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Member Since 06 Jun 2010
Offline Last Active Aug 27 2015 09:26 PM

Topics I've Started

I've Ruined My Life

19 August 2015 - 01:42 AM

The worst thing about picking your skin is just a few days ago your skin looked amazing. I hadn't picked for ages and then I relapsed and now I've given myself a permanent dented scar on my cheek

As I type this I can feel the stinging and throbbing of the wound on the side of my face. I want to jump out of the window I'm so hideous. I have insomnia and haven't left the house in days or spoken to anyone. I have less than a week to finish a work deadline and I haven't done any of it. I'm just in my room festering away.

This is the worst thing I've ever picked. It started as a large painful cyst and I squeezed. Then I just couldn't stop. It was like all the stress and shit I've been feeling just manifested itself in me destroying my face. I didn't think it was possible but I feel worse. I also have scabs on my chin and other side of face. 

I'm having panic attacks at the thought of leaving the house. I want it to end.

Reducing Red Marks/not Picking! - Progress So Far

30 June 2015 - 03:28 AM


So I have had acne for almost a decade including the cystic type when I hit my 20s which was when I also started picking my skin which has been for 7 years. My skin has lots of red marks and I have devised a skincare routine to try and reduce these and also stop picking. From the following photos I think there has been a bit of improvement in just a week.

Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair Synchronized Recovery Complex II
Epitheliale A.H. Cream - If  I go out I skip this and use Mineral Powder foundation which has SPF.

Super Facialist Rose Hydrate Calming Creamy Cleanser by Una Brennan
Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair Synchronized Recovery Complex II
Epitheliale A.H. Cream

Every 2-3 weeks
Philosophy in-home vitamin c/peptide peel kit

And probably most importantly - NO PICKING AT FACE!!! Alas I did have a slight relapse as evident from the left side of my face but for me to be able stop was a miracle. Plus I have the occasional spot and am able to leave these alone!!!! I really think being able to do so can be partly attributed to no longer giving a f**k about my skin and starting yoga i.e. focusing on something else completely. 

Anyway I'll keep posted on any further progress!

No More Picking!

04 April 2015 - 01:05 PM

Ok I have been moping on these forums for years and came across some of my old posts about not picking. Well I still am and I'm fucking SICK of it!! Yesterday was a clinche moment (if that is right word) when I looked at my red-marked ridden face with a few scabs around the chin...so horrible.


I going on holiday in a few days and I'm so angry with myself. I can't leave the house and I have vaseline smeared over my face like someone has just puked ectoplasm all over me. One good thing is today I haven't picked once. And this is it. I called a derm and have booked a consultation appointment when I get back to hopefully get a chemical peel (never had one before) or something. Things need to change and its got to the point where I realise its up to me to sort this not some miracle cure or epiphany that I've subconsciously been expecting. 


I fully expect some relapses in this journey and whats important is not to allow that shitty depressed feeling as you've just picked to take over otherwise it just becomes a vicious cycle. Just STOP and keep going. I would post some photos to show the progress but I'm too scared to see how bad by skin is. I have taken some but am not going to look at them for a while until my skin has improved. I hope that makes sense lol.


Here goes!

Hair Colour And Red Marks

09 April 2014 - 02:44 PM



I really want to dye my hair jet black but I'm worried it will make my red marks and hyperpigmentation more noticeable because of my sallow skin - are there hair colours (or colors if you're american lol) that make acne and red marks less noticeable?