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Accutane At 32..what's A Woman To Do

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#1 Sankofa1

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 07:36 AM

So about four months ago..I had one of those I broke up with my boyfriends breakout and ran to the dermatologist....they did a series of facial extraction and antibiotic treatments for a very minor breakout, and bammmm somehow it turned cystic. Never really had acne before not to mention cystic...and this kind of cystic just spread daily....one would come..two days later gush out pus...sorry for the descriptiveness and then another would form next to it...leaving red marks behind in its trail...so I opted for Accutane...in the process of waiting I had to move to another state....and thought hey I will just transfer my ipledge...but the new dermatologist...did not want to give the Accutane instead wanted to try topicals...and damaged my skin even more causing a lot more scarring and a face filled with hyperpigmentation very severe....finally I searched and searched and searched to find a derm....to prescribe me this damn Accutane...yay I found one.  He wanted to put me on 80 mgs to start / 40 mg twice a day on my little body of 114 pounds....I opted to start with 40 mgs.... it just seemed way to high a dosage for me.I cant say how much this sudden acne outbreak and red marks everywhere on my face has effected me emotionally and mentally.  I have literally lost 15 pounds with all the stress..and am now working on trying to get it back and exercise...because if my face is getting wrecked I cant let it get all of me...I am trying to be a wonderful mom to my child....but most days its hard...I don't even want to leave the house with this crap all over my face...but I know ii have to overcome it all. So now it is day 5 on 40 mgs....more cysts are popping up as usual...but now my chin is exploding....leaving behind its vicious red marks all over my once normal face....and im praying....this Accutane is gonna save me....and not scar me too bad from the IB...Here goes the first week almost down...will keep u posted and hope u will share your experiences with me also



#2 Welshy

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 08:19 AM

Hi...I did 40mg a day and was about your weight. I was 24....month 3 was when things really turned around. I did 5 months. Back 4 years later though!

Moisturise lots and look forward to clear skin!

Also....never ever be without lip balm!!

#3 Sankofa1

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 08:41 AM

so did u do 40 mg  the whole way through...and what mg are u doing now....I mean maybe I should do the 80 mg I am just afraid of the side effects....im just praying these red marks will go away...and the cystic outbreaks will stop atleast after one month....I feel so ugly right now



#4 Welshy

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Posted 28 July 2014 - 09:32 AM

I'm not on it this time round and dont think i will to be honest. Wasnt worth it for me in the long run. Just back on the boards looking for answers!! I did 40 all the way through. I know it's horrible but at least the end is in sight for you. I hope it works but definitely have some kind of regime for when you're off it.

I used BP every night after until I got pregnant. Now I'm battling again to get it under control.

80 is very high. You will be so dry. Try smaller dose for longer. Seems a lot of people going down that route now.

#5 Sankofa1

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Posted 29 July 2014 - 10:33 AM

Day 6.....After a week of no air conditioner in the hot sun of Arizona...I am praying  I get my air conditioner fixed today. This heat has not helped my skin at all. Today I have decided to try to make some changes while on Accutane....I want this journey to try to be an over all healing experience for me. I believe my sudden case of severe acne is due to me really having a breakdown in my life and not accepting me for me and maybe even allowing the wrong people in my life. So...I am setting new goals....1. to not think about my skin too much in the day....to find new activities that I love....to pray more, laugh more, love more, meditate.....to not be afraid of the scars...to heal not just physically but mentally and emotionally....to exercise, eat more....gain weight....and bring more joy into my daughters life.

 

Unfortunately, I am not ready to go out to malls or big public places because my skin is so messed up right now...but I am taking this time for me....if any of you guys have any ideas or foods u think will help with me gaining weight too healthily please add on. Ive lost over ten pounds in the past few months and I want to work on my overall health and healing. If you are reading this...thank you....and I wish u well on your Accutane journey also. Day 6....



#6 BreakItOutNow

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Posted 29 July 2014 - 11:56 AM

Sankofa1: I'm sorry to hear about the sudden and traumatic onset of cystic acne for you. I never had a problem with it in middle or high school and didn't struggle with it until suddenly as I turned 21. Not the same as 32, I know, but it was still rough. Fortunately, Accutane is very successful and a great treatment option for most people. Clear skin is in your future. 

 

In the mean time, I found that getting back to what I loved and what made me me was most helpful in my darkest moments. I tried to stop focusing on how I looked and enjoy reading and running and doing productive things. I always loved animals and had gotten away from that passion, so I got a pet fish (doesn't sound like much, but it actually helped me regain some perspective regarding what I valued as a person. I placed a pretty heavy emotional burden on that poor fish, but he's doing alright :) Point is, it isn't superficial or vain to want to look presentable to the public, but I think it is easy to get caught up in skin obsession and appearance that we can lose sight of what is most important to us. I was upset that, at 21, I wasn't out hitting up the bars with friends because I felt debilitated by my breakouts. But being on Accutane, I know I'll get those experiences and I am a better, more balanced person because of it. 

