Just for the updates.. so over the last few days my acne did improve..I also started using retina A...however in last 1 week my skin has taken a sudden turn and all of a sudden I am breaking out again..I finally thought I am making some progress and then this happens.. anyways I will try to keep the blog updated.. it's just that my heart breaks everytime I write the same negative update.. still waiting for that one positive update that I can give to everyone.. if hell is real then it's here
Skin still bad.. I think I am going to do next update only if I see some positive improvement..thr is no point is updating the blog with the negative effects.. let's hope I make some positive update soon.
Still getting small little red bumps on my face which make the overall texture of my skin pretty bad.. so I am completing 7 weeks tomorrow and 2.5 weeks on dapsone.. I am emotionally and mentally more stable now.. I don't think my face has changed at all in past 7 weeks.. if I compare it has got a little worse.. let's hope for some good results in upcoming weeks..
Got few more tiny pimples..they are slight red..I feel my skin is more dry and my red marks are more prominent today..I have like 15 of them so it's pretty hard looking at them like this.. I am feeling a lot tired since yesterday.. honestly I give up.. I don't think it's working.. I don't care what happens..I think I should just accept it as my fate...
It's been 1.5 months!! Phew... I feel like it took forever for me to get here.. i really need to work on my emotional issues .. anyways I tried a little experiment.. I tried to take 20 mg and 10 mg on alternate days.. I noticed that everytime I take 20 mg my skin gets a little worse.. so I have decided to stick to 10 mg.. I am still getting breakouts.. I feel a little better emotionally.. although I do panic randomly sometimes.. it's like all I need a small random stupid reason and it triggers my emotions...
My face hurts all the time.. :(.. it's like I can feel my face...my stupid skin is so sensitive to sun..I go out for like 15 min and I get PLE lesions.. I have got so many tiny red bumps on my face..I had the same issue last month and my derm had prescribed me some hydrocrotisone cream for 3 days which had helped a lot.. I want to use that again but I read online that it should not be used for more than 7 days.. I think I need to go back to Doctor..this is so fucking hard.. . I frequently update my blog these days.. I hope that 2 months from now when I look back and go through my blog I don't regret going through the emotional and physical pain caused by the medicine..I have realized that the emotional scarring cause by acne is much greater than the physical scarring..
My face is getting just worst and worst..I hate this..I don't think I can handle the IB part..I don't want to get out of my bed..I don't want to stop accutane because that is my only way out but it sure isn't easy..I hate what acne is doing to my life.. it's ruining me and my self confidence...
So I have completed my week 5 on accutane.. I feel as if time has freezed.. and low dose accutane is like slow poison :P..you don't know if it going to work or not and you just hope for things to start getting better.. anyways I have got few more little pimples pop on my face.. I am on my period so that could be one of the reason.. but my face does look messed up... Although the new pimples are less inflamed and small...there may be a slight improvement in my marks.. I am not sure..I might be just imagining things because I am so used to seeing acne marks on my face that I don't really remember how it looked like and can't tell the difference..I feel okay and stable today..skin is more dry and I do feel tired a lot but no other new side effects. ..
I am so messed up.. I am not sure if it's the accutane or if I was already depressed .. but I am definitely not in a good state of mind.. it feels weird writing personal stuff on this site but it gives an outlet to my feelings.. I was having a discussion with a guy today and he mentioned how looks are important in relationships and the thing is I have stopped feeling beautiful after I had the bad breakout and I was left with all the red marks on my face. It made me wonder if I will be alone for the rest of my life..his comments depressed me even more..Is it the end of happiness for me?.. I really need to get a grip on my thoughts.. I was already an emotional person and I feel accutane has messed up things a little more for me..I can't wait for the process to get over..
