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The Realities Of Acne

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#61 fatalbert911

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Posted 11 September 2013 - 04:00 PM

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 

Well for starters yes i do have an f society mentality. Trust me they have earned it. At this point my idea of being happy would be to live alone & just not have to deal with other people. I guess im weird for thinking i cant be happy with a f up face lol

So no plp dont stop me to say it directly to me, but unfortunatly they dont have to because i happen to have good hearing & you can just tell by the way people look at you..

acne, people & life are all connected. My views feed of each other like a big fish getting eaten by a bigger one.

#62 Lilly75

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Posted 12 September 2013 - 12:23 AM

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life.

 

But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc. 

 

And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time.

 

It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people.

 

I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying?

 

Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this:

 




tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

 

 

 on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me...

 

You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 

What if living is hanging out with other people? People were not really interested in me until last Saturday. I am absolutely not joking. You know how old I am. It took me years, I spend a lot of money, joined a lot of clubs and seeking professional help until I met a small group of people who were able to lift me out of my depression and relieve me of my social problems that has affected my career. I am on average 5 years behind everyone else in my age group and I probably have to pay money for my problems.

 

But I am not going to leave it at that. I am going to strike back. I am going to strike back fiercely. Not through violence, but through convincing people that things have to go different in this world.

 

Of course living is hanging out and interacting with other people in one way or another.

And I'm not pretending acne hasn't effected me. It has. I definitely feel I'm 'behind' other people around my age too because I've had acne and they haven't.

 

And when I said 'leave it at that' I just meant to make the point that I don't think someone should have 'hostility' toward all of society or individual people that then effects how they live their life completely. Sure - you/we have every right to be annoyed at people because of things they may have said or done regarding or skin but personally I feel like it's a waste of time in a way - people aren't going to change over night and unless you're actually doing something about it nothings going to change anyway. To me it's a bit like 'taking the high road' in a way... like I could be bitter and angry toward idiots who've judged me, been rude to me, excluded me etc or I can realise that's their problem that they're ignorant and rude and get on with my life - not giving them the satisfaction of seeing me get 'bothered' or depressed etc due to what they did. But at the same time, if someone were to say something to me about my skin or appearance tomorrow, I wouldn't just let them say that - I'd want to say something back to them to make them realise what they said was unreasonable or rude (if it actually was unreasonable/rude that is) - I wouldn't let them 'get away with it' but I also wouldn't fixate on it and let that one encounter effect my view of the rest of society or my ability to enjoy life as a whole.



No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 

Well for starters yes i do have an f society mentality. Trust me they have earned it. At this point my idea of being happy would be to live alone & just not have to deal with other people. I guess im weird for thinking i cant be happy with a f up face lol

So no plp dont stop me to say it directly to me, but unfortunatly they dont have to because i happen to have good hearing & you can just tell by the way people look at you..

acne, people & life are all connected. My views feed of each other like a big fish getting eaten by a bigger one.

 

Yeah I think that is weird that you think you can't be happy with a 'f'd up face' - because I bet your face isn't screwed up and there are people with terrible acne and scarring or burns victims who do still 'somehow' enjoy life and are happy. Not saying that people are always happy - that's ridiculous - but you can try and get the most out of life or you can be miserable about everything.

 

You said you can just tell by the way people look at you which I completely understand- Have you ever thought about the idea that people look at you for reasons other than your skin. Maybe there's something in your hair or you have an 'odd' expression on your face without realising it - this happens to me haha  - I'll notice or think that someone is looking at me weird and my first thought is that they've seen my skin etc but then I realise I've just been standing there with a blank expression due to just thinking things over or worrying - which on me can make me look pissed off or something - even when I don't intend to do that at all. So it was in that case more likely that someone looking at me was due to that rather than my acne. I don't know if you get what I'm saying but I think expression and body language and confidence - even if it's an act or illusion of confidence - really changes what and how people think of you and react or interact with you.



#63 fatalbert911

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Posted 12 September 2013 - 04:31 PM

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 
What if living is hanging out with other people? People were not really interested in me until last Saturday. I am absolutely not joking. You know how old I am. It took me years, I spend a lot of money, joined a lot of clubs and seeking professional help until I met a small group of people who were able to lift me out of my depression and relieve me of my social problems that has affected my career. I am on average 5 years behind everyone else in my age group and I probably have to pay money for my problems. But I am not going to leave it at that. I am going to strike back. I am going to strike back fiercely. Not through violence, but through convincing people that things have to go different in this world.
 Of course living is hanging out and interacting with other people in one way or another.And I'm not pretending acne hasn't effected me. It has. I definitely feel I'm 'behind' other people around my age too because I've had acne and they haven't. And when I said 'leave it at that' I just meant to make the point that I don't think someone should have 'hostility' toward all of society or individual people that then effects how they live their life completely. Sure - you/we have every right to be annoyed at people because of things they may have said or done regarding or skin but personally I feel like it's a waste of time in a way - people aren't going to change over night and unless you're actually doing something about it nothings going to change anyway. To me it's a bit like 'taking the high road' in a way... like I could be bitter and angry toward idiots who've judged me, been rude to me, excluded me etc or I can realise that's their problem that they're ignorant and rude and get on with my life - not giving them the satisfaction of seeing me get 'bothered' or depressed etc due to what they did. But at the same time, if someone were to say something to me about my skin or appearance tomorrow, I wouldn't just let them say that - I'd want to say something back to them to make them realise what they said was unreasonable or rude (if it actually was unreasonable/rude that is) - I wouldn't let them 'get away with it' but I also wouldn't fixate on it and let that one encounter effect my view of the rest of society or my ability to enjoy life as a whole.

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 
Well for starters yes i do have an f society mentality. Trust me they have earned it. At this point my idea of being happy would be to live alone & just not have to deal with other people. I guess im weird for thinking i cant be happy with a f up face lolSo no plp dont stop me to say it directly to me, but unfortunatly they dont have to because i happen to have good hearing & you can just tell by the way people look at you..acne, people & life are all connected. My views feed of each other like a big fish getting eaten by a bigger one.
 Yeah I think that is weird that you think you can't be happy with a 'f'd up face' - because I bet your face isn't screwed up and there are people with terrible acne and scarring or burns victims who do still 'somehow' enjoy life and are happy. Not saying that people are always happy - that's ridiculous - but you can try and get the most out of life or you can be miserable about everything. You said you can just tell by the way people look at you which I completely understand- Have you ever thought about the idea that people look at you for reasons other than your skin. Maybe there's something in your hair or you have an 'odd' expression on your face without realising it - this happens to me haha  - I'll notice or think that someone is looking at me weird and my first thought is that they've seen my skin etc but then I realise I've just been standing there with a blank expression due to just thinking things over or worrying - which on me can make me look pissed off or something - even when I don't intend to do that at all. So it was in that case more likely that someone looking at me was due to that rather than my acne. I don't know if you get what I'm saying but I think expression and body language and confidence - even if it's an act or illusion of confidence - really changes what and how people think of you and react or interact with you.

I guess im just not ready to try & be happy. Im still so angry about the way people have treated me, that now I fail to see myself being one of them For a long time. Although i havent lost faith that i will eventually be one, i do want to be. But for now i just want to be left alone.

Im so use to having people look at me for my acne that, now i think its always that way. I even hear it sometimes when im alone lol. Its like i hear female voices telling me how bad my skin is... i know that isnt normal at all. If i had to guess why this is happening, its obviously some kind of trauma from all the mental abuse i got from people.

But still im emotionally stable aside from the fact that i really dislike people & society in general. Which i think is fairly justified from my experiences.

#64 AlexanderJ86

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Posted 13 September 2013 - 12:55 AM

 

 

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 
What if living is hanging out with other people? People were not really interested in me until last Saturday. I am absolutely not joking. You know how old I am. It took me years, I spend a lot of money, joined a lot of clubs and seeking professional help until I met a small group of people who were able to lift me out of my depression and relieve me of my social problems that has affected my career. I am on average 5 years behind everyone else in my age group and I probably have to pay money for my problems. But I am not going to leave it at that. I am going to strike back. I am going to strike back fiercely. Not through violence, but through convincing people that things have to go different in this world.
 Of course living is hanging out and interacting with other people in one way or another.And I'm not pretending acne hasn't effected me. It has. I definitely feel I'm 'behind' other people around my age too because I've had acne and they haven't. And when I said 'leave it at that' I just meant to make the point that I don't think someone should have 'hostility' toward all of society or individual people that then effects how they live their life completely. Sure - you/we have every right to be annoyed at people because of things they may have said or done regarding or skin but personally I feel like it's a waste of time in a way - people aren't going to change over night and unless you're actually doing something about it nothings going to change anyway. To me it's a bit like 'taking the high road' in a way... like I could be bitter and angry toward idiots who've judged me, been rude to me, excluded me etc or I can realise that's their problem that they're ignorant and rude and get on with my life - not giving them the satisfaction of seeing me get 'bothered' or depressed etc due to what they did. But at the same time, if someone were to say something to me about my skin or appearance tomorrow, I wouldn't just let them say that - I'd want to say something back to them to make them realise what they said was unreasonable or rude (if it actually was unreasonable/rude that is) - I wouldn't let them 'get away with it' but I also wouldn't fixate on it and let that one encounter effect my view of the rest of society or my ability to enjoy life as a whole.

