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AlexanderJ86

Member Since 21 Feb 2013
Offline Last Active May 31 2015 04:05 PM

#3481362 If You're Reading This...you Are An Amazing Person

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 17 May 2015 - 04:40 PM

I want to say, especially to the girls, that I, as a heterosexual guy, don't mind acne (scars) on a girls skin. The problem might be bigger in your head than in reality.


#3474826 Embarassing Acne Moments

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 16 March 2015 - 02:39 PM

I was reading some of your guys' other posts about this topic and I wanted to talk about my own embarassing moments because I've had plenty. And id like to share them with people who can understand and relate. I remember I used to go to church when I was 15. My church had about 120 members we congregated twice a week. I promise you more than half of my church told me something about my acne. The usual dumb questions. Do you wash your face? What do you wash your face with? Little kids asking me why I had spots. Others blaming my parents for not buying me the right products. Others trying to sell me mary Kay products they swore would fix my face. I hated going. I would cry as I got ready for church. I would look in the mirror before I left my house and just cry. My dad telling me I was still the most beautiful girl. I don't go to church anymore. I also remember working as a cashier and customers asking me why my face was so red. Feeling everyone's eyes on me I just wanted to disappear. I quit. And going to school knowing huge spots on my face were just staring at everyone. Id just look down and try not to make eye contact. Canceling dates because I was too self conscious. Not going out with my friends cus I just felt so ugly. Taking pictures with my friends or family and looking at the pictures and just wanting to crawl in a hole and die. Yeah acne can really ruin a person

That people have faith doesn't mean they are social. The psychopaths are everywhere. We have all met them. I am not one of them though. They clearly got to you, but you should not give up. You should find people who are nice to you regardless of the state of your skin.




#3471186 Women With Scars: Do You Get Approached?

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 10 February 2015 - 06:07 PM

Not so many simply come forward to have a chat or flirt, unless their drunk looking for a one night stand in a club

That's because that generally doesn't work for men. Definitely not for men with acne. For me, a man with acne, it is seemingly impossible to get people (and girls) to even like me the normal way, independent from the setting.




#3470640 How To Get Over Acne Depression? Please Help I'm Desperate

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 06 February 2015 - 04:18 AM

Hi everyone,

 

I've never posted on a forum before let alone one which deals with something very personal to me, but I think it's time to share my story and to ask for insight from this community. I've been dealing with this by myself for some time now and I think it's been very detrimental to my recovery by keeping it a secret.

 

I'm 23 years old living in new york city. I've had chronic acne all my life but nothing ever terribly severe. I've done everything under the sun. It's been really clear for the past year before 7 months ago when I changed my diet to a high carb low fat vegan diet (in attempts to erratic the acne 100%). I listened to some bad advice and followed the diet incorrectly and my skin has plummeted to its all time low.

 

So severe that when I googled "severe acne," a search engine phrase that shows the most horrific types of acne.. I had worse. That was my all time low.. when my acne was worse than the severe acne found on the internet. 

 

Through modifying my high carb low fat vegan diet and seeing an MD certified holistic doctor.. I have clear skin now. I still have breakouts but they are very small. What pains me are the acne scars that I've sustained from the severe acne that tortured my whole entire face (all over face, even under eyebrows, near my eyes, under my jaw, down my neck). My acne was so bad there was not one inch of skin that you can see. You can only imagine what my skin texture looks like now. 

 

I haven't worked for 7 months, I live off money my parents give me, I have no money, I spent well over $10,000 trying to cure this, I haven't gone out at all, I stay home all day, I used to be a fitness fanatic but I haven't gone for months, I sit all day, some days I go 3 days without even once going out, I dress like a bum, I'm always in my pajamas, I'm depressed, I'm easily agitated, I have social anxiety, I haven't seen my friends in months, I talk to no one. It's been very hard. This has been the hardest experience that I've ever gone through. I cry almost every day.

 

Yes, I'm post-acne despite still dealing with scars but my severe acne has been going on for so many months that I have PTSD. 
Similar to girls who are anorexic and who see a different girl in the mirror, I have the same thing with my face. I can't look people in the eye. I can't hold a conversation. People see me as extrovert but I have very intense introvert tendencies and I'm too in my head now. I'm too far deep. 

