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Don't Feel Able To Carry On Any Longer And Worried About Roaccutane

acne life depression roaccutane pathetic sad pressure desperate suicidal help

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#1 ktlouise

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Posted 02 August 2013 - 05:28 PM

soooo im new to this, i decided to sign up because it's just really refreshing to see other people understanding how i feel because in real life nobody i know does. feel really embarrassed and bitter even about typing anything on here just because i hate the fact that my life has become this and i also hate anyone knowing that i suffer with this condition because it's humiliating, even though nobody on here knows me. but whatever.. over the past few months i've been feeling so low and as pathetic as this sounds, the only thing stopping me from ending it all is the fact that i would feel mean for leaving my mum and also i don't have the guts. i don't leave the house any more, i made the decision to do this because i'm just no way allowing anybody to see me while my skin is like this, occasionally if i'm having a 'good day' (though these are becoming more and more rare) i will put my make up on and go out. i did this the other day and felt really happy i was finally getting out the house, i went shopping but it all went downhill when i went to try some clothes on in the dressing room - i saw my skin in the harsh lighting in the mirror and literally wanted to die lol, i was just thinking to myself 'what were you thinking leaving the house, look at the state you've been walking around in all day' and for the rest of the day i was in a bad mood and shielding my face with my hands everywhere i went, which must have been really annoying for my friend. even going to hospital the other day for my appointment with my dermatologist i was walking round with a blanket held up to my face. i must have looked like such a weirdo - but generally i just stay in the house, as well as hating being seen i also do this to enable me to have some sort of treatment on my face 24/7 because i dunno it just makes me feel better if i know i'm being active in attempting to clear my skin (even though i know deep down it's not working). i'm supposed to be going to leeds festival at the end of this month but i've already made the decision that i'm selling the ticket as soon as it comes, there's just no chance of me being around so many people, camping in tents, wearing no make up etc. and so my friends gonna be really pissed off at me now which is great, i think she can already kind of tell i was regretting buying the ticket because she said to me "please come because it's like the highlight of my summer" so i'm like shit. it's just added pressure along with the fact that i'm supposed to be starting university in september, i'm already a year late (i was basically just being lazy last year and couldn't be arsed going haha) but how am i going to cope being around people and living with people whilst i look like this, i can't do itsad.png and my mum keeps saying "i'm not letting you not go to university, you're not staying here" which again, is more pressure and basically leaves me with no choice and another reason to end it all - what am i meant to do? i can't go because of my skin yet i can't not go because i'm already behind and my mum will think i'm even more of a let down. has anyone elses life been pretty much taken over in a similar way? i feel so trapped and helplesssad.png sorry for the self-pitying excessive rant.. i also want to know peoples experiences with roaccutane. i'm starting it on wednesday (literally can not wait, this is one of the only things keeping me going at the moment after having wanted to take it for so long) and i've read a lot of success stories which really reassure me and a few people saying it didn't work for them as well which actually scares me because am i right in saying that after roaccutane there's not really anything else you can do? i've always viewed it as a last resort sort of thing and the thought of it not working terrifies me and i think that is when i really would give up. but like i said hearing success stories reassures me so if anyone has any positive experiences of roaccutane i'd appreciate hearing them. i'm paranoid that my blood tests will show my cholesterol level as being to high, i'm not fat at all due to the fact i was blessed with a fast metabolism but i do enjoy eating basically everything that's bad for you, if it is to high and i agree to start eating healthily from now on do you think my dermatologist will still let me start the course? i need it so bad. sorry that this is so long, i said to myself when i started typing that i wouldn't go on for so long but this isn't even half of what i need to get out and i've never been good at writing concisely. thanks for reading if you do.



#2 kevindreed

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Posted 02 August 2013 - 06:17 PM

Have you tried over the counter products? Benzoyl peroxide is very effective at healing pimples and stopping breakouts.

I used to get pimples everyday. So I know that your still int hat stage trying to find what will bring you the results your looking for you.

Im telling you its a trial and error, sometimes what you don't think will work could be the cream you need.

 

I used to use dans bp, I used 2 pumps of bp anything less would break me out. I used 2 pumps of cetaphil moisturizer and CVS oilpads to take off the shine off my face

I don't use a cleanser it's not necessary. I shower twice a day before doing the regimen because washing my face in the sink breaks me out.

 

I also didn't shampoo at first because shampoo breaks me out. But I learned that shea butter is perfect for conditioning my hair with zero breakouts.

Its all trial and error and finding what works for you.

What I learned from my skin is if you breakout continuously for 3 days I will continue to breakout. So I kept trying different creams, moisturizers, jojoba oils, till I found the perfect regimen that delivered results.