 

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 
Well for starters yes i do have an f society mentality. Trust me they have earned it. At this point my idea of being happy would be to live alone & just not have to deal with other people. I guess im weird for thinking i cant be happy with a f up face lolSo no plp dont stop me to say it directly to me, but unfortunatly they dont have to because i happen to have good hearing & you can just tell by the way people look at you..acne, people & life are all connected. My views feed of each other like a big fish getting eaten by a bigger one.
 Yeah I think that is weird that you think you can't be happy with a 'f'd up face' - because I bet your face isn't screwed up and there are people with terrible acne and scarring or burns victims who do still 'somehow' enjoy life and are happy. Not saying that people are always happy - that's ridiculous - but you can try and get the most out of life or you can be miserable about everything. You said you can just tell by the way people look at you which I completely understand- Have you ever thought about the idea that people look at you for reasons other than your skin. Maybe there's something in your hair or you have an 'odd' expression on your face without realising it - this happens to me haha  - I'll notice or think that someone is looking at me weird and my first thought is that they've seen my skin etc but then I realise I've just been standing there with a blank expression due to just thinking things over or worrying - which on me can make me look pissed off or something - even when I don't intend to do that at all. So it was in that case more likely that someone looking at me was due to that rather than my acne. I don't know if you get what I'm saying but I think expression and body language and confidence - even if it's an act or illusion of confidence - really changes what and how people think of you and react or interact with you.

I guess im just not ready to try & be happy. Im still so angry about the way people have treated me, that now I fail to see myself being one of them For a long time. Although i havent lost faith that i will eventually be one, i do want to be. But for now i just want to be left alone.

Im so use to having people look at me for my acne that, now i think its always that way. I even hear it sometimes when im alone lol. Its like i hear female voices telling me how bad my skin is... i know that isnt normal at all. If i had to guess why this is happening, its obviously some kind of trauma from all the mental abuse i got from people.

But still im emotionally stable aside from the fact that i really dislike people & society in general. Which i think is fairly justified from my experiences.

 

I am angry as well. I've got something to say about this all: Complaining is meaningless without posing an alternative. So, how does being angry work for you so far?

I am personally working on a project that has to change everything. I am going to make the world fair. I have already turned it into my life's work.



#65 fatalbert911

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Posted 13 September 2013 - 04:29 AM

 

 

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 
What if living is hanging out with other people? People were not really interested in me until last Saturday. I am absolutely not joking. You know how old I am. It took me years, I spend a lot of money, joined a lot of clubs and seeking professional help until I met a small group of people who were able to lift me out of my depression and relieve me of my social problems that has affected my career. I am on average 5 years behind everyone else in my age group and I probably have to pay money for my problems. But I am not going to leave it at that. I am going to strike back. I am going to strike back fiercely. Not through violence, but through convincing people that things have to go different in this world.
 Of course living is hanging out and interacting with other people in one way or another.And I'm not pretending acne hasn't effected me. It has. I definitely feel I'm 'behind' other people around my age too because I've had acne and they haven't. And when I said 'leave it at that' I just meant to make the point that I don't think someone should have 'hostility' toward all of society or individual people that then effects how they live their life completely. Sure - you/we have every right to be annoyed at people because of things they may have said or done regarding or skin but personally I feel like it's a waste of time in a way - people aren't going to change over night and unless you're actually doing something about it nothings going to change anyway. To me it's a bit like 'taking the high road' in a way... like I could be bitter and angry toward idiots who've judged me, been rude to me, excluded me etc or I can realise that's their problem that they're ignorant and rude and get on with my life - not giving them the satisfaction of seeing me get 'bothered' or depressed etc due to what they did. But at the same time, if someone were to say something to me about my skin or appearance tomorrow, I wouldn't just let them say that - I'd want to say something back to them to make them realise what they said was unreasonable or rude (if it actually was unreasonable/rude that is) - I wouldn't let them 'get away with it' but I also wouldn't fixate on it and let that one encounter effect my view of the rest of society or my ability to enjoy life as a whole.

 

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 
Well for starters yes i do have an f society mentality. Trust me they have earned it. At this point my idea of being happy would be to live alone & just not have to deal with other people. I guess im weird for thinking i cant be happy with a f up face lolSo no plp dont stop me to say it directly to me, but unfortunatly they dont have to because i happen to have good hearing & you can just tell by the way people look at you..acne, people & life are all connected. My views feed of each other like a big fish getting eaten by a bigger one.
 Yeah I think that is weird that you think you can't be happy with a 'f'd up face' - because I bet your face isn't screwed up and there are people with terrible acne and scarring or burns victims who do still 'somehow' enjoy life and are happy. Not saying that people are always happy - that's ridiculous - but you can try and get the most out of life or you can be miserable about everything. You said you can just tell by the way people look at you which I completely understand- Have you ever thought about the idea that people look at you for reasons other than your skin. Maybe there's something in your hair or you have an 'odd' expression on your face without realising it - this happens to me haha  - I'll notice or think that someone is looking at me weird and my first thought is that they've seen my skin etc but then I realise I've just been standing there with a blank expression due to just thinking things over or worrying - which on me can make me look pissed off or something - even when I don't intend to do that at all. So it was in that case more likely that someone looking at me was due to that rather than my acne. I don't know if you get what I'm saying but I think expression and body language and confidence - even if it's an act or illusion of confidence - really changes what and how people think of you and react or interact with you.
I guess im just not ready to try & be happy. Im still so angry about the way people have treated me, that now I fail to see myself being one of them For a long time. Although i havent lost faith that i will eventually be one, i do want to be. But for now i just want to be left alone.Im so use to having people look at me for my acne that, now i think its always that way. I even hear it sometimes when im alone lol. Its like i hear female voices telling me how bad my skin is... i know that isnt normal at all. If i had to guess why this is happening, its obviously some kind of trauma from all the mental abuse i got from people.But still im emotionally stable aside from the fact that i really dislike people & society in general. Which i think is fairly justified from my experiences. 
I am angry as well. I've got something to say about this all: Complaining is meaningless without posing an alternative. So, how does being angry work for you so far?I am personally working on a project that has to change everything. I am going to make the world fair. I have already turned it into my life's work.

Hey up early checking the forums & wanted to reply. Well it Helps when im feeling down, i like replacing sadness with anger. But id prefer to just be ok about it.

Gl with making the world fair

#66 AlexanderJ86

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Posted 13 September 2013 - 05:15 AM

 

 

 

 

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 
What if living is hanging out with other people? People were not really interested in me until last Saturday. I am absolutely not joking. You know how old I am. It took me years, I spend a lot of money, joined a lot of clubs and seeking professional help until I met a small group of people who were able to lift me out of my depression and relieve me of my social problems that has affected my career. I am on average 5 years behind everyone else in my age group and I probably have to pay money for my problems. But I am not going to leave it at that. I am going to strike back. I am going to strike back fiercely. Not through violence, but through convincing people that things have to go different in this world.
 Of course living is hanging out and interacting with other people in one way or another.And I'm not pretending acne hasn't effected me. It has. I definitely feel I'm 'behind' other people around my age too because I've had acne and they haven't. And when I said 'leave it at that' I just meant to make the point that I don't think someone should have 'hostility' toward all of society or individual people that then effects how they live their life completely. Sure - you/we have every right to be annoyed at people because of things they may have said or done regarding or skin but personally I feel like it's a waste of time in a way - people aren't going to change over night and unless you're actually doing something about it nothings going to change anyway. To me it's a bit like 'taking the high road' in a way... like I could be bitter and angry toward idiots who've judged me, been rude to me, excluded me etc or I can realise that's their problem that they're ignorant and rude and get on with my life - not giving them the satisfaction of seeing me get 'bothered' or depressed etc due to what they did. But at the same time, if someone were to say something to me about my skin or appearance tomorrow, I wouldn't just let them say that - I'd want to say something back to them to make them realise what they said was unreasonable or rude (if it actually was unreasonable/rude that is) - I wouldn't let them 'get away with it' but I also wouldn't fixate on it and let that one encounter effect my view of the rest of society or my ability to enjoy life as a whole.

 

No one's saying you're responsible for other people being rude and ignorant etc - that's their problem. So you can leave it at that - being their problem - and get on with your life. But it's your choice to then have a 'screw all of society for being idiots' attitude and being negative about everything (that's just how I feel you're coming across - sorry if I have it wrong) instead of just realising that only a few people have been like that and that there are still decent, kind people out there and that yes, you can still enjoy life etc.  And it's my choice to try and be positive and to still enjoy life - because I can still do that. It's still an option. Acne / bad skin doesn't change that! The fact that I have had bad acne in the past, and that I'm still dealing with it now (it's more light now) as well as with a lot of PIH, does not change the fact I can still enjoy life. Why would I want to waste the rest of my life feeling miserable when I've already wasted enough of it due to me holding myself back because of acne?? Yes, you will encounter idiots who judge you on your skin or will say something stupid - but that's rare really. And who needs people like that. If you meet someone like that, ignore them, move on. They're not worth your time. It's not an 'act.' I'm not being delusional. It's all to do with a persons attitude and willpower I think. But I guess it's easier said than done for some people. I don't know... I just don't get why you seem so closed to the idea or possibility of still having a good time and enjoying life. Isn't it worth trying? Also just out of curiousity - a  few posts ago you said this: 

tell me how is someone gonna forget about it when its mentioned by almost everyone that sees you? i want to live normaly but society wont let me. Im treated as a joke, people can go fuk themselves

