Soooo. I am back! Why am I back?? Because my acne is back. So I stayed pretty clear the last couple of years since my last entry, and then I had a baby! Can't use most acne products while pregnant AND you can't use most acne products while breastfeeding. So being pregnant and then breastfeeding for a year, that was almost 2 years of horrible horrible skin! With crazy hormones and all I just could not stay clear. I would say it was mild to moderate, but definitely still there. I would say the last 2 months have been really bad. I kicked my prescriptions to to curb (spironolactone and tazorac) and started to use natural products. Nothing is working. So I am back on my 30 day waiting period for round 2 of accutane. Am I a little apprehensive? Of course! But I am desperate at this point. My 30 days will be up on July 12th.
Current condition of my skin; not a lot of breakouts, just a lot of hyperpigmentation. I'm a picker. I have to stop this, but it is soooooooooo satisfying. I'm not one of those pickers that gets in the mirror and just goes to town. I'm an unconscious picker. I pick when I'm driving, I pick when i'm watching TV, I pick when i'm going to bed. I have to stop this. I know I am just making it worse, but I cannot help it. I need pickers anonymous. I'm so tired of this. I'm tired of always thinking about my skin! I'm 37 and I still have acne! When does this end?????? Oh and I wish people would stop telling me it's not that bad! You are seeing me with makeup on so yeah its not that bad then! But guess what???? I'd like a makeup free day where I don't have to worry about people looking at my skin! So here goes.....round 2!!!!
So I was doing EVERYTHING right! Washing my face with a gentle face wash, I was taking my antibiotics, using my Clyndamycin and my Taz and I was STILL BREAKING OUT!! About a year ago I started going to a weight loss Dr. He prescribed me Phentermine which I have been taking for about a year. About a month ago I googled Phentermine and Acne and low and behold I discovered it causes ACNE!!!!!!!! So I stopped taking it immediately! I have been off for about a month now and I have not had one breakout since! I am still using my Taz and my skin looks freaking amazing. I am no longer taking the antibiotics because I don’t feel that I need them anymore and I was very hesitant to take them in the first place. So please, please, please, even though the Phentermine helped me to shed an amazing 45 lbs. I would rather have clear skin, so if you are taking this medication and breaking out, it is because of this medication. Phentermine causes Acne!!! I can attest to this!!!!!! Ever since I stopped taking Phentermine I haven’t had one pimple!! I will never take it again, I don’t care how big I get!
Ok, so some of you may be thinking that I haven't blogged in soooooooo long because my skin cleared up amazingly and I didn't worry about it any longer, which meant I no longer would log on to this site.....WRONG!! DEAD WRONG!! I was so frustrated that I was continuing to break out that I just didn't want to talk about it!!! I had a derm appt last week and I told my Dr that I did not think the Taz .05% was strong enough for me and I wanted a higher dose. He bumped me up to the .1% and I feel that I am finally seeing results. I have been using the .1% for a week and I have no actives at all. My last breakout was really really bad so I have a lot of healed pimples but no new ones, so I'm happy. I also have made an effort to be more consistent with my Doxy which could be helping as well. I kept forgetting to take it, and the times I remembered to take it I had just eaten something with dairy which is a big no no!! I have taken it everyday as prescribed for the past week along with the Taz and my skin looks ok. Not perfect, not even close but better than the last couple of weeks. All I can do now is to continue doing everything I've been doing and hope to continue to improve!! Thanks for reading!!!
So boys and girls, we last left off with me about to go into week 11 of Taz and also going to the derm. Well first let's talk about my derm appt. So he was very hesitant to put me on Spiro since I am already taking Ocella, so he prescibed my Doxycycline (Antibiotic) which I was a little hesitant to take because of all the horror stories I've heard about antibiotics. But then I thought hey you've taken Tane what's a lil antibiotics gonna hurt! Well let me tell you the first couple of days I was sick as a dog everytime I took them. Now I'm fine, when I take them. I'm on my 2nd week of antibiotics and 13th week of taz. I can say that I have no active pimples. Healing ones but no actives. Ever since I began taking the antibiotics my skin has taken on a kind of dewy glow. Don't know could be the Taz since I have passed the magical 12th week mark! I can honestly say that I am happy with my skin right now. It's not perfect but it looks better! Also I discovered a new powder that I LOVE!!! Mac StudioCareblends Pressed Powder. Love it, love it, love it!! It's perfect, does not seem to break me out and is not to heavy and looks really natural. Covers red marks perfectly! If you like the Mineralize Skinfinish you will LOVE the Careblends. I found that the skinfinish was a little too red for me. I am in between medium plus and medium dark. Anyways so back to acne....My derm said he will only leave me on the doxy for a couple of months, hopefully when I come off I won't break out again! So between the Ocella, Doxy, Clyndamycin and Taz I am about 90% clear right now and hope to get even clearer. I am still using my Clarisonic which I love (helps with the flakes) and witch hazel also helps with the flakes as well. I am not even putting moisturizer on at night with the taz. I'm just applying it directly to my face and I am not flaking at all! Well that's my update for the week. Hope it helps someone because I have received so much good advice from reading the blogs on here. Thanks for reading
