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Week Two: Day Fourteen//Stupid Dentist and Friendship Lost

TTPW4227

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Okay so today I was definitely a bit luckier :( I don't remember how but I was. It was also entertaining at lunch today, a guy and I were talking about Accutane and stuff and my friend was like "So do you guys normally talk about zit medication?" haha. Kinda. Not really, its just interesting to know someone who's doing what you almost did. He's doing splendid on it too and his face is clearing up pretty good, month two. I'm not even through the first month of my regimen treatment so its too soon to tell but it will get better!! Also I AM under more stress,...I think I lost a friend, I have to spend a gagillion hours to fold all my clothes since I can't hang them, and I have a ton of homework and some laundry to do today. Stress in the week would be emerson, wondering if I should do solo ensemble, practicing for next honorband, getting forms signed, how much its going to suck to miss running tomorrow because I have to go to the stupid dentist and get my teeth cleaned, ugh. Fortunately I have gym and its a fitness day, so hopefully we'll run the perimeter or something and I'll be able to push it hard to try and make up for missing running. I'll be sure to ask someone to tell the coach I had to go to a dentist appointment. Oh well. I missed my last one so,...would be kind of sad to miss this one too and I don't have a choice. As for the friend,...I miss him so much. But he took my forgiveness for granted. I wonder if he knows an apology would make me willing to forgive him. But we went from good friends to on and off crusher and user. I'm the crusher, he's the user. I thought he liked me but I think he was just going out with me to make someone else jealous,..though idk because of stuff he said and did while she wasn't there. But soon he was spending all his time with her that he used to spend with me, I gave several warnings and eventually loss motivation,..for life in general. So I dumped him before it got really bad, appalled he was so flatline about the phrase "I never want to talk to you again". It hurts so much to cut him away.

I feel,....

Empty

Like I can do anything but,..I don't care anymore

Its been nearly two months since the fact

I hope it really gets better

Maybe that will as soon as my skin does :(


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