   on an average day when you go out - how many people actually stop and comment to you about your skin? I find it really hard to believe that nearly everyone that sees you will mention your skin - no matter it's condition. My skin is worse than how yours is in the pics and I don't have people stopping me. Have I just been lucky in recent years? I have had someone say things in the past (when my skin was worse than it is now) but that was one person years ago. So one person, in 8 or so years of acne, saying something to me... You don't need to forget about acne / your skin. I think that's near impossible. But you just need to worry about it less or change your perspective on life or society (whatever) a bit. Society doesn't care how you live. I don't think people are treating you like a joke. It's up to you to make life what you want it to be for you. It really is. 
Well for starters yes i do have an f society mentality. Trust me they have earned it. At this point my idea of being happy would be to live alone & just not have to deal with other people. I guess im weird for thinking i cant be happy with a f up face lolSo no plp dont stop me to say it directly to me, but unfortunatly they dont have to because i happen to have good hearing & you can just tell by the way people look at you..acne, people & life are all connected. My views feed of each other like a big fish getting eaten by a bigger one.ockquote>  Yeah I think that is weird that you think you can't be happy with a 'f'd up face' - because I bet your face isn't screwed up and there are people with terrible acne and scarring or burns victims who do still 'somehow' enjoy life and are happy. Not saying that people are always happy - that's ridiculous - but you can try and get the most out of life or you can be miserable about everything. You said you can just tell by the way people look at you which I completely understand- Have you ever thought about the idea that people look at you for reasons other than your skin. Maybe there's something in your hair or you have an 'odd' expression on your face without realising it - this happens to me haha  - I'll notice or think that someone is looking at me weird and my first thought is that they've seen my skin etc but then I realise I've just been standing there with a blank expression due to just thinking things over or worrying - which on me can make me look pissed off or something - even when I don't intend to do that at all. So it was in that case more likely that someone looking at me was due to that rather than my acne. I don't know if you get what I'm saying but I think expression and body language and confidence - even if it's an act or illusion of confidence - really changes what and how people think of you and react or interact with you.
I guess im just not ready to try & be happy. Im still so angry about the way people have treated me, that now I fail to see myself being one of them For a long time. Although i havent lost faith that i will eventually be one, i do want to be. But for now i just want to be left alone.Im so use to having people look at me for my acne that, now i think its always that way. I even hear it sometimes when im alone lol. Its like i hear female voices telling me how bad my skin is... i know that isnt normal at all. If i had to guess why this is happening, its obviously some kind of trauma from all the mental abuse i got from people.But still im emotionally stable aside from the fact that i really dislike people & society in general. Which i think is fairly justified from my experiences. 
I am angry as well. I've got something to say about this all: Complaining is meaningless without posing an alternative. So, how does being angry work for you so far?I am personally working on a project that has to change everything. I am going to make the world fair. I have already turned it into my life's work.

Hey up early checking the forums & wanted to reply. Well it Helps when im feeling down, i like replacing sadness with anger. But id prefer to just be ok about it.

Gl with making the world fair

 

Do you think you feel okay when you are complaining on a forum?



#67 AghhNe

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Posted 14 September 2013 - 06:35 AM

I totally understand you. Sometimes i wish people who judge us have acne too so they would understand what they are doing.

But, you know what, i have such awesome friends. Even if i burnt my face, i woudnt be coincious about it around them.
There are good people in this world. People who wont judge you, and my friends never looked at me like i am disgusting even on my worst days. They only look at me (on my eyes) when im talking to them and they are talking to me.

Find those special people and im sure one day, you'll find happiness and comfort.

Though i admit, there are more bad ones than good ones.

#68 fatalbert911

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Posted 26 September 2013 - 09:29 PM

To alexanderj86: on your last reply, i dont see it as just complaining. I feel its more of a chronicle of my experiences as well as an informative piece for people.

Edited by fatalbert911, 26 September 2013 - 09:46 PM.


#69 fatalbert911

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Posted 29 September 2013 - 11:50 PM

Crap I was going to upload a void but I guess it's too big sorry guys... maybe it's my phone idn.

Edited by fatalbert911, 30 September 2013 - 12:03 AM.


#70 ceairanicholle

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Posted 07 October 2013 - 07:59 PM

@fatalbert911
Before I even registered here today, I read your post and you claim to have horrible skin and people tell you you're ugly.
I went and looked at the 4 photos you posted.
YOU AREN'T UGLY and your skin is 10 times better than mine ever will be. I wish my skin looked like yours.
You should try to focus on positive things.
-could be a lot worse.

#71 fatalbert911

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Posted 08 October 2013 - 12:59 PM

@fatalbert911Before I even registered here today, I read your post and you claim to have horrible skin and people tell you you're ugly.I went and looked at the 4 photos you posted.YOU AREN'T UGLY and your skin is 10 times better than mine ever will be. I wish my skin looked like yours.You should try to focus on positive things.-could be a lot worse.

hey how's it going, thanks. I wish other people thought so too. Welcome to the threads & thanks for replying.

#72 CookieJ

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Posted 08 October 2013 - 01:38 PM

@fatalbert911Before I even registered here today, I read your post and you claim to have horrible skin and people tell you you're ugly.I went and looked at the 4 photos you posted.YOU AREN'T UGLY and your skin is 10 times better than mine ever will be. I wish my skin looked like yours.You should try to focus on positive things.-could be a lot worse.

hey how's it going, thanks. I wish other people thought so too. Welcome to the threads & thanks for replying.

 

I just took a look at your pics and I literally can't see anything wrong with your skin!?



#73 AlexanderJ86

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Posted 09 October 2013 - 04:25 AM

@fatalbert911Before I even registered here today, I read your post and you claim to have horrible skin and people tell you you're ugly.I went and looked at the 4 photos you posted.YOU AREN'T UGLY and your skin is 10 times better than mine ever will be. I wish my skin looked like yours.You should try to focus on positive things.-could be a lot worse.

hey how's it going, thanks. I wish other people thought so too. Welcome to the threads & thanks for replying.

Why aren't you going to test it? I test whether people like me or not. So far people are actually acting nice to me these days, which is a 100% improvement over the past, but they still don't really care about me. There is still room for improvement.



#74 AghhNe

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Posted 09 October 2013 - 03:49 PM

yea, i still dont get it. You have nothing wrong with your skin. I mean, sure you dont have baby smooth skin that children have but your skin is above average for your age.
Really. I am serious.



#75 SNDR

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Posted 09 October 2013 - 03:57 PM

I cannot believe how many of you are telling the OP to stop whining or saying negative comments based on his feelings and views. He's allowed to vent and say what he feels. He's not hurting anyone, he's not being rude or obnoxious, he's telling it how it is based on his life. Do I think he should try a bit harder to help himself? Yes. Of course, but it's not as easy to snap yourself out of a deep depression, I know this first hand.

Many of us can relate to the way he feels and just because you're able to overcome your problems and or your depression, doesn't mean it's easier or easy for everybody else to just take your advice and ride the high horse out of depression town.

The OP didn't come here to whine about his problem (however severe it may be, if it effects him to the point of severe depression, maybe you should be a little more respectful and understanding where he's coming from and try to talk it out with him without trying to pity him and ESPECIALLY without writing disgusting paragraphs about how it's own doing, or that there's other people off worse than he is). He came here to let his story and views be heard, not to start controversy and have people tell him his problem is nothing to be depressed about, etc. Maybe he does need to speak to someone and maybe he doesn't want to admit it but he needs to let it out to people who understand him because he feels he doesn't have anyone else to speak to? Well guess what, the lot of you should be ashamed (not the people trying to provide positive feedback and support). The rude people here know who they are.

 

This forum is about people with a common problem trying to get through it together, to lend a helping hand to each other. There should be NO REASON to put him down in any way or complain that he's whining or anything of the sort. The ONLY reason anyone on here has the right to say anything negative to another person is if they're being a rude person to begin with, like a few of you were towards him.

 

As you could see in his posts, he didn't rebuttal negatively to any of your negative comments that were posted about him. He should be giving some of you advice on how to, even when in a sensitive topic like this, act civilized and respectful without childish remarks that are doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO HELP.

 

Some people are born mentally stronger than others, some are physically stronger, some people are smarter than others. Mentally, he seems in a state of depression and confusion, but does that mean we should call him weak minded and that he's doing it all to himself and to man up and to stop whining, etc.? Definitely. Not. Going. To. Help. Yet some of you chose to be rude even though he wasn't trying to be; the poor guy was just expressing himself, no matter how raw it was for you people to read, that does NOT give you the right to say these things to him. There's always more than one way to do things, and the right way is to, EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T WANT IT, provide some insight and make him feel like he's not alone, and hell, help him even if he doesn't want it until he tells you to not too. I bet you 100 to 1 that even though he says he doesn't want anyone's pity or help, it's better hearing people sympathize and trying to lend out help rather than saying rude disgusting things to him. If your advice is for him to try to pick himself up and dust himself off, clearly you could say it with a lot more respect.

I'm tired of seeing these unhelpful comments and even the people comparing one persons problems to another. Everyone has problems, telling someone about how another person has it worse isn't going to make his mentality a stone fortress and make him immediately forget about the pain that acne has caused him. He is hurting, he is a human being, no matter what the problem is, speaking the way that some of you did, is just not cool and I always lose more and more respect for humanity the more I see how the vast majority really is. NOW can you at least understand a little more why he has lost faith in humanity? The evidence is on this thread right here. It seems where ever he goes, for whatever reason, even to get help. There's always those people that put him down when all he's trying to do is help himself by venting. It would have been a lot more respectful and helpful if the rude ones here just never posted.

Do you think he wants to be this way? Do you think he wants to vent on a forum about the depression in his life and his unfortunate battle with his mental well being? Do you think that he wants to upset you by posting this thread? Do you think he wants or cares if anyone sees life the way he does? The answer is NO. He just wants to share his story with fellow acne sufferers. I don't care if your acne is worse or better than his condition, everyone's got their problems and just because yours seems to be worse to you or is a lot more detrimental to your health, doesn't mean his depression is something to be mocked.