So it's week 10...Today I feel indifferent about my progress. When I put on my makeup I look freaking amazing and I'm like wow...Taz is really working. When I take it off, I'm like whoa maybe not. I actually only have like 1 active right now that is actually healing pretty quickly and will probably be gone by tomorrow. Pimple wise I'm actually doing pretty good. I don't have as many as I did in weeks 7,8,and 9. What I really have now is a whole lot of hyperpigmentation which I hope will soon start to fade as well. Witch Hazel and Emu Oil are my new best friends! I have not been dry or flaky since I have been using them. I have a derm appt tomorrow so I am hoping to get a prescription for hydroquinone and anything else he recommends for my dark marks. So anxious to get to week 12! I am so hoping this will really be the turnaround for me. One thing I have noticed this past week is my skin is getting lighter and lighter like when I was on Tane. Which is cool, no problem with that but towards the end of me being on Tane I got sooooooo pale! My pores are getting smaller and smaller, and I no longer have blackheads on my nose. I have a couple of closed comedones on my forehead that I would just looooooooove to squeeze but I'm leaving them alone. I noticed whenever I do this they turn into really big angry pimples. I would just rather it go away on its own. I have really been picking the shit out of my face which I know is so, so horrible. I have been really wanting to get a glycolic peel so I have reasoned with myself that if I don't pick, I get to have a glycolic. So far I have not picked all day! Yay!
Not really worried about the peel and Taz because I used to get peels when I was on Retin-A and what I would do is just not use it for two nights before and two nights after and I have always been fine. I wonder if my derm will keep me on the .05 cream or give me something stronger. I'm not really burning, stinging, or flaking so I'm hoping maybe he will. We'll see!!! Thanks for reading!!
Ok so week 9!! Week 8 sucked balls i mean really really sucked balls! Both of my cheeks and jaw line were covered in active pimples. I had about 7 or 8 on each side. I was almost really literally about to give up on Taz. I didn't even have an IB this bad when I was on Accutane, which I attribute to using Retin-A up until the point I started Accutane. Anyway's last week I was so flaky and dry, my makeup looked horrible, I had all these pimples and I just wanted to scream. I even stopped using my Clarisonic because my face was so sore from the pimples. I had started using the oil cleansing method with jojoba oil, but I was still flaky. I also believe maybe I'm one of those people who break out from jojoba oil. Maybe I was using too much, maybe I didn't do it right. Don't know but I'm staying away from jojoba to see if that was the problem. Ok so this week, week 9, much much better! I actually made some changes to my routine so I don't know if I'm doing better because of the changes, or because I'm getting closer to the 12 week mark.
Wash w/ Purity with Clarisonic
Tone with Witch Hazel
Sunblock SPF 50
Prewash makeup off with Purity as gentle as possble
Olay Gentle Foaming Facewash w/ Clarisonic
Tone with Witch Hazel
After 30 mins Tazorac
After 30 mins Emu Oil
The Witch Hazel and the Emu Oil have totally revived my skin. I was a little wary about the witch hazel only because it contains alcohol, but I've been totally fine with it, does not burn or anything. I have zero flakes and zero dryness right now. I also have no active pimples, just lots of healing ones. My marks are fading quickly, not totally gone, but def less inflamed and red. I'm black, but a light brown complexion, so my marks tend to me more red, than brown. My skin is not oily, but not dry. It's the right balance and I am very happy. I read on here how emu oil is very good to use in conjunction with Taz. I also read on here about witch hazel helping with flakes, and restoring your ph balance. That has helped as well. I have no flakes and no dryness, which last week I was all flakes and extra dry. The only thing that wasn't dry was my forehead and nose which were extra oily, so basically I had oily forehead, oily nose, and dry flaky cheeks. I looked like crap!!! Ok so I have still been picking. I know it is sooooooooooo bad, but I hate when your pimples get that dry scab, I just have to peel it off! I've started to put aquaphor on the healing pimples, and that seems to be helping as well. I am making a very conscious effort starting today to no pick!!! I have a derm appt next week, and I am going to ask for a refill on my hydroquinone, which I used while on Tane for my dark marks. Depending on how next week goes, might still ask for Spiro, not really sure yet. Taz has made me skin really really smooth. My pores are getting smaller and smaller, and now since I am no longer dry, my powder goes on so smooth and looks great all day. I hope to continue to improve as I get closer and closer to 12 weeks which is supposed to be the magic turnaround number. Oh I totally forgot I am also on Ocella so this could possibly be a contributing factor as well to my IB and my clearing. Hopefully week 10 will be even better!!!