#3 everythingthatshimmers

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Posted 02 August 2013 - 06:25 PM

I hope you feel better after posting and I also hope you find lots of support on this site. =) I am in the US and currently on Accutane, I am in my fifth month of my course and have had good results so far. In fact, my face and body acne have completely cleared up and I just have some mild hyperpigmentation at this point. Some people break out worse in the beginning as the medication brings everything to the surface and eventually brings forth healthier skin. I was lucky in that I pretty much started clearing up from the beginning. I had a couple of breakouts along the way but they were no worse than before I started Accutane. As far as side effects go, I have experienced fatigue, dry skin and lips, dry throat/thirst, some joint aches that have gone away and some mood swings/irritability. Everyone's experience is different though. If you haven't already, you might want to read some of the Accutane Logs on this site, I still find them to be helpful to compare my side effects/progress and just not to feel so alone in this process. And if journaling helps you, you could even start your own. =) I am 30 years old and have had acne for 10 years. Looking back, the one thing I can tell you is that any skin problems you are having are more noticeable to you than anyone else. The people you see out in public are probably more concerned with their own flaws to even notice your skin. Every now and then I see someone with really severe acne, even worse than mine was, but never once have I thought that they looked grotesque or shouldn't be out in public. Many people deal with acne and I have no doubt you will get it under control, it just takes some of us awhile. In the meantime, focus on your education and have some fun so you will have everything in place with no regrets once your skin is clear. Best of luck to you!



#4 dejaclairevoyant

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Posted 02 August 2013 - 09:31 PM

I'm sorry you're hurting and I totally understand where you're coming from. I've experienced the nightmare in the dressing room many times. I used to have a job cleaning houses and it would be the same with the lightning in the bathrooms. I would come home crying and having panic attacks every day.

 

There is a good chance the Accutane will help you, as it helps lots of people. Also consider giving the regimen a try if you haven't already. It's what saved my skin.

 

One more thing--I highly urge you to GO TO THE FESTIVAL! I love outdoor festivals, so much fun. I actually went to one last year when my acne was very bad. I wore no makeup and as soon as I got there, I realized it didn't matter. A lot of people there had acne and no one gave a shit what anyone else looked like. You know, when you stay at home a lot, you tend to watch television/movies and I think this further skews your perspective... everyone on television is perfect... it tricks your mind into thinking that's the norm, when in reality, if you go to a music festival you will see plenty of zits, crazy hair, dirty faces, missing teeth, cellulite, nudity and people generally wasted off their tits. It's a fun and friendly scene, generally. And trust me, if that's you in your pic, people will think you are pretty, acne or not. You have lovely long hair and a nice face.

 

I'm not trying to be pushy, I'd just hate to see you miss out on the one party scene where looks don't really matter too much. I think once you get there and relax, you'll forget about your troubles and have a great time. Please don't deny yourself that. <3


Current Skin-Care Regimen (A work in progress):

 

Morning:

Gentle wash with DKR cleanser

Benzoyl Peroxide 2.5% (Following Dan's Regimen)

DKR Lotion + A squirt of Argan or Grapeseed oil (The  lotion alone wasn't hydrating enough)

Skin 79 Korean BB Cream (excellent stuff)

 

Evening:

Gentle Wash with DKR Cleanser

Benzoyl Peroxide 2.5% (Following Dan's Regimen)

DKR Lotion + A squirt of Argan or Grapeseed oil

 


#5 Randall Flagg

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Posted 02 August 2013 - 11:19 PM

Hey there, I completely get where you're coming from. I was in that state of mind for SO long where I isolated myself at home all the time...it almost got to be a full year that I did this because I was so ashamed of my skin and didn't want the face the world. If I can give you one bit of advice, please don't subject yourself to this for a lengthy amount of time...it's just so unhealthy for you and the longer you isolate yourself, the harder it becomes to get back out there again...I know from experience because just recently I was able to get my acne completely under control and get my life back on track, and it's like I'm having to start over again with everything in terms of social circle, job, and all that jazz...and it's just so difficult to do that once you've been in hermit mode for quite awhile. I think you should really try your best to get out there and keep up contact with friends and really enjoy your life....you're a young girl with very pretty features and when it comes to your acne, as the old saying goes "this too shall pass." tongue.png

 

I know what it's like to feel hopeless and locked up in a darkness of your own making...but the sooner you give yourself the opportunity to live your life again, the better! You deserve to have fun and make lasting memories for yourself in your youth...and spending all that time alone at home will just make you feel more depressed. That's exactly what happened to me. I'm just now starting a new job and just getting out there again is SUCH a positive thing...making new friends, just talking and interacting with other people...all those little things in life make all the difference.

 

I know you mentioned you're thinking of Accutane, but have you tried the Regimen out of curiosity? The Regimen is what cleared my acne up and gave me this second chance in the first place, and it's a much cheaper option than Accutane and way less scary possible side effects. I think it's worth a try if you haven't tried it yet!

 

Anyways, whatever you decide to do I'm wishing you lots of luck and my thoughts are with you, keep on moving forward on the journey to clear skin and along the way you'll find your happiness again too smile.png Good luck! 


Edited by Randall Flagg, 02 August 2013 - 11:20 PM.

Daily Regimen:
-Clean and Clear Foaming Cleanser
-Dan's 2.5% BP 
-Jojoba oil as moisturizer
 
Nightly Regimen:
-Clean and Clear Foaming Cleanser
-Dan's 2.5% BP
-Cetaphil moisturizer + a few drops of Jojoba oil 
 
My Regimen Log: http://www.acne.org/...gs-regimen-log/
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 


#6 ktlouise

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Posted 03 August 2013 - 08:22 AM

Have you tried over the counter products? Benzoyl peroxide is very effective at healing pimples and stopping breakouts.

I used to get pimples everyday. So I know that your still int hat stage trying to find what will bring you the results your looking for you.

Im telling you its a trial and error, sometimes what you don't think will work could be the cream you need.

