So apparently I'm playing in a concert Saturday and I'm rehearsing all day tomorrow. Kk. >w<
If I wasn't doing that I'd be doing homework and cleaning so big whoop.
As for my skin I've been touching it too much. I rested my face on the back of a chair and left little specks of white debri all over it. I'm very tired and am probably going to be even worse tomorrow. I need to shower,...ugh,...I've also been having more emotional issues lately. Its probably the lack of sleep but sometimes I'm all happy for no particular reason adn then others it feels like my lungs are failing to absorb oxygen or whatever that does,...almost like I'm drowning yet I can still breathe. Then I get kinda dizzy and hungry and tired,...and depressed. blah. Whatever.
I wish something special would happen.
Kind of feel selfish to wish that for myself,..
but for some reason it seems like I always watch everyone else find who they want to be with, or what they want to do in life, or best their personal record in track. I love music,...but its almost like eating the same food everyday,..it gets boring after a while.
I don't want to take a break though. I CAN'T take a break. What I really want to do is a sport but my health won't allow it. I know I've reached my low, I may be living it.
Hopefully things really can't get worse.
I just feel so empty. Like I need some variety in my life.
Entering a story in the literary magazine did that for me,...but thats over now.
New Hobbies, new or renewed Flings, new food, new classes, new routine,..
I can try to wake up late tomorrow!
Only issue is the regimen. I CAN'T sleep in. I barely have enough time for it as it is.
Plus I have to walk so I have to leave that much earlier.
I might be able to make it if I'm up right at 6:30am.
I don't know what an extra half hour of sleep will do but,..least its variety.