So I was trying to wait until I had some great news before I posted again, but it looks as if I am still waiting for great news! Anyways skin the past two weeks has been up and down. My boyfriend told me about 2 weeks ago that my skin was really clearing up and that it looked great. Then about 2 days later I had like 5 new pimples! I didn't really freak out because I was basically not getting my hopes up to much because I know how up and down this process is. Right now I have about two new pimples on the underside of my jaw which is weird because that's like my 3rd one there and I never break out there! The previous 5 from a couple of weeks ago are gone but of course they had to leave a lovely scar as a reminder. My skin has gotten way way way more drier. I have been heavily relying on my jojoba oil and my CeraVe cream. I have also been putting aquaphor on my healing pimples because I hate that dry scab thing that they get! Right now I won't say my skin is good, but it's not bad. It's just ok for now. Hopefully these two new ones will go away really soon because they actually really hurt! Hopefully next week will be a better one!
Soooo week 5. Hmm well right now I will say I'm kind of indifferent to my skin right now. It's not looking all that hot but not horrible. I seem to get about 1 or 2 new pimples a day but they seem to go away in about 2-3 days. Started to get a little bit of dryness around my mouth which is my usual spot for dryness. My Gyno gave me Ocella which I started this past Sunday. I actually like it so far. The bc I just got off of Reclipsen, always made me nauseous soon after taking it. So far with the Ocella I don't have that same feeling. I also started using Skin Tight Extra Strength. I read on another members blog how she has been using that and it has helped her tremendously. I actually purchase it for my boyfriend for ingrown hairs he gets from shaving. I had no idea it could be used for acne. So far I have about 2 new actives, and about 10-12 healing pimples. This past weekend I felt a little down because my face was just looking horrible, but I just have to remember it is all a part of the process. I hate when you finally think you're done with your IB then you wake up to new pimples! I'm hoping that these two new ones will be the last ones! I'm starting to get really peely so I see that the Taz is really working. My skin where there are no pimples looks really smooth and even. Hopefully the coming weeks I will show more and more progress. I also started taking a pro-biotic because I read this also helps with acne. I am doing whatever I can to defeat this shit! Just read also that drinking apple cider vinegar helps too. Will be picking some of that up as well. I can see why so many people stop using things before they give it time to work for them. My face actually looks worse than before I started using Taz, but I am not going to let that deter me. I will continue to give it time to work just as I did with Accutane.
Ok so I am on week 4. My skin right now has a lot of things going on! I'll start with the bad. I am breaking out a lot more. I have about 5 or 6 pimples on my forehead. One is a white head which by the way I have not popped! I also have 1 on my left cheek which actually is going away pretty quickly and about three on my right jaw line which seem to be healing pretty quickly as well. The good-today after I put my makeup on (just MAC pressed powder) my face looked pretty darn good actually. My skin looks a lot more smoother and even toned. Usually when I put on my powder I can still see my huge pores, dark spots, and about 3-4 hours later my face is either peeling, greasy or both. Today it just still looks really smooth with the exception of the pimples. The areas without pimples look really smooth almost airbrushed. My pores are less noticeable and my makeup stays on all day! I'm loving it (except for the still breaking out part). Once I finally stop breaking out and my skin starts really healing I feel my skin is going to look amazing! I am not having any burning, peeling, or stinging from the Taz. Don't know if that's a good or bad thing. I'm thinking my skin might be a little tough just because of using Retin-A for years so maybe I need a higher dose of the Taz. Don't know but we'll see. Still waiting to hear back from my Gyno on the Yaz or Yasmin, and I'm still thinking of asking my Derm for Spiro. I've also added one little thing into my regimen that I think is helping. I've added a little drop of 10% BP wash to my facewash and that seems to be helping my pimples clear up pretty quickly. I am not dry or peeling so I feel my skin is not having a bad reaction to it at all. Nothing else major to report. Hopefully my next entry will have NO ACTIVE PIMPLES!!
Creeping towards the end of week 3. Yesterday I was so happy. I had no actives and I figured I was past my IB stage! WRONG! Woke up this morning to 4 new friends! Oh Pooh! Well not complaining. It's not as bad as how my skin was before Accutane, but I'm just really ready to be done with breakouts! I want to just focus on my scarring! Oh well! Anyways so no flakies, no excessive dryness which I'm surprised about because I was flake city with Retin-A! Maybe it's the Clarisonic?? Don't know. Hopefully these new friends will clear up as quickly as the ones that just left (about 3 days). I've incorporated some new things into my regimen.
AM--Wash with Purity/Clarisonic
Honey Mask (4 times a week)
Clean and Clear Dual Action Moisturizer
Peter Thomas Roth Sunblock SPF 30
PM--Take off makeup with Ponds Cold Cream for Sensitive Skin (This made my skin sooooooo soft and not dry!)
Wash with Olay Foaming Wash for Sensitive Skin/Clarisonic (Dry 10 Mins)
Dan's AHA (Let Dry 30 Mins)
Ever since I've added the AHA in my skin has been looking a lot brighter and smoother. I thought that maybe the combo of the Salicylic from the Clean and Clear, the Clyndamycin, and the AHA would have me dry but suprisingly I am not! My pores are also getting smaller and my skin looks smoother. I really hope that the Tazaroc works for me.
