Kairasa

I've been to: Australia (all around the East coast from Cairnes down to Sydney), Rome, Paris, London, Holyhead (Wales), all around Ireland, and Zurich (Switzerland...but only the airport haha).

 

I plan to visit: Every single country I can experience in my lifetime.

 

I haven't really eaten many exotic foods. I did have escargot in Paris and blood pudding in Ireland.

 

I've held a koala in Australia and been up close and personal with kangaroos!

 

I could not pick a place to be the most interesting because all of them left a strong impression on me. I flew to Ireland at the end of May last year and it was a pretty spectacular month spent there. I got to see my now fiance after 5 months of being apart upon arrival, he proposed on the second day in a CASTLE, I got to meet a lot of important people in his life, drive around the country for 3 weeks, and spend a few days in Dublin at a Catholic conference. It was a beautiful experience.

 

Rome was also wonderful because it was at Christmastime, I hadn't seen aforementioned person in 4 months, I got to attend mass in St Peter's on Christmas Eve with the Pope....got to explore the city....

 

My life is just full of blessings and traveling is definitely way up there on my list for things to share with my soon to be husband and our future children. Whether it's on a roadtrip through America (we did that for a month a few summers ago!), or a foreign country. The world is endlessly fascinating to me.

I know it's difficult, and as a teen I used to be INCREDIBLY frustrated when my mom would say "oh you'll grow out of it!" and...I never did. Even now I have to 'maintain' my acne, meaning I use Dan's Regimen and it keeps it under control, but I cannot just use nothing, or the acne will persist.

Instead of throwing a pillow across the room and stomping my foot, I learned to accept it as a part of me. Not a good or a bad part, but just one element. Just like my straight hair, my eye color, my body shape...it's one part of me. But what it brought me, or forced me to learn, was so much more important. And that's what acne reminds me of now, personal growth. Try to work towards that...because you'll be a much happier and satisifed person, trust me. It's difficult and yet so worth it!

I agree with the above poster. Don't let your insecurities or perceptions ruin an otherwise fun time! I guarantee you won't remember how you felt that day about your skin if you just embrace yourself, flaws and all, and enjoy the holidays!

My fiancé has scars on his face and they are part of the reason he is unique and the man I love. He actually had the most severe acne I've ever seen around here (yes we met here oh...over 5 years ago now), and I swear I never notice them except in a "that is one of the many little items that make him Matt."

So don't worry so much, your imperfections are really assets to the right person. =)

Your concerns are normal but they are unfounded, and lemme tell you why! =)

I am a woman, 23, and I choose to remain a virgin until married. I made the decision a few years ago, when I was single, and yes, i was completely honest with guys in not only have I not had sex, but I am not going to with you at this moment. Let's just say that made for some interesting/amusing reactions over the years. Even before I had made that decision, I was never okay personally with casual sex.

A bit of a background about me...as I said I'm 23, I'm engaged, and I've been in a relationship with a guy who is a virgin at almost age 24, for over 2 years...and we aren't getting married for another year and a half. Now, to some people that could be crazy and I'm not pushing my beliefs on you or anyone, the choice about who to share your sexuality with is your choice, not anyone elses. It's not a race or a competition, even though I think boys (and some men) see it as one. I refused to play that game, and to counter what you say about being undesirable, I think I became very desirable at times because I was a challenge. Which isn't a good thing, but you know how men are, since you are one. =P Kidding aside, making a choice about yourself on this level and sticking to it really shows a positive portion of your character, and THAT is very desirable and beautiful.

I know very few people who are still virgins, and even less who are as strict about boundaries as my fiancé and I. Those boundaries are determined by you, the other person in the relationship, and what your moral beliefs dictate. It makes no sense to compare yourself to other people or to feel like you are less of a man because of it. And it surely makes no sense to worry about a potential girl coming into your life and abruptly leaving because you aren't experienced enough for her. If that happens, there clearly isn't a deep enough connection (in my opinion) to even contemplate having sex with her.

Bottom line: Your virignity is solely your own, and you can choose who to give it to. That choice shouldn't be influenced by other people outside of your relationship.

PS: I don't find my virgin fiancé lame at all...in fact he's pretty much the coolest guy out there!

