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Dating With This Face (Pics)

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Just to echo what a lot of people said, you are beautiful whether or not you have acne, scars, whatever. Be proud of yourself for putting yourself out there and don't feel bad because things didn't work out - why be with someone who doesn't want to be with you, know what i mean. We people with acne will always have insecurities about our skin but as someone once told me, bravery is being afraid of doing something and doing it anyway. Take time to love yourself and try again. I am insecure 24/7 and i hide it well - haven't even made an attempt to date in a while but i know that i won't find that special person sitting on my sofa.

There is someone out there for everyone so don't give up

Good luck sistah and keep your head up

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It's a rocky road but like everything else in life, there is always a beginning and an end. Here's to finding my end.

God is good to me..........more than I deserve.

James 1:2-4

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.


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you're pretty good looking. i think you need to smile more i'm sure you'll look 10x better.

you should try dermarolling if your skin really bothers you

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If you have pitted scarring look into Subcision-Suction as well as microneeding. Check out my success


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Honestly, I'd trade my scars for yours anytime!! They're really not as noticeable as you think. I think we'd have to be really really really close up to your face to see them like how they are presented in your picture. No need to worry more than necessary

It's great to know that you're hearing from this guy again!

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My daily routine:

Morning : Wash face with Cetaphil Oil Control Foam Wash, moisturize with Cetaphil Oil Control Moisturizer w/ spf30

Before bedtime: Wash face with Cetaphil Oil Control Foam Wash and apply Tactuo on affected areas

Medication: 100 mg Minocycline/day

Makeup routine:

Primer: B.Kamins Corrective Mattifier

Foundation: Mary Kay Timewise Matte-wear foundation

Set: Revlon Photoready Translucent Finisher


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Thanks everyone. You are putting things into perspective for me. Today I took a photo from the same angle in my bathroom, and my skin looks smoother (I am wearing CC cream as in the first pics, nothing different). It's really messing with my head....one day I look semi-normal, the next I look and feel deformed. It doesn't help that the guy hasn't texted me again in a few days, and even when I texted it took him hours to send back a text with no question or anything. So I gave up. It's getting a bit weird.... I'm starting to feel like he is not that into me and/or playing games. If someone is really interested, they don't do this kind of sh*t, especially when we both said to each other (via texts of course, bc he doesn't have the nerve to do it in person) that we are attracted to each other. All his other interactions seem friendly, not romantic. I don't get men.

post-161609-0-75219500-1397011868.jpg

post-161609-0-75219500-1397011868.jpg


Current regimen: garlic supplements [as needed], Enzymedica gluten blocker [as needed], nicadan [not sure if it works yet]. I try to simplify as much as I can. Don't take more supplements than you need....try one at a time and be patient.

The supplements that really helped me when my acne was at its worst: inositol, DIM [not as frequently now!] digestive enzymes [don't need them every day anymore, only on cheat days], herpanacine & vitamin C with rose hips/ low acid [not every day], regular sun exposure for vitamin D3, superoxide dismutase (SOD) enzyme supplements. NOTE: I do not recommend DIM for long term use, and I do not recommend hormonal creams without doctor supervision.

Lifestyle & Skin Care: acupuncture, regular exercise/ yoga, low histamine diet, avoiding unnecessary stress, balancing skin's PH (using Image Ormedics), using distilled/ filtered water to wash face, occasional high frequency facials...

 

Grocery list:

 

** Find the cause, find the cure **

** If you have a question for me, please ask it publicly so that others can benefit from the discussion**

 

 


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Just to echo what a lot of people said, you are beautiful whether or not you have acne, scars, whatever. Be proud of yourself for putting yourself out there and don't feel bad because things didn't work out - why be with someone who doesn't want to be with you, know what i mean. We people with acne will always have insecurities about our skin but as someone once told me, bravery is being afraid of doing something and doing it anyway. Take time to love yourself and try again. I am insecure 24/7 and i hide it well - haven't even made an attempt to date in a while but i know that i won't find that special person sitting on my sofa.

There is someone out there for everyone so don't give up

Good luck sistah and keep your head up

I am sorry, but I don't believe that. My experiences with people is in direct contradiction with what you said. It is not that someone doesn't like me. The reality is that no one likes me. If there would anyone out there that would like me, then chances are extremely small that I would find that out. I am actually focussing myself now on things that will absolutely get better as long as I put effort in it, like (volunteer) work.

Thanks everyone. You are putting things into perspective for me. Today I took a photo from the same angle in my bathroom, and my skin looks smoother (I am wearing CC cream as in the first pics, nothing different). It's really messing with my head....one day I look semi-normal, the next I look and feel deformed. It doesn't help that the guy hasn't texted me again in a few days, and even when I texted it took him hours to send back a text with no question or anything. So I gave up. It's getting a bit weird.... I'm starting to feel like he is not that into me and/or playing games. If someone is really interested, they don't do this kind of sh*t, especially when we both said to each other (via texts of course, bc he doesn't have the nerve to do it in person) that we are attracted to each other. All his other interactions seem friendly, not romantic. I don't get men.

I wouldn't play games. I don't even want to play games. I think it is best that you call him on that behaviour. Not directly, but more like, "You haven't responded to me in a few days. Are you busy? What are you doing?". Also, I don't judge people based on skin problems. I just don't.