I'm sorry for rambling on, but I just got fed up by some of the comments I read and I'm not a mean person but to those of you who were acting rude for no apparent reason, I'd kindly like for you to never post again when someone is venting. You do not know how to help, nor do I think you care about helping anyone else but yourself because if you did, you'd understand that what was said here by the OP, was NO REASON to write those comments the way some of you did. I mean the OP seems like a decent human being and as much as he doesn't want it, he needs help from those of us who actually care and understand, and if he doesn't want to take the advice, so be it. He's not hurting anyone, and he may be hurting himself, but it's not on purpose and it's not easy for him to not think that way. Believe me I can relate.

In conclusion, I would like for ALL of you to think for a minute. In your mind, really put yourself in his shoes. Just think how he's thinking, why he's thinking it, what causes are behind it, etc. and if you come back here and write a response saying how it's not as hard as he makes it seem to get out of this rut, then please don't bother replying back to any of these points because as I said earlier, not everyone has a stone hard mentality where they can over come any or many of life's problems. Everyone's different and I bet he has tried very hard to help himself to no avail and a venting on a forum where he felt welcome might have been something to get him closer to developing a stronger mind and a stronger urge to better his life, yet I don't see many people trying to relate or sympathize with him, all I see is people being rude towards him, comparing other peoples problems with his own, calling him names and being absolutely careless, arguing what he said rather than trying to help. I may not have a strong mentality, but I am building it, and it's hard for me, but that doesn't mean it's hard for you. Maybe all he needs is a positive place to turn, to help him progressively build up his happiness again; Well, that's probably gone now, thanks to the few of you who were rude and the others who compared his problems instead of leveling with him. This is one perfect reason why he can't get along in society, it's because everywhere he turns, he gets the same bullshit replies over and over and the same rude comments over and over.

 

I'm sick of it and I hope I have changed some of your minds to be more respectful in the future and change your approach on these types of situations. Just remember this, he is depressed, there's no doubt about it. Should we act hard and cruel, or kind and supportive? You decide, but please remember, it's not always the persons fault that their depressed. Some of you are strong mentally, some of you are getting there, some of you aren't. I'm not. Are you going to call me a "phaggot" or tell me that I'm whining if I just need a person too talk to? Or would you rather tell a suicidal person to stop whining. Pathetic, really. For Shame.

If no one else was going to stick up for him, I had to
and sorry if anyone thought any of my comments were rude but if you want to reply to my points,
please be kind and respectful.
Thanks.


Edited by AndySoprano, 09 October 2013 - 04:06 PM.


#76 jfiligree

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Posted 09 October 2013 - 09:28 PM

I cannot believe how many of you are telling the OP to stop whining or saying negative comments based on his feelings and views. He's allowed to vent and say what he feels. He's not hurting anyone, he's not being rude or obnoxious, he's telling it how it is based on his life. Do I think he should try a bit harder to help himself? Yes. Of course, but it's not as easy to snap yourself out of a deep depression, I know this first hand.

Many of us can relate to the way he feels and just because you're able to overcome your problems and or your depression, doesn't mean it's easier or easy for everybody else to just take your advice and ride the high horse out of depression town.

The OP didn't come here to whine about his problem (however severe it may be, if it effects him to the point of severe depression, maybe you should be a little more respectful and understanding where he's coming from and try to talk it out with him without trying to pity him and ESPECIALLY without writing disgusting paragraphs about how it's own doing, or that there's other people off worse than he is). He came here to let his story and views be heard, not to start controversy and have people tell him his problem is nothing to be depressed about, etc. Maybe he does need to speak to someone and maybe he doesn't want to admit it but he needs to let it out to people who understand him because he feels he doesn't have anyone else to speak to? Well guess what, the lot of you should be ashamed (not the people trying to provide positive feedback and support). The rude people here know who they are.

 

This forum is about people with a common problem trying to get through it together, to lend a helping hand to each other. There should be NO REASON to put him down in any way or complain that he's whining or anything of the sort. The ONLY reason anyone on here has the right to say anything negative to another person is if they're being a rude person to begin with, like a few of you were towards him.

 

As you could see in his posts, he didn't rebuttal negatively to any of your negative comments that were posted about him. He should be giving some of you advice on how to, even when in a sensitive topic like this, act civilized and respectful without childish remarks that are doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO HELP.

 

Some people are born mentally stronger than others, some are physically stronger, some people are smarter than others. Mentally, he seems in a state of depression and confusion, but does that mean we should call him weak minded and that he's doing it all to himself and to man up and to stop whining, etc.? Definitely. Not. Going. To. Help. Yet some of you chose to be rude even though he wasn't trying to be; the poor guy was just expressing himself, no matter how raw it was for you people to read, that does NOT give you the right to say these things to him. There's always more than one way to do things, and the right way is to, EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T WANT IT, provide some insight and make him feel like he's not alone, and hell, help him even if he doesn't want it until he tells you to not too. I bet you 100 to 1 that even though he says he doesn't want anyone's pity or help, it's better hearing people sympathize and trying to lend out help rather than saying rude disgusting things to him. If your advice is for him to try to pick himself up and dust himself off, clearly you could say it with a lot more respect.

I'm tired of seeing these unhelpful comments and even the people comparing one persons problems to another. Everyone has problems, telling someone about how another person has it worse isn't going to make his mentality a stone fortress and make him immediately forget about the pain that acne has caused him. He is hurting, he is a human being, no matter what the problem is, speaking the way that some of you did, is just not cool and I always lose more and more respect for humanity the more I see how the vast majority really is. NOW can you at least understand a little more why he has lost faith in humanity? The evidence is on this thread right here. It seems where ever he goes, for whatever reason, even to get help. There's always those people that put him down when all he's trying to do is help himself by venting. It would have been a lot more respectful and helpful if the rude ones here just never posted.

Do you think he wants to be this way? Do you think he wants to vent on a forum about the depression in his life and his unfortunate battle with his mental well being? Do you think that he wants to upset you by posting this thread? Do you think he wants or cares if anyone sees life the way he does? The answer is NO. He just wants to share his story with fellow acne sufferers. I don't care if your acne is worse or better than his condition, everyone's got their problems and just because yours seems to be worse to you or is a lot more detrimental to your health, doesn't mean his depression is something to be mocked.

I'm sorry for rambling on, but I just got fed up by some of the comments I read and I'm not a mean person but to those of you who were acting rude for no apparent reason, I'd kindly like for you to never post again when someone is venting. You do not know how to help, nor do I think you care about helping anyone else but yourself because if you did, you'd understand that what was said here by the OP, was NO REASON to write those comments the way some of you did. I mean the OP seems like a decent human being and as much as he doesn't want it, he needs help from those of us who actually care and understand, and if he doesn't want to take the advice, so be it. He's not hurting anyone, and he may be hurting himself, but it's not on purpose and it's not easy for him to not think that way. Believe me I can relate.

In conclusion, I would like for ALL of you to think for a minute. In your mind, really put yourself in his shoes. Just think how he's thinking, why he's thinking it, what causes are behind it, etc. and if you come back here and write a response saying how it's not as hard as he makes it seem to get out of this rut, then please don't bother replying back to any of these points because as I said earlier, not everyone has a stone hard mentality where they can over come any or many of life's problems. Everyone's different and I bet he has tried very hard to help himself to no avail and a venting on a forum where he felt welcome might have been something to get him closer to developing a stronger mind and a stronger urge to better his life, yet I don't see many people trying to relate or sympathize with him, all I see is people being rude towards him, comparing other peoples problems with his own, calling him names and being absolutely careless, arguing what he said rather than trying to help. I may not have a strong mentality, but I am building it, and it's hard for me, but that doesn't mean it's hard for you. Maybe all he needs is a positive place to turn, to help him progressively build up his happiness again; Well, that's probably gone now, thanks to the few of you who were rude and the others who compared his problems instead of leveling with him. This is one perfect reason why he can't get along in society, it's because everywhere he turns, he gets the same bullshit replies over and over and the same rude comments over and over.

 

I'm sick of it and I hope I have changed some of your minds to be more respectful in the future and change your approach on these types of situations. Just remember this, he is depressed, there's no doubt about it. Should we act hard and cruel, or kind and supportive? You decide, but please remember, it's not always the persons fault that their depressed. Some of you are strong mentally, some of you are getting there, some of you aren't. I'm not. Are you going to call me a "phaggot" or tell me that I'm whining if I just need a person too talk to? Or would you rather tell a suicidal person to stop whining. Pathetic, really. For Shame.

If no one else was going to stick up for him, I had to
and sorry if anyone thought any of my comments were rude but if you want to reply to my points,
please be kind and respectful.
Thanks.

I'll play devil's advocate here.  Generally, if people are going to join a forum for their acne, they either don't know how to treat it or they have it bad.  Most people checking out the emotional/psychological section have the latter - severe acne.  When my acne turned from mild to severe, it was like a flip was switched and I lost all my self worth and confidence.  It totally changed how I view people complaining about a tiny zit (I used to be one of those people).  For the people with severe acne, it can completely consume your life - not just one day of a tiny zit.  Potentially years of anxiety over scarring to boot.  People are reacting so strongly to OP because he is the person complaining about the tiny zit.  It's like being the obese girl who hears a skinny girl say she needs to lose weight.  

 

Sometimes people do need a wake up call - OP has normal skin.  Not airbrushed, not poreless, not glowing, but normal.  Nothing to complain about (and if it weren't his skin, it'd be something else!  The media is designed to invent nonexistent "problems").  More than likely, (personal opinion) he has BDD and needs professional help judging by his reaction.  Instead he goes to an acne forum to the emotional section with extremely vulnerable people with "real" issues and says things like "Forget about having a good time, unless it's by yourself."  He's not just going down by himself, he's dragging everyone else with him, which to me seems selfish.  I still think he should get professional help though.