OK my rants for the week. I asked my Gyno if I could switch my BC to Yaz instead of the Reclipsen, or if I could get a prescription for Spiro (My Derm is on vacation). When I call the pharmacy I see that she did not give me the Spiro prescription AT ALL! Also I didn't get the Yaz she gave me a prescription for Mircette which is basically RECLIPSEN!! Hello that is not what I asked you for!!!!!!!!!! The point of asking for one or the other was because Yaz has the same ingredient as in Spiro. Reclipsen has been giving me migraines and it is obviously not helping with my acne so why give me another name brand of the same pill! So I fixed her ass! I have an old presciption of Yasmin that I will just refill and I will ask my Derm for Spiro on my next visit in Feb if I don't feel that Taz and Clyndamycin are working well enough. I really am convinced that I have hormonal acne. Most of my breakouts are on my jawline and my cheeks and I also remember the last time I was completely clear I was taking Yasmin (just had no idea what was in it, just got it because I thought the name was pretty..I know total dork!!) Anyways I hate Reclipsen. I would prefer Yaz or Yasmin. Hmmmmmm what else. My friend recommended I use Noxema! Really hmmmm....let me see....I tried that along with a million other things!!! Do you really think that I prefer going to the dermatologist and the pharmacy and trying all these different prescriptions because it's fun???? Do you really want me to go down the list of all the shit I've tried??? Clearasil, Oxy, Noxema. Proactiv, Nature's Cure, along with 5 million other OTC bullshit! How about you just don't recommend anything! Ahhh that just get's on my nerves! It's all good though when I'm clear and my skin is looking like the shit instead of shitty I won't need anyone to recommend anything to me!!!!!!!
Picking is bad. It really, really is....but picking on Tazorac is worse!! If you pick....STOP!! ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE ON TAZORAC..DONT PICK. Seems as if I should have known this from being on Accutane. I had a huge zit in the middle of my forehead. It had so much white goo inside I just had to do it. After I did that I had this horrible scab which I just had to peel off. Now I have this white/light spot on my forehead from where I peeled the scab. It is so ugly. I can't really cover it with makeup, I hate foundation, and powder just makes it look worse. Please don't pick, please, please, please. Ok so the condition of my skin. I would say about the same. I have currently about 3 new actives. Yesterday they really really hurt. They're on the right side of my face and they really really hurt but today they feel a little better. I didn't use my clarisonic today, and washed with some BP wash I had that I bought at Kaiser a long time ago. My forehead is currently clear as far as breakouts and so is my left side. It's this pesky right side that seems to be giving me trouble. I have noticed that my pores are looking a little bit smaller and makeup goes on smoother. i really feel like my skin is so weird. It's like dry, so then when I put lotion on by the end of the day it's so oily. Maybe I am using the wrong kind of moisturizer? I've used oil free moisturizer, combo moisturizer, dry skin moisturizer, and I always get the same result! I've even tried to go without moisturizer, but then my face is just dry. So I either have to choose between having a dry face or an oily face. I absolutely must find a moisturizer that is perfect for me. I used to use Clean and Clear Dual Moisturizer and really really liked that, but gave it up when I started using Accutane. Maybe I'll go back to it, but not sure because of the salicylic and don't want to dry out my face to much. As much as I love CeraVe, by the end of the day I'm a freakin oil slick! Also reconsidering my facewash. I used to use Olay Wash for Sensitive Skin when I was on Accutane, and I actually loved it. Don't know yet how I feel about Philosphy's Purity. It's cool, but I think once I finish this bottle, I will go back to Olay. As I'm sure we all do, I just want to find the right combo of products for me that gets me to clear skin finally!!!!!!!! Please Tazorac work for me!!! I so far have no complaints about Taz or Clyndamycin(which I actually used before but in the liquid form). Face is not too dry, and I have not been experiencing any burning or tingling or anything else I've heard people complain about. The first two weeks I just used the Clynd in the day and the Taz at night. Now I've been using the Clynd at night as well before the Taz, and it has not been too drying at all. I know I need to give it more time to work, but I'm just so anxious and I am considering asking my doctor to put me on Spironolactone. Anything but Accutane! Not to deter anyone from taking Accutane, because it was abolutely a lifesaver for my skin but it just didn't stay that way. If you are hesitant to take Accutane don't be. The side-effects for me were not very horrible at all. I just don't want to deal with the blood and pregnancy tests again every month, the answering the stupid questions online, and the pharmacy taking FOREVER to fill my prescription, so that is why I would rather not take it again. And I also don't want to be let down again. Being clear for a year, and then going back into the same cycle of breaking out! I just can't do it.
Take Care and Thanks for Reading!
So I let my success with Accutane keep me away from Acne.org. Once my skin began to clear up I totally stopped posting and I apologize for that. As you can see I am back. Why am I back? Because my acne is back. After I finished Accutane (April 2011) my skin looked beautiful. I still had some scarring, but for the most part I was completely clear. My derm put me back on Retin-A for maintenance purposes. That worked for awhile but about a month ago, I started breaking out like crazy. Excuse my french but the Retin-A wasn't doing shit! Oh Accutane you bitch, how could you do me like this? I was doing so well.