 

I'm writing this is because recently when I tried to rekindle my social skills (trying to be proactive)... I've tried hanging out with a few "good friends" of mine and... things change if you haven't seen them for half a year. I felt like they didn't like me, they thought I was weird, I felt self-conscious. I just felt so alone. Dealing with acne is so personal and so shameful, how could I talk about it? They wouldn't understand. It's been really damaging to my self-confidence and ego. I'm someone who is considered good looking, positive, happy, flirty, charming.. I worked so hard to build up these qualities after having such a tramautizing childhood and growing up with low self-confidence. And now I feel like I'm back to square one. I don't know what to do. I'm crying right now as I type this. 

 

Can you guys give me some advice? Or at least words of encouragement? How have you guys dealt with lingering depression? How do you get out of your head and into proactive behaviors?

 

I need this more than anything because my money is dried up.. I need confidence to go back to work, to get my life back. I'm only 23 and I feel like I've wasted my best years. 

 

Peace and love,

Peaches

Did people become hostile to you because of your skin?




#3466544 Moderate Acne But It's Killing Me

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 04 January 2015 - 07:33 AM

You are not your skin. The beauty industry may have convinced you of that, but it is not true.




#3466543 Has Acne Prevent You From Starting A Life Of Your Own?

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 04 January 2015 - 07:30 AM

Due to the nightmare that was high school, I never mustered up the courage to go to college. I'm now 21 1/2 & feel like I might be ok with it now but at my age do you think it's too late to start school again? Did anyone else not go because of acne?

Tbh I kind of feel like i want to join one of the military branches but again my physiological trauma prevents me from taking any affirmative action in my life, not to mention how embarrassing it would be if everyone would get to see my back acne.... sigh i just feel to ugly for society. After being told that for years by strangers I believe them. Someone give me advice please, how have you delt with incorporating yourself with society was it hard? Life of an ugly man is so hard dude, the worst of it is I did nothing to deserve this kind of treatment from humanity.

I consider myself a good person but, all the mental abuse over the years has absolutely changed something about me... I have a confession actually. I noticed that while I try to stay away from people in general. I'm ashamed to admit that i have abused animals in the past =(. That's something I feel I would have never done had it not been for all the hatred people have put in me. Again I apologize to any pet owners, that's something i feel very guilty about. I guess I felt that I had to take my anger out on anything I could, even my old pet dog. but don't worry I haven't seen him since i moved & no I currently have no pets.

I read somewere that animal abuse is a common stepping stone to becoming a full blown serial killer, which kind of scares me... sigh I'm just a big mess really. Perhaps I should visit a shrink, I never have & never felt the need to but I may have been wrong. I just want what everyone else does... a happy healthy life, I don't even want to be ritch.

I'll be moving back with my mom soon & I hope I can get my life together this time, I spent the whole summer and winter just waiting on my acne to clear up on its own. I believe it's now at a good enough level to were i might actually be able to function as a regular member of society. By no means is it anywere near flawless skin though, I still have many large open pores & few discoloration. At least I know it'll never be as bad as in my teens, that's only a small comfort though..

Society does not exist. It is an illusion. It's fake. You cannot be a member of something that does not exist. In a society you would not encounter the people you (and me) have encountered. You would have no reason to stay away from people.

I have been treated the same way by other people with no fault of my own. I have never punched people into a hospital or something. The discrimination is real. It always has been. I have been put in a mental hospital.




#3457381 Advice For Guys

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 24 October 2014 - 06:02 PM

It's all a bunch of bullshit. The who gives a fuck attitude had zero influence for me.




#3455725 Elliott Hulse Saved My Life

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 13 October 2014 - 03:31 AM

Ultimately, you decide how you feel. The environment can greatly influence your decision, but in the end, you are the commander. Mental disorders can be fixed. Isn't evolution sufficient evidence to prove that things change over time? Adaptation is the key element. We've learned in our past through our own ideas to let ourselves be capsized because it's our safezone. He is not the only one with this theory. There are many others, including Miguel Ruiz with "The Four Agreements" just as one example, along with Robert Greene's "Mastery." Do not let yourself dissolve in a perpetual hell. There is a brilliance in all of us!