#77 AlexanderJ86

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Posted 10 October 2013 - 01:58 AM

I cannot believe how many of you are telling the OP to stop whining or saying negative comments based on his feelings and views. He's allowed to vent and say what he feels. He's not hurting anyone, he's not being rude or obnoxious, he's telling it how it is based on his life. Do I think he should try a bit harder to help himself? Yes. Of course, but it's not as easy to snap yourself out of a deep depression, I know this first hand.

Many of us can relate to the way he feels and just because you're able to overcome your problems and or your depression, doesn't mean it's easier or easy for everybody else to just take your advice and ride the high horse out of depression town.

The OP didn't come here to whine about his problem (however severe it may be, if it effects him to the point of severe depression, maybe you should be a little more respectful and understanding where he's coming from and try to talk it out with him without trying to pity him and ESPECIALLY without writing disgusting paragraphs about how it's own doing, or that there's other people off worse than he is). He came here to let his story and views be heard, not to start controversy and have people tell him his problem is nothing to be depressed about, etc. Maybe he does need to speak to someone and maybe he doesn't want to admit it but he needs to let it out to people who understand him because he feels he doesn't have anyone else to speak to? Well guess what, the lot of you should be ashamed (not the people trying to provide positive feedback and support). The rude people here know who they are.

 

This forum is about people with a common problem trying to get through it together, to lend a helping hand to each other. There should be NO REASON to put him down in any way or complain that he's whining or anything of the sort. The ONLY reason anyone on here has the right to say anything negative to another person is if they're being a rude person to begin with, like a few of you were towards him.

 

As you could see in his posts, he didn't rebuttal negatively to any of your negative comments that were posted about him. He should be giving some of you advice on how to, even when in a sensitive topic like this, act civilized and respectful without childish remarks that are doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO HELP.

 

Some people are born mentally stronger than others, some are physically stronger, some people are smarter than others. Mentally, he seems in a state of depression and confusion, but does that mean we should call him weak minded and that he's doing it all to himself and to man up and to stop whining, etc.? Definitely. Not. Going. To. Help. Yet some of you chose to be rude even though he wasn't trying to be; the poor guy was just expressing himself, no matter how raw it was for you people to read, that does NOT give you the right to say these things to him. There's always more than one way to do things, and the right way is to, EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T WANT IT, provide some insight and make him feel like he's not alone, and hell, help him even if he doesn't want it until he tells you to not too. I bet you 100 to 1 that even though he says he doesn't want anyone's pity or help, it's better hearing people sympathize and trying to lend out help rather than saying rude disgusting things to him. If your advice is for him to try to pick himself up and dust himself off, clearly you could say it with a lot more respect.

I'm tired of seeing these unhelpful comments and even the people comparing one persons problems to another. Everyone has problems, telling someone about how another person has it worse isn't going to make his mentality a stone fortress and make him immediately forget about the pain that acne has caused him. He is hurting, he is a human being, no matter what the problem is, speaking the way that some of you did, is just not cool and I always lose more and more respect for humanity the more I see how the vast majority really is. NOW can you at least understand a little more why he has lost faith in humanity? The evidence is on this thread right here. It seems where ever he goes, for whatever reason, even to get help. There's always those people that put him down when all he's trying to do is help himself by venting. It would have been a lot more respectful and helpful if the rude ones here just never posted.

Do you think he wants to be this way? Do you think he wants to vent on a forum about the depression in his life and his unfortunate battle with his mental well being? Do you think that he wants to upset you by posting this thread? Do you think he wants or cares if anyone sees life the way he does? The answer is NO. He just wants to share his story with fellow acne sufferers. I don't care if your acne is worse or better than his condition, everyone's got their problems and just because yours seems to be worse to you or is a lot more detrimental to your health, doesn't mean his depression is something to be mocked.

I'm sorry for rambling on, but I just got fed up by some of the comments I read and I'm not a mean person but to those of you who were acting rude for no apparent reason, I'd kindly like for you to never post again when someone is venting. You do not know how to help, nor do I think you care about helping anyone else but yourself because if you did, you'd understand that what was said here by the OP, was NO REASON to write those comments the way some of you did. I mean the OP seems like a decent human being and as much as he doesn't want it, he needs help from those of us who actually care and understand, and if he doesn't want to take the advice, so be it. He's not hurting anyone, and he may be hurting himself, but it's not on purpose and it's not easy for him to not think that way. Believe me I can relate.

In conclusion, I would like for ALL of you to think for a minute. In your mind, really put yourself in his shoes. Just think how he's thinking, why he's thinking it, what causes are behind it, etc. and if you come back here and write a response saying how it's not as hard as he makes it seem to get out of this rut, then please don't bother replying back to any of these points because as I said earlier, not everyone has a stone hard mentality where they can over come any or many of life's problems. Everyone's different and I bet he has tried very hard to help himself to no avail and a venting on a forum where he felt welcome might have been something to get him closer to developing a stronger mind and a stronger urge to better his life, yet I don't see many people trying to relate or sympathize with him, all I see is people being rude towards him, comparing other peoples problems with his own, calling him names and being absolutely careless, arguing what he said rather than trying to help. I may not have a strong mentality, but I am building it, and it's hard for me, but that doesn't mean it's hard for you. Maybe all he needs is a positive place to turn, to help him progressively build up his happiness again; Well, that's probably gone now, thanks to the few of you who were rude and the others who compared his problems instead of leveling with him. This is one perfect reason why he can't get along in society, it's because everywhere he turns, he gets the same bullshit replies over and over and the same rude comments over and over.

 

I'm sick of it and I hope I have changed some of your minds to be more respectful in the future and change your approach on these types of situations. Just remember this, he is depressed, there's no doubt about it. Should we act hard and cruel, or kind and supportive? You decide, but please remember, it's not always the persons fault that their depressed. Some of you are strong mentally, some of you are getting there, some of you aren't. I'm not. Are you going to call me a "phaggot" or tell me that I'm whining if I just need a person too talk to? Or would you rather tell a suicidal person to stop whining. Pathetic, really. For Shame.

If no one else was going to stick up for him, I had to
and sorry if anyone thought any of my comments were rude but if you want to reply to my points,
please be kind and respectful.
Thanks.

I'll play devil's advocate here.  Generally, if people are going to join a forum for their acne, they either don't know how to treat it or they have it bad.  Most people checking out the emotional/psychological section have the latter - severe acne.  When my acne turned from mild to severe, it was like a flip was switched and I lost all my self worth and confidence.  It totally changed how I view people complaining about a tiny zit (I used to be one of those people).  For the people with severe acne, it can completely consume your life - not just one day of a tiny zit.  Potentially years of anxiety over scarring to boot.  People are reacting so strongly to OP because he is the person complaining about the tiny zit.  It's like being the obese girl who hears a skinny girl say she needs to lose weight.  

 

Sometimes people do need a wake up call - OP has normal skin.  Not airbrushed, not poreless, not glowing, but normal.  Nothing to complain about (and if it weren't his skin, it'd be something else!  The media is designed to invent nonexistent "problems").  More than likely, (personal opinion) he has BDD and needs professional help judging by his reaction.  Instead he goes to an acne forum to the emotional section with extremely vulnerable people with "real" issues and says things like "Forget about having a good time, unless it's by yourself."  He's not just going down by himself, he's dragging everyone else with him, which to me seems selfish.  I still think he should get professional help though.

I agree



#78 goodz19

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Posted 10 October 2013 - 08:10 AM

I cannot believe how many of you are telling the OP to stop whining or saying negative comments based on his feelings and views. He's allowed to vent and say what he feels. He's not hurting anyone, he's not being rude or obnoxious, he's telling it how it is based on his life. Do I think he should try a bit harder to help himself? Yes. Of course, but it's not as easy to snap yourself out of a deep depression, I know this first hand.

Many of us can relate to the way he feels and just because you're able to overcome your problems and or your depression, doesn't mean it's easier or easy for everybody else to just take your advice and ride the high horse out of depression town.

The OP didn't come here to whine about his problem (however severe it may be, if it effects him to the point of severe depression, maybe you should be a little more respectful and understanding where he's coming from and try to talk it out with him without trying to pity him and ESPECIALLY without writing disgusting paragraphs about how it's own doing, or that there's other people off worse than he is). He came here to let his story and views be heard, not to start controversy and have people tell him his problem is nothing to be depressed about, etc. Maybe he does need to speak to someone and maybe he doesn't want to admit it but he needs to let it out to people who understand him because he feels he doesn't have anyone else to speak to? Well guess what, the lot of you should be ashamed (not the people trying to provide positive feedback and support). The rude people here know who they are.

 

This forum is about people with a common problem trying to get through it together, to lend a helping hand to each other. There should be NO REASON to put him down in any way or complain that he's whining or anything of the sort. The ONLY reason anyone on here has the right to say anything negative to another person is if they're being a rude person to begin with, like a few of you were towards him.

 

As you could see in his posts, he didn't rebuttal negatively to any of your negative comments that were posted about him. He should be giving some of you advice on how to, even when in a sensitive topic like this, act civilized and respectful without childish remarks that are doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO HELP.

 

Some people are born mentally stronger than others, some are physically stronger, some people are smarter than others. Mentally, he seems in a state of depression and confusion, but does that mean we should call him weak minded and that he's doing it all to himself and to man up and to stop whining, etc.? Definitely. Not. Going. To. Help. Yet some of you chose to be rude even though he wasn't trying to be; the poor guy was just expressing himself, no matter how raw it was for you people to read, that does NOT give you the right to say these things to him. There's always more than one way to do things, and the right way is to, EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T WANT IT, provide some insight and make him feel like he's not alone, and hell, help him even if he doesn't want it until he tells you to not too. I bet you 100 to 1 that even though he says he doesn't want anyone's pity or help, it's better hearing people sympathize and trying to lend out help rather than saying rude disgusting things to him. If your advice is for him to try to pick himself up and dust himself off, clearly you could say it with a lot more respect.

