i just wanted to do a little storytelling for you guys, because i know how hard it is to get your mind off of your acne. I also want to use this blog to do something other than whine about myself. I feel better when i write, and if i can make someone else feel better, by making them laugh, or just by helping them not focus on whatever is making them sad, that would make me feel really happy.
im just going to start talking about some warm memories of mine. most of them were from my c
i really cant believe this three headed monster cyst is on my forehead.
there is a quarter sized bright red circle on the surrounding skin too.
so i have this big red spot and three painful bumps clustered together.
i have crater wounds on top of each bump too. i would be happy if at least i got to have a nice explosion of puss from one of them, but NOPE. NOTHING.
im really horrible, this morning i woke up from last night's picking episode and you'd think id finally just
leaving this space open for people to comment their go to spot treatments, tips on getting rid of zits (big or small) quick, any overnight fixes, any secrets to getting the soft chubby cheek baby face skin we all had when we were born....
oh, how i miss those wonderful days as an infant. how about you?
i am back and angry
i have the most painful huge zit on my forehead like THE most painful fffffffing thing ever omg
so i've been getting these weird blackhead pimples (a bump with a blackhead in the center but the blackhead DOES NOT come out and theres no puss) that are super weird and literally IMPOSSIBLE to get rid of.
so, i noticed like two of these little blackhead bumps and so i tried to squeeze them because the blackhead looked like it was going to come out but of course
i am in search for a new cleanser, and i need your input, please help me!
im looking for a cleanser that has either 0.5% salicylic acid or less than or equal to 5% benzoyl peroxide.
something without harsh chemicals like sodium laureth sulfate.
no oils (other than tea tree oil).
no dyes or fragrances!
something that is gentle, maybe some botanical things in it like green tea, or chamomile id appreciate.
just anything you guys have used that f
weird things are happening.
god, i have so much to say... but im just so tired of it all
ok so, long story short ive developed geographic tongue over the last few months because i burned my tongue really bad back in january and it just has been crazy ever since. if u dont know what GT is, its a condition where your tongue has these patches on it and for some its not painful, but for me it is. there is no known cure and doctors still dont really know anything about it... which.
Hey people i have to refrain from using words like b*tchez n f*~k because ive already gotten two warnings from the site
ok so, i had a good few months.
started eating everything again. gained 20 pounds. yes. 20 pounds, which i am not the least bit upset about. I wanted to gain weight, and i felt so good these past three-ish months because of that. Ive been genuinely happy, eating whatever the f**k i wanted.
now this week, i guess i over did it... let see, three nights ago i ate.
so since i am super anal about my skin, i've collected a multitude of products over the past year, 99% of which i did not even touch- because im too afraid to use it!
so im going to list the products i have in my bathroom cabinet, and you guys let me know what to give a try, and what to throw out.
aztec healing clay mask
paula's choice BHA 2% liquid (had this for 10 months, the most i did with this was smell it)
clean and clear benzoyl peroxide 10% cleanser (not that
so i was washing my face with benzoyl peroxide 10% for a few months, and noticed in that time that it cleared up my skin in this first month, but after that i began to develop larger cystic acne while i was still using the product..... i dont really know why...
anyways i stopped using it altogether and have just been using witch hazel only on my skin for about a month now.
if u read my past two blog posts, i said that im going through a breakout, and i guess i have to use something t
i am just so tired.
but i dont want to die, i just want to be happy.
but i dont know how much more of this i can take.
how much longer until these tears become faded memories and i would have completely moved on,
if i knew what i should do differently, if i knew why this keeps happening over and over, like a broken record for 10 months straight...
do you know how it feels to have every waking moment, for 10 whole months, be about your acne?
i never thought i'd be feeling this way again.
i really dont know what the [censored] is going on with my body.
i thought it was getting better and then just drops back down to the first flare up i had 10 months ago, which was so bad, and made me feel so [censored] disgusting.
this familiar feeling, this familiar sad, horrible, stone in my throat feeling, i never thought i would have to feel again.
wow, i am so freaking sad.
does anyone know any good products that hel
so its dec 31
its funny, i was fine this morning.
and i had plans with my boyfriend, not actual new years plans, cause i wanted to spend time with my family- he invited me out with his family to this restaurant and yeah, i wanted to go, but id rather stay with my family-- anyway,
we had plans to hangout a little during the afternoon and early evening, but then he just wasnt responding to me and i was just sitting in bed, all dressed up and ready to go, and he was M.I
ive had this scab for four days now, and this morning the very thin scab just cracked open and it started bleeding again. i dont understand.
im so frustrated i started crying, and i havent cried like this and i SAID i wouldnt cry like this, but i am just so frustrated why its not healing.
i have a long school day today, and i wanted to see my boyfriend tonight, but this ugly scab is making me feel so disgusting i just want to stay inside all day.
i dont feel like wearing my bang
the title pretty much explains it. and pls read n answer the question at the end.
