Rosalie: If you are allergic/intolerant to SSRIs, there is also some evidence for the effectiveness of the tricyclic antidepressant clomipramine for BDD, although tricyclics are quite "dirty" drugs with more side effects (e.g. dizziness, lethargy).
Thank you! I will definitely look into that. It's always good to know your stuff when talking to doctors...
>First off, kudos to you for getting treatment. A lot of people with BDD don't ask for help due to shame, anxiety, etc. I have to completely agree with your psychiatrist. You said you are taking Seroquel instead of Lithium, which only has a 2% chance of causing acne, right? So that means there is a 98% chance that you won't develop any acne while taking it. Those are some pretty good odds. Just keep on taking your meds, and hopefully your anxiety will decrease so that you can make all of your therapy appontments. Therapy is what is really going to make a difference in you feeling better. I know that once I started taking my medication regualrly, my anxiety decreased so that I didn't have anxiety attacks before going to my therapy appointments. Just hang in there, I know you are a strong, amazing girl. I wish the very best to you, and I hope you can start feeling good about yourself; you deserve to be happy.
Thank you... Luckily i also have really supportive/invasive parents that are pushing me to get help. I know its annoying right now, but hopefully all their pushing will help me in the long run. I am definitely sticking to my medication regimen because this anxiety will be the death of me otherwise. It's always such a tricky game finding the right meds and I hope I'll find the right cocktail (pardon the expression) sooner rather than later :/ It's so good to hear that you're doing well and that there is hope! I do NEED to start keeping my therapy appointments instead of canceling due to my insecurities. Have to remember these people are psychologists and their job is to not judge me.
Keep on keeping on, I suppose! Xo
That's wonderful! It's always really helpful to have supportive parents, even if it is annoying. I know from experience, lol. It seems like you have a really good mindset though. Good for you! And thanks! When you mentioned it's a psychologist's job not to judge, it made me remember when I first started going to therapy I had such a hard time talking and opening up because I was afraid I was going to be judged. My therapist picked up on this, and he told me that no matter what I told him, he would not judge me, ever. And after that I really started to open up and make progress. So you are very right about that. Just try and remember that when you are talking to your therapist.
My parents are definitely a great support system, thankfully they always have been throughout my years of struggling. I wish I could say I have a good mindset, but in reality (as I've said) I talk a big game. I know rationally that all the things I say to you guys are true, but it's really not what I believe. I DO want to change the way I think about myself because I'm so tired of fighting. Life shouldn't be about constantly battling with myself. Starting with a new therapist is always such a pain. Building up the trust and letting my guard down is a process, but I'm semi-willing to try and be open minded. As long as I keep my anxiety down I think I may have a fighting chance.
GUNNKE, you are correct. BPD stands for Borderline Personality disorder and DBT is Dialectical Behavior Therapy. I think the only way that I could have access to both the therapies on an affordable level is to be in a treatment facility. My psychiatrist wanted to send me to an inpatient (hospitalization) program so he could monitor me on new medications and so I could receive some intensive therapy. I'm currently living like a hermit because I don't leave my house unless for appointments with doctors. I did have a small triumph last night and took a walk around my neighborhood. Granted it was at nighttime and no one was around, but I won't judge myself because it was difficult nonetheless.
I can completely relate to you in the sense that social and life experiences have basically beaten me to a pulp and left me feeling like a worthless person. Part of the reason I've put off treatment for so long is because I'm using up my family's insurance benefits. I've already used all the emergency room visits up and I'm continually using the speciality doctor benefits due to seeing dermatologists, endocrinologists, psychiatrists, and psychologists. I want to change the way I think about myself because I believe once that happens, everything else will sort itself out. I will be a happier person, I will lead a healthier and happier life, and due to that the things I want will fall into place. Like my skin clearing up the way I want it to. I honestly don't know how I expect to be healthy when I don't go outside, don't exercise, and am basically living in a room. It's obviously ludicrous. Ugh. Why can't this just go away?
Thank you for all the support! I will definitely be having a serious talk with my psychiatrist on Tuesday. I'll update frequently because I love hearing from everyone and feel better knowing I'm not alone or crazy... Xo
Rosalie, firstly well done managing that walk. Just because it was difficult, that doesn`t make it any less of an achievement and you should congratulate yourself for doing it. Also think it`s really positive that you want to change your situation and the way you think - it will help you going forward with therapy
That`s really unfortunate about the insurance situation. Even though I had to go on a waiting list, I`m able to have CBT in the UK via the NHS so I guess I`m pretty lucky. Definitely speak to your psychiatrist on Tuesday about your options.
Savy mentioned in her post about worrying about being judged by her therapist. I felt exactly the same when I started CBT - I actually told the therapist that I felt intimidated and worried about what she thought of me. She reassured me that she would not judge me and I now feel comfortable talking to her about anything. Think this applies to everyone who starts therapy and I`m pretty sure that most therapists are aware of this and will do their best to put you at ease.
That is so great that you have such good benefits out in the UK. Hopefully my psych will have some good suggestions that will give me some realistic options. My appointment is tomorrow. I'm having major anxiety about it. Anytime I know I will have to be in public, my body goes into panic overload and I'm not sure what to do with myself. So far, my day has consisted of pacing my house for an hour, making breakfast and not eating it, then I came on here to get some feedback. I am so grateful to have you guys as support.
Maybe I'll take another walk tonight to remind myself that I'm capable of stepping out the door and experiencing life. Geez, I sound so pathetic.
BTW, I have been in an intensive CBT program before, but that was back in 2007. I barely remember what it's about... Would you guys mind refreshing my memory about what the treatment module is?