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Just to echo what a lot of people said, you are beautiful whether or not you have acne, scars, whatever. Be proud of yourself for putting yourself out there and don't feel bad because things didn't work out - why be with someone who doesn't want to be with you, know what i mean. We people with acne will always have insecurities about our skin but as someone once told me, bravery is being afraid of doing something and doing it anyway. Take time to love yourself and try again. I am insecure 24/7 and i hide it well - haven't even made an attempt to date in a while but i know that i won't find that special person sitting on my sofa.

There is someone out there for everyone so don't give up

Good luck sistah and keep your head up

I am sorry, but I don't believe that. My experiences with people is in direct contradiction with what you said. It is not that someone doesn't like me. The reality is that no one likes me. If there would anyone out there that would like me, then chances are extremely small that I would find that out. I am actually focussing myself now on things that will absolutely get better as long as I put effort in it, like (volunteer) work.

>>Thanks everyone. You are putting things into perspective for me. Today I took a photo from the same angle in my bathroom, and my skin looks smoother (I am wearing CC cream as in the first pics, nothing different). It's really messing with my head....one day I look semi-normal, the next I look and feel deformed. It doesn't help that the guy hasn't texted me again in a few days, and even when I texted it took him hours to send back a text with no question or anything. So I gave up. It's getting a bit weird.... I'm starting to feel like he is not that into me and/or playing games. If someone is really interested, they don't do this kind of sh*t, especially when we both said to each other (via texts of course, bc he doesn't have the nerve to do it in person) that we are attracted to each other. All his other interactions seem friendly, not romantic. I don't get men.

I wouldn't play games. I don't even want to play games. I think it is best that you call him on that behaviour. Not directly, but more like, "You haven't responded to me in a few days. Are you busy? What are you doing?". Also, I don't judge people based on skin problems. I just don't.

You may not believe it Alexander, but I have the exact same problem. I can't find a decent person to like me for more than a second. My friends and family can't understand why I haven't had a serious relationship in so long, they just think I'm unlucky. In this superficial society, you have to be the best of the best to hold someone's attention for more than a second, or you have to find someone who is not flaky or judgmental. Maybe I'm being cynical, but that has been my experience so far. I don't understand why men will flirt, make compliments, take me on dates, and then flake out....my guess is that: 1. they are not that into me 2. they have someone else.

I honestly don't think it's my fault, since I have gone out with nice guys who wanted to keep dating but I just didn't feel any chemistry. Maybe I need to lower my standards in terms of appearance because this guy is too hot to stay focused on 1 girl.

And yes, I would love to call him out on that immature behavior, but I doubt it will make a difference to him. The dating scene really sucks, I hate going on dates with strangers only to find out I was just wasting my time. You are right to be focusing on yourself instead, at least yourself will appreciate it.


Current regimen: garlic supplements [as needed], Enzymedica gluten blocker [as needed], nicadan [not sure if it works yet]. I try to simplify as much as I can. Don't take more supplements than you need....try one at a time and be patient.

The supplements that really helped me when my acne was at its worst: inositol, DIM [not as frequently now!] digestive enzymes [don't need them every day anymore, only on cheat days], herpanacine & vitamin C with rose hips/ low acid [not every day], regular sun exposure for vitamin D3, superoxide dismutase (SOD) enzyme supplements. NOTE: I do not recommend DIM for long term use, and I do not recommend hormonal creams without doctor supervision.

Lifestyle & Skin Care: acupuncture, regular exercise/ yoga, low histamine diet, avoiding unnecessary stress, balancing skin's PH (using Image Ormedics), using distilled/ filtered water to wash face, occasional high frequency facials...

 

Grocery list:

 

** Find the cause, find the cure **

** If you have a question for me, please ask it publicly so that others can benefit from the discussion**

 

 


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Ok, I wanted to update this thread. I just went out with the same guy again, and most of you were right. He did like me and was waiting to see if I liked him too. I guess I didn't give him enough signs that I liked him....it really put things into perspective for me. Sometimes I don't let guys see that I like them because I'm worried about getting rejected. Because of that, they sometimes feel rejected too. Today on the date I was confident even though we were outside in broad daylight and I was trying not to sweat. I saw a lot of girls with flawed skin and that made me feel I wasn't alone, so I tried to have a good time instead. I hope this helps someone in the same position struggling with self-esteem. Do you think that once I get to know him better I can tell him about my skin insecurities, or will he not understand?

Just wanted to say that this thread has really helped me. I've always had pretty low self-esteem, but then my skin went crazy and I honestly don't think don't think my self-esteem can get any lower. Some days I am 100% convinced that I will never find anyone who could love me.

But I'm slowly working on it. Trying not to be so hard on myself. Because I do believe that we think more horrible things about ourselves than anyone else does.

So thankyou to you WichClean and everyone else who has commented. Its really lifted my spirits and I'll try to remember all this when I'm next at my lowest.

And WishClean your skin looks beautiful.

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Ok, I wanted to update this thread. I just went out with the same guy again, and most of you were right. He did like me and was waiting to see if I liked him too. I guess I didn't give him enough signs that I liked him....it really put things into perspective for me. Sometimes I don't let guys see that I like them because I'm worried about getting rejected. Because of that, they sometimes feel rejected too. Today on the date I was confident even though we were outside in broad daylight and I was trying not to sweat. I saw a lot of girls with flawed skin and that made me feel I wasn't alone, so I tried to have a good time instead. I hope this helps someone in the same position struggling with self-esteem. Do you think that once I get to know him better I can tell him about my skin insecurities, or will he not understand?