To the people who say this post is just to make you feel better, I challenge you to REALLY observe those around you. If you are a high school student, take a moment to look past that little bubble. To see the rest of the world, to see couples, in their 20s, 30s, 40s...80s. Is there a definite pattern? Sure, people who are fit can be paired with someone equally in-shape, but is that because they decided to start a relationship based on outward appearances or something more? Perhaps their love of working out together, of their lifestyles, perhaps their personalities, their faith, who knows?

My point being that you cannot assume that appearances make or break your first chance with someone, their first impression of you even. The world does not work that way. Are there shallow people in the world? Absolutely! Do they make up a large percentage of the population? No. Do people date/marry for shallow reasons, whether that be appearances, wealth, or power? Of course. But that isn't the majority of people.

I might only be 23 but I have enough life experience to say that REAL, worthwhile relationships are built on more than just outward appearances or what a person can "give" you. You must be attracted to a person but just 10 minutes in psychological studies on what "attracts" people yields so many varied results, there clearly isn't one answer for everyone. So try not to be so hard on yourself, understand that you don't need a person to complete you, and when real love comes along, you'll know it. Because it's centered on selflessness, and of wanting the person you are with to be happy and better above yourself.

Are you in high school? Because let me tell you, most people are shallow and immature. Part of it they cannot help but the other part is just pettiness and a need for approval. After high school it is very true that the world is a different place. I'm 23, so I've recently been through high school and now college. I didn't date very much in high school, sometimes I wished I had a boyfriend, other times I did not. Life is a LOT more than boys, whether you have one or not. It's not healthy to put all your emotional wellbeing in having a man. I know girls who still do this at my age and I feel for them. Living like that must be terrible. It's important to find your inner happiness and joy, apart from other people.

Credit to you for facing your fears.  My entire dating history, if I can even call it that, consists of a date I wish hadn't happened and an instance where I was stood up.  That's it.  Those two instances have basically held me back for years and I always let those fears win, to the point where I don't even try.  It's not even about acne for me anymore.  It's all about those insecurities and a total lack of confidence in myself and my appearance.  Facing those fears would be a major thing, so I admire the fact you're putting yourself out there.  Also admire the fact you seem to have set up at least a couple of dates in as many months because I wouldn't have a clue how to do that.  I suppose there's always a chance of rejection, but it doesn't automatically have to be about your skin.  In fact, doesn't even have to be about you at all. Better that you try and see how it turns out, than hide away and wonder what you may be missing.  Good luck!  

Well, for what it's worth, you met up with me and while it wasn't a date, it was a fun platonic hang out! You even braved a monsoon to spend the day in London with lil ole me! And you were a marvelous tour guide and companion for the day! Great company, super nice, and you didn't even mind walking all over the city, as I tend to wander a lot. =P

To the Original Poster, I wish you luck with your date! I met my fiancé on this website, and we first met in the middle of the day in airport lighting. We both don't really have skin qualms anymore, but everyone struggles with something in life. And he has scars, for what it's worth, and he is the handsomest man on the planet to me, scars and all. The fact that he is comfortable in himself is what really matters. Work towards that and the rest follows. =)

Not to get too off-topic, but that is a great story! Best of luck with your upcoming nuptials. Very sweet.

Aw thank you! The whole story is pretty crazy actually. If you are interested I don't mind telling it via PM, but I do not wish to hijack this thread. haha.

Credit to you for facing your fears.  My entire dating history, if I can even call it that, consists of a date I wish hadn't happened and an instance where I was stood up.  That's it.  Those two instances have basically held me back for years and I always let those fears win, to the point where I don't even try.  It's not even about acne for me anymore.  It's all about those insecurities and a total lack of confidence in myself and my appearance.  Facing those fears would be a major thing, so I admire the fact you're putting yourself out there.  Also admire the fact you seem to have set up at least a couple of dates in as many months because I wouldn't have a clue how to do that.  I suppose there's always a chance of rejection, but it doesn't automatically have to be about your skin.  In fact, doesn't even have to be about you at all. Better that you try and see how it turns out, than hide away and wonder what you may be missing.  Good luck!  

