Jump to content

UnacceptedRealist

Member Since 18 Jul 2012
Offline Last Active Yesterday, 05:47 PM

Posts I've Made

In Topic: Acne Is Ugly

Yesterday, 12:42 PM

I'm a little thrown off by your statement... where did I say that somebody's self-worth was determined by their physical appearance? I made it clear in my post that I find that superficial.

Well, It's probably an interpretation error on my part, but you did say:

To undermine somebody's self-worth based on a skin condition is purely a superficial thing to do.

And I assumed that you were accusing the OP of doing the above, which meant, to me, that you were linking self-worth to one's physical appearance.

I'm perfectly content with acknowledging that acne is not flattering. However, isn't a tad unfair to deem a person unattractive because of one unpleasant feature?

As far as I'm concerned, there is a fairly direct connection to be made here: If an individual has an "unpleasant feature," their overall appearance is likely to be negatively impacted to some extent.  However, in my opinion, this does not mean they are "ugly" or unattractive as a whole, and it's certainly not an indication of lesser intrinsic value as a person. 

OP's method of "introspection" was harsh in a sense that some acne sufferers here are already vulnerable and being called ugly, indirectly or not, isn't the type of support they were looking for.
And I can't help but yearn for those who strive to meet "society's" definition of beautiful. Acne eats away at you slowly, so feeling even the smallest hint of confidence can help us cope. And that's hard to achieve when even your fellow acne-suffering brethren is reminding you that you are the definition of ugly in the eyes of many.
ciao

Honestly, I don't have much sympathy in this regard.  In my opinion, if anyone is this "vulnerable" they should avoid community forums (especially those titled "Emotional and psychological effects of acne").  This, among other reasons, is because they're likely to present very diverse feelings and opinions, and no-one is obligated to make sure their thoughts align with anyone else's.  In other words, I don't think it's reasonable to expect everyone to provide that exact kind of support you need.


In Topic: Acne Is Ugly

30 August 2014 - 02:00 PM

I am shocked to read some of these comments here. How disgraceful, honestly. To undermine somebody's self-worth based on a skin condition is purely a superficial thing to do. I see what you're getting at. I don't like false flattery. But I draw the line here.

I think there's a significant difference between "undermining somebody's self-worth" and being willing to acknowledge that acne is fundamentally unattractive.  Do you really determine someone's self-worth based how physically attractive you deem them to be? If you do, is that not the epitome of superficiality?

To call somebody ugly because of a condition... I'm astonished at how shallow some people can get. You may think acne is ugly, fine. That's your opinion. But I would rather have a face full of cysts and nodules than have an ugly heart like yours, OP.

Although I can't vouch for the aesthetic appeal of the OP's heart, I am inclined to think that he doesn't go out of his way to alert people of his feelings about their appearance.  Rather, I took the OP's post to be more of an exercise in introspection; that is, I think he was looking for people to reflect on why they feel a need to alter the generally accepted standards of attractiveness just to include themselves. I mean, in essence, is that not an indirect way of demonstrating that they adhere to the ideals of the very "society" that so many of them condemn? 

With all that said, I'd also like to clarify my original post (although I'm not sure if I made the "disgraceful" category):

I think acne, in and of itself, is unattractive; however, I do not think having acne invariably makes someone unattractive. For most people acne is a fairly minor cosmetic nuisance, which has a negligible impact on their overall appearance.


In Topic: Some Positivity Is Needed Around Here

26 August 2014 - 04:14 PM

Well, although I have nothing against positivity, I think it's important not to generalize the effects of acne.  For many, there's no hope for a day when they're "finally clear," as they've already been left with scarring (which can be quite severe).

So, while I agree that most people will be different post-acne, I don't think the positive-to-negative change ratio is always in their favor.


In Topic: Acne Is Ugly

24 August 2014 - 03:17 PM

In general, I agree -- I think it's safe to say that acne and its related issues are unattractive, and therefore those afflicted are, at least, less attractive than they'd be otherwise.  Moreover, I believe many people are too quick to label others as "shallow" for simply acknowledging (in one way or another) the fact that acne is unappealing.  It's both, in my opinion, unrealistic and unreasonable to expect people to look past obvious flaws, no matter how superficial you deem them to be.

 

 


In Topic: Lol @ People Who Think "confidence" Gets You A Girlfriend

03 May 2014 - 11:47 AM

Complaining and blaming doesn't get you a girlfriend either. I am also sick of it. That's why I am building a new civilization. In the new civilization people will learn that acne is a skin issue, not contagious cancer.

 

I doubt your new civilization would be any different.  The issue isn't that people think acne is a "contagious cancer"; it's that acne is a skin issue -- in other words, it's an objectively unappealing trait.  For this reason, I don't think most people need to "learn" anything; they're already correct: people with acne are, to some extent, aesthetically unappealing.