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Oooohh boy.

SocialAnxiety

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Just... wow.

i'm amazed at myself right now.

so first, i ended up cleansing my face with murky, disgusting bath water because my mom bought a new soap, and i decided to try it (BAD IDEA), It colored the water this murky, sickly grey color, and made my skin feel horrible, so me being me, i decided to go ahead and use that water to wash my face (i usually do it from the focet when i shower, but i was too lazy to turn it on)

Anyway, so my skin had this weird film on it (like the rest of my body) so i rinsed and rinsed over and over with the same gross water, rubbing and scratching and pressing until i just gave up, got out of the bath, went into the other bathroom and started to CONTINUE to rinse my face, rubbing more flakes because they kept popping up, and i noticed a THICK layer of them on my chin (where i have this puss-scab on the zit there)

so i'm like, well, i'll rub around it, and i ended up popping that sucker, And squeezing HARD, Trying to get the puss out, silly me, i forgot they don't usually have puss, just a little blob of hardened goop in them, so i tore up some cardboard (the only thing available) and DUG in the bloody, dripping mess that was my zit.

blood was literally POURING down my chin, all while i was thinking to myself (I better stop, i seriously should stop now)

So i'm sitting here with a peice of toilet paper on the weeping, bloody hole that was my zit, and i'm just kind of... bleh.

I'm not usually a picker, let alone a SAVAGE picker like i was a minute ago, nor did i get any kind of -satisfaction- while doing it like most pickers do, but i'm also not really upset, just kind of meh, hopefully i wont break out, but i'm really amazed at how horrible i was to my skin just now.

if the next post i do is me whining about a massive breakout, well, then you all know why.



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