So I officially completed 1 month mark yesterday. I visited my derm and he decided to keep me on 10mg dose.. my face is more red and I was seeing some improvement in my marks before but they seem to be more red now.. I have got dry Patches on my face..I am not sure if it is eczema or not..my derm said it is due to sun sensitivity and he had prescribed me a topical steroid cream for 3 days.. he has also changed my night cream to dapsone.. overall I had lot of small pimples on my face past week..it seems to have calmed down a bit.. funny thing happened yesterday.. I went to office yesterday and I was interviewing a guy .. I was in thr for 1 hour and when I came out I had 2 new red pimples.. maybe the guy cursed me or something.. but I didn't have anything when I went in to take interview and when I came out I had 2 red small pimples.. overall my condition is worse when I started accutane..I am now contemplating if it was a correct decision or not..I cried for 2 hours straight today ..I hope I don't end up with dry patches on my face due to accutane today.. this process is definitely not easy.. its like gambling with your face...Am I pushing my luck a little too hard? Is the risk worth taking.. we will have to wait and find out..
So I am back from my 2 week vacation and I have returned with no new spots . So that's a win win for me :).. I had a Terrible lifestyle in last two weeks.. anyways no major change in my pimple or spots.. I have had few small pimples but they are either gone or visible only when you get really close to my face..I am following the same skin care routine I followed last week
When I started accutane I wasn't even sure it will show any results since I had less active breakouts but huge number of red flat spots on my face..but I have seen so many videos on you tube with results where accutane does clear out all the red spots and pimples.. I am a very impatient person and it's been really discouraging so far.. I know I shouldn't really expect a miracle to happen..it's very unrealistic but my dose is so low..I feel it will take forever for my skin to heal and I am kind of running on a clock here.. I think I may have gone a little crazy..acne is all that is on my mind now and I am sick of it.. I don't wear makeup at all and it take a hell lot of courage to walk out in public looking like that and people staring at you and judging you specially when you come from a place where you had a clear skin.. I know you are not your acne but it has really taken a toll on my self esteem..I have actually been rejected twice because of my acne..I never realized it but the concept of BEAUTY IS SO FLAWED.. earlier when I had clear skin I never cared to notice people's scars or acne..infact I dated a guy who had lot of scars and pimples and I was surprised to see that I never noticed it untill recently when I found an old photograph. Anyone reading this please pray for me.. I hope this gets over soon..and sorry for rambling about it..I was feeling kind of low today
Quick update on my skin - not much has changed in last 15 days although I am getting few tiny whiteheads and bumps on my face. My lips are a little dry. I am on a 2 week vacation and I am eating out a lot and putting a lot of makeup on my face..my sister is in hospital so I stayed with her for few days. My lifestyle is pretty bad these days and I am hoping I don't get more breakouts when I am through this..I still have 7 more days to go..
the thing that sucks the most is red marks that are left once acne is gone..I hate them from bottom of my heart and they don't seem to be going anywhere..
As part of my skin care routine I am using the same facewash and moisturizer and I put faceclin and biluma in the morning and faceclin and peelite in the night.
I am basically on Day 9 of my Accutane journey. I haven't really noticed any changes in my acne marks. They are still dark red. i haven't got any new pimple as such but i already had few tiny pimples on my face which have now gone red and overall the texture of my face has deteriorated. I noticed slight dryness on my face and lips. No major side effects although i do feel hungry a lot after i started taking Accutane. I have been drinking atleast 2 ltrs of water daily since i started Accutane and i plan to increase the water intake to 4 ltr a day. Products used for 9 days- Cetaphil facewash, emolene Moisturizer, mix faceclin and TopMetro gel and apply it twice in a day (Morning and evening)
A little Background on my skin - I have Asian wheatish dry and extra sensitive skin. I started getting acne in Oct 2017 and they have left severe red marks on my face. Most of my red acne marks are flat marks (not scars). My derm has prescribed a low dosage of Accutane and he says it helps with red marks. The side effects should be minimum. I am a vegan but i am very fond of junk food. Rigorous exercise , bad eating habits and stress contributed to my acne formation. I tried turning raw vegan on 6th jan 2018 and did do it for 20 days but i again starting eating junk food from last 5 days. I am planning to go back to the raw vegan diet from tomorrow.