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12.23.10 the beginning.

okay so i recently picked at my face, more severely than i ever have in almost the decade i've been doing it. its limited to a few places, mostly upper cheekbone area by ear&hairline on both sides, but its so deep.. seriously like massive holes in my skin. this was the last straw, i've never looked at my face in the mirror and wanted to cry so hard as i did the next day. i've made attempts to quit in the past, but they never lasted long. i thought that if i have a place to write everything down, it'll give me motivation to really keep it up. who knows, maybe i'll look back on this after a few months and really see a difference >.< soo, time to start this. i took 4 vitamins this morning, 2 nature's way ones that help with circulation, and 2 vitamin b complex with c. i'll take one of the teen girl multivitamins later when i eat again. spent most of the night drenching my wounds with neosporin with a q tip. found some bio oil in mom's room, i'll be sure to try that out later tonight/today. oh and i finally took the magnifying light up mirror out of my room, its just too tempting.. maybe after awhile i'll put it back, but i'll be sure to put post its all over it with motivational stuff that'll make me not want to pick. haven't picked today yet, but i really couldn't even if i wanted to, my face is still so sensitive because i really tore it up. mmm think that's about it for now, might update later tonight or something. ~




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