 

I used to use dans bp, I used 2 pumps of bp anything less would break me out. I used 2 pumps of cetaphil moisturizer and CVS oilpads to take off the shine off my face

I don't use a cleanser it's not necessary. I shower twice a day before doing the regimen because washing my face in the sink breaks me out.

 

I also didn't shampoo at first because shampoo breaks me out. But I learned that shea butter is perfect for conditioning my hair with zero breakouts.

Its all trial and error and finding what works for you.

What I learned from my skin is if you breakout continuously for 3 days I will continue to breakout. So I kept trying different creams, moisturizers, jojoba oils, till I found the perfect regimen that delivered results.

 

yeah, pretty much every one you could name! i'm currently using a 10% benzoyl peroxide face wash but it's not really doing much. it's such a tedious process, it angers me that people have to spend so much time and money just to get clear skin when a lot of people live in such a way that they should have the worst acne in the world yet have nothing. but thank you for your advice, i'm going to go on the roaccutane and at my next appointment ask the dermatologist which products i should use alongside it and hopefully it will clear. 



I hope you feel better after posting and I also hope you find lots of support on this site. =) I am in the US and currently on Accutane, I am in my fifth month of my course and have had good results so far. In fact, my face and body acne have completely cleared up and I just have some mild hyperpigmentation at this point. Some people break out worse in the beginning as the medication brings everything to the surface and eventually brings forth healthier skin. I was lucky in that I pretty much started clearing up from the beginning. I had a couple of breakouts along the way but they were no worse than before I started Accutane. As far as side effects go, I have experienced fatigue, dry skin and lips, dry throat/thirst, some joint aches that have gone away and some mood swings/irritability. Everyone's experience is different though. If you haven't already, you might want to read some of the Accutane Logs on this site, I still find them to be helpful to compare my side effects/progress and just not to feel so alone in this process. And if journaling helps you, you could even start your own. =) I am 30 years old and have had acne for 10 years. Looking back, the one thing I can tell you is that any skin problems you are having are more noticeable to you than anyone else. The people you see out in public are probably more concerned with their own flaws to even notice your skin. Every now and then I see someone with really severe acne, even worse than mine was, but never once have I thought that they looked grotesque or shouldn't be out in public. Many people deal with acne and I have no doubt you will get it under control, it just takes some of us awhile. In the meantime, focus on your education and have some fun so you will have everything in place with no regrets once your skin is clear. Best of luck to you!

 

i do, it's already helped me a lot just knowing other people are in the same situation, some feeling even worse than me (as callous as that sounds). yeah, really keeping my fingers crossed that i don't get the initial breakout - i don't know how i'll be able to cope! some people say they get acne in places they've never had it before during the ib so i'm really scared. but obviously i'll hold in there if i do as i now know this is the norm. you're right about everyone's experience being different, i just pray i'm one of the lucky ones. to be honest i don't care about having nosebleeds, dry skin, dry lips, depression (can't be any worse than i'm feeling now) etc. the only thing i will be upset about is obviously the ib and if i get facial hair as i've seen some people reportblush.png. really? i'm going to sound like a horrible person and totally apathetic right now, but when i see someone with acne i just think about how horrible it looks and wonder if they're doing something about it, i'm aware i should have more understanding but i can't help it and of course this doesn't help with how i feel about myself. i really hope so, thank yousmile.png



I'm sorry you're hurting and I totally understand where you're coming from. I've experienced the nightmare in the dressing room many times. I used to have a job cleaning houses and it would be the same with the lightning in the bathrooms. I would come home crying and having panic attacks every day.

 

There is a good chance the Accutane will help you, as it helps lots of people. Also consider giving the regimen a try if you haven't already. It's what saved my skin.

 

One more thing--I highly urge you to GO TO THE FESTIVAL! I love outdoor festivals, so much fun. I actually went to one last year when my acne was very bad. I wore no makeup and as soon as I got there, I realized it didn't matter. A lot of people there had acne and no one gave a shit what anyone else looked like. You know, when you stay at home a lot, you tend to watch television/movies and I think this further skews your perspective... everyone on television is perfect... it tricks your mind into thinking that's the norm, when in reality, if you go to a music festival you will see plenty of zits, crazy hair, dirty faces, missing teeth, cellulite, nudity and people generally wasted off their tits. It's a fun and friendly scene, generally. And trust me, if that's you in your pic, people will think you are pretty, acne or not. You have lovely long hair and a nice face.

 

I'm not trying to be pushy, I'd just hate to see you miss out on the one party scene where looks don't really matter too much. I think once you get there and relax, you'll forget about your troubles and have a great time. Please don't deny yourself that. <3

 

it's a nightmare, sometimes if people even just come near me i feel like screaming at them "can you get away from me!" and feel really angry, it's stupid. yeah i'm trying to say to myself that the roaccutane will work and fingers crossed it will, the thing is even when i finish the course and - hopefully - it's worked i'm just going to spend my life thinking 'i hope it's not going to come back'.. god i sound so negative haha. i honestly don't think i can do it, everywhere i go i have to have my face covered in some way and it would just be impossible and ruin not only my experience, but everyone elses who i'm going with as well. i think it'd end up being a waste of money, but it is a shame it's come to this :(. thank you so much - i think i could be at least average looking if only my face wasn't covered with spots but any good features i may have have been totally blighted by my acnesad.png but i still have time to think about the festival anyway, and perhaps if i'm one of the lucky ones my skin will already have started improving. thanks for the advice!