Free will does not exist. Some mental disorders cannot be fixed. Also, they may worsen over time. There are disorders that fit in the category of "learning to live with it". Evolution has nothing to do with it. You are just as a stranger in your own world as he is. My advice is to learn about the nature of mental disorders.




#3451996 People Point Out My Makeup

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 14 September 2014 - 08:16 AM

Get over it and stop whining about what other people say about you.

How the fuck is that going to solve her social problems?




#3451268 People Point Out My Makeup

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 09 September 2014 - 09:48 AM

Hi guys,
I recently joined acne.org because of the struggle that acne has put me through. I've had mild acne for 3 years but this year it became worse. It was specifically located on my forehead but now that has cleared. Sadly my cheeks, chin and temples have broken out. I started to wear makeup to help my self- confidence, but since I go to high school, all the girls (including my friends) have been pointing out my makeup like its a disease. Some say, " you need to blend your foundation better" or "I can tell your wearing makeup". One instance a friend sitting beside me said, " you cake on your foundation, make it look more natural or don't wear it at all". She yelled it all my class, everyone could hear. I felt so embarrassed. If only they saw the true condition of my face. They would make worse comments. I feel so depressed.

I understand. The need to control others and other aggressive behaviour is ingrained in our malfunctioning culture. They can't help it they are doing that.




#3451237 "acne Is The Mark Of The Devil"?!

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 09 September 2014 - 04:50 AM

That is the bullying nature of religion. Religious people are full with meaningless and damaging hate. They don't see people as human anymore when those people have something that conflicts with their ideas, like gay people and, as it seems, also people with acne.




#3437275 How Have You Given Your Acne Your Derierre

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 22 June 2014 - 06:05 AM

I stopped caring. I have to, otherwise the loneliness destroys me.




#3434598 Dating With This Face (Pics)

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 03 June 2014 - 03:13 AM

Cheer up, there's guys out there who who would love to be with you. 

thanks..that's what everyone says, but in reality, noone really. Maybe I'm in the wrong place at the wrong time.

You may be right, but I may also be right.




#3434099 Blunt Dating Advice For People With Acne

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 31 May 2014 - 12:39 AM

I don't care much about looks. At least not the way other people do. You have misread the bit about being a nice guy. My social skills have actually been tested by psychiatry. They are fine. The group of civilized people is so small that I have developed untreatable disorders. Now that people allow me to become like that is really offensive! What I say is nothing compared to what I have been through.

.

 The only one completely in charge of what you become is yourself. It's up to you -not others- whether to use that experience to help yourself, or to hurt yourself.                

You often don't get to chose what bad things happen to you in life; however, you can chose the effect it has on you.

 And yes, I know I'm being harsh, but I believe that we should be able to rise above the bad experiences in life and make something good out of it.

 I doubt you're a bad person, but I advise you to try to think more positively about other people and to not victimize yourself according to your past experiences.

 And it's great that your "social skills have been tested by psychiatry", but that's not a measure of character. Character is what you do when nobody is watching.

But I digress; that's an entirely different discussion. 

 In short, you have the power to chose who you become- take all those negative experiences and use them to build yourself up, not knock yourself down. 

"you can chose the effect it has on you."

Can you prove that statement? Psychiatry says you can't. The existence of the DSM is proof for their position. The reality is is that  we are all products of our environment.




#3433501 Being A Virgin...

Posted by AlexanderJ86 on 27 May 2014 - 03:22 PM

There are far more male virgins than female virgins. Women are naturally attracted to symettry, compact midfaces, flawless olive skin, dark hair, low hairlines, and height.

 

Male beauty is NOT subjective. Dont let anyone tell you otherwise. Being born male an "average looking" or ugly male is a SCAM. 

I don't know about the subjectivity, but it is obvious to me that women are completely brainwashed by the media, Hollywood, the beauty industry, the porn industry, etc. You know what I mean. People say that men only care about looks. That's a lie. Research indicates that it is exactly the other way around. Men care less about looks as they have more sex drive fueled by testosterone. You wonder why women wear so much make up in the first place and the way they dress. It is about the competition between women, not about attracting men.