Background: 19 year old male, acne since 15. Been on antibiotics in the past, other things too, always dealt with whitehads and redmarks. Now as a university student, I am dealing with an unbelievably horrible breakout. Things just don't get better for me, my life has amounted to this. I need help.
I do not function like a normal person anymore. I can't live my life at all. I've had acne for 4 years, and this is now the worst breakout to date. I don't understand, I truly don't. I try to do everything right, I don't drink or smoke. I am trying to eat healthy. I read so much about how to prevent acne and I get nowhere. Is this hormonal and is there any hope for me? My face is DESTROYED by red marks and stuff already, but all these red bumps and whiteheads make me want to die in public. All I can think about is my face, which makes me even more depressed and stressed. I'm seriously trapped. I can't even shave like a normal person anymore, not that I want to. Shaving always would give me irritation and whiteheads, but I can't even shave my face because of all my redmarks and active acne going on. It's unbelievably frustrating.
Is accutane going to help with this? Will it leave redmarks and scars anyways? I want this GONE, my life is miserable. Is accutane likely my solution or should I look into something else? I am so reluctant of derms, they prescribe me Epiduo and I am just so scared to use it. It makes me redness WORSE and as you can see that's my biggest problem (both in terms of active acne bumps/whiteheads and also I have red marks and scars)...
My skin is so different from everyone elses, I can't even explain it. Also my facial hair is disgusting. The pictures are pretty disgusting just as a heads up. Obviously I put the flash on to illustrate my problems, but even in normal lighting it looks THIS BAD. Please god help me. I don't know what caused this recent breakout of what you see now. A lot of it itches. I am trying to be so healthy right now but I am waking up with NEW WHITEHEADS OR BUMPS DAILY. For the love of god why.
I am not on any products right now. I take a zinc supplement and fish oil. I exercise often. I am so self-conscious. I'm begging for help. I cleanse with cerave gentle cleanser, and moisturize with cerave moisturizing lotion. It's hard for me to even cleanse my face, feeling all my bumps and disgusting acne kills me. I can't look at mirrors, I have become an outcast and I feel like I'm on a horrible path. I cannot just pretend this is not there, I understand people say that and I respect them. But I can't live a normal life when I do not at least look somewhat like everyone else. My skin is absolutely horrible. What should I do? I tried retinoids and BP in the past, never helped much. I'm extremely reluctant to go back on any products - I feel they will only make things worse, make my red marks last longer and scars get more discolored. I know BP is harsh. What do I need to do? Is there any solution for me?
I'm begging for advice. Honestly even the pictures don't do this justice. In even normal lighting, it just looks absolutely disgusting. And I know it's not just me feeling this way. I see people looking at my face. I can't even hold a normal conversation face to face nowadays without wanting to curl up and die. It's pathetic and I don't want to live like this. Please help.