 

Being on Accutane is not easy. The side effects are not fun, and the first few months can be really tough. But use this as a time to find what you truly value (art, music, your daughter, etc.). I'm not always the biggest believer that everything happens for a reason, but I think there is always a lesson to be gained from negative experiences. So hold your head up high, get ready for some bumps in the road, and know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Good luck on your course!



#7 Sankofa1

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Posted 29 July 2014 - 06:33 PM

awww thank you Break it out now...how were the first few months tough for you? My biggest concern now with the initial breakouts is scarring which I hear can happen on Accutane. I try to not look in the mirror much since my face is filled with a lot of red marks already...and more bubbly little cystic scabs emerging and I HOPE dying off. For some reason I feel like my acne is different from others. I have been reading a lot , listening to music, and making future plans when things get better...



#8 BreakItOutNow

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Posted 29 July 2014 - 08:57 PM

The toughest part in the beginning for me has been the apprehension. I constantly wondered "is this the IB? Is it going to hit now?!" I am 72 (73?) days in now and I can say my face never exploded into awfulness. There was just a steady stream of breakouts popping up and that was a pain. The scarring potential is real. I never scarred (or at least not much) until the last month on accutane where I got 2-3 deep pitted marks. I'm not real self conscious about them but they aren't fun. Just be very careful not to pick at anything, especially further into your course as your skin gets more brittle. Additionally, for any open wound type things (if you do pick and it is bloody and scabby and whatnot) aquaphor helps a lot and is noncomedogenic I believe. It can reduce scarring potential. Just keep in mind that you can't expect results right away and it's a marathon not a sprint. But it pays off and it is so worth it. Continue posting on the logs as you see fit, but don't use them as an excuse to pick apart every aspect of your skin. I've fallen into that trap myself and had to remind myself that it was probably better to just let it go and try to think about something else for awhile. That said, we're here for you if you need some extra support in these first few weeks.

#9 leelowe1

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Posted 01 August 2014 - 06:31 PM

Day 6.....After a week of no air conditioner in the hot sun of Arizona...I am praying  I get my air conditioner fixed today. This heat has not helped my skin at all. Today I have decided to try to make some changes while on Accutane....I want this journey to try to be an over all healing experience for me. I believe my sudden case of severe acne is due to me really having a breakdown in my life and not accepting me for me and maybe even allowing the wrong people in my life. So...I am setting new goals....1. to not think about my skin too much in the day....to find new activities that I love....to pray more, laugh more, love more, meditate.....to not be afraid of the scars...to heal not just physically but mentally and emotionally....to exercise, eat more....gain weight....and bring more joy into my daughters life.

 

Unfortunately, I am not ready to go out to malls or big public places because my skin is so messed up right now...but I am taking this time for me....if any of you guys have any ideas or foods u think will help with me gaining weight too healthily please add on. Ive lost over ten pounds in the past few months and I want to work on my overall health and healing. If you are reading this...thank you....and I wish u well on your Accutane journey also. Day 6....

 

 

I think these are awesome goals!  I find that not looking in the mirror really benefits my state of mind.  Who gives a crap if people don't like what they see when they look at me - their problem, not mine at all.    I am not a fan of big places either but just walking around outside or taking your daughter to a park means that your focus is on something besides your skin.  Also, starting a journal of your dreams can be helpful - gives you direction for your life.  Keep on praying for the strength to keep on keeping on and you will get it.  You are an amazing person and as God is my witness, you will make it through this.

 

On another note, i found that keeping a log on my acne experiences helped me track progress.  Maybe once a month updates.  You'll also get a chance to connect with others.


Edited by leelowe1, 01 August 2014 - 06:33 PM.

It's a rocky road but like everything else in life, there is always a beginning and an end.  Here's to finding my end.

 

God is good to me..........more than I deserve.

 

James 1:2-4

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.


#10 Sankofa1

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Posted 02 August 2014 - 05:35 PM

finished first pack of claravis 40mg today.....still breaking out..not sure if its the stress or the Accutane..its mostly pustular.. but kind of had a breakdown today...as my life is in pure chaos...and I cant stand the me that is now...but im trying to deal with it....not so well though. Need to find a new direction and hope....for some reason since starting Accutane it seems like my skin looks more prominent with scarring on one side of my cheek and especially on my chin......just really a down day today....I miss my old skin



#11 Sankofa1

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Posted 05 August 2014 - 05:00 AM

Day 13...still breaking out in 2 more new cysts ...this is so frustrating!