Just wanted to say that this thread has really helped me. I've always had pretty low self-esteem, but then my skin went crazy and I honestly don't think don't think my self-esteem can get any lower. Some days I am 100% convinced that I will never find anyone who could love me.

But I'm slowly working on it. Trying not to be so hard on myself. Because I do believe that we think more horrible things about ourselves than anyone else does.

So thankyou to you WichClean and everyone else who has commented. Its really lifted my spirits and I'll try to remember all this when I'm next at my lowest.

And WishClean your skin looks beautiful.

I'm glad this thread was helpful, it has helped me a lot too. We are harder on ourselves....someone once told me to treat myself like my best friend and never say anything to myself that I wouldn't say to a friend. It's helped me cut down on the negativity and on picking on my flaws.

I'm ok with not finding anyone....I'd rather be single than be with someone superficial. I am very independent and I always try to find things to do, even when I don't have anyone to do them with, so I think keeping busy and focusing on your wellbeing is key.

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Current regimen: garlic supplements [as needed], Enzymedica gluten blocker [as needed], nicadan [not sure if it works yet]. I try to simplify as much as I can. Don't take more supplements than you need....try one at a time and be patient.

The supplements that really helped me when my acne was at its worst: inositol, DIM [not as frequently now!] digestive enzymes [don't need them every day anymore, only on cheat days], herpanacine & vitamin C with rose hips/ low acid [not every day], regular sun exposure for vitamin D3, superoxide dismutase (SOD) enzyme supplements. NOTE: I do not recommend DIM for long term use, and I do not recommend hormonal creams without doctor supervision.

Lifestyle & Skin Care: acupuncture, regular exercise/ yoga, low histamine diet, avoiding unnecessary stress, balancing skin's PH (using Image Ormedics), using distilled/ filtered water to wash face, occasional high frequency facials...

 

Grocery list:

 

** Find the cause, find the cure **

** If you have a question for me, please ask it publicly so that others can benefit from the discussion**

 

 


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I'm sorry to hear this, Wishclean. It's sometimes hard to gage things when we're not around the actual person and able to observe the situation. If he is as attractive as you say he is.. He probably as a lot of options out there.. He's may be just toying with your heart to get what he may really wants.. OR It could be the complete opposite.. He may be busy and unable to establish contact or he doesn't want to come across as to clingy. I had a friend that would just let the phone ring on a girl that was interested in him. He would say, "now watch this".. and he would just let the phone ring and ring and ring.. He did this to build more of a desire from the other woman. I can't remember if he actually picked up finally or he totally wouldn't return her phone call till late..

Anyways, I would give him the rest of this week... If he hasn't made any calls by then.. I would either just forget about him and move on or I would do what Alexander recommended and just ask him upfront. You deserve to have an answer and not have someone waste your time. Of course, He may just be busy... Who knows..

*HUGs* Hang in there and don't forget to smile once and awhile..

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I was hoping that this thread would have a beautiful ending. What a dope. You're a beautiful, smart, independent woman and that's going to scare some guys off. Don't let it get to you.

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I'm sorry to hear this, Wishclean. It's sometimes hard to gage things when we're not around the actual person and able to observe the situation. If he is as attractive as you say he is.. He probably as a lot of options out there.. He's may be just toying with your heart to get what he may really wants.. OR It could be the complete opposite.. He may be busy and unable to establish contact or he doesn't want to come across as to clingy. I had a friend that would just let the phone ring on a girl that was interested in him. He would say, "now watch this".. and he would just let the phone ring and ring and ring.. He did this to build more of a desire from the other woman. I can't remember if he actually picked up finally or he totally wouldn't return her phone call till late..

Anyways, I would give him the rest of this week... If he hasn't made any calls by then.. I would either just forget about him and move on or I would do what Alexander recommended and just ask him upfront. You deserve to have an answer and not have someone waste your time. Of course, He may just be busy... Who knows..

*HUGs* Hang in there and don't forget to smile once and awhile..

You are right. I always assume the worst so that I won't be disappointed. I am a nice person, and yet guys always play games with me. I never play games. I will do what you suggested and give him until the end of the week. I have a feeling that I am his saturday filler because his friends are busy, so if he asks me out again I'm not sure I'll be able to say yes...especially if he's only seeing me because he has nothing better to do on Saturdays. Ugh.

I was hoping that this thread would have a beautiful ending. What a dope. You're a beautiful, smart, independent woman and that's going to scare some guys off. Don't let it get to you.

I was hoping that too...I was updating the thread to give other people hope, but it seems that this won't turn out well. Story of my life. I don't know if I have the patience to date someone new after all this...it just feels like a big waste of time.

On a positive note, these past few days I have been putting all my energy into helping people through my job, and it has been very rewarding. Sometimes I think that I'm not meant to be in a relationship because then I wouldn't be able to contribute anything positive to the world. Lame, I know.


Current regimen: garlic supplements [as needed], Enzymedica gluten blocker [as needed], nicadan [not sure if it works yet]. I try to simplify as much as I can. Don't take more supplements than you need....try one at a time and be patient.

The supplements that really helped me when my acne was at its worst: inositol, DIM [not as frequently now!] digestive enzymes [don't need them every day anymore, only on cheat days], herpanacine & vitamin C with rose hips/ low acid [not every day], regular sun exposure for vitamin D3, superoxide dismutase (SOD) enzyme supplements. NOTE: I do not recommend DIM for long term use, and I do not recommend hormonal creams without doctor supervision.