Hey there, I completely get where you're coming from. I was in that state of mind for SO long where I isolated myself at home all the time...it almost got to be a full year that I did this because I was so ashamed of my skin and didn't want the face the world. If I can give you one bit of advice, please don't subject yourself to this for a lengthy amount of time...it's just so unhealthy for you and the longer you isolate yourself, the harder it becomes to get back out there again...I know from experience because just recently I was able to get my acne completely under control and get my life back on track, and it's like I'm having to start over again with everything in terms of social circle, job, and all that jazz...and it's just so difficult to do that once you've been in hermit mode for quite awhile. I think you should really try your best to get out there and keep up contact with friends and really enjoy your life....you're a young girl with very pretty features and when it comes to your acne, as the old saying goes "this too shall pass." tongue.png

 

I know what it's like to feel hopeless and locked up in a darkness of your own making...but the sooner you give yourself the opportunity to live your life again, the better! You deserve to have fun and make lasting memories for yourself in your youth...and spending all that time alone at home will just make you feel more depressed. That's exactly what happened to me. I'm just now starting a new job and just getting out there again is SUCH a positive thing...making new friends, just talking and interacting with other people...all those little things in life make all the difference.

 

I know you mentioned you're thinking of Accutane, but have you tried the Regimen out of curiosity? The Regimen is what cleared my acne up and gave me this second chance in the first place, and it's a much cheaper option than Accutane and way less scary possible side effects. I think it's worth a try if you haven't tried it yet!

 

Anyways, whatever you decide to do I'm wishing you lots of luck and my thoughts are with you, keep on moving forward on the journey to clear skin and along the way you'll find your happiness again too smile.png Good luck! 

 

yeah, it worries me because i know how abnormal this is and i can imagine how weird it might be to go back into the 'real world'. i try to go out but every time i do i end up hating myself even more so it's difficult, i've only been this way for a few months and hopefully it won't be much longer if the roaccutane works. i just hate subjecting myself and other people to the horror that is my facelol.gif

 

i haven't tried the regimen no, is that the kit you buy in the products tab? if god forbid roaccutane doesn't work that may be something i'd consider next as i've seen a few people saying it worked for them. i'm glad for you that you found something that worked boogie.gif , it must be one of the best feelings in the world.

 

thanks so much, i will do and i'm just eagerly awaiting wednesday because i know i'm going to feel so much better once i know i've actually started the course.



#7 SunnySarah

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Posted 03 August 2013 - 09:11 AM

There's a great quote by Roald Dahl that goes 

“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

That quote always makes me feel better when I let my flaws get the best of me. 

Just curious, what type of acne do you have?



#8 ktlouise

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Posted 03 August 2013 - 09:50 AM

There's a great quote by Roald Dahl that goes 

“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

That quote always makes me feel better when I let my flaws get the best of me. 

Just curious, what type of acne do you have?

 

i've heard that before, didn't know it was by roald dahl. it's cuterolleyes.gif have to say though it's impossible for me to not have ugly thoughts looking this bad. one day though! 

 

this probably sounds really stupid but i'm not actually sure, the dermatologist has only ever described it as 'active' and 'moderate' but not as a particular type and i'm not quite sure how to distinguish between the different types. i have a few of the yellow spots and the rest are blackheads and the odd one under the skin... is that cystic?



#9 isaacNeedsHelp

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Posted 03 August 2013 - 10:10 AM

soooo im new to this, i decided to sign up because it's just really refreshing to see other people understanding how i feel because in real life nobody i know does. feel really embarrassed and bitter even about typing anything on here just because i hate the fact that my life has become this and i also hate anyone knowing that i suffer with this condition because it's humiliating, even though nobody on here knows me. but whatever.. over the past few months i've been feeling so low and as pathetic as this sounds, the only thing stopping me from ending it all is the fact that i would feel mean for leaving my mum and also i don't have the guts. i don't leave the house any more, i made the decision to do this because i'm just no way allowing anybody to see me while my skin is like this, occasionally if i'm having a 'good day' (though these are becoming more and more rare) i will put my make up on and go out. i did this the other day and felt really happy i was finally getting out the house, i went shopping but it all went downhill when i went to try some clothes on in the dressing room - i saw my skin in the harsh lighting in the mirror and literally wanted to die lol, i was just thinking to myself 'what were you thinking leaving the house, look at the state you've been walking around in all day' and for the rest of the day i was in a bad mood and shielding my face with my hands everywhere i went, which must have been really annoying for my friend. even going to hospital the other day for my appointment with my dermatologist i was walking round with a blanket held up to my face. i must have looked like such a weirdo - but generally i just stay in the house, as well as hating being seen i also do this to enable me to have some sort of treatment on my face 24/7 because i dunno it just makes me feel better if i know i'm being active in attempting to clear my skin (even though i know deep down it's not working). i'm supposed to be going to leeds festival at the end of this month but i've already made the decision that i'm selling the ticket as soon as it comes, there's just no chance of me being around so many people, camping in tents, wearing no make up etc. and so my friends gonna be really pissed off at me now which is great, i think she can already kind of tell i was regretting buying the ticket because she said to me "please come because it's like the highlight of my summer" so i'm like shit. it's just added pressure along with the fact that i'm supposed to be starting university in september, i'm already a year late (i was basically just being lazy last year and couldn't be arsed going haha) but how am i going to cope being around people and living with people whilst i look like this, i can't do itsad.png and my mum keeps saying "i'm not letting you not go to university, you're not staying here" which again, is more pressure and basically leaves me with no choice and another reason to end it all - what am i meant to do? i can't go because of my skin yet i can't not go because i'm already behind and my mum will think i'm even more of a let down. has anyone elses life been pretty much taken over in a similar way? i feel so trapped and helplesssad.png sorry for the self-pitying excessive rant.. i also want to know peoples experiences with roaccutane. i'm starting it on wednesday (literally can not wait, this is one of the only things keeping me going at the moment after having wanted to take it for so long) and i've read a lot of success stories which really reassure me and a few people saying it didn't work for them as well which actually scares me because am i right in saying that after roaccutane there's not really anything else you can do? i've always viewed it as a last resort sort of thing and the thought of it not working terrifies me and i think that is when i really would give up. but like i said hearing success stories reassures me so if anyone has any positive experiences of roaccutane i'd appreciate hearing them. i'm paranoid that my blood tests will show my cholesterol level as being to high, i'm not fat at all due to the fact i was blessed with a fast metabolism but i do enjoy eating basically everything that's bad for you, if it is to high and i agree to start eating healthily from now on do you think my dermatologist will still let me start the course? i need it so bad. sorry that this is so long, i said to myself when i started typing that i wouldn't go on for so long but this isn't even half of what i need to get out and i've never been good at writing concisely. thanks for reading if you do.