So I actually stopped the Retin-A and I am currently using Tazorac cream .05% and Clyndamycin Lotion. I am on my second week, and I will say that my skin looks really, really smooth, but I am breaking out places I do not normally break out! When I started Taz/Clynd I had about 9 actives on my forehead. Now I have 1 on my forehead, I have 2 under my chin (never broke out there before!), and one on the side of my nose, which is another place I don't break out. So currently I have 4 actives, which seem to actually be healing pretty quickly.
Oh and on a side note, the Accutane made my skin look amazing but after I got off (maybe about 3 mos later) I had tons of holes in my face. My pores were really huge, which was kind of dissapointing because I looked pretty flawless when I first got off.
So anyway back to the Tazorac. So I'm in my 2nd week. Going pretty good. A little dryness but I have always had weird skin that's dry/oily but not really combo skin (really weird to describe). Also I just got a clarisonic which I absolutely love! I have always had this problem with retinoids where no matter how much moisturizer I use, I have these flaky patches all around my mouth which is both disgusting and embarrasing. I haven't had this problem since I started using my clarisonic!
Ok so my current regimen
Wash w/ Purity Cleanser w/Clarisonic
CeraVe Lotion (or Cream depending on how dry I am) mixed w/ a little Jojoba
MAC Pressed Powder NC40
Wash w/ Purity Cleanser w/Clarisonic
CeraVe Lotion (or Cream depending on how dry I am) mixed w/ a little Jojoba (Wait 20 mins)
I'm also using Organic Raw Honey every other day after I wash my face in the morning as a mask. I wear it for about 30 mins. It really helps with the dryness from the Tazorac, makes my skin really really soft, and it's supposed to be good for killing bacteria.
So far I am really liking the Tazorac. After I got off Accutane, when I would use my powder it would kind of settle into my pores and make them look really noticeable. Since I have been using the Taz my powder goes on really really smooth and I don't look like a grease monkey by the end of the day.
Will keep you posted, and thanks for reading.
Oh something I just thought about....don't you absolutely hate when people say "OMG I have a pimple!" You have ONE pimple!! Try having a face FULL of pimples and see how you like that!!!!!!!!!!!! Or people who tell you, oh you should try this or that, ok hello. People with acne have tried tons of things. If it were that simple we wouldn't have acne! Do you really think that I actually CHOOSE to look like this?????? Really????
Sorry just my rant for the day!
So I'm at day 45...time has been flying I can't believe I am about to be done with my 2nd month pretty soon. This is so amazing. I was thinking that this process would be so long and drawn out and I can honestly say that is really not the case at all. So far I haven't been really noticing any changes I have been pretty clear and the only thing that has really been a little annoying is the dry lips. My skin has been dry but not unbearable. My nosebleeds have gone away, haven't really been stiff or sore anymore. Really nothing horrible to report at all which is a good thing. I have my 3 month appointment coming up and I'm not sure if I'm going to stay with the same dose or increase it. Well sorry this is so boring. I will leave with this...if you are afraid to take accutane, just do it. It is not as bad as people make it out to be. I honestly barely have any side effects and my skin looks great. I know accutane is not for everyone, but if fear is what has been stopping you, let that fear go! Thanks for reading!
So I got my new prescription today. I've been bumped up from 40 mgs a day to 80 mgs a day. My skin is getting so much dryer. I picked up the Cerave moisturizing cream because the lotion was just not cutting it anymore. Thinking of picking up some jojoba oil as well. So far not to bad of a break out. Got 2 new pimples on my forehead. One is hidden by my hair so I'm not really worried about it and the other is on my left temple next to the one I got a few days ago. I'm not really freaking out about it. I can deal with one pimple here and there. Hopefully I won't get tons all at the same time. Been drinking water like crazy. Last week I had a lot of dizzy spells but this week I'm feeling much better. I guess I have nothing else really exciting to post. I just hope I've already had my IB and my dose increase won't give me a whole new one!!!