Lifestyle & Skin Care: acupuncture, regular exercise/ yoga, low histamine diet, avoiding unnecessary stress, balancing skin's PH (using Image Ormedics), using distilled/ filtered water to wash face, occasional high frequency facials...

 

Grocery list:

 

** Find the cause, find the cure **

** If you have a question for me, please ask it publicly so that others can benefit from the discussion**

 

 


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I'm sorry to hear this, Wishclean. It's sometimes hard to gage things when we're not around the actual person and able to observe the situation. If he is as attractive as you say he is.. He probably as a lot of options out there.. He's may be just toying with your heart to get what he may really wants.. OR It could be the complete opposite.. He may be busy and unable to establish contact or he doesn't want to come across as to clingy. I had a friend that would just let the phone ring on a girl that was interested in him. He would say, "now watch this".. and he would just let the phone ring and ring and ring.. He did this to build more of a desire from the other woman. I can't remember if he actually picked up finally or he totally wouldn't return her phone call till late..

Anyways, I would give him the rest of this week... If he hasn't made any calls by then.. I would either just forget about him and move on or I would do what Alexander recommended and just ask him upfront. You deserve to have an answer and not have someone waste your time. Of course, He may just be busy... Who knows..

*HUGs* Hang in there and don't forget to smile once and awhile..

You are right. I always assume the worst so that I won't be disappointed. I am a nice person, and yet guys always play games with me. I never play games. I will do what you suggested and give him until the end of the week. I have a feeling that I am his saturday filler because his friends are busy, so if he asks me out again I'm not sure I'll be able to say yes...especially if he's only seeing me because he has nothing better to do on Saturdays. Ugh.

>I was hoping that this thread would have a beautiful ending. What a dope. You're a beautiful, smart, independent woman and that's going to scare some guys off. Don't let it get to you.

I was hoping that too...I was updating the thread to give other people hope, but it seems that this won't turn out well. Story of my life. I don't know if I have the patience to date someone new after all this...it just feels like a big waste of time.

On a positive note, these past few days I have been putting all my energy into helping people through my job, and it has been very rewarding. Sometimes I think that I'm not meant to be in a relationship because then I wouldn't be able to contribute anything positive to the world. Lame, I know.

I am already there. I just stopped caring. If you don't care, then you have no reason anymore to be sad and disappointed. It is not that I stopped talking to girls. It is more that I don't expect something more than that to happen anymore. If something more would happen, then it is pure coincidence.

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^^ That's probably the best way to live life...expect nothing.


Current regimen: garlic supplements [as needed], Enzymedica gluten blocker [as needed], nicadan [not sure if it works yet]. I try to simplify as much as I can. Don't take more supplements than you need....try one at a time and be patient.

The supplements that really helped me when my acne was at its worst: inositol, DIM [not as frequently now!] digestive enzymes [don't need them every day anymore, only on cheat days], herpanacine & vitamin C with rose hips/ low acid [not every day], regular sun exposure for vitamin D3, superoxide dismutase (SOD) enzyme supplements. NOTE: I do not recommend DIM for long term use, and I do not recommend hormonal creams without doctor supervision.

Lifestyle & Skin Care: acupuncture, regular exercise/ yoga, low histamine diet, avoiding unnecessary stress, balancing skin's PH (using Image Ormedics), using distilled/ filtered water to wash face, occasional high frequency facials...

 

Grocery list:

 

** Find the cause, find the cure **

** If you have a question for me, please ask it publicly so that others can benefit from the discussion**

 

 


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Hello,

To be honest i never saw anything wrong with your face in the first two pics.Even in the third pic there was just a little unevenness on your lower left cheek.Nobody can make out from your face that you EVER had cystic acne.And you are so pretty! You talk about dating with that face? You'll get a score of guys who'll want to pursue you :)

Having an "Uneven" personality is worse than having uneven skin. I'm 21 and have flawless girls in my college.Believe me , when they talk , all beauty disappears.Acne is a very humbling experience.So i'm sure with a good personality you'll be even more attractive.Throw the "blues" out of the window and live your life ;)

And yeah... SMILE! don't be so glum.

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Hello,

To be honest i never saw anything wrong with your face in the first two pics.Even in the third pic there was just a little unevenness on your lower left cheek.Nobody can make out from your face that you EVER had cystic acne.And you are so pretty! You talk about dating with that face? You'll get a score of guys who'll want to pursue you

Having an "Uneven" personality is worse than having uneven skin. I'm 21 and have flawless girls in my college.Believe me , when they talk , all beauty disappears.Acne is a very humbling experience.So i'm sure with a good personality you'll be even more attractive.Throw the "blues" out of the window and live your life

And yeah... SMILE! don't be so glum.

Thanks, you are right, I shouldn't feel bad about it. I find it hard to connect with people sometimes, and it's really hard to find someone I am attracted to, both physically and personality-wise. That's why I was disappointed. Like you said about attractive people, they get less attractive when their true colors show. Well, this guy hasn't contacted me at all this week, after he flirted with me through text and then nothing. I don't get why people are so flaky.