I'm tired of seeing these unhelpful comments and even the people comparing one persons problems to another. Everyone has problems, telling someone about how another person has it worse isn't going to make his mentality a stone fortress and make him immediately forget about the pain that acne has caused him. He is hurting, he is a human being, no matter what the problem is, speaking the way that some of you did, is just not cool and I always lose more and more respect for humanity the more I see how the vast majority really is. NOW can you at least understand a little more why he has lost faith in humanity? The evidence is on this thread right here. It seems where ever he goes, for whatever reason, even to get help. There's always those people that put him down when all he's trying to do is help himself by venting. It would have been a lot more respectful and helpful if the rude ones here just never posted.

Do you think he wants to be this way? Do you think he wants to vent on a forum about the depression in his life and his unfortunate battle with his mental well being? Do you think that he wants to upset you by posting this thread? Do you think he wants or cares if anyone sees life the way he does? The answer is NO. He just wants to share his story with fellow acne sufferers. I don't care if your acne is worse or better than his condition, everyone's got their problems and just because yours seems to be worse to you or is a lot more detrimental to your health, doesn't mean his depression is something to be mocked.

I'm sorry for rambling on, but I just got fed up by some of the comments I read and I'm not a mean person but to those of you who were acting rude for no apparent reason, I'd kindly like for you to never post again when someone is venting. You do not know how to help, nor do I think you care about helping anyone else but yourself because if you did, you'd understand that what was said here by the OP, was NO REASON to write those comments the way some of you did. I mean the OP seems like a decent human being and as much as he doesn't want it, he needs help from those of us who actually care and understand, and if he doesn't want to take the advice, so be it. He's not hurting anyone, and he may be hurting himself, but it's not on purpose and it's not easy for him to not think that way. Believe me I can relate.

In conclusion, I would like for ALL of you to think for a minute. In your mind, really put yourself in his shoes. Just think how he's thinking, why he's thinking it, what causes are behind it, etc. and if you come back here and write a response saying how it's not as hard as he makes it seem to get out of this rut, then please don't bother replying back to any of these points because as I said earlier, not everyone has a stone hard mentality where they can over come any or many of life's problems. Everyone's different and I bet he has tried very hard to help himself to no avail and a venting on a forum where he felt welcome might have been something to get him closer to developing a stronger mind and a stronger urge to better his life, yet I don't see many people trying to relate or sympathize with him, all I see is people being rude towards him, comparing other peoples problems with his own, calling him names and being absolutely careless, arguing what he said rather than trying to help. I may not have a strong mentality, but I am building it, and it's hard for me, but that doesn't mean it's hard for you. Maybe all he needs is a positive place to turn, to help him progressively build up his happiness again; Well, that's probably gone now, thanks to the few of you who were rude and the others who compared his problems instead of leveling with him. This is one perfect reason why he can't get along in society, it's because everywhere he turns, he gets the same bullshit replies over and over and the same rude comments over and over.

 

I'm sick of it and I hope I have changed some of your minds to be more respectful in the future and change your approach on these types of situations. Just remember this, he is depressed, there's no doubt about it. Should we act hard and cruel, or kind and supportive? You decide, but please remember, it's not always the persons fault that their depressed. Some of you are strong mentally, some of you are getting there, some of you aren't. I'm not. Are you going to call me a "phaggot" or tell me that I'm whining if I just need a person too talk to? Or would you rather tell a suicidal person to stop whining. Pathetic, really. For Shame.

If no one else was going to stick up for him, I had to
and sorry if anyone thought any of my comments were rude but if you want to reply to my points,
please be kind and respectful.
Thanks.

Amen, and props to you for your post.

 

No matter how severe the issue is in reality, it can become severe to someone that is spiraling down the drain of depression. 

 

What else would a forum be, especially one titled the Emotional and Psychological Effects of Acne, if people couldnt come here and bitch about their problems, however severe one person deems them.  If you take exception to a post, dont reply.  This isnt roses and candy for any of us, and it affects each of us differently.  If you're one of those that can shrug off acne so that it doesnt affect you emotionally, I congratulate you, but what are you doing in this forum?  If you really have it clinically severe, my condolences; we are here to listen to you bitch and complain too. 



#79 SNDR

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Posted 10 October 2013 - 11:59 AM

I cannot believe how many of you are telling the OP to stop whining or saying negative comments based on his feelings and views. He's allowed to vent and say what he feels. He's not hurting anyone, he's not being rude or obnoxious, he's telling it how it is based on his life. Do I think he should try a bit harder to help himself? Yes. Of course, but it's not as easy to snap yourself out of a deep depression, I know this first hand.

Many of us can relate to the way he feels and just because you're able to overcome your problems and or your depression, doesn't mean it's easier or easy for everybody else to just take your advice and ride the high horse out of depression town.

The OP didn't come here to whine about his problem (however severe it may be, if it effects him to the point of severe depression, maybe you should be a little more respectful and understanding where he's coming from and try to talk it out with him without trying to pity him and ESPECIALLY without writing disgusting paragraphs about how it's own doing, or that there's other people off worse than he is). He came here to let his story and views be heard, not to start controversy and have people tell him his problem is nothing to be depressed about, etc. Maybe he does need to speak to someone and maybe he doesn't want to admit it but he needs to let it out to people who understand him because he feels he doesn't have anyone else to speak to? Well guess what, the lot of you should be ashamed (not the people trying to provide positive feedback and support). The rude people here know who they are.

 

This forum is about people with a common problem trying to get through it together, to lend a helping hand to each other. There should be NO REASON to put him down in any way or complain that he's whining or anything of the sort. The ONLY reason anyone on here has the right to say anything negative to another person is if they're being a rude person to begin with, like a few of you were towards him.

 

As you could see in his posts, he didn't rebuttal negatively to any of your negative comments that were posted about him. He should be giving some of you advice on how to, even when in a sensitive topic like this, act civilized and respectful without childish remarks that are doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO HELP.

 

Some people are born mentally stronger than others, some are physically stronger, some people are smarter than others. Mentally, he seems in a state of depression and confusion, but does that mean we should call him weak minded and that he's doing it all to himself and to man up and to stop whining, etc.? Definitely. Not. Going. To. Help. Yet some of you chose to be rude even though he wasn't trying to be; the poor guy was just expressing himself, no matter how raw it was for you people to read, that does NOT give you the right to say these things to him. There's always more than one way to do things, and the right way is to, EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T WANT IT, provide some insight and make him feel like he's not alone, and hell, help him even if he doesn't want it until he tells you to not too. I bet you 100 to 1 that even though he says he doesn't want anyone's pity or help, it's better hearing people sympathize and trying to lend out help rather than saying rude disgusting things to him. If your advice is for him to try to pick himself up and dust himself off, clearly you could say it with a lot more respect.

I'm tired of seeing these unhelpful comments and even the people comparing one persons problems to another. Everyone has problems, telling someone about how another person has it worse isn't going to make his mentality a stone fortress and make him immediately forget about the pain that acne has caused him. He is hurting, he is a human being, no matter what the problem is, speaking the way that some of you did, is just not cool and I always lose more and more respect for humanity the more I see how the vast majority really is. NOW can you at least understand a little more why he has lost faith in humanity? The evidence is on this thread right here. It seems where ever he goes, for whatever reason, even to get help. There's always those people that put him down when all he's trying to do is help himself by venting. It would have been a lot more respectful and helpful if the rude ones here just never posted.

Do you think he wants to be this way? Do you think he wants to vent on a forum about the depression in his life and his unfortunate battle with his mental well being? Do you think that he wants to upset you by posting this thread? Do you think he wants or cares if anyone sees life the way he does? The answer is NO. He just wants to share his story with fellow acne sufferers. I don't care if your acne is worse or better than his condition, everyone's got their problems and just because yours seems to be worse to you or is a lot more detrimental to your health, doesn't mean his depression is something to be mocked.

I'm sorry for rambling on, but I just got fed up by some of the comments I read and I'm not a mean person but to those of you who were acting rude for no apparent reason, I'd kindly like for you to never post again when someone is venting. You do not know how to help, nor do I think you care about helping anyone else but yourself because if you did, you'd understand that what was said here by the OP, was NO REASON to write those comments the way some of you did. I mean the OP seems like a decent human being and as much as he doesn't want it, he needs help from those of us who actually care and understand, and if he doesn't want to take the advice, so be it. He's not hurting anyone, and he may be hurting himself, but it's not on purpose and it's not easy for him to not think that way. Believe me I can relate.

In conclusion, I would like for ALL of you to think for a minute. In your mind, really put yourself in his shoes. Just think how he's thinking, why he's thinking it, what causes are behind it, etc. and if you come back here and write a response saying how it's not as hard as he makes it seem to get out of this rut, then please don't bother replying back to any of these points because as I said earlier, not everyone has a stone hard mentality where they can over come any or many of life's problems. Everyone's different and I bet he has tried very hard to help himself to no avail and a venting on a forum where he felt welcome might have been something to get him closer to developing a stronger mind and a stronger urge to better his life, yet I don't see many people trying to relate or sympathize with him, all I see is people being rude towards him, comparing other peoples problems with his own, calling him names and being absolutely careless, arguing what he said rather than trying to help. I may not have a strong mentality, but I am building it, and it's hard for me, but that doesn't mean it's hard for you. Maybe all he needs is a positive place to turn, to help him progressively build up his happiness again; Well, that's probably gone now, thanks to the few of you who were rude and the others who compared his problems instead of leveling with him. This is one perfect reason why he can't get along in society, it's because everywhere he turns, he gets the same bullshit replies over and over and the same rude comments over and over.