i picked at that monster cyst and now i have this huge fleshy wound. i did manage to pop it and pus came out. but the cyst, as i described in the previous entry, was oval shaped which led me to assume it was two zits merged together kind of like siamese twins. it was a siamese zit.
this wound i have now clearly shows where exactly the two zits were, they're like two circles. it scabbed over in this shap
i have a very painful, deep cyst on the side of my forehead.
its very oddly shaped like its not circular, its more oval like and not rounded, it is super weird.
im kinda annoyed. it really fucking hurts and its huuge. im going to refrain from picking it or trying to pop it cause i KNOW that will wreak havoc.
whatever. im over it.
anyway, i spent the entire day working on a research paper for my english class. this professor is so fucking rude when it comes to grades, she
so i returned that eridikate bullshit. it literally did absolutely nothing. i can see it working on reaaaally tiny surfaced whiteheads, even just popped whiteheads, i can see it helping with the inflammation or whatever, but it did nothing for my small cyst or any papules. ~i went to sephora and exchanged it for a black kat von d lipstick (which im wearing in the photo below) and im not sorry about it at all.~ hehe
oh, and by the way, i got bangs.
it was last tuesday, an hour before
i went to sephora yesterday and bought the eradikate spot treatment.
it didn't seem to do shit.
after my monster zit last week, i thought, okay, now its over, i can have a peaceful week this week.
but history repeats itself, doesn't it?
every time i finally get rid of one zit, a new one appears. literally every [freaking] time.
would you look at my last week's entry on where i say i "woke up to a zit"... that was last tuesday and today is tuesday, and i woke up to a
its friday. i really dont want to go to school.
the red circle on my face from the hydrocolloid is still there. sigh. im gonna make a forum now and ask about how to get rid of redness/ marks.
i just covered it with makeup even though it made me cringe. yesterday i wore a beanie to cover my forehead, and to be honest i look so bad in hats. like, i feel so uncomfortable. ~but~ at least in college you could wear a fucking sombrero in class and no one would tell you to take it off. in hi
i've been hungry for 8 months. i wont allow myself to eat anything for my fear of breaking out.
i mean, then again, my breakout has been lasting 8 months....
i should just get bangs and eat a bowl of cheese and melted dark chocolate.
mmmmm and dominos pizza.... papa johns cheese sticks and hot wings with BLUE CHEESE.... MMMMMMMMMMMM
fucking HOT CHEETOS ON A TOASTED BAGEL WITH CREAM CHEESE
FOUR CHEESE MAC AND CHEESE, HOMEMADE LASAGNA, OH MY GOD i miss it so much.
okay one: they don't [freaking] work. and yes i tried it on the "right type of pimple". i used the peach slices brand.
two: they left a red ring around the pimple, which is in the center of my forehead. LOL. not going to lie it is a little bit funny. guess i'm just gonna have to wear a hat today, again.
i tried covering it with makeup but i don't wear foundation all over my face, i only spot apply a little bit of concealer, and this red area is just way too large for me to cover with
so i'm considering getting bangs.
i've been considering bangs for a while because of my acne.
i do have a phobia of things touching my face, even my own hands and hair, so it would be something......new. *mentally screams at the thought of hair grease staying on my forehead 24/7*
but i've been experimenting with it in the mirror, i don't think it looks bad, i just don't look as good as i think i look now, hair wise.
i really do like the way i style my hair now. i think its r
i have one class this morning.
obviously i dont want to go, i am dreading it.
im just going to wear my cap to cover my face.
its not going to make me feel any better though.
i just feel so fucking tired.
last night after i wrote my first three depressing entries, i made myself draw and write in my journal.
i found that it did calm me a little, and made me forget about crying and hating myself.
because the reality is, i dont hate myself. i do love myself, a
ive been crying for 8 months straight.
this is the third entry for tonight, i am just so tired.
i remember a few months ago i was feeling this way and i tried to get in contact with the national suicide hotline. i waited for an hour, never got connected to anyone. i really needed someone then. maybe i need someone now. i just dont even know how i would attempt to describe, to a therapist, the fact that my depression solely exists because of my acne. the fact that i have self harmed a
this experience with acne has exacerbated my ocd.
i have always had obsessive compulsive tendencies, but thats all that they were. tendencies.
im going to be completely honest here, and i hope i dont trigger anyone.
before all of this, i would do this thing where i had to repeat this phrase in my head until it sounded right, whenever i thought about something that i did not want to happen.
i would also knock five times on wood with my right hand (only my index finger knuck
please read my first forum before starting this.
today, i stayed home from school again
woke up to a zit
i cant help it
i try not to let my acne control my life, but it literally will not let me go free
ive noticed lately i do not cry as much about my acne like i used to. when the acne first started creeping up, i would cry over small teeny pimples.
now that i am getting regular painful cysts i have become desensitized, yet still so sensitive when it comes to my ski