I live in a rather big city and all my co-workers are either married or in relationships or gay. So my only hope was online dating. But this guy was seriously the only seemingly normal one in my city. I can't even tell you how many pointless messages I exchanged with losers before finding this guy. He already told me he admires what I have accomplished in my life and definitely likes my personality, so the only other thing I can think of is that he saw physical flaws and stopped liking me as much. Either that or he has someone else. A guy doesn't go from texting me so many times a day and skyping for hours to NOTHING. How is that possible? I wish I had other options, I really do.

Ok, I will try to smile more..this week just wasn't my week at all!


Current regimen: garlic supplements [as needed], Enzymedica gluten blocker [as needed], nicadan [not sure if it works yet]. I try to simplify as much as I can. Don't take more supplements than you need....try one at a time and be patient.

The supplements that really helped me when my acne was at its worst: inositol, DIM [not as frequently now!] digestive enzymes [don't need them every day anymore, only on cheat days], herpanacine & vitamin C with rose hips/ low acid [not every day], regular sun exposure for vitamin D3, superoxide dismutase (SOD) enzyme supplements. NOTE: I do not recommend DIM for long term use, and I do not recommend hormonal creams without doctor supervision.

Lifestyle & Skin Care: acupuncture, regular exercise/ yoga, low histamine diet, avoiding unnecessary stress, balancing skin's PH (using Image Ormedics), using distilled/ filtered water to wash face, occasional high frequency facials...

 

Grocery list:

 

** Find the cause, find the cure **

** If you have a question for me, please ask it publicly so that others can benefit from the discussion**

 

 


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I'm awful at giving advice about things like this, but I just wanted to let you that your skin really does not look bad at all. You are also very pretty I can totally relate to feeling rejected, though, and especially because of physical appearances. For whatever reason, you and him weren't meant to work out. Try not to let this stop you from dating because you will find someone for you who thinks everything about you is great, even your skin! I'm a picker, and sometimes my bf sees me after I destroy my face picking and he still thinks I'm pretty. I think he's crazy lol, but I think there's someone like that out there for everyone. Feel better!

Thank you all for the kind words...I know you are giving me your honest opinion, and I appreciate it.

@bubbles55: At this point, I cannot afford any treatments and I am also nervous to try anything strong like lasers for fear of the acne returning. The little bumps are there sometimes and I had them before so I'm fine with those as long as they don't turn into big cysts. They are usually the last ones to subside once the major cystic acne goes away, so I'm being positive. Scrubs and peels help but I haven't done those recently. I was more worried about the rough texture and scarring.

To the men who answered, this gave me a new perspective....guys are just as insecure sometimes, I have to remember that. I usually assume that if a guy doesn't try hard, it means he doesn't like me and I back off, but maybe I will try a different approach this time.

@lighthousesrule27, I am only wearing a bit of cc cream in this pic, but my inflammation has diminished a lot (I thank DIM for that). Usually the cc cream helps even out dark patches (I have those under my eyes - another insecurity) and fill in scars a little. You are right, confidence is key! I see so many girls who do not fit the conventional "attractive" mould and yet they are in happy relationships with great guys. All your speculations about this guy seem possible, I guess I'll wait until Saturday to find out what exactly he wants from me....I hope it doesn't end up in the friend zone like a previous date of mine did a while ago.

@krissy990: I know exactly what you mean. I actually posted photos of my face a while ago to ask about my scarring, and I couldn't even get the scarring or whiteheads to show up in the picture. This is literally the only photo I could get of my scars. So it really depends on lighting, that's why I was so worried about meeting this guy in daylight, and unfortunately the second date will be outside in the hot sun in the middle of the afternoon. I'm worried about sweating on top of everything else.

Based on my experience, online dating is touch and go. You might stumble upon a great guy or you might end up going out with a total jerk. But if you have been having good conversations with this guy, chances are you will hit it off in person as well. I recommend meeting at a place you feel comfortable in the first time and see how it goes. You might realize YOU don't like him, not the other way round - there's always that possibility. But if he wants to meet you and you get a good vibe from him, then go for it. Life is short. Good luck!!!

I agree with paigems post :) And you are beautiful :) From the pictures I see, i doesn't look that bad. really! I am pretty sure I can relate to how your feeling though! I have been feeling similar to this all week. I hope you find a wonderful guy who loves you for you. And I hope your skin changes for the best!

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Hi everyone (a bit of a long story, read if you are interested),

I haven't posted on this forum for a few weeks due to a very busy schedule. I used to be on here every day, and it helped me get through the darkest time of my life. I took a break from acne discussions to focus on living and enjoying life now that my cystic acne is under control for the most part. I still have small pimples under the surface of my skin, but usually those go away with peels. My scarring and damaged tissue is what is mostly bothering me now, and I'm sick of my family and friends reassuring me that it's not noticeable. I know they mean well, but I want a reality check. I'm really hoping you can tell me what you think, please be honest.

