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Day 26

So today I've got a hurtful zit on my chin more near the center than where I get them usually near my jawline. Lathered the BP on there, expecting this to grow into a big one.
 also noticed a small Whitehead on right side of my chin - again put BP on there, hopefully this one won't turn big red and with a huge Whitehead but that's my luck these days

trying to remain positive - the more stressed out I get about these spots the worse it will get. I'm pretty sick & tired of feeling rubbish all the time. Want to go out with my friends tomorrow so I pray by some miracle my skin is ok!!

also have to confess - have been squeezing a few past couple of days. My spots scar regardless so I feel like squeezing them just speeds up the process... going to stop doing that now though. 

fingers crossed for the next few days. 






Day 24

Haven't posted in a while. I was hoping I'd be able to come back on here with good news, unfortunately not the case!

So since my last post my skin has seemed to improve, but not for long. Yesterday I had no active spots, yes lots of scars but I thought okay, maintaining this no-spot skin will be good and the scars will fade in time. However, woke up this morning to 4 new spots with a couple I can see probably braking through in the next few days. Gutted!!!

Couldn't stop myself from crying, I'm so fed up! This sort of thing makes me feel like the treatment isn't working for me. I know the course is 3 months but still having breakouts at this point can't be a good sign. The worst thing is the scars they leave in their wake; they get big and red, then when they're healing leave behind hyper-pigmentation. I can't say that this is 'purging' at this point since, although I've been on epiduo w/ differin for ~ 3 weeks, I've been using pure differin for ~2 months prior to this.

I pray that things improve this week. I feel like the universe is against me. I can feel my self-esteem getting worse everyday - I won't even leave the house anymore. Trying to not stress about it, I know my acne is stress-triggered, however getting break-out after breakout if really wearing me down. Wish I could try accutane. 





Day 8

Making this blog to vent my feelings. Prior to this current treatment tried doxycycline for 2 months with no improvement - since then my skin has gotten worse.

anyway, currently on lymecycline. Tried this one when I was 17 (22 now) so hoping it will work the second time. 

currently, my skin is awful - the acne was initially concentrated on just my right cheese/jawline but has since break to my left jawline. Woke up today with a bit on my forehead - first one I've had there in months. I'm getting worried.

need to find a way to ignore my acne. It's consuming my thoughts constantly. Exams are soon, and instead of worrying about them I am more concerned about having to face my peers with my disgusting skin.

current issues:

3 hurtful zits on my chin alongside limit scars - looks awful. Putting BP on them seems to bring the infection to the surface? I know I will wake up with at least 3 gigantic whiteheads tomorrow.

Zit on my forehead - hasn't happened for months, why now? I hope this isn't a sign it's getting worse. Can't keep crying over these issues everyday. Feel mentally drained and I won't leave the house.

praying things will go my way soon. I feel depressed.