I just wanted to give you some encouragement. I have similar skin problems (blackheads, hyperpigmentation, noninflammed bumps) and I've been using tretinoin 0.01% cream for 10 weeks now. I've seen some progress overall in that my face feels smoother and less congested, but I started breaking out pretty badly around week 8. I think this is partially because I delayed the initial breakout by starting out slowly and because I've been picking.
For moisturizers, I use Cetaphil DailyAdvance Ultra Hydrating Lotion. I find it's pretty light and doesn't make me break out at all. Also - the instructions that came with my tretinoin actually recommended that you don't start out applying it every night. You're starting with a pretty high strength (at least, compared to me!) so I think it would be okay to skip a night every couple of days if your face is really irritated. Just my two cents.
Good luck with everything and don't give up!