Ok, here's the story. I was starting to gain my confidence back after having severe acne for a year, and I thought I was ready to start dating again after being single for a long time. I started talking to someone I met on an online dating site, and for a month we exchanged texts constantly. I felt an instant connection, and he did too. Then the conversations moved to skype, and every time we videochatted he told me how pretty I look etc. We had intelligent conversations that lasted for hours, I hadn't felt this strong connection with someone in a long time and I didn't think I ever would again. So I finally agreed to meet him in person, and unfortunately we met in broad daylight, and we sat inside a coffeeshop with the sun shining right on my face. I tried not to let that affect my confidence, but he kept staring at me and I didn't like that. We had a good conversation, he asked me a lot of questions and seemed interested in my life, then we went to a movie as planned. However, I just felt that he wasn't that into me anymore. To make things worse, when he drove me back to my car after the movie (it was still early btw), he said "Should we have an awkward hug?" and that was it. The next day, he sent a text late in the afternoon (usually he would text me all day long) saying "had a lot of fun last night." I responded, made a funny comment, and asked him a question....no response until the next day, 12 hours later! Then nothing again until the day after. I even texted him but he just seemed uninterested and the texting didn't continue for long because he never bothered to ask me anything back. I feel so bad about myself right now....I hit an all time low, and I don't know if I can ever bring myself to go out on more dates. This confirmed all my insecurities and my worst fear of being rejected because of my looks. I didn't think this guy was superficial...actually, I was disappointed that he looked flawless (perfect body, cute face, good skin) because I couldn't compete with that.

I just wanted to vent. On top of this rejection, I received a rejection from my dream job and then I also screwed up a very important job interview today because I was distracted. I feel like a failure in so many ways.

I took 2 photos of my face on the same day, from a different angle. The third one I added on April 8th, with my face looking smoother. Is this a mindf*ck of what? How am I ever supposed to feel normal? In most photos and on skype, my face looks smooth, and then up close it's a disaster. What do you think, am I exaggerating or do I have legitimate reasons to believe that I was rejected due to my face? I thought my personality would be enough to make up for some flaws, but apparently even intelligent guys who appreciate smart girls are superficial. :/

*sorry again for this pathetic rant, this is my ultimate low*

Oh my gosh darlin', you are so beautiful I could cry! And guess what? You don't have bad skin! You are like me- we feel badly about the smallest little marks on our skin! I know this is probably no consolation- but I know how this feels. I've felt it for years- sometimes I still do. I did absolute horrible things to myself because I felt so horrible about myself. I'm so sorry you are going through this. About the guy- I truly, honestly believe because you feel so down on yourself you are reading into the situation in a way any of us here would. I'd imagine things probably changed because it's AWKWARD always meeting someone in person for the first time! You know what I would do? I would ask him exactly what you're worried about! People always appreciate others being open and vulnerable with them. And chances are he gave no notice to your skin! And if he did- he is a worthless piece of shit who will NEVER EVER deserve such an amazing, beautiful girl as you!

Seriously though, you are so gorgeous. Please try to be easier on yourself. Feel free to message me anytime. I'm always here to talk.

-Savannah

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WishClean I totally get where you are coming from. Just wanted to say that you're not alone!

Yes, it could have been any number of reasons why this guy is flaky. There was a guy I met online and we chatted for a couple weeks before we met. The chemistry I felt via text/phone conversations was just NOT there in person. It disappointed me!

We went on a second date because I wanted to see if things could change. It didn't. But I loved texting with him! Lol too bad that doesn't make a relationship.

I also have a "similar" thread if you want to read it. It made me feel better about my situation.

Do you think you are brave enough to ask this guy what his deal is?

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Oh my gosh darlin', you are so beautiful I could cry! And guess what? You don't have bad skin! You are like me- we feel badly about the smallest little marks on our skin! I know this is probably no consolation- but I know how this feels. I've felt it for years- sometimes I still do. I did absolute horrible things to myself because I felt so horrible about myself. I'm so sorry you are going through this. About the guy- I truly, honestly believe because you feel so down on yourself you are reading into the situation in a way any of us here would. I'd imagine things probably changed because it's AWKWARD always meeting someone in person for the first time! You know what I would do? I would ask him exactly what you're worried about! People always appreciate others being open and vulnerable with them. And chances are he gave no notice to your skin! And if he did- he is a worthless piece of shit who will NEVER EVER deserve such an amazing, beautiful girl as you!

Seriously though, you are so gorgeous. Please try to be easier on yourself. Feel free to message me anytime. I'm always here to talk.

-Savannah

Thanks Savannah, you made my day :) And I love your signature, it's so true. I am leaning towards worthless piece of shit at the moment, but I don't want to be too negative. I did horrible things to myself too because I never felt that I was good enough...but really, life is too short to feel bad about ourselves. I was feeling angry towards myself after his interest died down, but then I figured that I can't change how I look like or who I am. If he doesn't like it, then he's not right for me. I don't want to feel insecure every time I am with him. I just thought for once I deserved to have a guy who is both intelligent and attractive...I guess he was more attractive than intelligent unfortunately. Did I mention he is supposed to be Buddhist, yet spends all his time at the gym, dieting, making money, and possibly sex (he said he had a high sex drive on the questions on okcupid)... I guess he's only buddhist when it suits him (don't get me wrong, he had a lot of good qualities too, but now his vanity overshadows them). He also lives down the street from me...literally 3 minutes away from my apartment. Now I'm paranoid about running into him at the grocery store or when I go running.

Today I just focused on my health and I kept busy so as not to check my phone.

Let me know if you ever want to talk too! You are a great person :)

I agree with paigems post And you are beautiful From the pictures I see, i doesn't look that bad. really! I am pretty sure I can relate to how your feeling though! I have been feeling similar to this all week. I hope you find a wonderful guy who loves you for you. And I hope your skin changes for the best!

Thanks, I only trust acne.org users and if you all are saying my skin isn't that bad then it must not be. Ironically, since this guy stopped contacted me, my skin has been doing better and looking less tired, despite the fact that I've been comfort eating. So maybe one good thing will come out of this :)

WishClean I totally get where you are coming from. Just wanted to say that you're not alone!

