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Impossible To Date With Bad Acne


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#41 essex11

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 03:42 PM

Datings a bitch, and so is going out clubbing. I always go out, and have hooked up with good looking girls but always think I would never have the confidence to date them because having to worry about how you look all the time when your with them would be too stressful. Alot of people are in the same boat. Its a crap boat!



#42 patrick92

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Posted 16 September 2013 - 11:04 PM

Okay, it is a lot harder to find a someone when you have acne but it's definitely NOT impossible. Probably you'll encounter more girls that don't want to date you but occasionally, if you put yourself out there, there are girls that just don't care about your acne. Seriously, a guy I met last summer had BAAAD acne, cystic acne all over his face and neck and bad scars. He didn't seem to care one bit about it. When he introduced me to his girlfriend I was stunned. She was absolutely smoking hot, intelligent, had flawless skin, and really niced. It wasn't even that he was succesful, I believe he worked in retail. He was just really confident and all his friends seemed to love him and enjoy his company. And to be honest, he wasn't really attractive even if he didn't have acne, just confident and fun to be around

 

You've probably had it up to here with these stories of succes but I can't stand these absolute statements. I agree acne makes dating a lot harder for guys/girls, but it's definitely not impossible. If you play your cards right, be more confident, you might even find a really beautiful girl that loves you.

Couldn't agree with you more. It's definitely much harder to find someone willing to date you when you have acne, but not impossible. Personally I've yet to meet anyone who's found me attractive, but I'm also the first to admit that my low self esteem certainly doesn't do me any favors. I have come across a few people like the guy you mentioned, and I have always really admired how they are able to just live life without letting their acne get to them. I'm often annoyed that I can't let myself do the same.


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#43 AlexanderJ86

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Posted 20 September 2013 - 09:41 AM

I know someone who has cystic acne and I believe he has a girlfriend right now.



#44 TemperateCent

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Posted 13 December 2013 - 07:09 PM

I've never seen any adult with bad acne date a good looking person without acne. I hear about it on the internet but I've never seen it. I hardly even know anyone with ance but the ones I do are single and they don't have low self esteem, people just don't want to date others that have moderate or worse acne.


Edited by TemperateCent, 13 December 2013 - 07:10 PM.

@TemperateCent ; . The reason you still have acne is because you deserve it. 


#45 Spotthedifference

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Posted 14 December 2013 - 09:39 PM

I just want to add here that when I was shy and completely clear I got much less male attention than now that I'm confident and loud with some breakouts.


Currently clear of acne with the occasional hormonal breakout. Check out my routines and progress updates here:
http://www.acne.org/...g-and-duac-gel/

Treat yourself as you treat others.


#46 birdsxfeathers

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Posted 17 December 2013 - 11:41 AM

I would say that initially meeting people to date is definitely more difficult when you're suffering from acne compared to when you have clear skin. The first impression is always about looks, and acne doesn't fit in the picture of 'beautiful.' However, when you've known someone for a longer time they get to know your personality too, and then looks don't matter as much anymore. When I met my boyfriend my skin was really horrible but I always wore makeup so he didn't really know I had acne. However, a few weeks into the relationship I told him about my acne and insecurities and I showed him, and he didn't care at all. However, it is possible that when I would've met him without makeup on he maybe wouldn't have asked me out on a date though. 



#47 TemperateCent

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Posted 21 December 2013 - 08:28 PM

I just want to add here that when I was shy and completely clear I got much less male attention than now that I'm confident and loud with some breakouts.

 

You say that you only have "some breakouts" though. I'm sure you don't look like this:

 

servere_acne.jpg

 

post-15066-1119668991.jpg

 

Severe-Acne-02.jpg



I would say that initially meeting people to date is definitely more difficult when you're suffering from acne compared to when you have clear skin. The first impression is always about looks, and acne doesn't fit in the picture of 'beautiful.' However, when you've known someone for a longer time they get to know your personality too, and then looks don't matter as much anymore. When I met my boyfriend my skin was really horrible but I always wore makeup so he didn't really know I had acne. However, a few weeks into the relationship I told him about my acne and insecurities and I showed him, and he didn't care at all. However, it is possible that when I would've met him without makeup on he maybe wouldn't have asked me out on a date though. 

