Hi, I can't quote anyone so I am going to respond like this.
Something very radical has happened in my life. I have moved and I am being taken care off by the local psychiatry department over here. I think I may have new opportunities now, but so far there is no indication of improvement.
Wow, so this radical change is a good thing, right? Are you going to be under psychiatric care ? Do you think it will help you ? Good luck Alexander, I hope this will be a very positive change in your life
WIshClean - yes, knowing the person face to face and getting to know them in person definitely takes the element of that feeling of rejection away if you are self conscious of things, like your skin. It also seems more natural. You know the person in context and things can develop more naturally. Good luck - hope you keep us posted! It's interesting. I had a needling appointment with a guy a couple of years ago. Great guy. I was talking to him a little bit about my skin issues and he said to me, "Listen. We all have things about ourselves that we don't like or wish we could change. I'm bald. For you, it's your skin". That was eye opening for me. Not that it's cured me of being self conscious, but it framed things in an interesting way.
And just to be clear, my friend wasn't a romantic involvement. Or maybe he intended it to be and I didn't pick up on it bcs I tend to be naive (intentionally) about that kind of thing. We are both in committed relationships (not with each other) He was just someone that I had always felt a deep connection with, and thirty years later, it was still there. Which made it special for awhile, and he helped with the loss of my dad the way nobody else could have. I'm sure part of him disappearing was that the intensity of the contact isn't conducive to keeping your primary relationship intact. Which I completely understand, but it still feels like a loss and it's still painful.
Yes, I agree....face to face meetings take some of the pressure off. I'll update if this new guy turns out to be decent.
A dermatologist said a similar thing to me as the needling guy. He told me he was self-conscious about his height...nobody's perfect.
Oh, so the guy you were texting with did not try to flirt or anything? It's good that you were in a relationship, that way the conversations could only be platonic with him. Maybe his girlfriend didn't like him texting you so much? I have friends who don't allow their bfs to text females in general, which is very extreme but there are a lot of insecure people around.
It's still not cool of him to just disappear though. He owed you an explanation at least, since you go way back.