Gonna make this a quick entry been really really busy....so far so good. Going to get my bloodwork done tomorrow. Dr appt on Wed.....my skin is looking pretty decent lately. I'm still breaking out but it's like one pimple every week or so. I currently have 1 active on my left temple. Yesterday it was a red bump, today it is a whitehead. It's gross and ugly but I haven't squeezed, picked, or popped. Other than that I still have the blackheads on my nose and they have this kinda bumby texture...I can't wait for those 2 go away! My skin is dry and it's getting lighter. I'm like a caramel color and now I'm turning a more light caramel. I guess that's alright but it makes my face look darker than the rest of my body when I put on makeup. I skipped a couple of days because I was having migraines (non tane related) and the nausea was just to much for me but I started back yesterday. I'm really liking the dryness of my skin, and the fact that my makeup stays on all day...no more greasy face! Scarring still there but it's getting lighter day by day. Still using my hydroquinone. I have started to notice a little stinging sensation when I wash my face, lips extremely dry, headaches occasionally if I do not drink enough water. LET ME STRESS THIS....EVERYONE SAYS THIS BUT I AM GOING TO SAY IT AGAIN FOR THOSE OF YOU LIKE ME WHO DON'T LISTEN....DO NOT PICK WHEN ON ACCUTANE!! I LEARNED THE HARD WAY!!!!!!!!!!! WHENEVER I DID THIS IT LEAVES AN UGLY BLACK SCAB THAT TAKES FOREVER TO GO AWAY!!! DO NOT PICK, DO NOT PICK............DO NOT PICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It ends up looking worse and then people ask "what happened to your face?" Don't do it!!!! Thanks for reading! Goodluck to my fellow taners and special shout out to Monkeeeeeeee and minifoxie...I'm thinking of u girls!
I must say these days seem to be going by pretty fast. I'm already on day 17...seems like a just started. Anywho, I am definately in my IB stage. I have this huge pimple right in the middle of my forehead, two on my left cheek and two on my chin. It seems everyday I wake up with a new one! They started of as these kind of flat flesh colored bumps and then turned into white heads. I will admit I did pop them...I know, I know and I also broke out my retin-a gel and spot treated them. The one on my forehead really bothers me because it's the biggest one and it is right in the middle and I feel like people are staring at it when they talk to me! The one on my chin actually started as one, but it brought a friend right next to it today! AHHHH!!! I didn't pop the new one yet. I'm just hoping that this is as bad as it gets. I will say that it's not as bad as some breakouts I've had, but it is pretty frustrating to go from clear to not clear...but we all kinda know what to expect when taking this medication. Haven't really had anymore headaches, lips are fine, skin not oily. I do find myself thirsty alot...and I don't really eat as much, I wouldn't say I'm losing weight, but I wouldn't mind! Nosebleeds have stopped. Some mornings I wake up a little stiff. Overall I would say I'm not having that bad of an experience. Hopefully it just gets better from here! Thanks for reading!!!!!!!!
My skin looks horrible today!!!!! I woke up this morning with 3 new pimples. Guess this is the beginning of my IB which I thought I was going to magically skip because I had been using retin-a...guess not...fudge!!!!!!!!!! I have 1 on my forehead and two on my left cheek..plus my face just looks horrible. All my scars look more pronounced and red. I look bad. How could I go from ok looking skin to horrible disgusting skin in one day??? Also the past two days I have been having nosebleeds, lips are dryer and my face feels kind of sore...especially along my jaw line...I feel that soreness when you know you're about to get one of those hard under the skin kinda cysts. Not looking forward to that. I don't know what possessed me to believe I would be one of those rare people who don't have an IB!! Oh I also forgot to mention when I woke up this morning my right hip was killing me. Like I could barely walk. The tane is definately in my system now, and it's definitaely making itself known! This sucks donkey balls! The only positive I have right now is my face is not oily...that's it. No more headaches...drinking plenty of water. I just hope these couple of pimples go away quickly and don't bring any friends with them. Thanks for reading!
So today is day 11 for me. I hadn't really been having a lot of side effects or anything but today I noticed some things worth noting. My lips were much much dryer than they have been since I started. Especially in the cracks on the sides. I've been putting carmex there, which has been working fine, until I eat or drink something, then I have to reapply. I am thinking it's about time I start using my aquaphor. I purchased it awhile ago but just haven't felt the need to use it just yet. Also still been having strange dreams and my bf says I've been snoring (which I'm guessing I don't usually), and he says I've been talking alot..not sure if this is tane related...oh and I've been super tired lately. I work swing shift 3 pm-11 pm, and I usually wake up around 8 am. But all this week I have been waking up at 2 pm, not giving me much time to get ready. Today I burned our dinner because I woke up around 12 put it in the oven, fell back asleep woke back up and it was basically on it's way to crisping oh well...anywayz back to acne related posting...so I switched back to my original mac sheer pressed powder...oh I missed it so dearly!! Doesn't cover as much as I like but me and foundation just don't get along. I'm hoping that I don't get so dry that I can't wear my beloved powder anymore. I have still been using my hydroquinone, which my derm said is fine as long as I'm not to dry. My skin is pretty oily still in the tzone area, but today I noticed the blackheads on my nose were more pronounced. I kept staring at them all day at work. Also my skin had this kinda glowy dewy look to it today. Not sure if it's because of the accutane or that I went back to my original make-up so I don't look all reddish today. One thing I'm not feeling is the no waxing thing. I waxed everywhere before accutane. Eyebrows, underarms,legs, bikini area...now I can't wax anything! I hate shaving, I hate nair..it smells! My eyebrows look atrocious!! I actually waxed while I was on retin-a which you're not supposed to do. I would just not put it on my forehead for like a week, then I'd be perfectly fine.... Oh well, might try threading. Currently I have one small active that popped up yesterday...I'm like great...besides the tiny blackhead I had on my forehead (which I squeezed yesterday btw...bad girl! bad girl...but no scar) I was pretty clear...is my IB starting? I guess we will see! Thanks for reading!
