ahh i can totally relate and the best advice i can give to you is to have a good skincare regimen that includes a great topical. that will make all the difference i can promise you that. also if you have to go on accutane then just do it and get it over with because you dont want to be 35 like me and have scarring because you were too scared to do the accutane when you were younger. either way you are going to be ok and there are options out there for you. if your acne comes back you could try spiro though first before the accutane if you wanted as well just be sure to talk about everything with your derm.