Yes, it could have been any number of reasons why this guy is flaky. There was a guy I met online and we chatted for a couple weeks before we met. The chemistry I felt via text/phone conversations was just NOT there in person. It disappointed me!

We went on a second date because I wanted to see if things could change. It didn't. But I loved texting with him! Lol too bad that doesn't make a relationship.

I also have a "similar" thread if you want to read it. It made me feel better about my situation.

Do you think you are brave enough to ask this guy what his deal is?

Hey Sailette,

I'll read your thread and respond to it. Sounds like you might have felt off like this guy...the chemistry maybe wasn't there for him either. But I am puzzled because he texted me an hour after our second "date" to say: "I have to say you looked pretty sexy today." Why would he lead me on like that? And when I responded "thanks you did too ;) " he didn't continue flirting. I even asked him afterwards if he wanted to hang out the next day and he said his mom was coming to town and he couldn't. A few days later I sent him a simple "how is your day going" and he responded 5 hours later with: "it was good! how was yours?" and when I responded, he never texted back. That was Monday, and he never texted again.

So, my question is, why did he compliment me, then disappeared, and why would he tell me last time we met that he usually is free on the weekends? To me it felt like he was making himself available, and then when he complimented me via text I thought he wanted something more than just friends. So confusing!

I wish I could ask him what his deal was....I might if he ever contacts me again, but he might have just moved on to someone else. It's the rejection and the not knowing why that hurts the most.

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Current regimen: garlic supplements [as needed], Enzymedica gluten blocker [as needed], nicadan [not sure if it works yet]. I try to simplify as much as I can. Don't take more supplements than you need....try one at a time and be patient.

The supplements that really helped me when my acne was at its worst: inositol, DIM [not as frequently now!] digestive enzymes [don't need them every day anymore, only on cheat days], herpanacine & vitamin C with rose hips/ low acid [not every day], regular sun exposure for vitamin D3, superoxide dismutase (SOD) enzyme supplements. NOTE: I do not recommend DIM for long term use, and I do not recommend hormonal creams without doctor supervision.

Lifestyle & Skin Care: acupuncture, regular exercise/ yoga, low histamine diet, avoiding unnecessary stress, balancing skin's PH (using Image Ormedics), using distilled/ filtered water to wash face, occasional high frequency facials...

 

Grocery list:

 

** Find the cause, find the cure **

** If you have a question for me, please ask it publicly so that others can benefit from the discussion**

 

 


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Hi WishClean,

I think my scarring looks very much like yours (though I still have active acne and quite a bit of redness)

I was wondering what you have found that has helped your scarring? Treatments? Topicals? Anything you take internally that you believe has made a difference?

I'm very open to any advice you could give me regarding anything about scars.

Thankyou

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Hi WishClean,

I think my scarring looks very much like yours (though I still have active acne and quite a bit of redness)

I was wondering what you have found that has helped your scarring? Treatments? Topicals? Anything you take internally that you believe has made a difference?

I'm very open to any advice you could give me regarding anything about scars.

Thankyou

Scars tend to get a bit better with time, so I'm just trying to be patient and not overload my skin. I basically take a lot of nutrients internally to help my body produce more collagen (vitamin C and antioxidants in particular) and I noticed that my skin looks healthier. If I don't sleep for 8 hours and do not eat well one day, my skin doesn't look as good. For a quick pick me up, I drink vitamin water zero, the no sugar kind, and that gives me some of those vitamins. And all the other things listed on my signature. Clear touch Light, which is like IPL but cheaper and less intense, has helped my scarring a bit, and so did red light therapy.

Topically, I use a good night cream (Image Cosmetics' Ormedic night creme) that keeps the area moisturized and plumps it up temporarily. When I wake up in the morning, my scars look less shallow, but only if I use the cream every night (it has sodium hyaluronate that helps hydrate and fill in lines).

I also used to use MSM cream, and that actually reduced a rolling scar I had on my cheek.

You are gorgeous.

Thank you, I'm sure you are too :)


Current regimen: garlic supplements [as needed], Enzymedica gluten blocker [as needed], nicadan [not sure if it works yet]. I try to simplify as much as I can. Don't take more supplements than you need....try one at a time and be patient.

The supplements that really helped me when my acne was at its worst: inositol, DIM [not as frequently now!] digestive enzymes [don't need them every day anymore, only on cheat days], herpanacine & vitamin C with rose hips/ low acid [not every day], regular sun exposure for vitamin D3, superoxide dismutase (SOD) enzyme supplements. NOTE: I do not recommend DIM for long term use, and I do not recommend hormonal creams without doctor supervision.

Lifestyle & Skin Care: acupuncture, regular exercise/ yoga, low histamine diet, avoiding unnecessary stress, balancing skin's PH (using Image Ormedics), using distilled/ filtered water to wash face, occasional high frequency facials...

 

Grocery list:

 

** Find the cause, find the cure **

** If you have a question for me, please ask it publicly so that others can benefit from the discussion**

 

 


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Hi WishClean,

I think my scarring looks very much like yours (though I still have active acne and quite a bit of redness)

I was wondering what you have found that has helped your scarring? Treatments? Topicals? Anything you take internally that you believe has made a difference?

I'm very open to any advice you could give me regarding anything about scars.