              I Feel You Brah ! wacko.png 


 
Every one that has suffer from acne knows the embarrassment. And how it affects your personal life, it gets in the way with activities, relationships,  work, school, i was the type of person that all stay home when i have bad acne miss school alot, i even cried because i try my best to get rid of acne but nothing ever help, i felt ugly but i knew that having a a positive mind well help me get true it. I try over lots of ways to get of acne, but nothing really help or improve my break outs, but dont dont let it get in your way b/c then you'll feel like crap. What i do to have a positive mind about my acne is to be your self, call your self beautiful and get tru the day.

Here's a Giant heart ^.^  to make your day 
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#10 kevindreed

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Posted 03 August 2013 - 10:15 AM

Cleanser don't do anything to heal acne. Only benzoyl peroxide.



#11 dejaclairevoyant

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Posted 03 August 2013 - 10:50 AM

If it were me, I'd consider giving the regimen a try before accutane, but I understand if you are already too far along in the process of getting it that you can't turn back now. I'm sure you'll be fine, but accutane does have a risk of side effects. The regimen seems to work extremely well for a lot of people and there are no side effects that aren't reversible upon stopping. Either way, between those two things I'm sure one of them will work for you! Keep hope alive! :)


Current Skin-Care Regimen (A work in progress):

 

Morning:

Gentle wash with DKR cleanser

Benzoyl Peroxide 2.5% (Following Dan's Regimen)

DKR Lotion + A squirt of Argan or Grapeseed oil (The  lotion alone wasn't hydrating enough)

Skin 79 Korean BB Cream (excellent stuff)

 

Evening:

Gentle Wash with DKR Cleanser

Benzoyl Peroxide 2.5% (Following Dan's Regimen)

DKR Lotion + A squirt of Argan or Grapeseed oil

 


#12 SunnySarah

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Posted 03 August 2013 - 11:19 AM

There's a great quote by Roald Dahl that goes 

“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

That quote always makes me feel better when I let my flaws get the best of me. 

Just curious, what type of acne do you have?

 

i've heard that before, didn't know it was by roald dahl. it's cuterolleyes.gif have to say though it's impossible for me to not have ugly thoughts looking this bad. one day though! 

 

this probably sounds really stupid but i'm not actually sure, the dermatologist has only ever described it as 'active' and 'moderate' but not as a particular type and i'm not quite sure how to distinguish between the different types. i have a few of the yellow spots and the rest are blackheads and the odd one under the skin... is that cystic?

 I dont think that is cystic acne. Cystic has lots of under the skin ones, that are hard and bumpy. I've never had cystic acne,  so I couldn't tell you what it feels like. If you have moderate acne that has whiteheads, blackheads and a few pimples, then I can help you out. I brokeout with moderate acne about 2 years and I tried many things like benzoyl peroxide and different acne kits, and they helped a little bit, but in the long run they hurt my skin. The benzoyl peroxide helped to get rid of some of the acne, but the normal healthy part of my skin turned red and I could no longer do that. In december of 2012 I started using the clarisonic mia brush and now my skin has very mild acne, and is pretty much clear. In 8 months my skin transformed from moderate acne that has become very sensitive due to overuse of benzoyl peroxide, into smooth, acne-free, clear skin. 



