I think confidence is a misused, perhaps overused, word. I agree with the sentiment that confidence is key, but, despite people constantly repeating the mantra that 'confidence is not the same as arrogance/cockiness', in reality few can actually tell the difference - especially when it comes to dating. Arrogant men (and to a lesser extent women) do very well indeed when it comes to attracting the opposite sex.
In my view, it is better to aim for inner peace. I haven't found 'inner peace' as such but in those fleeting moments when I feel peaceful and content with myself and the world it is far easier to feel positivity, creativity, warmth and kindness. When I strive for 'confidence' it too often feels like an act, an act that conforms to society's ideal of an 'alpha' male: selfishness, dominance, control, promiscuity, etc. are not qualities I admire and wish to ape.
I agree 100% with Jamie's post here. Based purely on life experience (my own personal life experience) this rings especially true. It's so easy to tell someone "be confident" like it's a switch you're capable of toggling in your head whenever you desire. It's not. You'll notice in this modern day society that an arrogant male who is rude as hell has no problem at all getting a girlfriend. I will never be that person. I don't WANT to be that person. I'm not willing to change myself and betray my personality just because that's what some girls find attractive. Do I want a relationship? Absolutely. Am I going to put on an act and be an asshole to obtain that relationship? Nah. I'll pass.
I'll be honest when I say that I hate modern dating. Everything about it seems flawed to me. We live in an image obsessed world where some of the most negative personality traits are considered "hot" or "sexy."
I have no desire to be a douche bag "alpha male" no matter how sexy or attractive that persona is. It's not me...and even if it means I'll be single for eternity, I really don't give a shit.