#12 Like Moonlight

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Posted 05 August 2014 - 08:43 AM

Keep your head up. Know that your experiencing the initial breakout. Think of it as a good thing. Really what it means is the Accutane is working a pushing out all the acne that was in waiting under your skin.

I was on Accutane for just under 8 months and things got much better around month 3 and by month 5 my face was clear, but I would get acne that cropped up still so my derm kept me on until I went a full month without a single zit. It's a process, remind yourself of that. I think so many people start this medication and expect it to be a miracle right off the bat. It takes time.

Also I was on
40mg, 40mg, 40mg, 60mg, 60mg, 60mg, 40mg
Regimen:
AM: CeraVe foaming face wash, 100mg Spirolactone
PM: CeraVe foaming face wash, witch hazel, Acne.org AHA+
Been taking Sprio since 1/2013

#13 BreakItOutNow

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Posted 05 August 2014 - 08:52 AM

I'm going to echo Moonlight here and offer encouragement. I broke out pretty badly around Day 12-16, cleared REALLY nicely around Day 40, hell again Days 45-60, and since then I've only had 3-4 small things that are barely noticeable and go away quickly (1-2 days). The first two months you just have to get through. Use this time for YOU and doing the things you love. Things are going to clear up and there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Just keep your eye on the long-term goals here. 

 

I also think you should look at the IB as a good thing (easier said than done). Think of it as a layer of clear skin working it's way to the surface and pushing out anything in its way. It's acne's last stand. 



#14 Welshy

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Posted 05 August 2014 - 11:38 AM

Just wanted to say good luck and that I can completely relate to how you feel. I have a daughter who is 7 now but when she was 3 my skin went crazy. Couldnt take her anywhere as I was so self conscious. Lost out on valuable time with her. I did accutane 4 years ago. When you clear you will make up for lost time. For now just enjoy reading books, painting and indoor games.

Im now going through it all again with my 6 months old baby boy. Gutted.

it will work...it takes time....month 3 was where my spots cleared x

#15 Sankofa1

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Posted 05 August 2014 - 06:18 PM

im so depressed tho I don't even know if they will keep me on the Accutane as I started an antidepressant to combat the anxiety and am losing too much weight....I look sickly went from a size five to a 0 which cant help my skin...I almost feel like going all natural but im going to try to be strong..its just the fact its scarring already and my pores and everything looks bigger now and cysts everywhere



#16 Welshy

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Posted 06 August 2014 - 12:17 PM

I know you feel down but by the time your skin clears you will be a different person. The scars.....are they ones that were there before or are they new?

#17 BreakItOutNow

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Posted 06 August 2014 - 01:03 PM

Also keep in mind that scarring is MUCH more noticeable on Accutane because your skin dries out and has nothing to plump it out. I sometimes look in the mirror and even if I'm clear I feel like my scars make me look downright OLD. But your skin will balance out nicely at the end and it will get better. And after Accutane there are scar treatments you an do. Don't fret too much! You're going to be alright! This is just a tough time in the course but it will get better. Just keep taking the pills and passing the time!



#18 Sankofa1

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Posted 08 August 2014 - 11:36 AM

Day I don't know think about  three weeks now..came from derm...she said I should not be doing the 40 mg and really should be atleast at 50 mg...she said the higher the dose the less likely I would still be breaking out and would be more dry...everyone else has told me different hmmm? anyways she said my scars are not too deep and can heal after Accutane and then I can do treatments so now its time for me to get more positive....make some friends...find things to do in the house...and have faith this shit is going to go away...I just hate going out and seeing those clear skin mfs...and my shit is all f'cked up u know!



also...did u guys see blackheads surfacing on your nose..i never even thought I had blackheads all on my nose and now its like dayummmm blackheads just all over my nose



#19 Welshy

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Posted 09 August 2014 - 08:10 AM

Yep....I never knew I had black heads there til they came out! Don't squeeze them though!!

50 is quite high if you're only small but if your derm thinks it's best then go with it! However if the dryness and side effects are too much then you can drop down!

#20 Sankofa1

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Posted 12 August 2014 - 12:05 PM

So about three and a half weeks in..its been a very stressful time for me...so i dont know whats accutane and whats just me breaking out...getting alot of breaking out on chin still and side of face unfortunately...and its still cystic...been feeling really depressed and not sleeping well but its because im in a place in my life when i feel like everything is falling apart. im practically homeless...broke as all hell...and having the worst social anxiety due to this acne and my weight loss. I just hope i overcome all of this...i just want to look and feel normal again






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