 

This would be harder for men then because of the whole friend zone thing.


@TemperateCent ; . The reason you still have acne is because you deserve it. 


#48 AlexanderJ86

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Posted 22 December 2013 - 02:52 PM

I just want to add here that when I was shy and completely clear I got much less male attention than now that I'm confident and loud with some breakouts.

 

You say that you only have "some breakouts" though. I'm sure you don't look like this:

 

servere_acne.jpg

 

post-15066-1119668991.jpg

 

Severe-Acne-02.jpg



>I would say that initially meeting people to date is definitely more difficult when you're suffering from acne compared to when you have clear skin. The first impression is always about looks, and acne doesn't fit in the picture of 'beautiful.' However, when you've known someone for a longer time they get to know your personality too, and then looks don't matter as much anymore. When I met my boyfriend my skin was really horrible but I always wore makeup so he didn't really know I had acne. However, a few weeks into the relationship I told him about my acne and insecurities and I showed him, and he didn't care at all. However, it is possible that when I would've met him without makeup on he maybe wouldn't have asked me out on a date though. 

 

This would be harder for men then because of the whole friend zone thing.

 

It is still not impossible.



#49 TemperateCent

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Posted 22 December 2013 - 05:39 PM

 

I just want to add here that when I was shy and completely clear I got much less male attention than now that I'm confident and loud with some breakouts.

 

You say that you only have "some breakouts" though. I'm sure you don't look like this:

 

servere_acne.jpg

 

post-15066-1119668991.jpg

 

Severe-Acne-02.jpg



>I would say that initially meeting people to date is definitely more difficult when you're suffering from acne compared to when you have clear skin. The first impression is always about looks, and acne doesn't fit in the picture of 'beautiful.' However, when you've known someone for a longer time they get to know your personality too, and then looks don't matter as much anymore. When I met my boyfriend my skin was really horrible but I always wore makeup so he didn't really know I had acne. However, a few weeks into the relationship I told him about my acne and insecurities and I showed him, and he didn't care at all. However, it is possible that when I would've met him without makeup on he maybe wouldn't have asked me out on a date though.

 

 

This would be harder for men then because of the whole friend zone thing.

It is still not impossible.

 

 

How is it possible if no girl in real life is willing to go out with you because of it?


@TemperateCent ; . The reason you still have acne is because you deserve it. 


#50 Spotthedifference

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Posted 23 December 2013 - 02:58 AM

I just want to add here that when I was shy and completely clear I got much less male attention than now that I'm confident and loud with some breakouts.

 

You say that you only have "some breakouts" though. I'm sure you don't look like this:

 

servere_acne.jpg

 

post-15066-1119668991.jpg

 

Severe-Acne-02.jpg



>>I would say that initially meeting people to date is definitely more difficult when you're suffering from acne compared to when you have clear skin. The first impression is always about looks, and acne doesn't fit in the picture of 'beautiful.' However, when you've known someone for a longer time they get to know your personality too, and then looks don't matter as much anymore. When I met my boyfriend my skin was really horrible but I always wore makeup so he didn't really know I had acne. However, a few weeks into the relationship I told him about my acne and insecurities and I showed him, and he didn't care at all. However, it is possible that when I would've met him without makeup on he maybe wouldn't have asked me out on a date though. 

 

This would be harder for men then because of the whole friend zone thing.

 

 

No, but my ex looked almost exactly like the first one, and I still found him immensely attractive. Also, to say the friend zone only applies to men is ridiculously sexist. I've found myself in there a few times for various reasons mostly to do with older women with more money and less morals coming along. Also, I'd argue that people with acne can still be attractive since I've got dates when not wearing any makeup, but I don't think most people here actually want to look at anything positive like that.