#13 ktlouise

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Posted 04 August 2013 - 11:04 AM

soooo im new to this, i decided to sign up because it's just really refreshing to see other people understanding how i feel because in real life nobody i know does. feel really embarrassed and bitter even about typing anything on here just because i hate the fact that my life has become this and i also hate anyone knowing that i suffer with this condition because it's humiliating, even though nobody on here knows me. but whatever.. over the past few months i've been feeling so low and as pathetic as this sounds, the only thing stopping me from ending it all is the fact that i would feel mean for leaving my mum and also i don't have the guts. i don't leave the house any more, i made the decision to do this because i'm just no way allowing anybody to see me while my skin is like this, occasionally if i'm having a 'good day' (though these are becoming more and more rare) i will put my make up on and go out. i did this the other day and felt really happy i was finally getting out the house, i went shopping but it all went downhill when i went to try some clothes on in the dressing room - i saw my skin in the harsh lighting in the mirror and literally wanted to die lol, i was just thinking to myself 'what were you thinking leaving the house, look at the state you've been walking around in all day' and for the rest of the day i was in a bad mood and shielding my face with my hands everywhere i went, which must have been really annoying for my friend. even going to hospital the other day for my appointment with my dermatologist i was walking round with a blanket held up to my face. i must have looked like such a weirdo - but generally i just stay in the house, as well as hating being seen i also do this to enable me to have some sort of treatment on my face 24/7 because i dunno it just makes me feel better if i know i'm being active in attempting to clear my skin (even though i know deep down it's not working). i'm supposed to be going to leeds festival at the end of this month but i've already made the decision that i'm selling the ticket as soon as it comes, there's just no chance of me being around so many people, camping in tents, wearing no make up etc. and so my friends gonna be really pissed off at me now which is great, i think she can already kind of tell i was regretting buying the ticket because she said to me "please come because it's like the highlight of my summer" so i'm like shit. it's just added pressure along with the fact that i'm supposed to be starting university in september, i'm already a year late (i was basically just being lazy last year and couldn't be arsed going haha) but how am i going to cope being around people and living with people whilst i look like this, i can't do itsad.png and my mum keeps saying "i'm not letting you not go to university, you're not staying here" which again, is more pressure and basically leaves me with no choice and another reason to end it all - what am i meant to do? i can't go because of my skin yet i can't not go because i'm already behind and my mum will think i'm even more of a let down. has anyone elses life been pretty much taken over in a similar way? i feel so trapped and helplesssad.png sorry for the self-pitying excessive rant.. i also want to know peoples experiences with roaccutane. i'm starting it on wednesday (literally can not wait, this is one of the only things keeping me going at the moment after having wanted to take it for so long) and i've read a lot of success stories which really reassure me and a few people saying it didn't work for them as well which actually scares me because am i right in saying that after roaccutane there's not really anything else you can do? i've always viewed it as a last resort sort of thing and the thought of it not working terrifies me and i think that is when i really would give up. but like i said hearing success stories reassures me so if anyone has any positive experiences of roaccutane i'd appreciate hearing them. i'm paranoid that my blood tests will show my cholesterol level as being to high, i'm not fat at all due to the fact i was blessed with a fast metabolism but i do enjoy eating basically everything that's bad for you, if it is to high and i agree to start eating healthily from now on do you think my dermatologist will still let me start the course? i need it so bad. sorry that this is so long, i said to myself when i started typing that i wouldn't go on for so long but this isn't even half of what i need to get out and i've never been good at writing concisely. thanks for reading if you do.





              I Feel You Brah ! wacko.png 


 
Every one that has suffer from acne knows the embarrassment. And how it affects your personal life, it gets in the way with activities, relationships,  work, school, i was the type of person that all stay home when i have bad acne miss school alot, i even cried because i try my best to get rid of acne but nothing ever help, i felt ugly but i knew that having a a positive mind well help me get true it. I try over lots of ways to get of acne, but nothing really help or improve my break outs, but dont dont let it get in your way b/c then you'll feel like crap. What i do to have a positive mind about my acne is to be your self, call your self beautiful and get tru the day.

Here's a Giant heart ^.^  to make your day 
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that sounds like exactly the way i am now, life is so shitsad.png i'm trying not too but i think it's pretty much impossible, especially seeing as a persons face is one of the first things other people look at and base their impression of a person on. i just need to hold in there for these next few months and hopefully my skin will fully transform - this website is helping me a lot. aw thank youbiggrin.png



Cleanser don't do anything to heal acne. Only benzoyl peroxide.

 

in what form?



 

There's a great quote by Roald Dahl that goes 

“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

That quote always makes me feel better when I let my flaws get the best of me. 

Just curious, what type of acne do you have?

 

i've heard that before, didn't know it was by roald dahl. it's cuterolleyes.gif have to say though it's impossible for me to not have ugly thoughts looking this bad. one day though! 

 

this probably sounds really stupid but i'm not actually sure, the dermatologist has only ever described it as 'active' and 'moderate' but not as a particular type and i'm not quite sure how to distinguish between the different types. i have a few of the yellow spots and the rest are blackheads and the odd one under the skin... is that cystic?

 I dont think that is cystic acne. Cystic has lots of under the skin ones, that are hard and bumpy. I've never had cystic acne,  so I couldn't tell you what it feels like. If you have moderate acne that has whiteheads, blackheads and a few pimples, then I can help you out. I brokeout with moderate acne about 2 years and I tried many things like benzoyl peroxide and different acne kits, and they helped a little bit, but in the long run they hurt my skin. The benzoyl peroxide helped to get rid of some of the acne, but the normal healthy part of my skin turned red and I could no longer do that. In december of 2012 I started using the clarisonic mia brush and now my skin has very mild acne, and is pretty much clear. In 8 months my skin transformed from moderate acne that has become very sensitive due to overuse of benzoyl peroxide, into smooth, acne-free, clear skin. 

