She said, "your skin looks good, what are you talking about?" *Lifts bangs and removes glasses* Ya, it looked like shit. My concealer must have been great everywhere else (Makeup Forever Full Cover Concealer-extremely pigmented and a little goes a long way! :dance: ). Anyways, we discussed hormones and she prescribed me YAZ and Spirolactone. My period was a ways off so I started the Spiro and it made me pee constantly and my boobs hurt so bad and felt even bigger (I'm already size 5 and a DD, so the thought of bigger boobs was killing me!) After a week my skin felt oilier and was exploding with zits and cysts, which I never had before. Oh hell no. :( I know there is an initial breakout, but I couldn't deal with the cysts so I stopped taking it.

That being said I popped the shit out of my face yesterday and today my skin is covered in scabs and red marks. I cried my eyes out last night. I'm hiding in my apartment and skipping work. :( Started the Yaz yesterday and awaiting the arrival of my Paula's Choice 2% BHA to combat those closed comedones i get all over my upper lip and by my nose. Until that arrives my current regimen is:

  • Purpose Gentle Cleaning Wash/Occasional gentle exfoliation with baking soda
  • Cetaphil Moisturizer where needed
  • Yaz BCP
  • Spot treat with BP and Burts Bees Tea Tree Stick at night
  • Milk of Magnesia Masks to combat oiliness
  • No dairy, limited sugar, no caffeine, lots of water, high omega 3 foods, clean diet
  • Only wear concealer and loose powder on my skin: obsessed with red lipstick too!

Trying to be extra careful when washing because of the scabs. I want them to stay scabby and fall off on their own. I look like a monster, but its my own doing. :wacko: Birth control has cleared me up before so I hope this works. I really need stop analyzing my face for flaws and picking apart my zits. I struggle with this skin OCD, and I really want to be free from thinking about my skin 382283741 times a day. If this doesn't work, I will go back to the derm for other ideas, maybe topicals or accutane, although my skin is not bad enough for that. I want to enjoy my summer, make money at work, feel beautiful, go out on dates with my boyfriend, and be free. I guess that is all for now. Hope this BHA arrives soon!

Much Love :cool:



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I know what you mean about the boyfriend and job. I regret always declining daytime patio dates with my boyfriend because I am self conscious about my acne, especially during the day. Even the job situation, I am so unmotivated to go out there and be outgoing and perky when I feel so ugly. I have mild-moderate acne and am taking the accutane route. Hope everything works out for you!

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