Edited by Spotthedifference, 23 December 2013 - 02:59 AM.

Currently clear of acne with the occasional hormonal breakout. Check out my routines and progress updates here:
http://www.acne.org/...g-and-duac-gel/

Treat yourself as you treat others.


#51 TemperateCent

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Posted 24 December 2013 - 03:06 PM

 

I just want to add here that when I was shy and completely clear I got much less male attention than now that I'm confident and loud with some breakouts.

 

You say that you only have "some breakouts" though. I'm sure you don't look like this:

 

servere_acne.jpg

 

post-15066-1119668991.jpg

 

Severe-Acne-02.jpg



>>I would say that initially meeting people to date is definitely more difficult when you're suffering from acne compared to when you have clear skin. The first impression is always about looks, and acne doesn't fit in the picture of 'beautiful.' However, when you've known someone for a longer time they get to know your personality too, and then looks don't matter as much anymore. When I met my boyfriend my skin was really horrible but I always wore makeup so he didn't really know I had acne. However, a few weeks into the relationship I told him about my acne and insecurities and I showed him, and he didn't care at all. However, it is possible that when I would've met him without makeup on he maybe wouldn't have asked me out on a date though.

 

 

This would be harder for men then because of the whole friend zone thing.

 

No, but my ex looked almost exactly like the first one, and I still found him immensely attractive. Also, to say the friend zone only applies to men is ridiculously sexist. I've found myself in there a few times for various reasons mostly to do with older women with more money and less morals coming along. Also, I'd argue that people with acne can still be attractive since I've got dates when not wearing any makeup, but I don't think most people here actually want to look at anything positive like that.

 

 

The friendzone theory is not "sexist" just because it applies more to one gender than another. It's hard for people on here to look at something positive when we only hear anedoctal evidence about it online (but find that it doesn't actually exist in the real world).


@TemperateCent ; . The reason you still have acne is because you deserve it. 


#52 Spotthedifference

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Posted 04 January 2014 - 09:50 AM

I wasn't saying the theory itself was sexist, just that implying it only happens to one sex is incorrect and thus offensive. I wish my ex didn't actually exist in the real world! Although that has nothing to do with his acne. 


Currently clear of acne with the occasional hormonal breakout. Check out my routines and progress updates here:
http://www.acne.org/...g-and-duac-gel/

Treat yourself as you treat others.


#53 looking2thefuture

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Posted 04 January 2014 - 04:34 PM

Ive seen plenty of guys and girls with bad acne dating people with clear skin. In fact as an acne suffer for ten years ive managed to do pretty well in attracting girls and im hardly an archetypal Hollywood looking guy!. At the moment im suffering from a crisis of confidence again linked to an increase in acne over the xmas period and stress due to making a decision to try accutane or not. And this in turn means that I become shy and self conscious. People notice more than the increase in acne. Basically yes people do notice acne there's no getting away from that but also people admire self confidence,positivity,intelligence and a caring nature. Also in terms of physicality im sure if a man or women had amazing features then people notice that more. I mean Cameron Diaz is one of the most beautiful women in the world and she had bad acne. How many blokes would pass of the chance of a date with her because she had bad acne!?. An extreme example I know but a good point I think.  Acne is a flaw. Everybody has flaws that they are concerned about, hardly anyone is perfect. Also everybody on here is trying to correct their acne right? Im sure that if people let others know that they have tried alot to help there acne and wish for it to get better and its not their fault etc any reasonable person would understand this. I think the key is acknowledging that yes you do have acne but your trying to correct it and besides there's so much more to you than your skin condition. I sure wouldn't want to be with a women who didn't understand that! And to be honest I wouldn't want to be "flawless" myself. Theres no doubt about it acne is tough to deal with I feel like crap that at 28 years of age im still dealing with this. However the moment we give into our darkest thoughts is the moment we die. None of us deserve this and lets hope we can all find our cure and live the life we deserve. 