 

I'm sick of it and I hope I have changed some of your minds to be more respectful in the future and change your approach on these types of situations. Just remember this, he is depressed, there's no doubt about it. Should we act hard and cruel, or kind and supportive? You decide, but please remember, it's not always the persons fault that their depressed. Some of you are strong mentally, some of you are getting there, some of you aren't. I'm not. Are you going to call me a "phaggot" or tell me that I'm whining if I just need a person too talk to? Or would you rather tell a suicidal person to stop whining. Pathetic, really. For Shame.

If no one else was going to stick up for him, I had to
and sorry if anyone thought any of my comments were rude but if you want to reply to my points,
please be kind and respectful.
Thanks.

I'll play devil's advocate here.  Generally, if people are going to join a forum for their acne, they either don't know how to treat it or they have it bad.  Most people checking out the emotional/psychological section have the latter - severe acne.  When my acne turned from mild to severe, it was like a flip was switched and I lost all my self worth and confidence.  It totally changed how I view people complaining about a tiny zit (I used to be one of those people).  For the people with severe acne, it can completely consume your life - not just one day of a tiny zit.  Potentially years of anxiety over scarring to boot.  People are reacting so strongly to OP because he is the person complaining about the tiny zit.  It's like being the obese girl who hears a skinny girl say she needs to lose weight.  

 

Sometimes people do need a wake up call - OP has normal skin.  Not airbrushed, not poreless, not glowing, but normal.  Nothing to complain about (and if it weren't his skin, it'd be something else!  The media is designed to invent nonexistent "problems").  More than likely, (personal opinion) he has BDD and needs professional help judging by his reaction.  Instead he goes to an acne forum to the emotional section with extremely vulnerable people with "real" issues and says things like "Forget about having a good time, unless it's by yourself."  He's not just going down by himself, he's dragging everyone else with him, which to me seems selfish.  I still think he should get professional help though.

 

People are going to come onto this forum for more than just those reasons, maybe sometimes people come on here just for emotional support?
There you go again judging him because YOU think his depression is a joke.

 

Do you people honestly not care for others? I'm sure he doesn't have just one tiny zit and I'm sure it's the scarring that really bothers him that you can't make out in photos. Regardless, he is a human being like you and i and he hurts the same as you and i.

 

His problems, no matter what you think, are real and so what if you think you have it worse or other people have it worse. Why compare their or your problems to them? Yes I understand that there's some serious cases of acne sufferers here, but what makes his problem not a problem, just because someone has it worse?

People coming on this message board should know how acne sufferers are and should understand when someone posts their raw emotions on here. I still don't see why you have to be so selfish as to compare other problems to his, doesn't make sense. He wasn't trying to offend anyone and this forum has 1000s of different cases with different severities and also DIFFERENT REACTIONS.

He's one of many of us who deserve to let out his angers and frustrations due to his depression. He doesn't have any less or more of a right to write out his feelings on here, than anyone else with any severity of acne or scarring or what have you. Just because his problem doesn't seem like one to you, he can't post his feelings just to let them out? Wow, I lose more and more faith in humanity every day.

 

My point is, you should respect all views and opinions and focus on your own problems and not fixate on someone else's and call it bs because you don't see anything wrong.

 

I had severe acne before, never once did I complain when I saw people with less acne when I saw them venting about it. People should understand, even if their depressed as well, as I am. So I ask this, why not take a different approach, rather than judging? Why not just get it through your thick skulls that, yes even though some problems may seem minor to you, it doesn't mean that the person isn't hurting, which you then should immediately understand, not go about it how you people are doing and just throwing remarks and accusations and showing him how much you don't care to understand his situation but rather bash on him because you don't agree. Seriously, it's sickening.

 

He isn't being selfish, he's at a breaking point and needed to vent, plain and simple. It's people like you judging him that makes me sick. He is depressed and needs help. So you're saying just because you think his problems are a joke, it's okay for people to react the way they did towards someone who was STATING how THEY FELT. Not how YOU SHOULD FEEL. The vast majority of society is like you. Non helpful, rude and just plain selfish. I think we know who the selfish ones are. I'm trying to be kind and respectful, while the lot of you are bashing on the OP because you don't agree with what he says and how he feels because you feel it's essentially a joke.

 

Nothing to complain about? Who are you? The Depression Police? Selfishness at it's finest.
All I hear is judge judge judge.
Of course he has something to complain about or else he wouldn't be here. Whatever it is, maybe you don't see it but he feels his skin is not normal, which causes him to be in a deep depression. You're doing no justice for anyone by writing typical judgemental bullshit. Say something productive instead of passing judgement on and doing the opposite of what a forum is for. If you don't have anything good to say, just keep your bs remarks to yourself.

Comparing problems, saying, probably based on your own experience, that just because YOU don't see anything wrong, the OP must be a whiner because he's complaining about something that you don't agree with for whatever reason. Such selfish bs. HIS PROBLEMS ARE NOT ANY LESS OR MORE SEVERE THAN YOURS. This is why I choose not to speak about my problems with anyone because i'd probably get the same reaction by people like you and I rather not indulge in a life conversation with judgemental, selfish, rude people.

 

I never compare my problems with people who have it worse or who have it better. I, like a normal person, compare myself to how I used to look or how I want to be, and I go from there. What the hell is the world coming to when someone who is definitely depressed can't even let his feelings out without being judged? I know the ones who have their mind set will never understand my points because you're too stubborn. All I have to say to you is good luck being like that and I hope no one ever comes to you for help; it would be worse for them and you people probably do it to make yourselves feel better for being so butt hurt that "his problems are nothing to complain about". Really, that's a huge low blow and it DISGUSTS me.

And if that skinny girl really did have a problem that she felt that she was fat, is it better too get to the root of it and understand that she actually sees herself that way or is it better to judge and be a prick because YOU don't think she has a problem. No matter what, I always choose to understand why first, then ask questions later.

 

How is he not one of those vulnerable people? Again, you're being judgemental. You know what, I'm going to stop right there because I realize that people like you just don't understand the concept of Don't Judge a Book by It's Cover and with that, I'm DONE trying to make stubborn people less judgemental. Reply or don't reply back to this post, but I won't be indulging myself in this nonsense any more. Say what you want or whatever but I know I am right.

Being polite and helpful is better than being judgemental and bitter yet this post won't even touch one soul.
Done replying to this nonsense because I know if I reply back to the next post, there'll be more and more and more arguing which I do not care for nor will I take part in any longer.

To those of you who understand and agree, bless you,
to those of you who don't, replying to this will be a waste of your time because I won't give you the time of day any more.
 


Edited by AndySoprano, 10 October 2013 - 12:27 PM.


#80 jfiligree

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Posted 10 October 2013 - 12:40 PM




I cannot believe how many of you are telling the OP to stop whining or saying negative comments based on his feelings and views. He's allowed to vent and say what he feels. He's not hurting anyone, he's not being rude or obnoxious, he's telling it how it is based on his life. Do I think he should try a bit harder to help himself? Yes. Of course, but it's not as easy to snap yourself out of a deep depression, I know this first hand.
Many of us can relate to the way he feels and just because you're able to overcome your problems and or your depression, doesn't mean it's easier or easy for everybody else to just take your advice and ride the high horse out of depression town.
The OP didn't come here to whine about his problem (however severe it may be, if it effects him to the point of severe depression, maybe you should be a little more respectful and understanding where he's coming from and try to talk it out with him without trying to pity him and ESPECIALLY without writing disgusting paragraphs about how it's own doing, or that there's other people off worse than he is). He came here to let his story and views be heard, not to start controversy and have people tell him his problem is nothing to be depressed about, etc. Maybe he does need to speak to someone and maybe he doesn't want to admit it but he needs to let it out to people who understand him because he feels he doesn't have anyone else to speak to? Well guess what, the lot of you should be ashamed (not the people trying to provide positive feedback and support). The rude people here know who they are.
 
This forum is about people with a common problem trying to get through it together, to lend a helping hand to each other. There should be NO REASON to put him down in any way or complain that he's whining or anything of the sort. The ONLY reason anyone on here has the right to say anything negative to another person is if they're being a rude person to begin with, like a few of you were towards him.
 
As you could see in his posts, he didn't rebuttal negatively to any of your negative comments that were posted about him. He should be giving some of you advice on how to, even when in a sensitive topic like this, act civilized and respectful without childish remarks that are doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO HELP.
 