 

yeah i like to think it's not at that stage but i can't say for sure. mine sounds like what you described though - what benzoyl peroxide product did you use? was it like a cream/gel or what? i just looked up that brush and wow mellow.png  i need money haha. i'd be scared of paying for it and it not even working. having said that it would be nice to have something to use sort of as a maintenance thing once i've finished my course of roaccutane, presuming that it works.



If it were me, I'd consider giving the regimen a try before accutane, but I understand if you are already too far along in the process of getting it that you can't turn back now. I'm sure you'll be fine, but accutane does have a risk of side effects. The regimen seems to work extremely well for a lot of people and there are no side effects that aren't reversible upon stopping. Either way, between those two things I'm sure one of them will work for you! Keep hope alive! smile.png

 

i think i am, and also i don't have to pay for roaccutane which means no chance of more money wasted so i might as well give it go! but seeing so many people say they got clear with the regimen is promising and something i would definitely consider. like i said i need a maintenance product to keep up the - hopefully - good results of the roaccutane after i finish so maybe i'd use the regimen products for that? i'm really hoping so, feeling better since signing up to this and knowing that the roaccutane could finally be the beginning of the end. thanks so muchproud.gif



#14 SunnySarah

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Posted 04 August 2013 - 11:35 AM

Sxdness, when my skin first started to break out in November 2011 I bought the Pevonia Spa Teen line, and it felt good on my skin, but my skin just continued to breakout. I used that for a few months and then I started washing my face with Panoxyl BP that you can buy at CVS for under $10. That helped a little bit, but after use of 3 months my skin become super sensitive, red and it was still broken out. If I had to rate on a scale of 1 to 10 (1 being clear skin and 10 being severe cystic acne) my skin in November 2011 to March 2012 was a 6. I've never had cystic acne though, if that helps. Then in March 2012, I started trying the Proactiv kit, and that helped a bit, my skin went down to about a 4-5. The acne was less bumpy, but it was still sensitive and slightly pink and after a few months the Proactiv didn't do much for me except make my skin sensitive. In Summer of 2012, I tried tanning, which made my skin look more of an even tone, but then in Fall of 2012, my tan faded and I noticed some hyperpigmentation. Fall and Winter of 2012, I still had a steady case of 4-5 rate acne in my opinion and I had some hyperpigmentation from tanning while having acne. In December of 2012 I first bought and used the clarisonic. My skin immediately felt smoother and less bumpy, but I was still breaking out in little areas like normal. By March of 2013, my skin was breaking out less and less and I had noticed that some hyperpigmentation had faded. Also, I quit using benzoyl peroxide in Fall of 2012. I have tried using it a few times after that, but every time my skin flushes red and so I stay away from it now. In the beginning of 2013, I started using Neutrogena pink grapefruit wash because salycylic acid is less harsh on your skin than BP. That helped some of the redness, but my skin was still a little pink. Now, August of 2013, my skin is amazing. I would rate it a 2 out of 10, because I still get the occasional pimple. In the mornings I wash my face with Clinique redness relief cream cleanser. That is great stuff, my skin doesn't feel sensitive anymore and my skin is now all the same color, no pink to it. In the evenings I take my makeup off with a foaming salycylic acid cleanser. The gel formula seems to irritate my skin a bit more than foaming. I use the Aveeno foaming cleanser, I can't remember the name though. Then I put La roche posay clarifying foaming gel on my clarisonic and finish washing my face. After that I use Clinique Even better dark spot corrector, which to this day I have used for 4 weeks. I definitely notice a difference and my skin is pretty much even toned as of now. If I get a pimple I apply the Mario Badescu drying lotion on the spot and it will clear up in a few days. Every week I use a face mask because of the nice feel and it just makes my skin even better. I switch off between Murad clarifying Mask, which soothes any inflamed acne, brightens my face and gives my skin a dose of sulfur, which always clears out any acne. Or I use the Queen Helene Mint Julep Mask, which I love the smell of. It tightens my pores and flattens any bumps. The one thing that really transformed my skin was the clarisonic though. It definitely is expensive, but now that I look back on how much money I spent on other acne kits and products, it really is not that bad. My skin is healtheir, cleaner, clearer, I honestly cannot describe how amazing it feels to wakeup and not have to worry about my skin. Even though my skin was never severe or cystic, it still made me self conscious and sad. I now have clear skin and it may sound weird but acne made me a better person. If I never went through acne, I think I would be more self-absorbed, less appreciative of other things in my life and not be so humble. Acne is an experience that alot of people go through, but it is really how you deal with it that makes you who you are. 



#15 Aiko1992

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Posted 06 September 2013 - 04:21 PM

I´m so sorry for reading your story, i can feel what you are feeling right now. Hate, disgusted, scare, sad, and so many other things that only those who suffer from acne will really understand.

 

I´ll tell you a little bit about my experience acne so you will feel a little bit better. I have acne since i was 11 or 12 years old, i would say that i´m battling acne for 11 years now i´m 21 years old and my skin got a little bit better than it was before when i was about 16 or 19. I still have some ugly, red marks, i don´t actually have no pimples left, no bumps just acne red marks, i do have a pimple here or there but my red marks and scars seem to be more visible. Now, i tried everything for my skin, i tried Benzoyl Peroxide it did seem to help at first, but then it made my face look kind of dark. My skin is very pale so my acne marks are way more visible, when i tried Benzoy of Peroxide it really didn´t work anymore, it made me have more breakouts especially in my forehead. I decided to suspended and i never went to the dermatologist again. 