Ok so I haven't updated because I don't really have anything to update on really. Skin is doing fine right now. No actives really just a tiny little blackhead on my forehead that I want to squeeze soooooooooo bad, but I'm not going to do it. I have enough scars as it is and I don't want to be adding to them. Skin is pretty dry but not flaky yet. Lips dryer but not cracking yet. I been using off and on chapstick,carmex and burt's bees. Basically whichever one I can get to the quickest. I'm kinda sitting here just waiting for the dreaded IB so far nothing, I started off pretty clear due to the retin a and the Reclipsen so I'm just hoping that I will not even get an IB. Oh I ditched the Mac Mineral Powder. Hated it! Going back to my select pressed sheer. It makes me look really red and I hate it. I don't know if I picked the wrong color or what but I'm done with their mineral powder. Also got a sample of a mineral powder from everyday minerals. That was to red for me as well so that was basically a bust as well. Currently my routine is:
AM- Wash with Cerave Moisturizing Cleanser
Hydroquinone for my scars/dark marks
Cerave Moisturizing Lotion
Aveeno SPF 50 Sunscreen
PM-Remove Makeup with Vaseline
Wash with Cerave Moisturizing Cleanser
Hydroquinone for my scars/dark marks
Cerave Moisturizing Lotion
Hopefully I will have a better update next week. Thanks for reading.
Oh I forgot to mention that the first day I guess I didn't eat enough with my pill because it tore my stomach up. Day 1 and Day 2 I was drinking a combo of pepto and alka seltzer. Those were not good days. Also I had a horrible headache the first couple of days as well but drinking water makes them go away. Totally forgot about that! Just remembered because I currently have a headache....oh and I've been having really really weird random dreams, not scary just strange.
So today I picked up my first 30 day supply of claravis. I'm taking 40 mg once a day. Thank God for my insurance I only had to pay 15 bucks. I also picked up some cerave moisturizing face wash and the lotion because I already know I do not like cetaphil. I also got some aquaphor. So I took my first dose about an hour ago with dinner. I just washed my face with the cerave and that felt really good. My face feels really soft now. I put away my retin-a and all the other million products I use. I'm just going to stick to the cerave and use my hydroquinone for my dark spots. So far no side effects of course. I do have a little stomach ache but not sure if it's the accutane or just because I've not been feelin well the last couple of days. I currently have no actives thanks to my retin-a and/or the reclipsen. Just lots of dark spots from old acne. I was almost afraid my Dr wouldn't give me the accutane since I'm actually pretty clear right now. Hopefully I will stay that way. Well since I don't have much to report I will end this for the night. I will update soon as I have something to talk about! Thanks for reading.
Ok yesterday.....I picked when I got home from work....I couldn't help it...but today...I'm a little proud of myself. I have 1 active pimple as of today (it's a whitehead) and I did not pop it! Now I can't say I won't later but as of this morning I have not popped it or messed with it. I'm going to try to let it heal on it's own. Ok so something I discovered last night. When I wash my face at night I usually wash about 2 or 3 times to make sure I got all the dirt and makeup off. Well yesterday I started using this toner that has hydroquinone in it that my mom and grandmother both use. It's called maxi-peel if anyone's interested and it's in a green bottle. They order it off ebay. My mother has acne as well and my grandmother used to and has lot's of scarring. Anywayz both of their faces are looking really good lately so I figured I'd give it a try. It's supposed to be good for preventing pimples and lightening dark marks. Anywayz getting to the point of this...when I used to toner I looked at my cotton pad and saw that it was kinda dirty. There was makeup and dirt on it. I'm like wtf, so I get a new one and I keep wiping till the cotton pad is clear and then I'm like ok maybe my face is not as clean as I think it is after I wash it, and maybe just maybe this is why I'm continuing to break out!!! Maybe the retin-a would work better if I do a better job of washing my face (which I mean after 3 rounds it should be right?) So I'm thinking I need a better face wash and I will continue to use the toner for my scars and to help me gauge how clean my face actually is!!! Oh and today I used a new powder. I usually use Mac sheer pressed powder but I just switched to their mineral powder which has jojoba oil in it. It seems to have a pretty decent coverage (for powder, I just hate wearing foundation, to heavy, to messy) and it actually made my face look a little smoother. Also switched my moisturizer from clean and clear to oil of olay for combination oily skin. Didn't like it at first because about 1-2 hours after putting it on I was super oily but today with the new toner and the retin-a I seem to be a little dryer so I don't seem as oily today...but we shall see. I actually hate having combination skin. It seems one part is always oily while the other is always dry! Hate it. One more week till my appt! Please please please....I need this week to hurry up so I can begin my path to clear skin!!!! I am so ready!