Thankyou

Scars tend to get a bit better with time, so I'm just trying to be patient and not overload my skin. I basically take a lot of nutrients internally to help my body produce more collagen (vitamin C and antioxidants in particular) and I noticed that my skin looks healthier. If I don't sleep for 8 hours and do not eat well one day, my skin doesn't look as good. For a quick pick me up, I drink vitamin water zero, the no sugar kind, and that gives me some of those vitamins. And all the other things listed on my signature. Clear touch Light, which is like IPL but cheaper and less intense, has helped my scarring a bit, and so did red light therapy.

Topically, I use a good night cream (Image Cosmetics' Ormedic night creme) that keeps the area moisturized and plumps it up temporarily. When I wake up in the morning, my scars look less shallow, but only if I use the cream every night (it has sodium hyaluronate that helps hydrate and fill in lines).

I also used to use MSM cream, and that actually reduced a rolling scar I had on my cheek.

>You are gorgeous.

Thank you, I'm sure you are too

Hi again WishClean,

What kind of scarring do you actually have?

How much improvement do you think can be expected overtime if you leave them on their own to heal (without using harsh products and lasers etc)?

I only noticed my indents about 1 month ago. I am not sure how long they've been there...

They're still red so I am hoping they're still healing and may get better if I do my most to help them.

I am asking this here because the 'scar' section scares me! I don't want to think about horrible lasers and such just yet. I really do believe I can do something nice and natural now that might mean I never have to do any invasive treatments.

Thanks again :)

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I don't know anything about your personality but just going on the photos alone, I would feel very lucky to go a date with a girl as pretty as you =)

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Hi WishClean,

I think my scarring looks very much like yours (though I still have active acne and quite a bit of redness)

I was wondering what you have found that has helped your scarring? Treatments? Topicals? Anything you take internally that you believe has made a difference?

I'm very open to any advice you could give me regarding anything about scars.

Thankyou

Scars tend to get a bit better with time, so I'm just trying to be patient and not overload my skin. I basically take a lot of nutrients internally to help my body produce more collagen (vitamin C and antioxidants in particular) and I noticed that my skin looks healthier. If I don't sleep for 8 hours and do not eat well one day, my skin doesn't look as good. For a quick pick me up, I drink vitamin water zero, the no sugar kind, and that gives me some of those vitamins. And all the other things listed on my signature. Clear touch Light, which is like IPL but cheaper and less intense, has helped my scarring a bit, and so did red light therapy.

Topically, I use a good night cream (Image Cosmetics' Ormedic night creme) that keeps the area moisturized and plumps it up temporarily. When I wake up in the morning, my scars look less shallow, but only if I use the cream every night (it has sodium hyaluronate that helps hydrate and fill in lines).

I also used to use MSM cream, and that actually reduced a rolling scar I had on my cheek.

>You are gor

geous.

Thank you, I'm sure you are too

Hi again WishClean,

What kind of scarring do you actually have?

How much improvement do you think can be expected overtime if you leave them on their own to heal (without using harsh products and lasers etc)?

I only noticed my indents about 1 month ago. I am not sure how long they've been there...

They're still red so I am hoping they're still healing and may get better if I do my most to help them.

I am asking this here because the 'scar' section scares me! I don't want to think about horrible lasers and such just yet. I really do believe I can do something nice and natural now that might mean I never have to do any invasive treatments.

Thanks again

The scarring that is in the photos I posted...I guess it's like icepick/ poke marks mostly and some under the skin bumps that never come to the surface.

I did post some photos a few months ago to ask people what they thought of my scars and they said they can't see them, so I posted photos here from a different angle in bright light to make them appear. Are yours similar?

I'm not ready for lasers or even dermaroller so I haven't looked at the scar forum carefully because I know what people will suggest and I'm not ready. Those treatments can actually trigger more acne, that's what a dermatologist told me, so I'd rather stick with the scars than the active acne.

Since your indents are still red, there's a good chance they will become less dense in a few months. Keep moisturizing because dryness makes them appear deeper.

Vitamin C internally can help, and some people on the scar forum use a topical vitamin C serum but I avoid it because my skin doesn't like anything topical with vitamin C.

Vitamin E can also help (topically and internally), and so can MSM cream. MSM cream actually helped make one of my rolling scars disappear over the course of a month or two, but it usually only works on fresh scars.

I don't know anything about your personality but just going on the photos alone, I would feel very lucky to go a date with a girl as pretty as you =)

Thanks for the compliment. I have a feeling I'll be single for a long time :/


Current regimen: garlic supplements [as needed], Enzymedica gluten blocker [as needed], nicadan [not sure if it works yet]. I try to simplify as much as I can. Don't take more supplements than you need....try one at a time and be patient.

The supplements that really helped me when my acne was at its worst: inositol, DIM [not as frequently now!] digestive enzymes [don't need them every day anymore, only on cheat days], herpanacine & vitamin C with rose hips/ low acid [not every day], regular sun exposure for vitamin D3, superoxide dismutase (SOD) enzyme supplements. NOTE: I do not recommend DIM for long term use, and I do not recommend hormonal creams without doctor supervision.

Lifestyle & Skin Care: acupuncture, regular exercise/ yoga, low histamine diet, avoiding unnecessary stress, balancing skin's PH (using Image Ormedics), using distilled/ filtered water to wash face, occasional high frequency facials...

 

Grocery list:

 

** Find the cause, find the cure **

** If you have a question for me, please ask it publicly so that others can benefit from the discussion**

 

 


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