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may 3rd 2010

Mulatana

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Today, it's may 3rd and I'm so desperate with my acne; I'm 23 and I had acne for the last 10 years or so. I'm getting so sick and tired of looking like crap everyday, I feel like life does'nt worth beeing lived anymore... I can't go out, I don't wanna do anything, I don't want to see my boyfriend cause I'm scared that he thinks I'm ugly, I don't want to see any of my friends either and even not my family cause I know that my acne is the first thing everybody notice when they look at me. Seriously, I know this sounds pretty stupid and selfish but sometimes I think (a little bit) of comiting suicide. I know appearance is'nt erverything in life but acne is a constant psychological pressure that decrease my self-estim to the point where I'm fucking lonely all the time while I know I'm a naturally social person. I'm writing this blog almost for myself, just to keep track of my life and to complain somwhere when I feel like complainin cause my family is tired of me complaining.

I started minocycline 100 mg/day in october 2009 and I saw a small improvement in february 2010 but now it's getting worse again... Seems like it does'nt have any effect anymore. I'm also on Diane-35 since march 9 and my acne has gotten worse!!! I decided to take it without stopping it every month just in case the effects would show faster... I'm gonna finish my third pack on may 17. :| I'm so desperate!



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