So another person asked me at work today about my skin! It's so fuckin embarrasing, and also very rude! She said..do you have acne? You should try proactive...I'm so glad I don't have that problem. What a bitch! My appt is the 8th and I cannot wait to start accutane...I'm anxious and also a little scared! I just need it to work for me because I'm tired of acne...I'm tired of people asking about it, I'm tired of people looking at it, I'm tired of makeup which in my opinion doesn't even hide it that well, but I just can't bear to go without it, and I'm tired of dealing with it. Last night I didn't even wash my face or put on my Retin-A, which is something I would usually never do, but I'm just fed up! Doesn't even seem like it's even working! I wake up and my forehead and nose are so oily and I am still breaking out. Don't know if the Reclipsen is working yet, it's only been a few weeks. I've been picking like crazy! It's so hard to stop. I hate having acne, but It's actually feels really good to pop a pimple just for that second when you're squeezing it. Oh I just can't seem to not do it. I tried to start this week because I don't want to contine doing that once I start the accutane. I know it's going to be a really hard habit to break, sometimes I even do it in my sleep, which is kinda weird...but I'm going to really try! Starting now! 11 days to go! I'm sure my preg test will be negative...I just hope my bloodwork is fine. Waiting this long was hard enough. Not being able to get it for another reason would just crush me. Hopefully there will be no holdups with my derm or Ipledge either. I really hope this works for me...nothing else ever really has. Oh if I could just go back to the good old days, when my skin was perfect, I had no acne, no keloids and life was good! Accutane please take me back to the good ole days!
So I am a 30 year old Black female who used to have PERFECT (really I was complimented all the time and asked what products I used) skin up until my 20's. For the past 10 years I have tried EVERYTHING. Differen, Retin-A cream, pratically every strength, Retin-A gel (which I'm currently on) BP, Clindamycin, glycolic and lactic peels...EVERYTHING!!! I just recently maybe for the past year have been slightly clear, with the exception of keloids/cysts that I have on both sides of my face which I get injected every 8-10 weeks. I switched birth control pills from Lo-estrin fe to Yasmin because I thought it was making me fat about 3 months ago and boom! Breakout city! Horrible. I'm guessing between the pill and the Retin-A I was staying pretty clear. The last time I went to the Derm he said wow you're not looking as well as I'm wanting you to look I think you should try Accutane. While it might seen simple to just switch back to the Lo-estrin fe I just can't seem to do it. I hated it, I was irritable, moody, fat and mean! My boyfriend said I was always in a bad mood. Even if I just went back on that particular pill I still wasn't as clear as I wanted to be so I said ok let's do it. He gave me the lovely yellow Ipledge book, sent me to the lab for blood and urine preg test,scheduled me an appt for the following week and sent me on my way. He didn't even inject me because he said oh the accutane will do wonders for the keloids. So here I go to my next appointment which they tell me don't wear makeup (what???). I couldn't even go in there without my makeup. I waited until I got into the dr's office and washed my makeup off in the room before she came in. Anywayz I'm waiting and I'm like yes finally I'm gonna get the answer to my prayers....WRONG! I was told I have to wait 30 days to get another preg test and then I can get my magic pills! I wanted to cry in that room! I was so pissed! Why didn't my doctor tell me this my last appt. I was convinced I was going to get a prescription that day! To make matters even worse, the next day at work when I'm already upset about my predicament, a coworker asks me hey what's up with your face, do you have acne? Uh duh u asshole yes I do and I would appreciate if you didn't point it out and talk about it so loudly in front of everyone! So long story short, I have my next appt Nov 8 and after is when I get to start! Hopefully Accutane will be the answer to my prayers. I'm tired of wearing makeup. Tired of trying to hide all these scars and bumps. My boyfriend tells me you're fine itz not that bad, you are so beautiful...easy for you to say your face is clear. I don't think he even uses anything to wash his face but water when he's in the shower, whereas I have millions of washes and scrubs,masks,toners,creams etc. He tells me you use to many things maybe that's the problem...what do you suggest I do? Just wash my face with water like you? He just will never understand. I wear my hair down ALL THE TIME to cover my face. I can't even remember the last time I pulled my hair back or up unless I'm at home. I just want to feel beautiful I want all these scars gone and I want to have a nice canvas for my makeup, not a bumby scarred up one! Counting the days till I finally get my medication. Hopefully the dryness will not be to bad. I'm already pretty dry because of the retin-a gel which seems to be actually working. I broke out really bad when I first started it which kind of surprised me because I was already on retin-a but the cream. Anywayz right now I have about 5 or 6 small pimples on my chin and near my hairline. Not really bad but the scarring is bad still from my last really bad breakout. I have also been using hydroquinone which my dr prescribed me. Right now I am washing with a hydrating bar soap (forgot the name) clydamicin, and putting clean and clear oil free moisuturizer, aveeno sunscreen and the hydroquinone in the day the same soap, retin a and hydraquinone at nite. My skin is so weird it tends to be quite dry yet oily at the same time is some spots. Just ready for the accutane. Anticipating my journey.