Well, for what it's worth, you met up with me and while it wasn't a date, it was a fun platonic hang out! You even braved a monsoon to spend the day in London with lil ole me! And you were a marvelous tour guide and companion for the day! Great company, super nice, and you didn't even mind walking all over the city, as I tend to wander a lot. =P

To the Original Poster, I wish you luck with your date! I met my fiancé on this website, and we first met in the middle of the day in airport lighting. We both don't really have skin qualms anymore, but everyone struggles with something in life. And he has scars, for what it's worth, and he is the handsomest man on the planet to me, scars and all. The fact that he is comfortable in himself is what really matters. Work towards that and the rest follows. =)

I sometimes feel that way, but I am a recent college postgrad trying to find a job/moving really far away/recently engaged, all at the same time. So there is a lot of change and stress coming my way. Honestly, I pray a lot. My faith is instrumental to my life, and by praying, I pray for God to strengthen me, to work through me, to help me trusting myself...not just for a magical band-aid to make life easy. I feel it's important to explain that and if I've become a bit wordy, I apologize. I have always been one to excessively talk. =P

Other than that, I do something very cheesy, and that is count my blessings. I start with whatever I can...I can walk, talk, see, read, and move on to things like I have a comfy bed, breakfast (or lunch) to look forward to, ect. Beauty and joy can really be found in little things. I encourage you to try. =)

I couldn't pass this thread up to post in. And thanks for sharing your personal stories you all, they make me smile!

I met my boyfriend on this site a few years ago. We went on a month long roadtrip together last summer, and due to wonderful life working out, we spent the last year within a short distance of each other.

Acne was a given with us. haha. He had quite severe acne for a time, but now has scars. His face is absolutely beautiful to me, not in spite of them, but WITH them. Acne brought us together, brought us friendships, ultimately brought us love...I don't think there is anything negative we could say about it.

For what it's worth, I never worried about him seeing me without makeup on. In fact, we officially started dating in the midst of backpacking...so not only was my face not nice and made up, but I was sweaty and probably needed a shower. I think our circumstances made talking about skin easier in a way, but regardless I never had a problem to begin with. He kisses my face, touches my face, and I his. I cannot imagine it being otherwise.

Lets all be thankful for love! And for those of you who haven't found it, be patient, it'll happen.

So update.... I am not engaged to the same man I spoke about above.

Just want to reinforce that even though my skin breaks out on occasion, it in no way affects the quality of our relationship because that is something YOU choose to happen. Unless you date someone extremely shallow, and in that case, I think it's best to reevaluate your relationship.

It might be hard to realize at times, but you are beautiful, because your beauty has absolutely nothing to do with your outward appearance. And even if it did, I would wager you are more attractive than you give yourself credit for. Just a bit of wisdom for free. =P

Hello there! I know it's easy to freak out and believe it is not working at all, but please remember that it takes at least a month to begin to see real results! Keep with it, we'll be here for you. =)

I know it can be difficult, but it's emotionally freeing and good for the relationship in the long run to bring up issues such as these. Not only are they personal, but perhaps the person will end up supporting you and ultimately building you up, as you do the same for them.

My situation is a little difference because my boyfriend of almost two years is from this website and he had some of the worst acne I've ever seen in pictures. He used Accutane and it cleared him up but he has scars, and he isn't ashamed of them. And neither am I! They are part of what makes him...him. They are beautiful in that respect.

I guarantee she'll be supportive of you if she cares about you. =)

Hey there, I know it can be frustrating to see your acne become worse at first, but remember that your skin is an organ, and your cellular cycles about 30 days to fully complete. Try to give yourself at least a month to begin to see improvement. I know it can seem impossible some days, but I struggled with this as well at one point, and patience was the only answer. Either patience or give up.

In the meantime, you are fortunate to have access to a wonderful site full of people who will support you through the tough times. And yes, the occasional troll, but those exist outside the internet as well. Don't ever feel bad for venting, but also realize that acne doesn't change you or make you lose or gain anything...you choose that yourself.

After a year and a half almost on the regimen, my skin is better than ever. =) Don't give up on having patience, it pays off.



And because I look royally annoyed in the first pic...I swear I smile! haha