 

The worst of all is that all of my family have clear skin so i totally feel like a monster. Because my older two sisters never had acne, not even a pimple. My mother never had acne either, and my dad too. One of my cousins had severe acne, but now it´s gone so for them acne is now in the past. But sadly for me is not. I just don´t know what else to do, i drink alot of water, i start it to eat healthy food, i decided not to wear makeup which it could be a very huge challenge because makeup can make your face look much better. The only thing that i do wear is a little bit of blush on my cheeks and that´s it. But you can still see my ugly skin, sometimes i´m in my bedroom and i start to think about how LUCKY i´m. why? Well, because i see so many people in the world with disabilities, and i know i always say the same thing but you have to understand that life is beautiful and that there are more people out there who are in a worst position than you.

 

Some of them have hiv, cancer, burn survivors, blind, amputee and yet they still enjoy life to the fullest. I took a look at myself in the mirror and i said to myself ´´Look at your body, you have a healthy body, you have all of your body parts´´ What i mean by this is that for example people who are disfigured for life, they are going to be like that till the day they die and they can´t cover that up with makeup like we can do that with our acne. Take a look at yourself in the mirror and see the beautifl woman that you are. Acne has a solution, other problems don´t have a solution like people who are burn or who are amputee. Love what you have and trust me you won´t believe in this now but acne totally has a solution and people will not worry about your flaws, they have other problems in their life instead of judging you because of your skin. Live life to the fullest, life is short. 


people like to succeed. but they hate successful people.

if you don´t accept who you are...who else is gonna do it?

 

If a guy doesn´t love because of your acne...If a guy doesn´t accepts you for who you are...than he was never worth your time.eusa_naughty.gif


#16 AlexanderJ86

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Posted 06 September 2013 - 04:36 PM

soooo im new to this, i decided to sign up because it's just really refreshing to see other people understanding how i feel because in real life nobody i know does. feel really embarrassed and bitter even about typing anything on here just because i hate the fact that my life has become this and i also hate anyone knowing that i suffer with this condition because it's humiliating, even though nobody on here knows me. but whatever.. over the past few months i've been feeling so low and as pathetic as this sounds, the only thing stopping me from ending it all is the fact that i would feel mean for leaving my mum and also i don't have the guts. i don't leave the house any more, i made the decision to do this because i'm just no way allowing anybody to see me while my skin is like this, occasionally if i'm having a 'good day' (though these are becoming more and more rare) i will put my make up on and go out. i did this the other day and felt really happy i was finally getting out the house, i went shopping but it all went downhill when i went to try some clothes on in the dressing room - i saw my skin in the harsh lighting in the mirror and literally wanted to die lol, i was just thinking to myself 'what were you thinking leaving the house, look at the state you've been walking around in all day' and for the rest of the day i was in a bad mood and shielding my face with my hands everywhere i went, which must have been really annoying for my friend. even going to hospital the other day for my appointment with my dermatologist i was walking round with a blanket held up to my face. i must have looked like such a weirdo - but generally i just stay in the house, as well as hating being seen i also do this to enable me to have some sort of treatment on my face 24/7 because i dunno it just makes me feel better if i know i'm being active in attempting to clear my skin (even though i know deep down it's not working). i'm supposed to be going to leeds festival at the end of this month but i've already made the decision that i'm selling the ticket as soon as it comes, there's just no chance of me being around so many people, camping in tents, wearing no make up etc. and so my friends gonna be really pissed off at me now which is great, i think she can already kind of tell i was regretting buying the ticket because she said to me "please come because it's like the highlight of my summer" so i'm like shit. it's just added pressure along with the fact that i'm supposed to be starting university in september, i'm already a year late (i was basically just being lazy last year and couldn't be arsed going haha) but how am i going to cope being around people and living with people whilst i look like this, i can't do itsad.png and my mum keeps saying "i'm not letting you not go to university, you're not staying here" which again, is more pressure and basically leaves me with no choice and another reason to end it all - what am i meant to do? i can't go because of my skin yet i can't not go because i'm already behind and my mum will think i'm even more of a let down. has anyone elses life been pretty much taken over in a similar way? i feel so trapped and helplesssad.png sorry for the self-pitying excessive rant.. i also want to know peoples experiences with roaccutane. i'm starting it on wednesday (literally can not wait, this is one of the only things keeping me going at the moment after having wanted to take it for so long) and i've read a lot of success stories which really reassure me and a few people saying it didn't work for them as well which actually scares me because am i right in saying that after roaccutane there's not really anything else you can do? i've always viewed it as a last resort sort of thing and the thought of it not working terrifies me and i think that is when i really would give up. but like i said hearing success stories reassures me so if anyone has any positive experiences of roaccutane i'd appreciate hearing them. i'm paranoid that my blood tests will show my cholesterol level as being to high, i'm not fat at all due to the fact i was blessed with a fast metabolism but i do enjoy eating basically everything that's bad for you, if it is to high and i agree to start eating healthily from now on do you think my dermatologist will still let me start the course? i need it so bad. sorry that this is so long, i said to myself when i started typing that i wouldn't go on for so long but this isn't even half of what i need to get out and i've never been good at writing concisely. thanks for reading if you do.

You should rename your nickname to "sexyness" :P