#54 TemperateCent

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Posted 07 January 2014 - 01:56 PM

I wasn't saying the theory itself was sexist, just that implying it only happens to one sex is incorrect and thus offensive. I wish my ex didn't actually exist in the real world! Although that has nothing to do with his acne. 

The theory, even scientifically, is based on the way women act towards men. Thus, it is not sexist for it to apply more to one gender versus another.

 

"In 2001, Psychology Today[7 published the first of their many investigations into friendships between the sexes. In 2011, the magazine published an article[8] specifically on how to make the move from a friend to a romantic partner. The next year, Scientific American[9] reported on a study out of the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire[10] that interviewed 88 pairs of undergraduate male and female friends that found the the men were more likely to be attracted to their female friends (shown below). They were also more likely to think their female friends felt the same way, which was not the case in most pairs. The study was also featured on the Huffington Post"

 

Other studies echo this. Women are less likely to date someone who is a friend than men.


Ive seen plenty of guys and girls with bad acne dating people with clear skin. In fact as an acne suffer for ten years ive managed to do pretty well in attracting girls and im hardly an archetypal Hollywood looking guy!. At the moment im suffering from a crisis of confidence again linked to an increase in acne over the xmas period and stress due to making a decision to try accutane or not. And this in turn means that I become shy and self conscious. People notice more than the increase in acne. Basically yes people do notice acne there's no getting away from that but also people admire self confidence,positivity,intelligence and a caring nature. Also in terms of physicality im sure if a man or women had amazing features then people notice that more. I mean Cameron Diaz is one of the most beautiful women in the world and she had bad acne. How many blokes would pass of the chance of a date with her because she had bad acne!?. An extreme example I know but a good point I think.  Acne is a flaw. Everybody has flaws that they are concerned about, hardly anyone is perfect. Also everybody on here is trying to correct their acne right? Im sure that if people let others know that they have tried alot to help there acne and wish for it to get better and its not their fault etc any reasonable person would understand this. I think the key is acknowledging that yes you do have acne but your trying to correct it and besides there's so much more to you than your skin condition. I sure wouldn't want to be with a women who didn't understand that! And to be honest I wouldn't want to be "flawless" myself. Theres no doubt about it acne is tough to deal with I feel like crap that at 28 years of age im still dealing with this. However the moment we give into our darkest thoughts is the moment we die. None of us deserve this and lets hope we can all find our cure and live the life we deserve. 


Well, you said she "had" bad acne, as in past tense. Why would anyone care about what she had in the past if she looks good now? To be honest, you and some of the other posters in this thread don't have the same problems because judging by your pictures you actually have good skin and are not ugly people. Let's face it, if you're already ugly and have cystic acne to boot no one is going to care about your personality (except as a friend). The only people I know in real life that can't get into relationships have acne. Maybe it's different in your countries.

 

Try to explain this: Women used to compliment my looks and were attracted to me. Once my acne got severe they only want to be friends at most with me and I can't date, period. My personality is not different and I was less confident in the past when I didn't have acne.


Edited by TemperateCent, 07 January 2014 - 01:58 PM.

@TemperateCent ; . The reason you still have acne is because you deserve it. 


#55 Spotthedifference

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Posted 07 January 2014 - 02:05 PM

Am I a woman? Yes. Have I been friend zoned? Yes. Do I care that you think I'm lying? No. teehee.gif


Currently clear of acne with the occasional hormonal breakout. Check out my routines and progress updates here:
http://www.acne.org/...g-and-duac-gel/

Treat yourself as you treat others.


#56 TemperateCent

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Posted 07 January 2014 - 02:14 PM

Am I a woman? Yes. Have I been friend zoned? Yes. Do I care that you think I'm lying? No. teehee.gif

Did I say you were lying? No. Are you assuming things? Yes. Did I ever say that it can't work the other way around? No. Did I say that it applies heavily to one gender more than another? Yes. Are there actual studies done to back up what I am saying? Yes.


Edited by TemperateCent, 07 January 2014 - 02:16 PM.

@TemperateCent ; . The reason you still have acne is because you deserve it. 





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