Posted 30 June 2013 - 07:42 PM
I know it's pathetic but every major life decision I have ever made has been a result of my acne. I am a slave to my acne. I chose my college on the basis that it was close to home, close to my primary support system, close to my safety net, and close to my dermatologists. For the past 5 years, I have chosen to live a largely secluded and unencumbered lifestyle as a result of my acne. I have never seriously considered pursuing meaningful or romantic relationships because I am too preoccupied with and discouraged by my acne. So much of masculine prowess is about exhibiting confidence but acne entirety strips one of any confidence. I cannot realistically pursue romantic endeavors when I am totally and utterly unconfident. I am only ashamed, repulsed, and uninterested.
Like many acne sufferers, I suspect, deep down I am a perfectionist and I will not stop in my pursuit towards a cure until I have attained flawlessly and immaculately clear skin, however unrealistic that may be. There are many things I want out of life but first and foremost - always - it is my skin.
My pain is constant and sharp, and to quote one of my favorite authors, I believe, more than ever in our current world especially, "the better you look, the more you see." Thus, acne is a debilitating and self-limiting condition. I do not know when I will live again but I know that it will never be when my skin is imperfect.
Edited by John457, 30 June 2013 - 10:08 PM.
Current Skincare Regimen
Sircuit X-Trap+ Cleanser
Cerave Facial Moisturizing Lotion, AM
Murad Acne Treatment Concealer
Desert Essence Tea Tree Oil Cleanser
Aura Cacia Grapeseed Oil (as a moisturizer)
Mario Badescu Buffering Lotion (as a spot treatment)
Monthly Chemical Peels (Salicylic and Glycolic Acid Based)
Supplements: Real Food Multi-Vitamin, Nordic Naturals Fish Oil, Vitamin D (5,000 IU daily), Vitamin C.
Diet: Modified Paleo Regimen (gluten-free, dairy-free, soy-free, organic and non-GMO wherever possible, but still consuming GF grains).
Symptoms: Cystic acne, mild rosacea, dry eye syndrome, mild blepharitis, chronic fatigue, digestive issues, brain fog, social anxiety).
Status as of 03/27/2015: Nothing is helping. Seeing a functional medicine practitioner 05/29/2015.