Some people are born mentally stronger than others, some are physically stronger, some people are smarter than others. Mentally, he seems in a state of depression and confusion, but does that mean we should call him weak minded and that he's doing it all to himself and to man up and to stop whining, etc.? Definitely. Not. Going. To. Help. Yet some of you chose to be rude even though he wasn't trying to be; the poor guy was just expressing himself, no matter how raw it was for you people to read, that does NOT give you the right to say these things to him. There's always more than one way to do things, and the right way is to, EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T WANT IT, provide some insight and make him feel like he's not alone, and hell, help him even if he doesn't want it until he tells you to not too. I bet you 100 to 1 that even though he says he doesn't want anyone's pity or help, it's better hearing people sympathize and trying to lend out help rather than saying rude disgusting things to him. If your advice is for him to try to pick himself up and dust himself off, clearly you could say it with a lot more respect.
I'm tired of seeing these unhelpful comments and even the people comparing one persons problems to another. Everyone has problems, telling someone about how another person has it worse isn't going to make his mentality a stone fortress and make him immediately forget about the pain that acne has caused him. He is hurting, he is a human being, no matter what the problem is, speaking the way that some of you did, is just not cool and I always lose more and more respect for humanity the more I see how the vast majority really is. NOW can you at least understand a little more why he has lost faith in humanity? The evidence is on this thread right here. It seems where ever he goes, for whatever reason, even to get help. There's always those people that put him down when all he's trying to do is help himself by venting. It would have been a lot more respectful and helpful if the rude ones here just never posted.
Do you think he wants to be this way? Do you think he wants to vent on a forum about the depression in his life and his unfortunate battle with his mental well being? Do you think that he wants to upset you by posting this thread? Do you think he wants or cares if anyone sees life the way he does? The answer is NO. He just wants to share his story with fellow acne sufferers. I don't care if your acne is worse or better than his condition, everyone's got their problems and just because yours seems to be worse to you or is a lot more detrimental to your health, doesn't mean his depression is something to be mocked.
I'm sorry for rambling on, but I just got fed up by some of the comments I read and I'm not a mean person but to those of you who were acting rude for no apparent reason, I'd kindly like for you to never post again when someone is venting. You do not know how to help, nor do I think you care about helping anyone else but yourself because if you did, you'd understand that what was said here by the OP, was NO REASON to write those comments the way some of you did. I mean the OP seems like a decent human being and as much as he doesn't want it, he needs help from those of us who actually care and understand, and if he doesn't want to take the advice, so be it. He's not hurting anyone, and he may be hurting himself, but it's not on purpose and it's not easy for him to not think that way. Believe me I can relate.
In conclusion, I would like for ALL of you to think for a minute. In your mind, really put yourself in his shoes. Just think how he's thinking, why he's thinking it, what causes are behind it, etc. and if you come back here and write a response saying how it's not as hard as he makes it seem to get out of this rut, then please don't bother replying back to any of these points because as I said earlier, not everyone has a stone hard mentality where they can over come any or many of life's problems. Everyone's different and I bet he has tried very hard to help himself to no avail and a venting on a forum where he felt welcome might have been something to get him closer to developing a stronger mind and a stronger urge to better his life, yet I don't see many people trying to relate or sympathize with him, all I see is people being rude towards him, comparing other peoples problems with his own, calling him names and being absolutely careless, arguing what he said rather than trying to help. I may not have a strong mentality, but I am building it, and it's hard for me, but that doesn't mean it's hard for you. Maybe all he needs is a positive place to turn, to help him progressively build up his happiness again; Well, that's probably gone now, thanks to the few of you who were rude and the others who compared his problems instead of leveling with him. This is one perfect reason why he can't get along in society, it's because everywhere he turns, he gets the same bullshit replies over and over and the same rude comments over and over.
 
I'm sick of it and I hope I have changed some of your minds to be more respectful in the future and change your approach on these types of situations. Just remember this, he is depressed, there's no doubt about it. Should we act hard and cruel, or kind and supportive? You decide, but please remember, it's not always the persons fault that their depressed. Some of you are strong mentally, some of you are getting there, some of you aren't. I'm not. Are you going to call me a "phaggot" or tell me that I'm whining if I just need a person too talk to? Or would you rather tell a suicidal person to stop whining. Pathetic, really. For Shame.
If no one else was going to stick up for him, I had to
and sorry if anyone thought any of my comments were rude but if you want to reply to my points,
please be kind and respectful.
Thanks.

I'll play devil's advocate here.  Generally, if people are going to join a forum for their acne, they either don't know how to treat it or they have it bad.  Most people checking out the emotional/psychological section have the latter - severe acne.  When my acne turned from mild to severe, it was like a flip was switched and I lost all my self worth and confidence.  It totally changed how I view people complaining about a tiny zit (I used to be one of those people).  For the people with severe acne, it can completely consume your life - not just one day of a tiny zit.  Potentially years of anxiety over scarring to boot.  People are reacting so strongly to OP because he is the person complaining about the tiny zit.  It's like being the obese girl who hears a skinny girl say she needs to lose weight.  
 
Sometimes people do need a wake up call - OP has normal skin.  Not airbrushed, not poreless, not glowing, but normal.  Nothing to complain about (and if it weren't his skin, it'd be something else!  The media is designed to invent nonexistent "problems").  More than likely, (personal opinion) he has BDD and needs professional help judging by his reaction.  Instead he goes to an acne forum to the emotional section with extremely vulnerable people with "real" issues and says things like "Forget about having a good time, unless it's by yourself."  He's not just going down by himself, he's dragging everyone else with him, which to me seems selfish.  I still think he should get professional help though.
 
People are going to come onto this forum for more than just those reasons, maybe sometimes people come on here for emotional support?
There you go again judging him because YOU think his depression is a joke.
 
Do you people honestly not care for others? I'm sure he doesn't have just one tiny zit and I'm sure it's the scarring that really bothers him that you can't make out in photos. Regardless, he is a human being like you or i and he hurts the same as you and i.
 
His problems, not matter what you think, are real and so what if you think you have it worse or other people have it worse. Why compare their or your problems to them? People coming on this message board should know how acne sufferers are and should understand when someone posts their raw emotions on here. I still don't see why you have to be so selfish as to compare other problems to his, doesn't make sense.
 
He isn't being selfish, he's at a breaking point and needed to vent, plain and simple. It's people like you judging him that makes me sick. He is depressed and needs help. So you're saying just because you think his problems are a joke, it's okay for people to react the way they did towards someone who was STATING how THEY FELT. Not how YOU SHOULD FEEL. The vast majority of society is like you. Non helpful, rude and just plain selfish. I think we know who the selfish ones are. I'm trying to be kind and respectful, while the lot of you are bashing on the OP because you don't agree with what he says and how he feels because you feel it's essentially a joke.
 
Nothing to complain about? Who are you? The Depression Police? Selfishness at it's finest.
All I hear is judge judge judge.
Of course he has something to complain about or else he wouldn't be here. Whatever it is, maybe you don't see it but he feels his skin is not normal, which causes him to be in a deep depression. You're doing no justice for anyone by writing typical judgemental bullshit. Say something productive instead of passing judgement on and doing the opposite of what a forum is for. If you don't have anything good to say, just keep your bs remarks to yourself.
Comparing problems, saying, probably based on your own experience, that just because YOU don't see anything wrong, the OP must be a whiner because he's complaining about something that you don't agree with for whatever reason. Such selfish bs. HIS PROBLEMS ARE NOT ANY LESS OR MORE SEVERE THAN YOURS. This is why I choose not to speak about my problems with anyone because i'd probably get the same reaction by people like you and I rather not indulge in a life conversation with judgemental, selfish, rude people.
 
I never compare my problems with people who have it worse or who have it better. I, like a normal person, compare myself to how I used to look or how I want to be, and I go from there. What the hell is the world coming to when someone who is definitely depressed can't even let his feelings out without being judged? I know the ones who have their mind set will never understand my points because you're too stubborn. All I have to say to you is good luck being like that and I hope no one ever comes to you for help; it would be worse for them and you people probably do it to make yourselves feel better for being so butt hurt that "his problems are nothing to complain about". Really, that's a huge low blow and it DISGUSTS me.
And if that skinny girl really did have a problem that she felt that she was fat, is it better too get to the root of it and understand that she actually sees herself that way or is it better to judge and be a prick because YOU don't think she has a problem. No matter what, I always choose to understand why first, then ask questions later.
 
How is he not one of those vulnerable people? Again, you're being judgemental. You know what, I'm going to stop right there because I realize that people like you just don't understand the concept of Don't Judge a Book by It's Cover and with that, I'm DONE trying to make stubborn people less judgemental. Reply or don't reply back to this post, but I won't be indulging myself in this nonsense any more. Say what you want or whatever but I know I am right.
Being polite and helpful is better than being judgemental and bitter yet this post won't even touch one soul.
Done replying to this nonsense.
 
You dont have to reply if you dont want to, but this is an open discussion. A few points:

1. YES, some problems are more of an issue than others! Dear Lord, "first world problems" annoy me to no end when they are blown out of proportion to such a high degree. I have waaaay more sympathy for the person with severe acne who has struggled with it for years than the teenager complaining about a tiny zit. That said, from his perspective, it might seem significantly worse...which, if thats the case, he is beyond your help or my help and needs to go to a therapist. THAT'S BEYOND OUR CONTROL. You cannot help him. Speaking from someone who has family with BDD.

2. Reread the post. He says things speaking about acne in general - not just his own! Not ok! There is a difference between saying "acne makes me feel ugly" vs "we as acne sufferers are ugly." Exclusive and inclusive. I go here for support and to support others, not a circle jerk of "we are all ugly and doomed to live alone." And when people who have really bad acne see that, how do you think that makes them feel?

3. For being so preachy about JUDGING, youre sounding pretty judging of ME. Maybe I have severe depression and I am lashing out at him (I dont and Im not, but you dont know that). Maybe my mom died and Im feeling upset about it? HMM. Someone isnt "asking why first." Maybe you shouldn't call me a prick without knowing me. That sounds pretty selfish of *you.* Where is that "respect for everyone" you have?

4. Why the aggressive tone? Heaven forbid someone disagree with your almighty opinion (politely at that).

5. Maybe consider that I was explaining why other people responded the way they did? I have a hunch that OP has BDD, so my sympathies are there if he does as I have said.

Funny how we both "disgust" each other. Please only reply when you lose the self righteous, holier than thou attitude and learn that replying in all caps doesn't make your response any better, it just makes ME WANT TO TURN ON CAPS LOCK TOO.

Ps. Pictures cant hide bad acne or bad scars. Op has neither.

Edited by jfiligree, 10 October 2013 - 12:54 PM.





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