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Member Since 12 Dec 2012
Offline Last Active Jul 31 2014 08:37 PM

#3314514 Do Girls Care About Acne? Tips For Guys With Acne

Posted by songbirdsing on 30 December 2012 - 07:34 PM

I have dated guys with acne and never thought twice about it. Though, I do agree with nakedsmurf that girls who have skin problems are probably more accepting of guys with skin problems, so I can't speak from a been-perflectly-clear-my-whole-life point of view. However, my younger sister who was blessed with beautiful skin (I got the shitty genes, of course) dated a guy with pretty bad acne and that did not stop her from eventually marrying him. I know that for us, a guy's confidence, personality, chivalry, humor and thoughtfulness far outweigh any concern of skin issues. I can't stress enough how far confidence can take you! The quickest way to turn a girl off would be crippling insecurity, but there is nothing wrong with having some transparency with the issue if you reach a point in your relationship where you can speak honestly about such concerns. I think most significant others would be surprised by the insecurities and not see the issue as magnified as we often view things about ourselves. And of course, if they're worth your time, they will be loving and supportive about it all. Anyhoo, my two cents!

So when a girl meets a guy who's insecure she goes "Next!" but when she meets a guy who is "confident" she stays interested. And then when later the guy says "You know, I act confident and all but a lot of the time I'm actually quite insecure" she goes "That's ok!". It just seems like a contradiction?

I think everyone is insecure in some respect...but the fact that you overcome your insecurity to behave as confident is much like overcoming fear.  Most times when we overcome a fear, it's not because a fear has suddenly gone away....it is living with the emotions of fear to come out on the other side of it.  I don't see it as a contradiction, but building strength.  Insecurities usually just don't go away even if the "problem" does.  For example, I used to weigh about 40 lbs more (at my very short height that is significant)....I've been thin for almost 3 years now and struggled for a long time with the mentality of being overweight.  The insecurity remained despite my weight being gone.  The act of me behaving confident in my body is what is helping to change my perspective.  

And as for OP's question of what is confidence....i think it's being who you are and not acting ashamed of that.  It's presenting yourself to the world and not apologizing for your imperfections.  It's not looking to the ground all the time or putting yourself down.  I think being confident is being aware of your weaknesses, but concentrating on your strengths.  If you're the funny guy, or a good listener, or good at sports, or an expert on a particular subject....you let those things shine while not being full of yourself....

#3314233 Do Girls Care About Acne? Tips For Guys With Acne

Posted by songbirdsing on 29 December 2012 - 01:33 PM

Some girls AND some guys will definitely be very cruel when it comes to acne depending on the serverity of it. back when I still had substantial scarring from a bout of acne brought on from protein shakes I overheard a conversation between a girl I was close friends with and her friend. She basically asked her friend if she was interetested in dating me and her friend replied, no his face has too many scars. When I heard this I was pissed off and hurt at first but i got over it. So basically... if the person you are interested in make the fact you have acne or scars from it a deal breaker when it comes to being dating material then just steer clear of them, and try not to get hurt and take it personal which IMO is the hardest part. If a person is that shallow to make something like that so important in their considerations before even giving you a chance then I personally would not want to date them in the first place no matter how perfect they may think they are.

That's awful!  I have found many girls to be shallow about stupider things though....When I was in high school my friend didn't want to date a guy because "he talked with too much saliva in his mouth"...um..ok.  I don't really believe in karma, but I have noticed many of the girls that think they are too good end up getting fat or looking a hot mess later in life anyway.

#3314134 Do Girls Care About Acne? Tips For Guys With Acne

Posted by songbirdsing on 28 December 2012 - 11:30 PM

When I was (much) younger with much less acne.....acne on guys was never an issue. I mean I noticed it on them but if he was attractive it didn't matter. I liked a few guys with moderate/severe acne and to me it wasn't an issue. My advice is to be confident in who you are and girls will be drawn to you. The guys who are insecure and quiet tend not to draw girls to them.  Even if you feel insecure, ACTING insecure is a turn off.  Plus even girls with flawless skin have things they are insecure about so I don't think we are much different and our opinions are still valid in this.